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a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010

the big peeler express

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1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)

SniperWoreConverse posted:

so did the monstor factory just put in 500 grams instead of milligrams or :iiam:

it is definitely a mystery, but there was a whole shitload of expensive rear end (with lots comped) tests to prove exactly what it wasn't and that was definitely one of the first things to rule out. I didn't know this but testing for caffeine can only be done at research labs

GenderSelectScreen
Mar 7, 2010

I DON'T KNOW EITHER DON'T ASK ME
College Slice

1gnoirents posted:

He told me "Rear! Rear yourself!"

Me: "... what? Please-"

EMT: "Squeeze. Squeeze your anus, like your rearing"

Me: *have I gone crazy* "What does that mean!"

EMT: "Pretend your taking a poop"

Me: "????"

EMT: "Now try to stop taking a poop! Do that! Rear your butt!"

And I did. I don't know if it helped but I guess it distracted me from the fear of dying a little.

Monster energy drinks!

Sounds like he was grooming you for sex; be glad you survived with your rear end cherry.

GenderSelectScreen
Mar 7, 2010

I DON'T KNOW EITHER DON'T ASK ME
College Slice
Or did you???

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010

trust me it wasn't his first time :bigtran:

psyopmonkey
Nov 15, 2008

by Lowtax
Energy drinks?! Axe body spray?! Irish carbombs and flaming dr peppers?!

gently caress off retard

:toxogond:

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Necros
Jul 23, 2003

monster guy has me kinda jealous. i had a team of med students and their professor come around every day at 6am while someone ripped a huge wad of packing out of the couple inch deep hole in my groin before stuffing two rolls of packing back into the hole my dignity leaked out of. sometimes they remembered the hydromorphone.

Necros
Jul 23, 2003

*cute asian girls look upon my crotch and nod like theyre working on a crossword*

Suicide Sam E.
Jun 30, 2013

by XyloJW
The new Redbull and vodka

Verve + Mangostein

Someone get on this and report back, TIA.

1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)

Necros posted:

monster guy has me kinda jealous. i had a team of med students and their professor come around every day at 6am while someone ripped a huge wad of packing out of the couple inch deep hole in my groin before stuffing two rolls of packing back into the hole my dignity leaked out of. sometimes they remembered the hydromorphone.

lmao ive had med students crowd in my room for some really normal rear end poo poo (just a physical I think) and that was obnoxious. I cant imagine getting your rear end stuffed in front of them

Necros
Jul 23, 2003

1gnoirents posted:

lmao ive had med students crowd in my room for some really normal rear end poo poo (just a physical I think) and that was obnoxious. I cant imagine getting your rear end stuffed in front of them

kinda more in the area of a hernia i think. everyday for like a week though they came to my room in shock trauma so i could learn true shame. it wasnt even like a small group either there was like a dozen of them lmao.

im pooping!
Nov 17, 2006


its extra fun when the hot blonde nurse hooks up a syringe of water to your catheter, injects your bladder with water, then extracts a huge blood clot back into the syringe, and comments "you handled that well"

well of course i did, ive had a blood clot in my catheter for the past 18 hours and couldn't piss. thanks hot nurse.

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Necros
Jul 23, 2003

aaaaaaaAaAaaaaaaæáäWaàaaaaaaa

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