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Un chien andalou
Oct 22, 2008

The pipe is leaking
millenials are leading the charge in self-concious fecal concealment

https://broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/the-perils-of-pooping-while-dating?utm_source=vicefbca

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Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
its not that I really scared of poopin in front of her

its just my poopin face is the same as my vinegar strokes

I feel that I would be sending mixed message, you know op?

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
I pooped on your mom last night, she didn't mind

Un chien andalou
Oct 22, 2008

The pipe is leaking

Snatch Duster posted:

its not that I really scared of poopin in front of her

its just my poopin face is the same as my vinegar strokes

I feel that I would be sending mixed message, you know op?

perfect segway into poop fetish. Bam!

BigBoss
Jan 26, 2012

by Lowtax
Huh. No poo poo .

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot
Millenials are useless trash so no surprise.

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Un chien andalou posted:

perfect segway into poop fetish. Bam!

not really, my poops are not mush piles or anything fun to play with

just really big and hard to pass logs that takes 3 days to make

Admiral_eX_laX
Jul 8, 2009

Historically Inaccurate
if you can take a dump in the same bathroom that your SO is taking a shower in, then you have truly bonded.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

once i was at a SO's house and i had to poop reall. bad and i said that i was really embarrassed but i had to use her toilet for pooping and that i was worried about the smell. but it worked out alright i sprayed a lot of air smell stuff to cover it ip and she said she couldnt smell it so i felt relieved physically and emotionally an dit was a good feeling all around

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

it brought us closer toget her and it was sort of like that part in rocky where he ran up the stairs but instead it was mainly focused on poop but i did feel stronger emotionally afterwards. then she pissed on me and started dating some other dude i dont think these events were related

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


I'm only scared of seeing my SO poop.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

just watned to mention that the pooping and the pissing thing didnt happen at the same time or even the same day. that would be strange and i wouldnt want anyone here to think there was anythign strange about me. okay thanks

Un chien andalou
Oct 22, 2008

The pipe is leaking

Admiral_eX_laX posted:

if you can take a dump in the same bathroom that your SO is taking a shower in, then you have truly bonded.

this was never a problem but I hated smelling my ex's dumps when I got out of the shower

Snatch Duster
Feb 20, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

lonesomedwarf posted:

just watned to mention that the pooping and the pissing thing didnt happen at the same time or even the same day. that would be strange and i wouldnt want anyone here to think there was anythign strange about me. okay thanks

get a load of this weirdo

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
pissing is totally fine

but pooping is a sign your relationship is going downhill

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot

lonesomedwarf posted:

Then she pissed on me

So was it intentionally? Like she sat up and just peed on your face?

Ahundredbux
Oct 25, 2007

The right to bear arms
actually i just want some loving peace and quiet when I poo poo, op

Un chien andalou
Oct 22, 2008

The pipe is leaking

Moola posted:

pissing is totally fine

but pooping is a sign your relationship is going downhill

just try living in a one bathroom apt without it happening eventually. The impacted colon is not worth it

Basic Poster
May 11, 2015

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.

On Facebook
Wow
The entire staff is under 30 and have terrible names. Thanks OP, I will never again read vice more than I would consult hot topic for fashion advice.

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid

quote:

Mitchell, 24, Managing editor

I think one big thing is if you're having a one-night stand with someone or loving someone you're not close with and you're bottoming. Sometimes if the dick is too big, it will cause you to bleed, hemorrhage, or poo poo blood. If you didn't prepare to bottom (by "prepare" I mean FAST, like a monk), it will make poop just come out on his dick as you're loving. This may just be a sliver of poop, but it can also be a literal turd. (This has happened to all gay men.)

The BIGGEST issue, though, is if bottoming causes you to poo poo blood: You kinda just have to poop in his bathroom the morning after. It's embarrassing, but it's what you have to go through. The best solution is to grab his cologne and spray it in the bathroom and turn on the shower so he can't hear. This typically works and is doable since clichés are true and gay guys own expensive cologne—or at least Paris Hilton perfume as a novelty.

i am not gay and i am glad of it

XMNN fucked around with this message at 18:01 on Nov 11, 2015

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid

quote:

Michael, 25, Male Feminist

I try to fart and stuff almost immediately in front of the person I'm dating, after we've established that we like each other. I feel like if you're farting and pooping, it makes people feel more at ease around you. And if they're not comfortable with your body and the weird smells it produces, then they're probably not right for you. You can't just stomp around farting and making GBS threads like an ogre, but if you're funny and cute about it—I often blame it on "big dogs running in" or whatever—it's endearing and makes things less stressful. There's nothing worse than having to poo poo for long periods of time!

ok that one has to be a joke

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec
I don't have a SO so I poop wherever I please.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

If you didn't have a date like this you have failed as a human being

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwcVJMvVWDA

mrhotdogvendor
May 28, 2006
very tired hispanic
"You can't just stomp around farting and making GBS threads like an ogre"

gently caress you for trying to tell me what I can and cannot do.

Don't oppress my butthole.

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Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord
Been with GF 6 years, brag about when we take real good ones. Pretty envious of some of the ones she takes TBQH.

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