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Do you have kids? If you have kids, divorce should be the most painful thing imaginable. At least it was for me. Though most people I have met that have divorced with children really don't know or give a gently caress what it does to kids because, well, most people are psychopathic, and chances are, you are too. However, if you do have kids, it's a different matter than if you don't. You will destroy him in every way because you are female and family courts hate males. Chances are, your favorite position is in the missionary position and you've never once thought of someone else during sex. Chances are, he has. Therefore, you will win. The thing about having an ex is that there is someone out there who you loved with all your heart. Who you told every secret to. Who knows every weakness you have. Who hates you. As insinuated by my previous sexual statement, though, and along with the things you have said, it's quite likely that you have never had a dirty thought. You've never stole a bubble gum in your life. You don't swear. You don't like it up the butt. Yet he, more than likely, has many failings, drugs, affairs, kinks, embarrassing moments, enemies, etc. Therefore, when you divorce, you will destroy him. You'll be telling his mom about that time he asked you to go to a swinger club. You'll tell his boss he is a porn addict. You'll tell his future finance he's secretly gay. I'd say you'd have sex with all his friends, who'd bang you in a heartbeat, while none of your friends would touch him with a ten foot pole, however, you'd never do anything like that because you are goody two shoes. If you do have kids, Uncle Sam will make him pay you to take them away from him. It won't matter if you cheat on him and told his kids to call another man daddy or anything. Uncle Sam is absolutely convinced that every father should pay their ex to take his kids away and give them to some other rear end in a top hat, even if you do that before the divorce. For a modern woman, divorce is the best damned government program there ever was. If you have sisters or daughters, you should recommend they start planning for divorce early. The best path is to marry someone mildly successful, have a bunch of kids with him, gently caress his boss, then divorce in order to have the (ex) husband pay them to give his kids to his boss, who will fire him. Any proper divorce plan should involve the wife not getting a job or contributing anything meaningful to the marriage. The more the husband takes care of her during the marriage, the more alimony he will owe her while she is living with his boss who fired him who she started loving while they are married. Now in your case, though, even though you took care of him more than he took care of you, you won't have to give him any alimony. Family courts hate men. If you're a woman, you get more the more you were taken care of. but if you're a man you will only get share in accordance with what you should be able to produce. So if you did nothing for him during the marriage you'd be a poor housewife who he needs to take care of forever. But if he did nothing for you and you took care of him, the court will just say he is capable of earning millions and if he hasn't it's because he is a loser. Basically, you won't have to give him poo poo. Now if you have sons and brothers, just slice off their genitilia and give them a brochure to a monastery. It's the only way to survive. Marriage is death. Your husband is about to find that out. He'll be owing you money for the rest of his life and give you everything he ever had even though you make more money than he does and are more successful than he is. Anyway, you've decided you don't like him anymore. You are going to divorce. You are about to go through a wonderful journey in which you are about to find out that you are an omnipotent goddess. Your husband's soul is going to be ripped out of his body and poo poo on. He'll probably commit suicide, frankly. Don't believe his threats. They are a product of him actually believing that he is a human being and actually has some sort of hope for his future. However, he is only a male. Not a human. North American Grey Wolves have a higher status in the eyes of the law than he does. Deep down inside he may suspect the fact that his life is about to be over in any meaningful sense, and his threats are a deluded result of his belief that he has options and hope. The universe itself is designed to protect you from him. You, however, are free to abuse him in every way imaginable and nobody will give a poo poo. Isn't SA for games and stuff? I am trying to figure these forums out.
