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Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

Life can be full of dangerous activities. At this very second, most of you are probably unsafe. We're here to advise you on the appropriate classes you should you should take, and what safety equipment you should wear when undertaking any activity. Failure to follow safety regulations will result in an immediate stop work order and a discussion with your supervisor. Remember, your safety is your responsibility.

Just to start us off, here are a couple recommendations for daily activities.

Garbage disposal:
PPE required:
Gloves
Protective eye wear
Closed toed shoes

Assigned safety Training:
EHS0604-Hazardous Waste Generator Training
EHS0610 Waste Accumulation
EHS0691 Volume Estimation Sanitary Sewer Overflow


Light bulb replacement
PPE required:
Stable safety ladder
Gloves
Protective eye wear
LOTO sign
2 caution signs

Assigned safety Training:
EHS0278 Ladder Safety Training
EHS0370 Lockout Tagout for Authorized Persons
EHS 302 Laser Safety Training
EHS0356-Nano Safety for Crafts and Technical Work

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Iseeyouseemeseeyou
Jan 3, 2011
eat a bullet

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010

Creating the thread "Help others by recommending the appropriate PPE and Safety Training"
PPE required:
Cyanide pill, ingested

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003


I don't think you are coming from a place with a sufficiently exciting safety culture.

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Passing a movement: Job Hazard Analysis (JHA)

TASKS INVOLVED IN YOUR OPERATION:

  • Access task location via feet / door / door handle
  • Remove pants / underwear
  • Carefully sit on toilet seat maintaining three points of contact with wall or handle (handicapped washrooms)
  • Posture yourself in an ergonomically comfortable seated position
  • Without straining, gently relax sphincter
  • Allow passing of movement to occur
  • Remove toilet paper from dispenser
  • Wipe diligently, but not too diligently (front to back if you are a girl)
  • Carefully replace pants / underwear
  • Egress task location (reverse procedure of access, see above tasks)
  • Apply soap to hands
  • Wash hands with hot water (not in excess of 40 degrees celsius)
  • Dry hands with paper / cloth towel
  • Return to duties

    HAZARDS ASSOCIATED WITH TASK

  • Slips / trips / falls
  • Crush points (penis / zipper)
  • Awkward / heavy shits
  • Strain to abdomen (hernia)
  • Stressed / ruptured sphincter
  • Splashback
  • Fatigue
  • Airborne debris / noxious vapors
  • Contamination of skin / mucous membranes

    HAZARD MITIGATION

  • Conduct pre-task inspection of bathroom area
  • When removing pants keep body parts out of the line of fire
  • Maintain three points of contact when lowering body on to toilet seat
  • Ensure that pre-task stretches / microbreaks are taken to mitigate ergonomic hazards
  • Exhale sharply when expelling movement with feet firmly planted
  • Do not force movement, let the bowels do the work
  • Don a class III or greater particulate filter prior to expelling any gasses or potential solids which may emit fumes
  • Don kevlar or deerskin gloves prior to wiping

I have to do one of these every time I go to the bathroom and it needs both my direct supervisor and CM sign off

BONE DOG fucked around with this message at 05:01 on Dec 15, 2014

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010

mookface posted:

Passing a movement: Job Hazard Analysis (JHA)

TASKS INVOLVED IN YOUR OPERATION:

  • Access task location via feet / door / door handle
  • Remove pants / underwear
  • Carefully sit on toilet seat maintaining three points of contact with wall or handle (handicapped washrooms)
  • Posture yourself in an ergonomically comfortable seated position
  • Without straining, gently open relax sphincter
  • Allow passing of movement to occur
  • Remove toilet paper from dispenser
  • Wipe diligently, but not too diligently (front to back if you are a girl)
  • Carefully replace pants / underwear
  • Egress task location (reverse procedure of access, see above tasks)
  • Apply soap to hands
  • Wash hands with hot water (not in excess of 40 degrees celsius)
  • Dry hands with paper / cloth towel
  • Return to duties

    HAZARDS ASSOCIATED WITH TASK

  • Slips / trips / falls
  • Crush points (penis / zipper)
  • Awkward / heavy shits
  • Strain to abdomen (hernia)
  • Stressed / ruptured sphincter
  • Splashback
  • Fatigue
  • Airborne debris / noxious vapors
  • Contamination of skin / mucous membranes

    HAZARD MITIGATION

  • Conduct pre-task inspection of bathroom area
  • When removing pants keep body parts out of the line of fire
  • Maintain three points of contact when lowering body on to toilet seat
  • Ensure that pre-task stretches / microbreaks are taken to mitigate ergonomic hazards
  • Exhale sharply when expelling movement with feet firmly planted
  • Do not force movement, let the bowels do the work
  • Don a class III or greater particulate filter prior to expelling any gasses or potential solids which may emit fumes
  • Don kevlar or deerskin gloves prior to wiping

I have to do one of these every time I go to the bathroom and it needs both my direct supervisor and CM sign off
mookface should have been the op

Iseeyouseemeseeyou
Jan 3, 2011

a hole-y ghost posted:

mookface should have been the op

Should have been grover's safety tips

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler

a hole-y ghost posted:

mookface should have been the op

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
Tomorrow I will bring in one of our QUAD FOLD FIELD LEVEL RISK ASSESSMENTS and do one up complete with sketch for tasks of your choice

go:

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

mookface posted:

Tomorrow I will bring in one of our QUAD FOLD FIELD LEVEL RISK ASSESSMENTS and do one up complete with sketch for tasks of your choice

go:

Walking a chinchilla.

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy

Spazzle posted:

Walking a chinchilla.

weird, but ok

can the chinchilla also suck itself off because my cousin had a chinchilla that would do that. Paco was a little horndog

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

mookface posted:

weird, but ok

can the chinchilla also suck itself off because my cousin had a chinchilla that would do that. Paco was a little horndog

Mostly they just poop.

Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009

mookface posted:

weird, but ok

can the chinchilla also suck itself off because my cousin had a chinchilla that would do that. Paco was a little horndog

Please write up a protocol on how to handle an autofellating chinchilla.

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy

Helical Nightmares posted:

Please write up a protocol on how to handle an autofellating chinchilla.

I'll incorporate it into the assessment. Any other tasks? I have boxes of these things

Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009

mookface posted:

I'll incorporate it into the assessment. Any other tasks? I have boxes of these things

:catstare: Uh, please define "things" in that sentence. I just got a very disturbing visual of chinchilla daisy chains.

I am Toni Lippi
Aug 16, 2004
Please refer to ISO 9000 as per company sop.

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012
im very pro this thread

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Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

Darkman Fanpage posted:

im very pro this thread

As you should be.

Mookface, where is the promised safety documentation?

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