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extra stout
Feb 24, 2005

ISILDUR's ERR
does anyone else feel like unimportant know nothing bloggers used to be entertaining and now are actually making the world worse by somehow being taken seriously by lawyers and politicians, businesses, etc?

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9goats dead
Mar 25, 2010

BEAUTIFUL! GORGEOUS! EXCITING!

Muttonchips posted:

Just a reminder that Three Olives actually goes around taking pictures of strangers just to be a complete dick to them in an internet forum.

"God what a fat gently caress- I better take a picture to post on GBS or they'll NEVER believe me"


"I don't care if you're on welfare you can't wear that poo poo to court wtf"


"Look at this goony gently caress heh heh"


He literally took a picture of a poor person who was in semi-casual attire for jury duty.

Doesn't get much lower than that folks.

that's actually pretty funny and you're retarded. lol.

GIANT OUIJA BOARD
Aug 22, 2011

177 Years of Your Dick
All
Night
Non
Stop

iceaim posted:

So 3O is fake posting right? He isn't seriously this delusional is he? He's coming as a Phil Hendrie character.

http://simonjisforjenius.wordpress.com/2014/10/22/i-dont-even-know-what-just-happned-im-thinking-about-suing/

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

FUCK YOU HITLER
STALINGRAD
ROFLMFAO

Three Olives posted:

Whats funny is how they all seem to say the same things you just have to substitute “fat” for “n-word” or “fag” and the words and sentiment are the same.

yes black people make a life choice to be black by deliberately soaking up sun rays more than whites and gay people choose to be gay


but u were born fat right?

Wendigee
Jul 19, 2004

Shut up you stupid human being.

the worst thing is
Oct 3, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

SirEvelynTremble posted:

yes black people make a life choice to be black by deliberately soaking up sun rays more than whites and gay people choose to be gay


but u were born fat right?

butthurt

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

SirEvelynTremble posted:

yes black people make a life choice to be black by deliberately soaking up sun rays more than whites and gay people choose to be gay


but u were born fat right?
jesus christ I don't even know where to begin with how dumb this post is.

Vorik
Mar 27, 2014

Three Olives posted:

I went to a major, but cheap, chain restaurant out on Pacific Beach this morning. There is a grocery store nearby where I have noticed the absolute dreamiest, hunkiest, young man who has been working there for some time. So every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday (I know his schedule well) I go for breakfast and will usually sit through and eat lunch as well (ahhhh the benefits of being on disability! LOL) as I take a table by the window so I can watch this young man work. And to be totally upfront, I am able to fantasize about what I think our lives would be like together. There is a single table in the corner where I can pull my mobility device up and turn the seat so I don’t have to get up and either embarrassingly squeeze into a booth or risk breaking a chair. So far this has not been a problem and the management knows me and respects me as a good customer–they should–they often get 6-10 meals a week out of me.

Today there was some chippy little BITCH and her horrible children sitting at my table when I showed up at my standard time, about 9:30 or so. The hostess who knows me well said something like “I’m sorry Simon, but they should be finishing up soon.” I was more than a little perturbed because I certainly feel like that should keep that table open for me on the three days I come to eat and watch my dream boy. I responded politely “well, how long will I have to wait?” She said “not long, I can seat you at another table until they finish up.” I responded to that, again in my nicest voice possible “I’m already sitting, aren’t I?”

Well minutes passed, that turned into 10 minutes and then 20 and I noticed that the little chippy was just staring out the window, obviously finished eating while letting her children color. I had enough of this garbage as I knew dream boy was already working and I was missing him carry groceries to the cars parked along the street. I went up to her and said “excuse me, you are sitting in my table.” Of course, this “pretty” girl who had probably never been called on her privilege looked shocked at her rudeness being pointed out. Because I was so irate I am not positive what she said but it was something like “I’m waiting for my husband and I can’t get in touch with him…I’m really sorry.”

Me: “Well can you move?”

Of course no response as she stared out the window like a complete dolt. The kids then squeezed close to their mom because no doubt they have been warned about “fat gay monsters” their entire lives.

Me: “excuse me, can you move?”

This is where the story gets really dicey. There were two Navy officers sitting at the table next to her (Father is a retired Navy Captain so I know the difference between enlisted and officers–one of these was a Commander, the other an Ensign). The older of the two spoke up and said extremely rudely, with obvious hate in their voice “leave her alone”

Me: “She has been in my seat long enough, thank you and I have business I need to attend to”‘

Officer: “There are plenty of other open tables” (I am pretty sure he mumbled under his breath “you fat bald queer”)

Me: “I have an agreement with the management, that is my table”

I’m not exactly sure what he said next but it might as well have been “get out of here you loving fat rear end fag before we beat the poo poo out of you” but I took the higher road to ignore the bullying and begin to ignore them and turned my attention to the chippy.

Me: “Can you please move, I’ve said it a couple times, you are in my table”

Chippy, now feigning tears because the “big fat gay monster” is “harassing” her responded with some absolute garbage about being worried about her husband.

Just then the younger Navy officer appeared to be lunging at me from his chair so I let out firm but polite “don’t you come anywhere near me, or I will call the police.” Hearing my warning he instead went to get the manager, who I thought I knew very well, who asked me what the problem was. I told him straightforward that this chippy was in my seat and that I was being harassed for being gay by the two Navy officers.