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May 8, 2016 05:16
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 15:22 |
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im permabanned poster niggerstomper58. i first started reading fyad when i was about 12. by 14 i got really obsessed with the concept of “irony” and tried to channel it constantly, until my thought process got really bizarre and i would repeat things like “friend of the family balls” and “i love making GBS threads inside friend of the family assholes” in my head for hours, and i would get really paranoid, start seeing things in the corners of my eyes etc, basically prodromal schizophrenia. im now on antipsychotics. i always wondered what the kind of “ironic” style of fyad humor was all about; i think it’s the unconscious leaking in to the conscious, what jungian theory considered to be the cause of schizophrenic and schizotypal syptoms. i would advise all people who “get” fyad to be careful because that likely means you have a predisposition to a mental illness. peace
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May 8, 2016 05:17
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I've gone into the outside world to re-observe society. The sign language of emotion I once knew has been replaced by a matrix of interrelated equations. Lines of force twist and elongate between people, objects, institutions, ideas. The individuals are tragically like marionettes, independently animate but bound by a web they choose not to see; they could resist if they wished, but so few of them do. At the moment I'm sitting at a bar. Three stools to my right sits a man, familiar with this type of establishment, who looks around and notices a couple in a dark corner booth. He smiles, motions for the bartender to come over, and leans forward to speak confidentially about the couple. I don't need to listen to know what he's saying. He's lying to the bartender, easily, extemporaneously. A compulsive liar, not out of a desire for a life more exciting than his own, but to revel in his facility for deceiving others. He knows the bartender is detached, merely affecting interest -- which is true -- but he knows the bartender is still fooled -- which is also true. My sensitivity to the body language of others has increased to the point that I can make these observations without sight or sound: I can smell the pheromones exuded by his skin. To an extent, my muscles can even detect the tension within his, perhaps by their electric field. These channels can't convey precise information, but the impressions I receive provide ample basis for extrapolation; they add texture to the web. Normal humans may detect these emanations subliminally. I'll work on becoming more attuned to them; then perhaps I can try consciously controlling my own expressions.
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May 8, 2016 05:19
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World of Warcraft In the futures, people were run out of Internet, so they had to make ration of internet! But on day, all the nerds went to the internet maschine, to make a stealing from the internet so they could make a play World of Warcraft all the time! The police heard of their crimes with their megaphone. The nerds went back to their computers and made a playing on warcrafts. They wore many goggles and made that Star Trek sign with their hands at each other. Suddenly, the police burst into the rom. “YOU SHALL NOT MAKE A STEALING FROM THE INTERNET!” yell police, and they make a shooting at the nerds. “You shall no shoot us!” they make a shouting, and they hide behind the internet. The police bullets shot the internet! “BUT THIS WAS THE LAST INTERNETS WE HAD!!!!!!!!!!” scream police, and the internet exploded and no more internets. Futurama Bender made a playing with his robotics. Fry went into the rom and tryed to insert a Floppy Disk into Bender! “YOU SHALL NOT INSERT FLOPPY DISK!” shout Bender, and he ran away with his robotics. Fry was very annoy at Benders rejection of the Disk! “I SHALL NOT LISTEN TO YOU HUMANS!” shout Bender, and he flew out of the window with his robotics. “Oh no!” shout Zoidberg, “NOW I CAN’T HAVE ROBOTICS!” Everyone was sad at a no robotics. Suddenly, Bender danubed back through the window. “I have decided to make you all into robots!” say Bender, as some robots also danubed to the window and started zapping everyone into robots. “Of the robots making!” laugh Bender, as transform the binary data. Ninja Turtles One day, the turtles wanted to ninja, but they were too slow to ninja. “Your turtles are too slow!” shout Rat, “You cannot ninja!”. But suddenly people outside were dump pollution in the sewer! “A pollution sewer!” shout the turtles, and they try to run away. But they were too slow to make runnings! The acid of pollution made a goo of all turtles! Rat had to use its rat powers to climb up the ceiling, but then the people came back and dumped the pollution on the ceiling. “No!” shout Rat as many acids make a goo on the rat, and not a rat.
