big data

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > big data

pram: Jun 10, 2001

there was a person in Yospos who once said: when companies are going to need their Big Data .. they will look for Librarians to do this. this was his justification for getting a Masters of Library Science. lol. haha.

lol post yuour big data stories

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:02

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 05:27

Last Chance: Dec 31, 2004

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:03

Triglav: Jun 2, 2007; IT IS HARAAM TO SEND SMILEY FACES THROUGH THE INTERNET

💩

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:04

suffix: Jul 27, 2013; Wheeee!

sounds like a cool job
imagine sitting in the data centre all day knowing where everything is, and when someone comes asking where to find something you angrily shush them

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:11

pram: Jun 10, 2001

suffix posted:

sounds like a cool job
imagine sitting in the data centre all day knowing where everything is, and when someone comes asking where to find something you angrily shush them

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:12

N.Z.'s Champion: Jun 8, 2003; Yam Slacker

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 03:12

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 04:10

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

drat new emptyquote button is savage gj valeyard

# ? Aug 11, 2015 04:10

Cold on a Cob: Feb 6, 2006; i've seen so much, i'm going blind
and i'm brain dead virtually; College Slice

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 04:12

Linux Pirate: Apr 21, 2012

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

ive seen bigger

# ? Aug 11, 2015 04:54

Oae Ui: Oct 7, 2003; Let's be friends.

Last Chance posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

# ? Aug 11, 2015 05:36

pram: Jun 10, 2001

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 07:26

Joe 30330: Dec 20, 2007; "We have this notion that if you're poor, you cannot do it. Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."

As the audience reluctantly began to applaud during the silence, Biden tried to fix his remarks.

"Wealthy kids, black kids, Asian kids -- no, I really mean it." Biden said.

Last Chance posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

# ? Aug 11, 2015 07:29

maniacdevnull: Apr 18, 2007; FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

pram posted:

there was a person in Yospos who once said: when companies are going to need their Big Data .. they will look for Librarians to do this. this was his justification for getting a Masters of Library Science. lol. haha.

lol post yuour big data stories

I like librarians and I agree that they can easily find the albums I want to borrow

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:28

Cat Face Joe: Feb 20, 2005; goth vegan crossfit mom who vapes

reams and reams of paper are the computers of the future so that poaster was right

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:36

A Wheezy Steampunk: Jul 16, 2006; High School Grads Eligible!

pram posted:

there was a person in Yospos who once said: when companies are going to need their Big Data .. they will look for Librarians to do this. this was his justification for getting a Masters of Library Science. lol. haha.

lol post yuour big data stories

agreed, it's really hilarious when computer nerds try to solve problems that librarians solved in the 1800s

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:47

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

Last Chance posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

came here to post this, didn't read the op

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:51

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

here is a big data story:

we hired a Hadoop expert and 80% of what he does is tell people to stop being loving stupid and trying to use Hadoop because they should be using regular SQL. he literally has a presentation he just sends to them saying "you are wrong and your ideas are bad and you should feel bad"

edit: the department he is in has an SQL db with a 24Tb table lol

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:52

Cold on a Cob: Feb 6, 2006; i've seen so much, i'm going blind
and i'm brain dead virtually; College Slice

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

here is a big data story:

we hired a Hadoop expert and 80% of what he does is tell people to stop being loving stupid and trying to use Hadoop because they should be using regular SQL. he literally has a presentation he just sends to them saying "you are wrong and your ideas are bad and you should feel bad"

edit: the department he is in has an SQL db with a 24Tb table lol

i like this guy

how much data is required to actually qualify as "big data" territory? petabytes? nothing i've never worked on, i know.

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:54

A Wheezy Steampunk: Jul 16, 2006; High School Grads Eligible!

Cold on a Cob posted:

i like this guy

how much data is required to actually qualify as "big data" territory? petabytes? nothing i've never worked on, i know.

https://www.chrisstucchio.com/blog/2013/hadoop_hatred.html

# ? Aug 11, 2015 13:57

akadajet: Sep 14, 2003

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

sigh indeed, that is clearly lore

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:01

NoneMoreNegative: Jul 20, 2000; GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN MASTER

shit wizard dad

Big Dada

...

Big Daddy

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:01

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

A Wheezy Steampunk posted:

agreed, it's really hilarious when computer nerds try to solve problems that librarians solved in the 1800s

was hoping u would show up itt

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:01

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

A Wheezy Steampunk posted:

https://www.chrisstucchio.com/blog/2013/hadoop_hatred.html

a good blog.

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:13

Cold on a Cob: Feb 6, 2006; i've seen so much, i'm going blind
and i'm brain dead virtually; College Slice

A Wheezy Steampunk posted:

https://www.chrisstucchio.com/blog/2013/hadoop_hatred.html

nice

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:17

compuserved: Mar 20, 2006; Nap Ghost

Cold on a Cob posted:

i like this guy

we have a guy who does this too, he's great

# ? Aug 11, 2015 14:43

fart simpson: Jul 2, 2005; DEATH TO AMERICA

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 15:19

triple sulk: Sep 17, 2014

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 15:27

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

idrk what big data is. thought you wanted to make the 1s and 0s as small as possible to fit as many of them as you could. makes no sense, mate.

# ? Aug 11, 2015 15:34

GameCube: Nov 21, 2006

Last Chance posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

i'm sad that this was the only good song on the album

# ? Aug 11, 2015 15:56

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

Last Chance posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8b4xYbEugo

this was a good video, too bad about the lovely song

# ? Aug 11, 2015 16:44

distortion park: Apr 25, 2011

Cold on a Cob posted:

i like this guy

how much data is required to actually qualify as "big data" territory? petabytes? nothing i've never worked on, i know.

More than fits in an excel workbook

# ? Aug 11, 2015 16:50

quiggy: Aug 7, 2010; [in Russian] Oof.

N.Z.'s Champion posted:

sigh

# ? Aug 11, 2015 16:52

maniacdevnull: Apr 18, 2007; FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

The Management posted:

this was a good video, too bad about the lovely song

Actually it's good

# ? Aug 11, 2015 16:53

GameCube: Nov 21, 2006

The Management posted:

this was a good video, too bad about the lovely song

welcome to my ignore list bitch

# ? Aug 11, 2015 17:00

Joe 30330: Dec 20, 2007; "We have this notion that if you're poor, you cannot do it. Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."

As the audience reluctantly began to applaud during the silence, Biden tried to fix his remarks.

"Wealthy kids, black kids, Asian kids -- no, I really mean it." Biden said.

As a Millennial I posted:

i'm sad that this was the only good song on the album

And they don't even sing it themselves

# ? Aug 11, 2015 17:18

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 05:27

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

indigi posted:

idrk what big data is. thought you wanted to make the 1s and 0s as small as possible to fit as many of them as you could. makes no sense, mate.

use smaller fonts to optimize you're disk space

# ? Aug 11, 2015 19:53

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > big data