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Number Two Stunna
Nov 8, 2009

FUCK
How did you get your truck driving licence, OP?

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psyopmonkey
Nov 15, 2008

by Lowtax

SweetKarma posted:

If you think Denny's is ok food then, yeah.

The dumpsters are filled with dead hookers.

Are the dumpsters locked or fenced away?

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

Number Two Stunna posted:

How did you get your truck driving licence, OP?

I went to a truck driving school.

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

psyopmonkey posted:

Are the dumpsters locked or fenced away?

Idk, there's just some dumpsters out back. I haven't done any reconnaissance on the whole dumpster situation.

psyopmonkey
Nov 15, 2008

by Lowtax

SweetKarma posted:

Idk, there's just some dumpsters out back. I haven't done any reconnaissance on the whole dumpster situation.

Eyes-On would be great please.

Can I park in the corner of the lot and sleep in a car? Does it cost money?

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

psyopmonkey posted:

Eyes-On would be great please.

Can I park in the corner of the lot and sleep in a car? Does it cost money?

You could just park your car in the middle of a trucking spot. I hope you like flat tires.

bend it like baked ham
Feb 16, 2009

Fries.
What's the best way to get rid of that dead hooker smell?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6JMQls4b8E

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

Mentos Dan posted:

What's the best way to get rid of that dead hooker smell?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6JMQls4b8E

I don't understand. Was he trying to back up while the kingpin was locked?

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~
I guess that would be the logical conclusion.

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

Mentos Dan posted:

What's the best way to get rid of that dead hooker smell?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6JMQls4b8E

This video pretty much sums up what it's like to be a truck driver. You do stupid poo poo and every other trucker around you is watching. Then you just drive away in shame.

psyopmonkey
Nov 15, 2008

by Lowtax
Are CBs still used? Why? And, for what?

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

psyopmonkey posted:

Are CBs still used? Why? And, for what?

They're used by gay's to do gay things.

awesome-express
Dec 30, 2008

Do female truckers use piss jugs?

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

awesome-express posted:

Do female truckers use piss jugs?

Yes. They have funnels.

Bareback Werewolf
Oct 5, 2013
~*blessed by the algorithm*~

psyopmonkey posted:

Are CBs still used? Why? And, for what?

Look at this cool guy with his cool cat avatar am i rite?

Who Is Paul Blart
Oct 22, 2010
Can I have some money?

mrfreeze
Apr 3, 2009

Jon Arbuckle: Master of pleasuring women

I once nearly uprooted a very small tree with my trailer, then paid a homeless guy $50 to ignore that he saw me while I figured out how to get untangled and get away. There were chunks of wood embedded in the bottom of my trailer that I couldn't dislodge. Dropped it at my delivery and never heard about it again.

Bottom line being you can get away with a LOT with one of the big companies if you don't get caught at the time.

dogdisaster
May 31, 2014

by Lowtax
Fun Shoe
I guess all the good paying local routes require that 1-2 OTR experience? I knew a guy that went for the company paid training but they forced him to contract out with them for 2 years for very little. I don't know how they get by.

dogdisaster fucked around with this message at 15:42 on Apr 21, 2015

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

SweetKarma posted:

I've never never murdered a hooker (I swear) and I've actually never seen a lot lizard. If you're a company driver and you let a hooker into your truck you can bet there are at least a dozen other drivers that saw it and are writing down your truck number.

In other words, you're fired, and you're probably going to jail.

sounds like a bunch of narcs to me

Tato
Jun 19, 2001

DIRECTIVE 236: Promote pro-social values
How much fun is it to do that thing where a lane is closed for construction up ahead and merging is necessary, so you stick your big rear end truck in the middle of both lanes and anoint yourself the holy protector of traffic manners, preventing people from driving in the lane that's going to close and merging at the last minute and instead making them sit in a long line of torment with the mannerly losers? That's good road trolling.

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

Tato posted:

How much fun is it to do that thing where a lane is closed for construction up ahead and merging is necessary, so you stick your big rear end truck in the middle of both lanes and anoint yourself the holy protector of traffic manners, preventing people from driving in the lane that's going to close and merging at the last minute and instead making them sit in a long line of torment with the mannerly losers? That's good road trolling.

ive never seen a truck do this if anything they're much better than the average motorist w/r/t anything lol

Grandma Panic!
Nov 4, 2006
psyopmonkey considering another huge transition itt

Dandywalken
Feb 11, 2014

Billmac posted:

psyopmonkey considering another huge transition itt

Psyopmonkey was once a member of a great big convoy rockin through the night.

Tetramin
Apr 1, 2006

I'ma buck you up.
do/would you bring your girlfriend with u on your trucking journeys?

i met a trucker and his wife/gf or whatever that rode around with him all the time

monkey
Jan 20, 2004

by zen death robot
Yams Fan

Billmac posted:

psyopmonkey considering another huge transition itt

If there was a TV show about the wacky misadventures of an ex military transgendered trucker cruising around america stashing dead hookers in dumpsters, I would watch the poo poo out of it.

that's a big 10-4 good buddy

psyopmonkey
Nov 15, 2008

by Lowtax

monkey posted:

If there was a TV show about the wacky misadventures of an ex military transgendered trucker cruising around america stashing dead hookers in dumpsters, I would watch the poo poo out of it.

that's a big 10-4 good buddy

:aaaaa:

got any sevens
Feb 9, 2013

by Cyrano4747
Did you honk your horn evry time someone made the arm motion at you?

JnnyThndrs
May 29, 2001

HERE ARE THE FUCKING TOWELS

Tato posted:

How much fun is it to do that thing where a lane is closed for construction up ahead and merging is necessary, so you stick your big rear end truck in the middle of both lanes and anoint yourself the holy protector of traffic manners, preventing people from driving in the lane that's going to close and merging at the last minute and instead making them sit in a long line of torment with the mannerly losers? That's good road trolling.

The truth is, it's a helluva lot of fun, the distilled rage from assholes who actually have to WAIT like some sort of lowly commoner is enough to keep you smiling from Winnemucca to SLC.

And SweetKarma is correct, lot lizards are more of an urban legend these days than an actual thing - I've only seen them regularly in the Rust Belt where truck stops tend to be horrid little lovely things jammed into industrial area, rather than gigantic truck-islands like you see in the West.

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Cactus Ghost
Dec 20, 2003

you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

Tato posted:

How much fun is it to do that thing where a lane is closed for construction up ahead and merging is necessary, so you stick your big rear end truck in the middle of both lanes and anoint yourself the holy protector of traffic manners, preventing people from driving in the lane that's going to close and merging at the last minute and instead making them sit in a long line of torment with the mannerly losers? That's good road trolling.

hell, you don't have to be a truck driver to do this

changing lanes to block someone driving like an rear end in a top hat and watching them lose their mind in the rear view mirror is one of my favorite things in the world

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