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May 8, 2016 05:35
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Responding under a throwaway. I've been involved in anti-racist/anti-fascist work, either directly or on the periphery, for about ten years at this point. This takes many forms, from street confrontations with fascists, protests at book readings and other events, and also disrupting fascist conferences and similar. Anti-Racist Action is the organization that has developed the most tactical and strategic influence in this space, not by design, but by chance (and it largely doesn't exist anymore). Disrupting fascist meetings by denying them space by getting hotels to drop them is the bread and butter of any ARA chapter. It's the easiest thing to do, and most modern tumblerites aren't willing to get in the streets with a bandanna and a baseball bat, so it's what gets done now. And in fact, it's likely that this sort of thing happens because ARA activists got involved in more liberal groups, etc., and the tactics just trickled down. Personally, I have developed political differences with the "SJW" orthodoxy myself (though obviously in the other direction), and have seen the effects of this sort of attack applied on a social level. It has made my own work slightly more difficult, because I have to pick my comrades more carefully to ensure that they won't alienate me from my network. But this isn't a big deal for leftists, because there are already so many camps that are mutually oppositional that you'd need to do that already for some of your politics anyway. What's new in the last few years is having that extend away from your class alignment. (This is an answer to a question you didn't really ask, which is how the "SJW" community itself is affected by this, though it is what came to mind when I asked myself how I felt about it.) As far as this issue and other similar issues are concerned, I'm overjoyed that, as you put it, a climate of fear exists for fascists, misogynists, racists, and similar. I hope that this continues and only worsens for these people. I'm happy for many reasons. The first is that it has, as you've said, made privileged people afraid. I think this is only the beginning. Privilege creates safety, and as it is removed, I think the unsafety of the oppressed will in part come to the currently privileged classes. But if I could flip a switch and make every man feel the persistent, gnawing fear that a woman has of men, I would in a heartbeat. I wouldn't even consider whether the consequences were strategic, I would just do it. I'm also happy that these people are achieving real victories. This is nearly impossible to do in a post-reformist landscape, and so the people involved in getting this fascist kicked out of this conference will have a real victory under their belt where their friends who are campaigning against some law that will inevitably pass or for some reform that will inevitably never happen won't. I hope that these victories can motivate people into taking more action. Burnout is a huge problem in activism and successes stave it off. I would not say that I set out to defeat a "discourse-stifling" monster. The monsters I set out to defeat were patriarchy, capitalism, and white supremacy. These systems violently oppress, they don't "stifle discourse." In fact, they LOVE discourse! When people are discoursing, they aren't in the streets. I've seen so many promising movements hobbled by reformism that I'm glad the possibility no longer exists, though that isn't at all the fault of SJW-outrage (and is rather a consequence of the fact that the economy is in large part so perilous that nobody can afford the concessions that were previously won by reformists). So if discourse is permanently removed as a tactical and strategic option for future leftists, I'll consider it a victory. You might be unsurprised to find out that free speech is not valued on the left or among "SJW" groups. I suggest you research this further, because I can't communicate to you in a single hacker news comment why this is, or what theoretical basis it has.
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May 8, 2016 05:41
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My father drove up to Santa Barbara to meet me a few days later. The two of us went to have lunch at a restaurant in the Camino Real Marketplace, an area that I often frequented. When we sat down at our table, I saw a young couple sitting a few tables down the row. The sight of them enraged me to no end, especially because it was a dark-skinned Mexican guy dating a hot blonde white girl. I regarded it as a great insult to my dignity. How could an inferior Mexican guy be able to date a white blonde girl, while I was still suffering as a lonely virgin? I was ashamed to be in such an inferior position in front my father. When I saw the two of them kissing, I could barely contain my rage. I stood up in anger, and I was about to walk up to them and pour my glass of soda all over their heads. I probably would have, if father wasn’t there. I was seething with envious rage, and my father was there to watch it all. It was so humiliating. I wasn’t the son I wanted to present to my father. I should be the one with the hot blonde girl, making my father proud. Instead, my father had to watch me suffer in a pathetic position. Life is so cruel to me. When I said my farewell to father before he drove home, I felt absolutely miserable. I then went back to my room and sulked for hours. Another incident happened on the following day, near the same location. I went to the Starbucks at the Camino Real Marketplace by myself, like I usually did every morning. I ordered my coffee and sat down on one of their chairs to relax. A few moments later, when I looked up from my drink, I saw a young couple standing in line. The two of them were kissing passionately. The boy looked like an obnoxious punk; he was tall and wore baggy pants. The girl was a pretty blonde! They looked like they were in the throes of passionate sexual attraction to each other, rubbing their bodies together and tongue kissing in front of everyone. I was absolutely livid with envious hatred. When they left the store I followed them to their car and splashed my coffee all over them. The boy yelled at me and I quickly ran away in fear. I was panicking as I got into my car and drove off, shaking with rage-fueled excitement. I drove all the way to the Vons at the Fairview Plaza and spent three hours in my car trying to contain my tumultuous emotions. I had never struck back at my enemies before, and I felt a small sense of spiteful gratification for doing so. I hated them so much. Even though I splashed them with my coffee, he was still the winner. He was going home to have passionate heavenly sex with his beautiful girlfriend, and I was going home to my lonely room to sleep alone in my lonely bed. I had never felt so miserable and mistreated in my life. I cursed the world for condemning me to such suffering.
