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numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

ethanol posted:

im getting really sick of your poo poo
close your dumb thread then idiot

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Matey
Mar 28, 2008

eat food

ethanol posted:

im getting really sick of your poo poo

you and me both brother

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

numberoneposter posted:

its sunday but yes i cant confirm she was a nursing student and i can only remember her last name (dobson???)

edit: i live in vic

u are a lucky man


its gods own country

one of these damned days i will go to victoria and take a cute girl to tofino and just do drugs and drink and gently caress and not leave until im thrown out of the bed and breakfast for throwing up on the drapes

Robbie Fowler
May 31, 2011
lol dumb oval office

BLARGHLE
Oct 2, 2013

But I want something good
to die for
To make it beautiful to live.
Yams Fan
Keep biking, but also try not to spend all of your non-biking time sitting on your rear end. Go to the gym afterward, or something.

H.H
Oct 24, 2006

August is the Cruelest Month
eat. less. food.
it's really not that hard, op.

use this, then eat less calories a day than what's indicated in the calculator


HTH

Yolomon Wayne
Jun 10, 2014

You call it "The Big Bang", but what really happened is
Grimey Drawer
Take that bike to an incline threadmill.

basement jihadist
Oct 3, 2002

increase cum intake at least 50% and hit the gym homo

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
replace all your nutrient intake with Soylent

To be fair...
Feb 3, 2006
Film Producer
OP, how many apples did you eat? That's probably your problem.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy

Amnomia posted:

OP your probably one of those noob b*tches that downshifts all the way going up a hill and looks like a noob f*ggot pedaling a million rpm yet literally travels slower than a small child crawling. noob

Ha-ha yeah what an idiot for exploiting mechanical advantage. Now if you'll excuse me I have to get back to my fixie, I'm late for a crying party.

ArmedZombie
Jun 6, 2004

ethanol posted:

just lol if you wear that spandex poo poo while you bike

it cradles my balls just right otherwise they flop all around

never do a sport without spandex op

Amnomia
Jun 12, 2003

notZaar posted:

Ha-ha yeah what an idiot for exploiting mechanical advantage. Now if you'll excuse me I have to get back to my fixie, I'm late for a crying party.

ur too weak if u sit down going up hills. u must learn to harness the power of ur gastrocnemius

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
When I want to get strong, I go to the gym and squat. I'm not going to overtorque my sprockets again doing stupid poo poo like climbing hills in high gear.

Amnomia
Jun 12, 2003

while it is true (and i concur), "squats" may be sufficient to procure a gastrocnemius of acceptable proportions, consider this: how about.

it is only with a bicycle's full range of motion can one's soleus truly reach the magnitude necessary to attract a woman of only the finest caliber. QED

ps if ur bike breaks down climbing hills may i suggest upgrading from ur $99 huffy k-mart special lmao (my advice craigslist XD)

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
OP go to the gym

find the largest buffest bro

take a 5 pound barbell and throw it down between him during a set staring without breaking off your line of sight

this will signal a duel to the death

defeat him, eat his still beating heart and turn on this song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rhl5K0mTSKY

you now have the essence of the bro

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
or suck a dick

both provide the essence of a bro

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014

op are you still fat

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014

op do you find this woman sexy? does she make your wang increase in volume



would you stick your dick into her bellybutton

Fansy
Feb 26, 2013

I GAVE LOWTAX COOKIE MONEY TO CHANGE YOUR STUPID AVATAR GO FUCK YOURSELF DUDE
Grimey Drawer
op,

20 miles of biking is ~1000 calories if you're going kinda fast (16-18 mph).

I don't know what else you eat/drink, but keep in mind that each beer is like ~200 calories.

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014

op weight training increases your metabolic rate the most

so if you move from somethingawful.com forums to bodybuilding.com forums then you'll be able to down that 6 pack every night with zero weight gain. hell you may even lose weight!!!11

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW

Pastor Perineum posted:

op weight training increases your metabolic rate the most

so if you move from somethingawful.com forums to bodybuilding.com forums then you'll be able to down that 6 pack every night with zero weight gain. hell you may even lose weight!!!11

You would need to gain close to 60 pounds of muscle to increase your metabolism enough to off set a six pack of beer a day.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
drink vodka

its more efficient

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014

Hobohemian posted:

You would need to gain close to 60 pounds of muscle to increase your metabolism enough to off set a six pack of beer a day.

reading a brah thread in bodybuilding.com while jiggling a shakeweight should be plenty

extra stout
Feb 24, 2005

ISILDUR's ERR

ethanol posted:

i go faster than everybody else passing everybody doing 20 miles 4 miles up hill and i am still skinny fat plz help

you spelled biting wrong in the thread title

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



op when i started working out i rationed myself to 7 drinks a week and switched to liquor

i've been going at it for 5 weeks and i've lost 20 pounds as of today :unsmith:

toggle
Nov 7, 2005

Top City Homo posted:

my balls have a nice musk after a good lift

lift weights do steroids opp


be alpha

Your balls might stink but they are small because of the steroids :laugh:

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

toggle posted:

Your balls might stink but they are small because of the steroids :laugh:

It's a perfect balance of musk to ball circumference

Would not work with big balls

Jabronie
Jun 4, 2011

In an investigation, details matter.

Top City Homo posted:

OP go to the gym

find the largest buffest bro

take a 5 pound barbell and throw it down between him during a set staring without breaking off your line of sight

this will signal a duel to the death

defeat him, eat his still beating heart and turn on this song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rhl5K0mTSKY

you now have the essence of the bro

hoyl poo poo that video owns. gently caress off dumpy wife

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

Jabronie posted:

hoyl poo poo that video owns. gently caress off dumpy wife

it is the official song of the swole thread

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Hot Cosby
Sep 23, 2015

by Nyc_Tattoo

Pastor Perineum posted:

op do you find this woman sexy? does she make your wang increase in volume



would you stick your dick into her bellybutton

not op but any hole or reasonable facsimile of on her would work for me

op im assuming your not a weak bitch and keeping it in the in 52 tooth up front and the 3 tooth in back?

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