Travel Hacks

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Travel Hacks

«‹›2 »

Sponge Baathist: Jan 30, 2010; by FactsAreUseless

If your driving cross country bring a rifle to shoot at strangers across state lines.

:synpa:

# ? May 24, 2015 20:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 16, 2024 21:42

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007; Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

Wear knee high socks when flying to help prevent leg pains on long flights. I got this tip from a British Olympic coach so you know it's true.

# ? May 24, 2015 21:34

de_dust: Jan 21, 2009; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

redshirt posted:

Wear knee high socks when flying to help prevent leg pains on long flights. I got this tip from a British Olympic coach so you know it's true.

I'm on the awful app so it's hard to see, but wtf is your picture of

is it poo

# ? May 24, 2015 21:47

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007; Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

de_dust posted:

I'm on the awful app so it's hard to see, but wtf is your picture of

is it poo

No idea. A gift from a fan.

# ? May 24, 2015 21:49

Jubs: Jul 11, 2006; Boy, I think it's about time I tell you the difference between a man and a woman. A woman isn't a woman unless she's pretty. And a man isn't a man unless he's ugly.

Big Beef City posted:

Reminder: ground corn is an international commodity, used in societies for things like polenta/grits, corn bread, tortillas, and whatever british people and slavs do with it.

Cash in all your travel money to exchange for ground corn. You'd be amazed at how much of it you get for not a lot of $, so think big!

Should I invest all of money in "maize"?

# ? May 25, 2015 00:50

Shadow: Jun 25, 2002

If you have a consulting job that requires travel doesn't the doctor question your issue with travel and ask why you would take such a job?

What's a goon to do to get pillz? :confused:

# ? May 25, 2015 06:17

Pulp Can Move: Oct 4, 2012

if you're on a long, boring flight and run out of big bang theory episodes on your ipad, take off your shirt and start screaming GOD IS GREAT!!! really livens up the rest of the flight.

# ? May 25, 2015 06:23

Cacator: Aug 6, 2005; You're quite good at turning me on.

lol if you don't fly business class

# ? May 25, 2015 06:57

Shadow: Jun 25, 2002

Cacator posted:

lol if you don't fly business class

#truthbombs

# ? May 25, 2015 07:10

Jubs: Jul 11, 2006; Boy, I think it's about time I tell you the difference between a man and a woman. A woman isn't a woman unless she's pretty. And a man isn't a man unless he's ugly.

Pulp Can Move posted:

if you're on a long, boring flight and run out of big bang theory episodes on your ipad, take off your shirt and start screaming GOD IS GREAT!!! really livens up the rest of the flight.

I only know how to scream that in Arabic. Will that work just as well?

# ? May 25, 2015 10:01

proof of concept: Mar 6, 2005; by FactsAreUseless

get drunk in the bar at the terminal and fall asleep before takeoff and it's like time travel

e. fall asleep in your seat on the plane I mean, YOu still need to get on the plane

proof of concept fucked around with this message at 10:14 on May 25, 2015

# ? May 25, 2015 10:07

Bishop: Aug 15, 2000

The very back of the plane becomes an impromptu lounge on overseas flights. Either go drink and meet people back there or have some good pills and time travel

# ? May 25, 2015 10:10

gimme the GOD DAMN candy: Jul 1, 2007

when making your way through airport security, answer every question with 'deez nuts', while doing the taylor swift crotch chop. if you are white and well-dressed no one will question you further. if you are not white they will murder you in a satanic mass on the break room floor.

# ? May 25, 2015 10:17

Free Market Mambo: Jul 26, 2010; by Lowtax

de_dust posted:

tell your doctor you're afraid of flying and he/she will most likely write you a script for some sort of benzo

makes regional or even trans-Atlantic flights pretty chill

take enough with those little bottles of alcohol and you wake up at your destination. it's as close to teleportation we'll ever get

Counterpoint: blood clots.

# ? May 25, 2015 11:15

Cool NIN Shirt: Nov 26, 2007; by vyelkin

Free Market Mambo posted:

Counterpoint: blood clots.

Counterpoint: compression socks

# ? May 25, 2015 11:19

Free Market Mambo: Jul 26, 2010; by Lowtax

Cool NIN Shirt posted:

Counterpoint: compression socks

Lifehack: ziptie you knees.

# ? May 25, 2015 11:21

Jubs: Jul 11, 2006; Boy, I think it's about time I tell you the difference between a man and a woman. A woman isn't a woman unless she's pretty. And a man isn't a man unless he's ugly.

proof of concept posted:

get drunk in the bar at the terminal and fall asleep before takeoff and it's like time travel

e. fall asleep in your seat on the plane I mean, YOu still need to get on the plane

I read this before your edit.

I'm now in jail.

# ? May 25, 2015 11:35

Yaos: Feb 22, 2003; She is a cat of significant gravy.

I used my food stamps to buy a private jet and stocked it with the most expensive boxed wine I could find. I can travel any where in the world and don't even need to go through security. I'll be handing out free crates of Cuban cigars after my next trip. I love being a welfare king and can lavish my many homosexual lovers, all of whom live with me out of wedlock, with expensive gifts.

# ? May 25, 2015 11:36

I am Toni Lippi: Aug 16, 2004

I tie extra shoes around my neck. If I find that I have to take a poo poo while I'm traveling I take the shoes off my feet, poo poo in them, and then leave them where ever. Then I take a pair of shoes from around my neck and put them on my feet.

# ? May 25, 2015 12:56

Kirs: Dec 5, 2014; Apart from drinking, there is absolutely nothing to do here.

I am Toni Lippi posted:

I tie extra shoes around my neck. If I find that I have to take a poo poo while I'm traveling I take the shoes off my feet, poo poo in them, and then leave them where ever. Then I take a pair of shoes from around my neck and put them on my feet.

What do you do if you need to poo poo second time?

# ? May 25, 2015 13:10