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Alan Smithee
Jan 4, 2005


A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...
kewlbiens i like money give me money

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KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Nooner posted:

I want to drink mad tequila and cervezas and also eat some tacos help

mix all of these things into a beefy boozy slurry using a blender then chug it, you will no longer want to eat/drink these things for the rest of your life

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

This Jacket Is Me posted:

SSDI is slated to run out in 2016 and there's a good chance that my flimsy laywer-greased eligability will be revoked. How will I continue to post on these elite troll-free forui when my monthly is cut by 30% (certain) or 100% (likely)?

as long as you follow the rules and don't get banned you don't have to pay any additional money to post on these forums, invest in avatar now while you still can if that's important to you

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Shirley Crabtree posted:

my willy fell off

staple it back on, if the skin is too gangrenous where it detached put it on the other way around and use your foreskin as a diy graft

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

That Robot posted:

i want to eat god

convert to kemetism and eat a mummy

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

December Octopodes posted:

i taste bile in my throat from self loathing, it's not as bad as it was, but not very pleasant

brush your teeth, it will freshen your breath and boost your confidence

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

lonesomedwarf posted:

i want t ofuck, why cant i gently caress

jerk off every time you want to gently caress for 20 minutes of relief

as for why you can't gently caress i'm sorry but this thread is for solutions not answers

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Alan Smithee posted:

kewlbiens i like money give me money

i'm not sure i understand, is liking money causing you problems?

psyopmonkey2
Mar 10, 2015

by Ralp
Do you know how much wood chucks chuck?

Like an actual amount?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

psyopmonkey2 posted:

Do you know how much wood chucks chuck?

Like an actual amount?

i don't believe that pondering this is an actual problem in your life

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
How do i get people in real life to stop constantly want to hang out with me? I've tried being an rear end in a top hat but it doesn't really work, and seems to have the opposite effect. Everyone wants to be my BFF and hang out all the time and it's tiring. Should I just change my name and move out of the country?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Poetic Justice posted:

How do i get people in real life to stop constantly want to hang out with me? I've tried being an rear end in a top hat but it doesn't really work, and seems to have the opposite effect. Everyone wants to be my BFF and hang out all the time and it's tiring. Should I just change my name and move out of the country?

don't cover your mouth when you cough, make sure you cough with frequency and gusto

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005

KewlBiens posted:

dont' cover your mouth when you cough, make sure to cough with frequency and gusto

that's damned good advice, thank you!

my kinda ape
Sep 15, 2008

Everything's gonna be A-OK
Oven Wrangler
kewlbiens I really want a lady to suck my dick but the only girl I hosed from tinder was way more effort than I'm willing to put in again, what should I do?

Verily I Shat
May 24, 2015

by Smythe
When's father coming home?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

ghetto wormhole posted:

kewlbiens I really want a lady to suck my dick but the only girl I hosed from tinder was way more effort than I'm willing to put in again, what should I do?

any effeminate gay man will be more than happy to suck your dick with very little provocation, put a wig on him, close your eyes, enjoy the ride

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Verily I Shat posted:

When's father coming home?

when you least expect him to

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax
this thread is now also for general life advice and deep psychological analysis

psyopmonkey2
Mar 10, 2015

by Ralp
Ive got a korean phone.

I cant find the camera shutter .ogg files.

Its not the /system/media/ui/shutter_sound.ogg file.

Where are they?

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

kewlbiens what if the general solution to the halting problem has been predestined

Batterypowered7
Aug 8, 2009

The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

I just graduated and can't find a job. Please advise.

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

psyopmonkey2 posted:

Ive got a korean phone.

I cant find the camera shutter .ogg files.

Its not the /system/media/ui/shutter_sound.ogg file.

Where are they?

correct me if i'm wrong but are you trying to delete or alter the file so that nobody notices when you surreptitiously photograph girls' butts in public?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

chaosbreather posted:

kewlbiens what if the general solution to the halting problem has been predestined

if you really think about it isn't any and everything that happens predestined?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Batterypowered7 posted:

I just graduated and can't find a job. Please advise.

get into multilevel marketing

Batterypowered7
Aug 8, 2009

The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

KewlBiens posted:

get into multilevel marketing

I need the job to pay for the multilevel marketing.

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

Batterypowered7 posted:

I need the job to pay for the multilevel marketing.

not if you start your own multilevel marketing company

psyopmonkey2
Mar 10, 2015

by Ralp

KewlBiens posted:

correct me if i'm wrong but are you trying to delete or alter the file so that nobody notices when you surreptitiously photograph girls' butts in public?

Thats why the koreans have the law to force shutter tones on all phones.

But no, I just dont like it.

I take pictures of food, cats, and my face.

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

FUCK YOU HITLER
STALINGRAD
ROFLMFAO
I played chat roulette and actually paired up with Stephen Hawking. He showed me his cock

Now I can't get the image out of my head. How do I get it out?

KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

psyopmonkey2 posted:

Thats why the koreans have the law to force shutter tones on all phones.

But no, I just dont like it.

I take pictures of food, cats, and my face.

disassemble your phone and disconnect the speaker

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KewlBiens
Nov 21, 2007

by Lowtax

SirEvelynTremble posted:

I played chat roulette and actually paired up with Stephen Hawking. He showed me his cock

Now I can't get the image out of my head. How do I get it out?

keep looking at penises until they all blend together and you can't tell them apart anymore

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