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Bragged to everyone at work that I could spin around 100 times but fell down after only 28.
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Sep 11, 2014 19:50
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Sep 11, 2014 19:55
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woke up this morning, walked the dog, then went straight back to bed cause I was tired after I woke up again I didn't do anything productive for the rest of the day
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Sep 11, 2014 20:22
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stole some girls seat in class
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Sep 11, 2014 20:33
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punched a freshman in his stupid fuckin face which, while not embarrassing for ME, was for sure, him, since he was w. his gf, whos now mine
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Sep 11, 2014 20:34
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Farted as my roommate came back. I blamed it on burnt popcorn when asked about it but no one is fooled.
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Sep 11, 2014 20:40
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I woke up still drunk this morning. Well I'm not really embarrassed about that or anything, really.
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Sep 11, 2014 20:43
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walked straight off a cliff and died
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Sep 11, 2014 20:44
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A customer misheard me over the phone and got mad. My colleagues laughed at him over the phone, he heard and he got very mad. He came into the store, and I could not contain my amusement, and he got even madder!  I am a terrible employee. 
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Sep 11, 2014 20:49
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failed to summon the nerve to end my poo poo life
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Sep 11, 2014 20:57
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Was browsing the hardware store and realized I got the wrong screws and some old guy asked me if I knew "something". I didn't say no because I thought he was was just asking me something as a person. He then walked me half way across the store (I don't know why I followed) and started asking me about pipe fittings and straps and why he didn't understand the smaller ones were the same price as a bigger ones. I told him they were probably sold by weight like other small pieces of hardware. He started asking me more things and I told him I didn't know and then finally said "Oh... I don't actually work here or anything" and he got embarrassed and said he saw me pouring screws into the bucket so thought I worked there. We were both embarrassed. The staff all wear uniform shirts so I have no idea why he asked me, a dude in office attire. I hope the OP is an old dude and it was me he asked.
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Sep 11, 2014 21:42
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I farted on a public street. There were other people within 80ft. I lucked out though, it was a silent fart.
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Sep 11, 2014 23:03
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I was waiting at a crosswalk and some guy asked me where a nearby street was so I pointed and said "Yeah, it's a block that way," and then the light changed so I walked away. Once I got across the street I looked back and noticed the dude was blind 
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Sep 11, 2014 23:29
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I woke up and still exist.
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Sep 11, 2014 23:45
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I got impatient in a convenience store line.
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Sep 11, 2014 23:46
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Baronjutter posted:Was browsing the hardware store and realized I got the wrong screws and some old guy asked me if I knew "something". I didn't say no because I thought he was was just asking me something as a person. He then walked me half way across the store (I don't know why I followed) and started asking me about pipe fittings and straps and why he didn't understand the smaller ones were the same price as a bigger ones. I told him they were probably sold by weight like other small pieces of hardware. He started asking me more things and I told him I didn't know and then finally said "Oh... I don't actually work here or anything" and he got embarrassed and said he saw me pouring screws into the bucket so thought I worked there. We were both embarrassed. The staff all wear uniform shirts so I have no idea why he asked me, a dude in office attire.
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Sep 12, 2014 00:57
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Not today, but on Wednesday I got up early, shaved, showered and caught the bus into work only to be told by the guy at the front desk that it was a public holiday and I could go home.
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Sep 12, 2014 01:55
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I went to take off from the lights in third instead of first but I feel better about that now thanks to you guys.
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Sep 12, 2014 02:23
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i checked out this ashy black lady wearing cheap tight shorts and a stained tshirt at the dollar store probably a hooker i can get laid any time i want i just choose not to maybe you guys should try not being beta males sometime 
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Sep 12, 2014 02:24
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I bought Chipotle for dinner instead of making something fresh myself...
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Sep 12, 2014 02:28
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