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tarlibone
Aug 1, 2014

Am I a... bad person?
AM I??




Fun Shoe

a rowdy mullet posted:

GIVE "EM HELL TERRY ONE HECK OF A SLOMO F BOMB THERE. WAY TO GET YOUR MONEYS WORTH

WHEN MY SON SEES A MANAGER BEGINNING THE FUN PROCESS OF GETTING EJECTED, "GET YOUR MONEY'S WORTH!" IS HIS REFRAIN.

SPEAKING OF GETTING YOUR MONEY'S WORTH... WE WON'T GIVE YOU ONE EJECTION.

WE WON'T GIVE YOU TWO EJECTIONS.

HOLLER AT THE NEAREST UMP NOW, AND GET THREE EJECTIONS!! ASK ABOUT OUR BOB DAVIDSON SPECIAL, AND GET A FAN AND A MASCOT EJECTED, TOO!!

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goobernoodles
May 28, 2011

Wayne Leonard Kirby.

Orioles Magician.

Pancakes posted:

WE'RE GOING TO MATCH THAT OFFER DOWN HERE IN ST. LOUIS.
THINK AGAIN. :boom:


ORIOLES WIN. SWEEP DOUBLEHEADER WITH TWO SHUTOUTS, SWEEP THE SERIES AND TAKE FIRST PLACE IN THE AL EAST. :sweep::sweep::sweep:

Boomer The Cannon
Oct 27, 2011

Gotta see it live!


THIS TEAM IS loving EMBARASSING

CAN WE BORROW THAT TORNADO WHEN YOURE DONE WITH IT, ST LOUIS?

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast

Boomer The Cannon posted:

THIS TEAM IS loving EMBARASSING

CAN WE BORROW THAT TORNADO WHEN YOURE DONE WITH IT, ST LOUIS?

I'M GOING TO RECOMMEND AGAINST THAT MY FRIEND. WHEN A TWISTER TOUCHED DOWN IN MY PARENTS' BACK YARD ABOUT 11 YEARS AGO IT ONLY MISSED KILLING ME BY A FEW FEET. YOU ONLY WANT A TORNADO IF YOU ALSO HAVE NEW AND IMPROVED GLASS-B-GONE, ONLY THREE EASY PAYMENTS OF $14.95!

Boomer The Cannon
Oct 27, 2011

Gotta see it live!


I DONT WANT IT FOR ME, RATHER 80 MILES NORTH SO WE ONLY SUFFER AT THE HANDS OF THE CINCINNATI REDS. GLAD TO HEAR YOU SURVIVED, TORNADOS ARE SCARY poo poo.

THE CLEVELAND INDIANS - MORE OXYCONTIN THAN OXY-CLEAN

tarlibone
Aug 1, 2014

Am I a... bad person?
AM I??




Fun Shoe
HERE IN THE ST. LOUIS AREA, WHERE THREE MAJOR SHIPPING RIVERS MEET, FREQUENT STORMS BRING MORE THAN ONE THREAT AT A TIME.

SO CALL NOW TO GET OUR SPECIAL SUMMER THUNDERSTORM! EACH THUNDERSTORM COMES WITH A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF SURPRISE LIGHTNING, FREE OF CHARGE! HATE YOUR ELECTRONICS? LOVE HOUSE FIRES? GET YOUR THUNDERSTORM TODAY!! ACT NOW, AND ENTER OUR TORNADO SWEEPSTAKES!! IT WILL LITERALLY SWEEP YOU AWAY WITH SHATTERED WOOD STAKES!!

AND IF YOU ORDER BEFORE THIS PROGRAM ENDS, WE'LL SEND YOU A COUPLE DOZEN FEET OF FLOODWATER, ENOUGH TO LAST FOR WEEKS!! CALL TODAY!!

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast

tarlibone posted:

HERE IN THE ST. LOUIS AREA, WHERE THREE MAJOR SHIPPING RIVERS MEET, FREQUENT STORMS BRING MORE THAN ONE THREAT AT A TIME.

SO CALL NOW TO GET OUR SPECIAL SUMMER THUNDERSTORM! EACH THUNDERSTORM COMES WITH A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF SURPRISE LIGHTNING, FREE OF CHARGE! HATE YOUR ELECTRONICS? LOVE HOUSE FIRES? GET YOUR THUNDERSTORM TODAY!! ACT NOW, AND ENTER OUR TORNADO SWEEPSTAKES!! IT WILL LITERALLY SWEEP YOU AWAY WITH SHATTERED WOOD STAKES!!

AND IF YOU ORDER BEFORE THIS PROGRAM ENDS, WE'LL SEND YOU A COUPLE DOZEN FEET OF FLOODWATER, ENOUGH TO LAST FOR WEEKS!! CALL TODAY!!

WE HAVE SUCH AWESOME SOCIAL EVENTS AS ALL-SCHOOL BUS DEMOLITION DERBIES AND JESUS VERSUS EASTER BUNNY BOXING MATCHES TO MAKE UP FOR IT. ALSO METH.

EDIT: WE'RE BACK FOLKS!

EDIT TWO: GUYS COME BACK IT'S LONELY HERE AND XAVIER'S GOOD.

Pancakes fucked around with this message at 04:07 on Jun 29, 2015

ROCK THE HOUSE M.D.
Oct 9, 2003

I've got a case of malt liquor stashed in the trunk, Mr. Marvin Gaye on the CD. We are gonna get all the way down.


