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DeusExMachinima
Sep 2, 2012

:siren:This poster loves police brutality, but only when its against minorities!:siren:

Put this loser on ignore immediately!
Every year millions of Americans fall victim to our gum industrial complex. If you disagree with this statement you're a fascist who is arguing in bad faith. Anyway just yesterday I was coming home from work and got a huge wad of chewed up gum stuck on my shoe. It tasted like classic bubblegum when I tried it. poo poo was gross, who even buys that flavor anymore right? So obviously since this thing pissed me off it deserves national attention via a dying comedy forum.

Here's what we do:

Strict licensing for all gum purchasers: Your local PD takes a saliva swab and keeps it for their records. Then they give you a license that allows you to buy gum. Find a piece of gum thrown away on the sidewalk? Pick it up, bring it in for DNA testing, and whoever did it well you're gonna get rekt m8.

Black market gum trade: won't be a problem after we institute life sentencing for illict gum purchases.

Discuss.

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Fojar38
Sep 2, 2011


Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia


also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->
im gay

GlennFinito
Oct 15, 2013
Obama is coming for our gums!

Bel Shazar
Sep 14, 2012

DeusExMachinima posted:

Every year millions of Americans fall victim to our gum industrial complex. If you disagree with this statement you're a fascist who is arguing in bad faith. Anyway just yesterday I was coming home from work and got a huge wad of chewed up gum stuck on my shoe.

Show me on this doll where the Chewlies Gum rep touched you.

Angepain
Jul 13, 2012

what keeps happening to my clothes
If we criminalise gum then only criminals will have gum. With their minty fresh breath we will be powerless to compete with them on the dating scene, and after a couple of generations only criminals will have reproduced and we will be living in a world genetically predisposed to criminality. is that what you want you monster

Woof Blitzer
Dec 29, 2012

[-]
Gum is illegal in Singapore except if you have a prescription. Food for thought.

DOCTOR ZIMBARDO
May 8, 2006
Yea Singapore seems a model for gum control. Pretty effective regime to cut down on this harmful and annoying product.

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal
Also random urine tests at airports, capital punishment for drugs, no duty-free tobacco, pornography, publications by the Jehovah’s Witnesses, furry handcuffs, Malaysian newspapers, homosexual activity, or criticizing the government.

Sounds like a cool place and not a dystopic prohibitionist shitheap.

I hope their president steps in some gum and has to spend hours scraping it off his jackboot.

Woof Blitzer
Dec 29, 2012

[-]
Gum license? Why don't you "chew" on that haha

Woof Blitzer
Dec 29, 2012

[-]

Guavanaut posted:

Also random urine tests at airports, capital punishment for drugs, no duty-free tobacco, pornography, publications by the Jehovah’s Witnesses, furry handcuffs, Malaysian newspapers, homosexual activity, or criticizing the government.

Sounds like a cool place and not a dystopic prohibitionist shitheap.

Uh this is a gum thread, dumbass. Fly away troll :rolleyes:

breadshaped
Apr 1, 2010


Soiled Meat
The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gum is a good guy with a gum.



They can set an example :(

Rent-A-Cop
Oct 15, 2004

I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

is there special gum for gays y/n?

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

Equine Don posted:

Uh this is a gum thread, dumbass. Fly away troll :rolleyes:
None of it would be allowed to happen if their citizens had gum.

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rudatron
May 31, 2011

by Fluffdaddy
Politicians are in the pockets of Big Gum/Confectionary-Industrial-Complex, so a gum ban will never happen, even if it should.

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