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Yesterday I watched this woman cook a beef tenderloin on TV. It was the hottest poo poo I'd seen in a while.
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Jan 26, 2015 20:31
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"I'm Chef Kurt. People see my tattoos and piercings and shaved head and imagine that me being a gourmet chef is impossible. I'm here to prove to everyone that a poor kid from the Neo-Aryan Brotherhood can be the superior chef at this competition..."
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Jan 26, 2015 20:33
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Xaris posted:lol its almost impressive how much of a sulking self-hating soulless depressing husk of a human being that alton has become. like i remember him being really lively and fun to watch on Good Eats which was a really awesome show. now when he's on all these stupid contest shows, it just seems like hes loaded up on wellbutrin and wants to kill himself Follow him on twitter, he's still cool & funny just not on Cutt Hroat Chicken for some reason
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Jan 27, 2015 01:35
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Xaris posted:lol its almost impressive how much of a sulking self-hating soulless depressing husk of a human being that alton has become. like i remember him being really lively and fun to watch on Good Eats which was a really awesome show. now when he's on all these stupid contest shows, it just seems like hes loaded up on wellbutrin and wants to kill himself Same but different is myself trying to find a decent home and garden show on HGTV. I mean this guy: http://www.gardenerguy.com/FAQ.html was the Alton Brown of gardening and he's pretty much stopped completely. Cooking channel looked to be a return to showing people how to cook, but even they have gone the asinine reality TV route. gently caress TV.
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Jan 27, 2015 01:47
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If you're on a Food Network show and not loaded up on wellbutrin and/or wanting to kill yourself then you're probably part of the problem. Hi I'm Bobby Flay and I was born with a chipotle lodged in my rectum https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLPbNjBYZ64
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Jan 27, 2015 02:15
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BigBoss posted:Yesterday I watched this woman cook a beef tenderloin on TV. It was the hottest poo poo I'd seen in a while. Who is this? Did you masturbate?
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Jan 27, 2015 04:34
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Noyemi K posted:Follow him on twitter, he's still cool & funny  when it comes to this social media thing.anyways it wast just Cutthroat, although that may be the worst offender of dead-alton, it was pretty much everything I saw him on post Good Eats. the man's gotta eat (and pay for kids college) I suppose
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Jan 27, 2015 04:38
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Cutthroat Kitchen just feels too mean-spirited for my tastes, though.Fog Tripper posted:Same but different is myself trying to find a decent home and garden show on HGTV. I mean this guy: http://www.gardenerguy.com/FAQ.html was the Alton Brown of gardening and he's pretty much stopped completely. Cooking channel looked to be a return to showing people how to cook, but even they have gone the asinine reality TV route. gently caress TV. I sort of wondered if they've ever done a show like the following: Teams consisting of a professional chef partnered with a non-cook and given a similar 'make specific dish' contest. The twist is that the pro-chef is only allowed to give orders and instructions to the non-cook and can't actually do anything themselves. The non-cook has to cook everything based on the orders they're being given to the best of their ability. It seems like it could be a mix of the 'teach people at home how to cook' meets competition stuff. Of course, THAT could turn out to be more mean spirited as some emotionally vulnerable middle-aged person from the midwest breaks down into tears because the guy from Restaurant Impossible won't stop yelling at them for overcooking the eggs and screaming at them how they can't help them. Or they get saddled with a former Chopped contestant who just non-stop starts rattling off ingredients and the non-cook doesn't know what the hell Arugula or chickpeas are because they eat everything either fast food or frozen. JediTalentAgent fucked around with this message at 05:01 on Jan 27, 2015 |
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Jan 27, 2015 04:58
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Cutthroat Kitchen is not about the cooking. It's about trying to gently caress with each other. My favorite episode of it was a celebrity chef episode where they played for charity and that real big guy that pretty much exclusively makes sandwiches and grilled cheese refused to spend any of his money until the last round where he bought out all the auctions for like $100 a piece and ended up winning with almost his entire money stack going to charity. That was great.
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Jan 28, 2015 13:59
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That's why the person who spends the least money usually loses
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Jan 28, 2015 14:23
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I want a show on the food network where I go to exotic taco bells.
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Jan 28, 2015 14:25
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Hello this is Restaurant Impossible. I'm Robert Irvine, professional chef, restauranter, entrepreneur, licensed accountant, expert marketing genius, construction foreman, interior designer, project manager, marriage counselor, family therapist, motivational speaker, and bodybuilder. *Camera focuses on massive biceps, never shows from the waist down to hide the hundreds of missed leg days*
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Jan 28, 2015 15:12
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RaceBannon posted:Who is this? Her name is Sara La Fountain.
