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MY PALE GOTH SKIN
Nov 28, 2006


meow
i have never been to a goonmeet but I've heard good things

like the two dudes who showed up to one and kept screaming a catchphrase they made up ("HO-JACK" or something like that) and high-fiving each other and were so goddamn annoying that Lowtax banned their accounts as soon as he got home

And Two Worlds was taken to a strip club and wrote out a big long detailed report on what happened (someone post this please). The people who took him to the club had a totally different account of how it happened (post this too). I remember something about Two Worlds saying "Vachyna" instead of "Vagina" and Geckolio drawing him a diagram of a vagina

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OldSenileGuy
Mar 13, 2001
Who was the goon at gooncon that took a hooker back to his room, and she gave him half a blowjob and then took his money and left

Blistex
Oct 30, 2003

Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

OldSenileGuy posted:

Who was the goon at gooncon that took a hooker back to his room, and she gave him half a blowjob and then took his money and left

Someone find that post. It was one of the most hilariously depressing things ever.

raditts
Feb 21, 2001

The Kwanzaa Bot is here to protect me.


oval office raja posted:

And Two Worlds was taken to a strip club and wrote out a big long detailed report on what happened (someone post this please). The people who took him to the club had a totally different account of how it happened (post this too). I remember something about Two Worlds saying "Vachyna" instead of "Vagina" and Geckolio drawing him a diagram of a vagina

I"m not sure but I think that happened at a gooncon

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

hey look,
a post

oval office raja posted:

like the two dudes who showed up to one and kept screaming a catchphrase they made up ("HO-JACK" or something like that) and high-fiving each other and were so goddamn annoying that Lowtax banned their accounts as soon as he got home

HO-JACK would later evolve into Bojack Horseman and get a netflix original series.

TOOT BOOT
May 25, 2010

I remember reading some thing about how Geckolio put out a cigarette on some dude's birthday cake and also pissed on it and he ate it

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

I dunno where to find it but ornery bean got hosed by her dog while coincidentally naked after she "tripped" onto the couch when she was like 14 or something because her and her mom would walk around naked. she also had a few really gross stories about her and her boyfriend having threesomes with goons and one of the goons tried to rape her cause they wouldn't include him in one of them and then they all had sex anyway while the rape dude was staying with them out on he he couch. she's cool is what I'm trying to say

I'm also pretty sure the dog wiener went in her butthole

Pillow Clerk
Oct 18, 2008

Al Cowens posted:

That guy who hosted the Tokyo goon meets who was really angry and adamant that everybody follow a very rigid set of rules and etiquette including wives and girlfriends being banned and punished rule breakers by making a lot of noise with an air horn

Which forum did he moderate?

Pillow Clerk
Oct 18, 2008
Geckolio sounds cool.

Egoist
Aug 19, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today
Lipstick Apathy
No it was she was getting a dog toy that had fallen between 2 couches and the dog took advantage.

Also there was only 1 threesome story but other ones where she threw up on his dick and another where she poo poo the bed at a hotel and hid the sheets.

The Queen of Goons.

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

October Revolution posted:

No it was she was getting a dog toy that had fallen between 2 couches and the dog took advantage.

Also there was only 1 threesome story but other ones where she threw up on his dick and another where she poo poo the bed at a hotel and hid the sheets.

The Queen of Goons.

you hung out with her, did she come off as awesomely gross as she did on the forums?

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois

Pillow Clerk posted:

Which forum did he moderate?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOSF9YCfTB8

Egoist
Aug 19, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today
Lipstick Apathy

Aesop Poprock posted:

you hung out with her, did she come off as awesomely gross as she did on the forums?

Not at all really. She showered regularly and didn't smell or do anything gross. Pretty normal until she would start talking about making GBS threads or peeing herself.

BeepBoopBatman
Apr 21, 2008

October Revolution posted:

Pretty normal until she would start talking about making GBS threads or peeing herself.

I thought this was standard practice at a goon meet (vomit also optional)

Egoist
Aug 19, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today
Lipstick Apathy

BeepBoopBatman posted:

I thought this was standard practice at a goon meet (vomit also optional)

True... The last goon meet I was at was a week hang out in northern Quebec for a bunch of us who knew each other for a few years. Everything was fine until the last night one dude violently threw up for a really long time. You could hear him from anywhere in the house, which was this 3 floor almost mansion deal.

raditts
Feb 21, 2001

The Kwanzaa Bot is here to protect me.


Pillow Clerk posted:

Geckolio sounds cool.

Geckolio owns. Haven't seen her in years though and haven't seen her post in just as long so she's probably moved on to better uses of her time.

Lunchmeat Larry
Nov 3, 2012

October Revolution posted:

Not at all really. She showered regularly and didn't smell or do anything gross. Pretty normal until she would start talking about making GBS threads or peeing herself.
how fat was she

MY PALE GOTH SKIN
Nov 28, 2006


meow

raditts posted:

I"m not sure but I think that happened at a gooncon

I think so? I believe it happened in New Orleans. I wish someone would find both accounts because Two Worlds wrote like two thousand words, at least, about it, interspersing the lyrics to the song that was playing at the time, and the other goons were like "a worn-out looking stripper ground around on him for a while, scratched a zit on her asscheek, and said "I think your friend needs to change his pants"

He thought that the fact that "Aerials" by System of a Down was playing was like, super loving significant since his name is Ariel. He also made a fool of himself in a nightclub in toronto iirc. and gave a different stripper his bank card. like, just handed it over to her.

the grossest goonmeet story will always be the :gooncamp: but two worlds was an amazing kind of terrible

Neurosis
Jun 10, 2003
Fallen Rib

Syd Midnight posted:

Nightmarez. He then upgraded to sexually assaulting women, and then (according to fyad) transitioned to female. So whether thats true or not, theres some great stories there from anyone who remembers

lol

this is like the evolution of the goon pokemon type

G-Mawwwwwww
Jan 31, 2003

My LPth are Hot Garbage
Biscuit Hider

raditts posted:

Geckolio owns. Haven't seen her in years though and haven't seen her post in just as long so she's probably moved on to better uses of her time.