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May 8, 2016 05:46
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You may be asking yourself "What the gently caress is happening to GBS right now? What's up with this spam and word salad garbage? Who is this Dare character anyway?" Well friends, let's go down the rabbit hole. It all started with a man named Dare. Not too long ago Dare had a personal meltdown. You have probably seen it, or part of it. You may have even read some of his 300+ page manifesto that he wrote after being banned from Something Awful. The manifesto included some good gems, including accusing SA user "dad gay. so what" of being a female that goes by Coral; who has neo nazi family connections she used to take a hit out on Dare and his girlfriend. Obviously Dare was a very crazy person. Registering hundreds of accounts with credit card fraud he persistently spammed the forums with his word salad. He wrote pages and pages of conspiracy theories, claiming that many members of Something Awful (particularly the FYAD subforum) were also registered users on a different forum he frequented. While there may be a degree of truth to it he mostly just picked random Something Awful users out of a hat, assigned them a personality from his other forum, and assumed that we are an entire forum of rereg accounts made by his personal friends to troll and or gaslight him. Alex at some point got arrested, the charges are unclear but it appears to be assault or stalking his ex-gf. He posted bail and during this period is when his personal meltdown and manifesto writing began. As far as I know, that is the abridged version of the Dare saga. He may or may not be in jail right now (and probably is). Check out his manifesto for the full dose of crazy. Dare was obsessed with a game called Tribes. An FPS from the ancient era of the internet that essentially no one plays. In fact until this drama started I had no idea what Tribes even was. But as with most games Tribes has it's own forum - Tribal Wars. Tribal Wars is a degenerate shitstorm of a forum that caters to racist and sexist social rejects. They can hardly go 6 posts without bringing up the Jewish conspiracy or how much they hate black people. I suspect that most of these people have some degree of mental illness. Think FYAD, if FYAD was 100 times less funny and more racist . Here are some choice examples of the kind of posts you will find on the Tribal Wars forum.    (These images were screen capped from the "Hot girls in tight dresses" thread of all places) As you can see they are highly classy people with high brow opinions. This forum filled with shitheels is still deeply obsessed with their ancient game, Tribes. All of them also seem to have some personal vendetta against Something Awful, and a good deal of them are also Something Sensitive posters. From what I can tell they all thought of themselves as high ranking FYAD superstars and then eventually were trolled out of the forums into a life of bitter existence and shameful quarantine to the Tribal Wars forums. These days they are starting to become privy to the fact that their two decade old game is dated and lovely. Enter Midair. Midair is more or less a Tribes clone, updated for the modern era of gaming. Midair is essentially these people's second coming of Christ. If you say Midair louder than a whisper they will ejaculate on the spot. I will address why Midair is important later. But why is this relevant, and how is this connected to Something Awful? None of this really explains a real reason for our recent world salad spam. To understand why this has been happening to GBS in particular lately you must also know who "k8" is. k8, also known as Kasia, is one of the poo poo heel posters on the Tribal Wars forum, and Dare's former girlfriend. The one he claims is a crazy sociopath who got him in trouble in the first place. k8 is a raging slut who apparently has had sex with a good deal amount of Tribal War forum posters, and also I guess has a "really hot sister". k8 has stolen Dare's former account information, and is now using it under the guise of Dare. By doing this she creates a shield of crazy around herself, and puts a proxy between herself and the people she is endlessly harassing. I think the most remarkable thing about this is that someone has managed to replicate the ramblings of a schizo so perfectly. k8 also has a huge beef with the admin of Tribal Wars, Rayn. She has actively been posting under the guise of Rayn here at Something Awful. This is after she claimed to be Dare. She is playing the proxy long con here and trying to convince us that Rayn is behind pretending to be Dare in case anyone caught on that Dare wasn't really around.     k8 is also a raving lunatic. However, she does actually have a goal in mind. She hasn't lost it completely. k8 seems to somehow be connected to the development of the game Midair. She clings to hope that it will be finished soon and is doing everything in her power to generate attention for this lovely game as well as her Tribal War forum. Due to her ~high ranking status~ in the Tribes community she thinks the Midair devs give any semblance of a poo poo about what she thinks. Somehow her brain is connecting spam posting Something Awful with generating revenue for Midair. From what I can tell she thinks that every time someone clicks a link in GBS from one of her spam posts it increases revenue for Midair in some sort of "pay for click" advertising scheme. Her projected estimates are that she is receiving 20-50,000 clicks from Something Awful, and that Tribal Wars forum is on an equal footing as far as advertising revenue is concerned. She is concerned that Midair won't receive enough funding to get off the ground, and eventually her dreams of a new Tribes reboot will die.    So what does that mean for Something Awful posters? It means we are currently being spammed by a lunatic who thinks our attention is helping fund a lovely Tribes reboot. She is not the real Dare, and is using his mental breakdown from earlier to hide her true identity. Stop clicking her loving links, god knows what is attached to them. Stop responding to her lovely posts. I'm sending off an email to Kickstarter regarding the Midair fund. Hopefully they will take action against it for abusive advertising techniques. I think it would be pretty funny if this retard's spam posting in an effort to get her dream game off the ground is really its own downfall.  e: It's probably likely that it's Dare pretending to be k8, pretending to be Rayn, pretending to be himself. Dareception.