PROFESSOR X IS IN YO HEAD, CUBBIES

Troy Queef
Jan 12, 2013




IT FIGURES I GET OFF WORK RIGHT AT THE TIME THE CARDINALS GAME STARTS BACK UP AGAIN, GUESS I'LL GO OUT, GET SOME BEER AND MUNCHIES AND WATCH BASEBALL (DON'T WORRY, TOMORROW'S AN OFF DAY--HELL, I WAS THINKING ABOUT GOING TO THE GAME TONIGHT, BUT CONSIDERING THEY'VE ALREADY STOPPED SELLING BEER IN THE 2ND INNING AND I'D RATHER MAKE MONEY THAN SPEND IT IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST)

ROCK THE HOUSE M.D.
Oct 9, 2003

I've got a case of malt liquor stashed in the trunk, Mr. Marvin Gaye on the CD. We are gonna get all the way down.


Troy Queef posted:

IT FIGURES I GET OFF WORK RIGHT AT THE TIME THE CARDINALS GAME STARTS BACK UP AGAIN, GUESS I'LL GO OUT, GET SOME BEER AND MUNCHIES AND WATCH BASEBALL (DON'T WORRY, TOMORROW'S AN OFF DAY--HELL, I WAS THINKING ABOUT GOING TO THE GAME TONIGHT, BUT CONSIDERING THEY'VE ALREADY STOPPED SELLING BEER IN THE 2ND INNING AND I'D RATHER MAKE MONEY THAN SPEND IT IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST)

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

SCORE SOME RUNS ASSHOLES

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

THATS ONE

Troy Queef
Jan 12, 2013




Scob posted:

SCORE SOME RUNS ASSHOLES

JASON HEYWARD HAS ANSWERED YOU

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast
J-HEY IS GOOD AT BASEBALL BUT IS PLAYING HIMSELF OUT OF OUR PRICE RANGE.

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

LOL THATS TWO

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT OUR SPECIAL ON DOUBLES THIS INNING!

R.D. Mangles
Jan 10, 2004


BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

Rand alPaul
Feb 3, 2010

by Nyc_Tattoo
SHOULD HAVE TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF THE SPECIAL J-HEY OFFER WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE.

NOW YOU'LL HAVE TO JUST RELY ON YOUR COMPENSATION PICK BEING A MVP-CALIBER PLAYER IN 2-3 YEARS.

Rand alPaul
Feb 3, 2010

by Nyc_Tattoo

R.D. Mangles posted:

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

DEUCES ARE WILD HERE IN ST LOUIS AS WE REACH THE MIDNIGHT HOUR ON THE EAST COAST

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast
PITCH TO PERALTA, THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

PITCH TO YADI, THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

PITCH TO WONG, YOU BETTER BELIEVE THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

WHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Mike_V
Jul 31, 2004

3/18/2023: Day of the Dorks
HOW ABOUT YOU IDIOTS STOP RUNNING INTO OUTS EVERY GAME?

Mike_V
Jul 31, 2004

3/18/2023: Day of the Dorks
GUESS MARTINEZ HAS SOME NEW PORN WAITING AT HOME TO WATCH

R.D. Mangles
Jan 10, 2004


gently caress THE CARDINALS THEY ARE THE BASEBALL INCARNATION OF ALL THAT IS EVIL gently caress THEM THEY ARE BULLSHIT

tarlibone
Aug 1, 2014

Am I a... bad person?
AM I??




Fun Shoe

Scob posted:

DEUCES ARE WILD HERE IN ST LOUIS AS WE REACH THE MIDNIGHT HOUR ON THE EAST COAST

GOOD GOD, I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY SHANNONITE AROUND HERE. I LOVE DEUCES WILD AND EVEN MARK IT ON MY SCORECARDS.



Pancakes posted:

PITCH TO PERALTA, THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

PITCH TO YADI, THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

PITCH TO WONG, YOU BETTER BELIEVE THAT'S A DOUBLIN'

POST OF THE THREAD!

Popete
Oct 6, 2009

This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs

Grimey Drawer
CURT SCHILLING ACTUALLY SAID SOMETHING INTERESTING WHEN TALKING ABOUT ROTATIONAL HITTING AND BAT SPEED. ESPN STILL SUCKS.

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast
GUYS I FORGET: WHO WAS IT WHO CALLED MOTTE HEFFALUMP FACE?

Scob
Jul 17, 2005

CARDS GOOD. BURN IN HELL BILLY MAYS.

Pancakes
May 21, 2001

Crypto-Rump Roast
BILLY MAYS HERE ENCOURAGING YOU TO HAIL SATAN AND EMBRACE THE BIRDS ON THE BAT

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tarlibone
Aug 1, 2014

Am I a... bad person?
AM I??




Fun Shoe
CARDINALS WIN!!

THE JUPITER JACK IS A USEFUL DEVICE THAT SAVES LIVES AND MAKES CANDY TASTE BETTER. MIGHTY PUTTY IS A TUBE OF MONSTER FECES THAT SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN EGGS WHEN YOU KNEAD IT, AND YOUR HANDS SMELL LIKE THE CUBS FOR DAYS AFTERWARDS NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WASH THEM.

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