Now get this. The manager then said “Simon, we have a problem with you every time you come in here. I am asking you to leave an not come back” I told him I would absolutely not leave to which he said he would call the police.

Well after some choice words for all three parties I decided to leave, but they are so screwed. As soon as I get this off my chest I am calling an attorney specializing in gay rights and will be suing both this restaurant chain and the US Navy for: harassment, threats of violence, violations of my civil rights, denying me patronage at a business because of my sexuality and verbal assault.

didn't read

Alas Boobylon
Sep 30, 2014

Gilok posted:

Don't be a dumbass, he's gay, he's not going to reproduce you loving idiot

yes because gay people dont have genes you fat tits mongo

hofnar
Dec 27, 2008

by sebmojo
RIP three olives

Torka
Jan 5, 2008

9goats dead posted:

that's actually pretty funny and you're retarded. lol.

if there really are people who are brought to laughter by an everyday experience like seeing a person who's really fat or badly dressed I envy them, their lives must be amazingly entertaining

Horseshoe theory
Mar 7, 2005

SirEvelynTremble posted:

but u were born fat right?

All babies have baby fat (unless they are born underweight as poo poo), so probably...?

Phaxtor
Sep 18, 2014

by XyloJW

Harald posted:

If you can find a better song than "The Devil went down to Georgiea' I haven't heard it

Didn't we have a thread about this the other day? The only song better than TDWDtG is Pachelbels Cannon in D -- it is such an integral part to modern music. Gotta love that chord progression!

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD
You know what? gently caress all y'all! It was a funny story. Keep on keepin on Three Olives.

Fool and the World
Dec 8, 2010
3o has finally come out of the closet as a good poster

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?

ThirdPartyView posted:

All babies have baby fat (unless they are born underweight as poo poo), so probably...?

My sister was in town last week with her baby and when I told her it was fat she said that it was mean to say that and that my dad said the same thing and then lied that babies are supposed to be fat.

What is the best diet for babies and is there a book that I can send my sister?

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!
it's called 'the 3o kills heself diet'

i promise it'll work, you just have to commit to it

ThisGuy
Aug 16, 2014

This Fuckin' Guy
Guys you shouldn't tease anyone with weight issues. It's actually a mental health issue

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?

ThisGuy posted:

Guys you shouldn't tease anyone with weight issues. It's actually a mental health issue

One time a guy was creeping on me hard and I told him he was fat and ugly and someone like him would never have a chance with someone like me and he tried to kill himself but he lived and thanked me for being honest which was nice because TBQH it would be kind of hard if you made someone suicide instead of just having a cool story about someone attempting suicide over you but living.

I wonder if he is still alive? Eh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1umEXpGHc0E

ThisGuy
Aug 16, 2014

This Fuckin' Guy

Three Olives posted:

One time a guy was creeping on me hard and I told him he was fat and ugly and someone like him would never have a chance with someone like me and he tried to kill himself but he lived and thanked me for being honest which was nice because TBQH it would be kind of hard if you made someone suicide instead of just having a cool story about someone attempting suicide over you but living.

I wonder if he is still alive? Eh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1umEXpGHc0E

Huh. I generally don't notice when people are "creeping" on me. I'm pretty straightforward

Fruity Gordo
Aug 5, 2013

Neurotic, Impotent Rage!
agreed three 'unrepentant arsehole' olives, i get most of my self-confidence from making other people feel like poo poo, because inside i am dead and cold and nasty. kindness is rubbish

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

ThisGuy posted:

Guys you shouldn't tease anyone with weight issues. It's actually a mental health issue
In high school my friends called me fat once and I hadn't really thought about my weight at all to that point. I became a skinny guy after that.

ThisGuy
Aug 16, 2014

This Fuckin' Guy

ArbitraryC posted:

In high school my friends called me fat once and I hadn't really thought about my weight at all to that point. I became a skinny guy after that.

It depends on the context, really. A friend can say something, but it's different when it's some random stranger drive by comment

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

ThisGuy posted:

It depends on the context, really. A friend can say something, but it's different when it's some random stranger drive by comment

No trust me it really hurt, I've had kind of an unhealthy relationship with food since and if my other friends are to believe am unreasonably hard on myself when I gain any weight. On the other hand I'm no longer fat so pros/cons.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

hey whatgs happening in this thread wrt 3o swordfighting and i want to join in lets have a good old cockrub party

Trash Trick
Apr 17, 2014

good thread op. v. meta.

Buschmaki
Dec 26, 2012

‿︵‿︵‿︵‿Lean Addict︵‿︵‿︵‿

Three Olives posted:

One time a guy was creeping on me hard and I told him he was fat and ugly and someone like him would never have a chance with someone like me and he tried to kill himself but he lived and thanked me for being honest which was nice because TBQH it would be kind of hard if you made someone suicide instead of just having a cool story about someone attempting suicide over you but living.

I wonder if he is still alive? Eh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1umEXpGHc0E

3O I am not gay or rich or white or a hick from the South but I'm also beautiful and can really connect with this post because some old man hit on me super hard at a park and it made me feel really uncomfortable; I wish i had your self-confidence to have told that mr. Rogers looking dude to eff off bt oh well. The things we must endure because we like looking good, right?

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oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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Three Olives posted:

posts about fat, disabled, mostly helpless gay men.


drat, talk about 3 strikes.

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