She was pretty cool.

Orangegenesis though? Not only cool, now she's like a poledance legend. LIke people will fly her out to other cities to have her lecture and poo poo.

Over There
Jun 28, 2013

by Azathoth
Are you goons in this thread as gross and weird as these stories? gently caress, these people shouldn't breed.

raditts
Feb 21, 2001

The Kwanzaa Bot is here to protect me.


CaptainScraps posted:

She was pretty cool.

Orangegenesis though? Not only cool, now she's like a poledance legend. LIke people will fly her out to other cities to have her lecture and poo poo.

Hold on, what?

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

Over There posted:

Are you goons in this thread as gross and weird as these stories? gently caress, these people shouldn't breed.

I don't know, are you?

Beef Turret
Jul 9, 2009

by Lowtax

Over There posted:

Are you goons in this thread as gross and weird as these stories? gently caress, these people shouldn't breed.

There should be a rule that anyone who makes posts like these has to show a photo of themselves for comparison

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012

Al Cowens posted:

That picture of that gross dude pretending to eat 'poop' (mud) out of a blow-up doll and smiling proudly and smugly like he's the best loving human being in the world.

You are a dumb poo poo cowardly know-nothing that needs to stop loving posting like you are welcome here or anywhere.

whoa

Over There
Jun 28, 2013

by Azathoth

Beef Turret posted:

There should be a rule that anyone who makes posts like these has to show a photo of themselves for comparison

My photos are on the forums already in some of my post history. That's not the point though. I'm just curious to know who here would actually give a dog enough time to actually stick its penis in their rear end in a top hat, call it rape, and then tell people about it.
You guys seem a little bit more sane than that.

Beef Turret
Jul 9, 2009

by Lowtax

Over There posted:

My photos are on the forums already in some of my post history. That's not the point though. I'm just curious to know who here would actually give a dog enough time to actually stick its penis in their rear end in a top hat, call it rape, and then tell people about it.
You guys seem a little bit more sane than that.

Ah, my bad :D

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

Over There posted:

My photos are on the forums already in some of my post history. That's not the point though. I'm just curious to know who here would actually give a dog enough time to actually stick its penis in their rear end in a top hat, call it rape, and then tell people about it.
You guys seem a little bit more sane than that.
99% of these stories involve people no longer active on the forums, so yeah.

G-Mawwwwwww
Jan 31, 2003

My LPth are Hot Garbage
Biscuit Hider

Over There posted:

My photos are on the forums already in some of my post history. That's not the point though. I'm just curious to know who here would actually give a dog enough time to actually stick its penis in their rear end in a top hat, call it rape, and then tell people about it.
You guys seem a little bit more sane than that.

When helldump came out it turned out as regular Dallas goon (who had a thing for me) was a Nazi babyfur. I'm a Jew.

gently caress, I just remembered x jakk. More stories later

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois
I thought X JAKK was funny.

Gravitas Shortfall
Jul 17, 2007

Utility is seven-eighths Proximity.


the only goonmeets I've ever been to are the small london ones and they are just a bunch of uk people drinking in a pub, with a couple of loud US students for flavour.

Fuck Your Website
Nov 29, 2003
FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE

Over There posted:

I'm just curious to know who here would actually give a dog enough time to actually stick its penis in their rear end in a top hat, call it rape, and then tell people about it.
Only a hugely damaged individual desperate to find some vestige of humanity within themselves

Thought that was a given

Agent Escalus
Oct 5, 2002

"I couldn't stop saying aloud how miscast Jim Carrey was!"

oval office raja posted:

i have never been to a goonmeet but I've heard good things

like the two dudes who showed up to one and kept screaming a catchphrase they made up ("HO-JACK" or something like that) and high-fiving each other and were so goddamn annoying that Lowtax banned their accounts as soon as he got home

Close, the phrase was "Ho-Check!", and this was at the official 5 Year anniversary party in Vegas 2004. I think they were trying to start a catchphrase in order for it to migrate back to the Internet. Yes, everyone else hated everything about it.

OldSenileGuy posted:

Who was the goon at gooncon that took a hooker back to his room, and she gave him half a blowjob and then took his money and left

That was also 2k4. I have the video interview of that guy somewhere on my old computer, which was shot right at the entrance of the Imperial Palace for all to see and overhear.

The video was entitled, "Gimme back my 400 dollars"

Ivor Biggun
Apr 30, 2003

A big "Fuck You!" from the Keyhole nebula

Lipstick Apathy

CaptainScraps posted:

gently caress, I just remembered x jakk. More stories later

Wasn't he the one that gave Lowtax some of his hair as a present?

[e] http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2941746&userid=29341&perpage=40&pagenumber=2

Ivor Biggun fucked around with this message at 10:31 on Dec 8, 2014

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Al Nipper
May 7, 2008

by XyloJW
whoops bumped an old thread lol

Al Nipper fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Jan 11, 2015

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