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Jan 28, 2015 16:08
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CharlestonJew posted:Hello this is Restaurant Impossible. I'm Robert Irvine, professional chef, restauranter, entrepreneur, licensed accountant, expert marketing genius, construction foreman, interior designer, project manager, marriage counselor, family therapist, motivational speaker, and bodybuilder. *Camera focuses on massive biceps, never shows from the waist down to hide the hundreds of missed leg days* you dont cook with your legs hello
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Jan 28, 2015 19:39
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I'm watching mystery diners right now in a sad hotel room. It's worse than my life.
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Jan 29, 2015 03:34
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Xaris posted:i would but I feel Alton has never been alive. He taught himself to cook after a long and mediocre career making music videos. Not for any love of food but because he recognized that most cooking shows were worthless for the average guy. So he went to cooking school and used his prior film experience to put together a good TV show. Good Eats is a great show but Alton's personality has been fake from day one.
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Jan 29, 2015 03:43
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Feasting on asphalt is better than the last five years of food network
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Jan 29, 2015 05:43
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old dog child posted:Alton has never been alive. He taught himself to cook after a long and mediocre career making music videos. Not for any love of food but because he recognized that most cooking shows were worthless for the average guy. So he went to cooking school and used his prior film experience to put together a good TV show. Good Eats is a great show but Alton's personality has been fake from day one. as opposed to noted genuine personalities giada de laurentis and guy fieri. that fake rear end piece of poo poo needs to make way
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Jan 29, 2015 05:49
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Jonny 290 posted:as opposed to noted genuine personalities giada de laurentis and guy fieri. that fake rear end piece of poo poo needs to make way Everyone on that channel is fake
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Jan 29, 2015 05:53
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old dog child posted:Alton has never been alive. He taught himself to cook after a long and mediocre career making music videos. Not for any love of food but because he recognized that most cooking shows were worthless for the average guy. So he went to cooking school and used his prior film experience to put together a good TV show. Good Eats is a great show but Alton's personality has been fake from day one. enjoying having creative control over your own popular tv show about a hobby you like is probably real see also: his vanity projects where he gets to ride motorcycles / sail boats and eat a lot. i dont think you have to actually fake anythign if you like riding motorcycles and eating.
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Jan 29, 2015 05:55
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but then again marc summers did double dare despite having ocd sooo
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Jan 29, 2015 05:56
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Mange Mite posted:enjoying having creative control over your own popular tv show about a hobby you like is probably real a dude from Hollywood who decides to learn something specifically to make money from it isn't quite the same as what you're saying e: who cares I'm watching Good Eats right now anyway
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Jan 29, 2015 05:59
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old dog child posted:a dude from Hollywood who decides to learn something specifically to make money from it isn't quite the same as what you're saying err pretty sure he went to cookign school because he liked cookign but knew he couldnt star on a cooking show without some formal training. it's pretty well known brown didn't even draw a salary from production funds and only made money from sellign companion books and dvds, in order to have more money to make the show. also for most people in hollywood, being the boss and having creative control is a lot bigger deal than just money
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Jan 29, 2015 06:08
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*artfully teepees two waffle halves over piece of fried chicken*
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Feb 1, 2015 05:42
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the last few hours of spring break 2004 in a hotel in spi were spent watching giada
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Feb 1, 2015 06:08
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i want whatever pills that barefoot contessa was on
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Feb 1, 2015 06:13
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Business Gorillas posted:i want whatever pills that barefoot contessa was on Cymbalta?
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Feb 1, 2015 06:18
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*Smears reduced truffle balsamic goat brain sauce onto the plate* My mother, who died of CANCER, always liked goat brains. I'm going to win this show as a memorial to all of her sacrifices and her CANCER.
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Feb 1, 2015 18:55
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 "My mom died of cancer." "Well my dad ALSO died of cancer." "Really? Well my sister died of cancer." "I have cancer."*all four contestants look at each other awkwardly*
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Feb 1, 2015 18:57
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" I'll tell you one thing, if you're gonna come up and cry some tears about your horrible life, why don't you do it into this sauce because its flavorless needs some salt!" "I agree. You're standing over there, bawling like a baby, and maybe you wouldn't be so teary-eyed if it weren't for the onions really overpowering this dish." "I'm horribly offended you'd try to leverage your dead mother to gain points with us. Sir, you disgust me almost as much as this pasta... The shrimp are cooked to perfection, though..."
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Feb 2, 2015 06:44
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stick it in my garbage bowl
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Feb 2, 2015 08:07
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IT'S COCKTAIL TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME
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Feb 3, 2015 11:03
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"I don't agree with the judges' decision, they're all a bunch of hosed up rapist asshats, at least I'm a chef with some integrity" *tried to lie about whether an ingredient made it on the plate*
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Feb 3, 2015 16:00
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