The FBI now considers animal cruelty a Class A felony in all 50 states

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Is good, yeah?
	I don't like it. More big government getting into our personal lives
	I'm not comfortable with the FBI keeping a database like this because Ron Paul 2016
	If you have leather shoes but think torturing cats and dogs is wrong, you're a hypocrite
	dog dead. so what
	I agree with the felony charges for everything but the dogfucking
	I think this law is great and will do a lot of good to protect those that cannot protect themselves and will also help prevent future crimes from happening to more pets and even humans
	goku

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Microwaves Mom: Nov 8, 2015; by zen death robot

A misanthrope posted:

convert them to christianity an pray the gay away

well of course that too. anti-gay christian vegan cats.

# ? Jan 10, 2016 13:11

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 06:31

a misanthrope: Jun 21, 2010

Microwaves Mom posted:

well of course that too. anti-gay christian vegan cats.

i watched that every saturday after teenage mutant ninja turtles

# ? Jan 10, 2016 13:13

Microwaves Mom: Nov 8, 2015; by zen death robot

A misanthrope posted:

i watched that every saturday after teenage mutant ninja turtles

it was on after the mormon moles for me.

# ? Jan 10, 2016 13:27

Applewhite: Aug 16, 2014; by vyelkin; Nap Ghost

a starwar betamax posted:

Applewhite please repost the story about the shelf falling on a cow or whatever at bestbuy

Well, when I was working at Best Buy, we were doing a "cash cow" promotion where customers would be allowed to get their picture taken with a real cow if they pre-ordered the latest Assassin's Creed videogame. The cow had dollar sign glasses on and a top hat (because it was a "cash cow"). Unfortunately, the promotion was ill-conceived. Cows smell and also poo poo all the time. The paddock we'd set up in the videogame section got pretty foul after only a couple days because nobody wanted to clean it.
On the third day of the promotion, we had some bratty kid come in who pre-ordered the Assassin's Creed game and insisted he get his picture taken with him riding the cow ("Just like a cowboy" says the loving retard). Now, I was on cow duty that day and we were under no circumstances to allow customers to ride the cow, so I told the kid he couldn't. Of course, the spoiled little brat started raising hell about it and before I knew it I had his angry parents up in my face demanding to speak to the manager.
I tried to explain to them that we couldn't let customers ride the cow for liability reasons but they would hear none of it.
Anyway my idiot manager comes out and starts yelling at me too because God forbid he stand up to a customer. Long story short I get kicked off cow duty and the kid gets to ride the cow.
Well, it was a good thing I got kicked off of cow duty because I wasn't responsible for what happened next.
The kid starts digging his heels into the cow's sides and freaking it out, and it goes from docile Brahmin to 1,500lbs of panicked rodeo machine in two seconds flat. It busts out of its flimsy pressboard paddock and goes stampeding through the store, knocking over shelves and trampling the merchandise, meanwhile the screaming, bratty kid is still on its back somehow and his high-pitched caterwauling is just making the cow more and more frantic. It can't see very well because of its dollar sign glasses and ends up charging headlong into the TV department and headbutting the display wall with all the huge TVs.
The shock of its impact jars loose the big 90" "Razor edge" plasma screen TV directly overhead, and it drops down on the cow like a guillotine. *SPLUNTCH!*
Slices the cow's head clean off, bathing everyone in the TV section with blood especially the bratty kid on its back. The kid is howling, the parents are furious and the poor cow's head is still looking around and trying to moo with no lungs. The local papers had a field day.
My manager lost his job and I got a formal reprimand even though I had nothing to do with it.
The bratty kid was hospitalized for all kinds of cow STDs that he caught from swallowing a quart of cow blood. Serves him right, imo.
Meanwhile, guess who had to clean up all the blood from half a dozen TVs.
Yeah, me.
gently caress Best Buy.

# ? Jan 11, 2016 15:27

Lawrence Gilchrist: Mar 31, 2010

Applewhite posted:

Well, when I was working at Best Buy, we were doing a "cash cow" promotion where customers would be allowed to get their picture taken with a real cow if they pre-ordered the latest Assassin's Creed videogame. The cow had dollar sign glasses on and a top hat (because it was a "cash cow"). Unfortunately, the promotion was ill-conceived. Cows smell and also poo poo all the time. The paddock we'd set up in the videogame section got pretty foul after only a couple days because nobody wanted to clean it.
On the third day of the promotion, we had some bratty kid come in who pre-ordered the Assassin's Creed game and insisted he get his picture taken with him riding the cow ("Just like a cowboy" says the loving retard). Now, I was on cow duty that day and we were under no circumstances to allow customers to ride the cow, so I told the kid he couldn't. Of course, the spoiled little brat started raising hell about it and before I knew it I had his angry parents up in my face demanding to speak to the manager.
I tried to explain to them that we couldn't let customers ride the cow for liability reasons but they would hear none of it.
Anyway my idiot manager comes out and starts yelling at me too because God forbid he stand up to a customer. Long story short I get kicked off cow duty and the kid gets to ride the cow.
Well, it was a good thing I got kicked off of cow duty because I wasn't responsible for what happened next.
The kid starts digging his heels into the cow's sides and freaking it out, and it goes from docile Brahmin to 1,500lbs of panicked rodeo machine in two seconds flat. It busts out of its flimsy pressboard paddock and goes stampeding through the store, knocking over shelves and trampling the merchandise, meanwhile the screaming, bratty kid is still on its back somehow and his high-pitched caterwauling is just making the cow more and more frantic. It can't see very well because of its dollar sign glasses and ends up charging headlong into the TV department and headbutting the display wall with all the huge TVs.
The shock of its impact jars loose the big 90" "Razor edge" plasma screen TV directly overhead, and it drops down on the cow like a guillotine. *SPLUNTCH!*
Slices the cow's head clean off, bathing everyone in the TV section with blood especially the bratty kid on its back. The kid is howling, the parents are furious and the poor cow's head is still looking around and trying to moo with no lungs. The local papers had a field day.
My manager lost his job and I got a formal reprimand even though I had nothing to do with it.
The bratty kid was hospitalized for all kinds of cow STDs that he caught from swallowing a quart of cow blood. Serves him right, imo.
Meanwhile, guess who had to clean up all the blood from half a dozen TVs.
Yeah, me.
gently caress Best Buy.