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zidane13
Jan 2, 2005

by Smythe
You could be making money here, OP, if you play your cards right.

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numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

spaghetti squash
durian
basket of blueberries

Ignatius M. Meen
May 26, 2011

Hello yes I heard there was a lovely trainwreck here and...

op how big is your dick compared to a dollar bill? if your boners are over half the size of a dollar bill your dick size is fine

Happy Bear Suit
Jul 21, 2004

look at porn.

Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh

Try two tablespoons of mandingo semen with breakfast and another before bed. Mix it into a vanilla or grape smoothie to hide the flavor.

If mandingos are rare in your area, you could either post an ad on Craigslist for fresh mandingo semen and just be sure to include "no homo" or "no gay stuff" in the title or just have your wife/gf tie off and save the xxxl condoms from her lunchtime mandingo rendezvous.

Kirk Vikernes fucked around with this message at 23:55 on May 8, 2015

snorch
Jul 27, 2009
Look at some titties trust me out works

zidane13
Jan 2, 2005

by Smythe
no, look at some butts. you can tell whose got your tits but not your butt, a butt can be anything

Neo_Crimson
Aug 15, 2011

"Is that your final dandy?"
hey op i got this one weird trick that'll put over 6 inches on your dick for 5 easy payments of $59.99!!!!!

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Neo_Crimson posted:

hey op i got this one weird trick that'll put over 6 inches on your dick for 5 easy payments of $59.99!!!!!

I sell the same product, but I offer a money back guarantee. It'll work, or NO money back!

Hilario Baldness
Feb 10, 2005

:buddy:



Grimey Drawer
find a smaller partner

zidane13
Jan 2, 2005

by Smythe
are aatrek jokes still funny?

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
They have pills for that now, OP.

Thots and Prayers
Jul 13, 2006

A is the for the atrocious abominated acts that YOu committed. A is also for ass-i-nine, eight, seven, and six.

B, b, b - b is for your belligerent, bitchy, bottomless state of affairs, but why?

C is for the cantankerous condition of our character, you have no cut-out.
Grimey Drawer
Seriously though all that fat is covering it like a stop sign in a snowbank.

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord

Hilario Baldness posted:

find a smaller partner

GF is 5"0 gonna have to find a midget/dwarf at this point.

RaceBannon
Apr 3, 2010
motion of the ocean not the size of the ..buoy

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Kuato posted:

GF is 5"0 gonna have to find a midget/dwarf at this point.

Little person, You monster.

RaceBannon
Apr 3, 2010

VendaGoat posted:

Little person, You monster.

they prefer halfling

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

RaceBannon posted:

they prefer halfling

I cum in pints

a dog from hell
Oct 18, 2009

by zen death robot
Jacking off has always worked for me.

yoyodyne
May 7, 2007
look at pictures of naked men having sex with other naked men

Abdul Alhazred
Mar 15, 2007
do i have a babydick bc i never use it
or do i never use it bc it's a babydick
????????????

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Tying weights to your knob will not help, contrary to the popular myth.

OP, I suggest you chat up Asian dwarf women only, your dick might seem big to them.

a misanthrope
Jun 21, 2010

:burgerpug::burgerpug::burgerpug::burgerpug::burgerpug:
you are a good poster, kuato. isn't that enough to draw in the babes?

old fat bird
Oct 27, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
lose weight

God Damn Dam God
Dec 24, 2004

I push buttons. I turn dials. I read numbers. Sometimes I make up little stories in my head about what the numbers mean.
Grimey Drawer
This one simple trick

Mariana Horchata
Jun 30, 2008

College Slice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0unapYVht7Q

:gizz:

Shoehead
Sep 28, 2005

Wassup, Choom?
Ya need sumthin'?
Learn how to give better head

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

loki naked ladies.

criscodisco
Feb 18, 2004

do it
When you suck another dick you steal the power from that dick. So suck off black guys. Lots of them.

Tony Homo
Oct 30, 2014

by zen death robot
Does anyone else have the problem of your dick going inside your body when it's flaccid? I'm asking for a friend.

Mariana Horchata
Jun 30, 2008

College Slice
holy poo poo straight hetero sex is so gross.

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord

criscodisco posted:

When you suck another dick you steal the power from that dick. So suck off black guys. Lots of them.

Might try this instead of the chopping off other guys dicks, I anticipate some legal repercussions from castrating people (unless I can get some volunteers!)

Tony Homo
Oct 30, 2014

by zen death robot
I bought an Andropenis dick stretcher and it didn't work and hurt.

GUYS STOP
Jun 7, 2003
Grimey Drawer

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Sexual-Health/IS-IT-POSSIBLE-ENLARGE-PANIS-LENGTH/show/1678284

CAPT. Rainbowbeard
Apr 5, 2012

My incredible goodposting transcends time and space but still it cannot transform the xbone into a good console.
Lipstick Apathy
Take massive amounts of growth hormones and poo poo like that. It's easy to get a doctor to write you a prescription, but you have to show him your baby dick.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...

Guys, I'm concerned about the size of my PANIS.

Party In My Diapee
Jan 24, 2014
Cut it off and glue on a big black dildo in its place

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...

Oh wait...

P. A. N. I. S.

Penis and nuts in sack.

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Golden Dragon
Apr 9, 2007

Always speak politely to an enraged Dragon
please post a pic of your tiny dick so we can make fun of it tailor our advice to your specific penis situation

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