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May 8, 2016 05:51
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anyone remember that one TMNT video where she has sex with the turtles and goes down a flight of stairs while riding one then ends up giving oral to like krang's robot? Yeah i'd post that but its NSFW.
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May 8, 2016 06:11
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I was drinking with a buddy of mine at this dive bar on the other side of the city in a bad part of town and a couple of the regulars kept talking about the “sex maze” next door. I had never heard of anything like that before- so I asked. Apparently next door was this gay cruising club that took the form of a big maze. Even weirder: The club paid guys to dress up as a “sex minotaurs” and chase dudes around the maze. They kept joking that if you got caught you had to suck the minotaur's dick. When I heard all this my jaw dropped, it was the most insane thing I've ever heard and I am into some weird sex poo poo. We kept joking about it over the course of the night and the riffing eventually turned into talking about going in there. Once we got sufficiently drunk, it was decided. We went in. The lobby was really nondescript, but had a drab and kind of sinister quality to it. It looked like the waiting room for a doctor's office except there were no magazines and it looked it hadn't been cleaned in ages. There were even dim florescent lights overhead. There was a guy behind bulletproof glass to the side and straight ahead was a normal looking door with an electronic lock that we guessed was the entrance. We stumbled up to the counter and asked the guy how much to get in. He said because it was our first time it was free, but we had to sign some forms first. We were shocked that it was free, but also kind of happy that we didn't have to pay to get in since we were just doing this for the story. The forms looked like typical “don't sue us” bullshit and we signed pretty quickly. I had no idea what I was getting into when I signed those forms. The guy wasn't enthused with two giddy drunk straight guys trying to get into his “SECRET GAY MAZE.” He didn't seem annoyed exactly... just vacant. It was weird. When we finished signing he took the forms, looked them over and hit a button and we heard the door lock unclick. We took his silence as consent to go in. The first thing we noticed was how dark it was. It wasn't pitch black, but the only lighting was by way of a streak of glow in the dark red smears along the walls of the maze. The second thing we noticed was the screaming. It was loud, terrifying, and it never stopped. We immediately tried to go back but the door was locked. Then we heard the wail of the minotaur. It was a beastly thing. Definitely not something that could be made by a human being. What had previously been a joke was now very real and terrifying. Whatever we were involved with was more hosed up than we had imaged. We decided we needed to find a way out of the maze and fast. Every minute or so we heard the minotaur's cries getting closer. We kept running until we hit a dead end. We felt the minotaur before we heard him. We saw the dim outline of a huge, muscular naked man with the head of a bull as he approached us. We were scared out of our minds. He got close enough that we felt and heard his heavy animal breathing. We were able to make out that the bull head was just a cartoonish mask, which was even scarier. The only thing he had to do was make a gesture and we knew exactly what he wanted. We were going to have to suck his dick. And we did. It was terrifying. The screaming never stopped. When we finished he just grunted and walked away. We eventually found our way out of the maze and immediately called the cops. It turned out that the entire experience was planned out from the beginning and we agreed to it when we signed the forms. It's a way for super kinky gay men to pay for some kind of horrific sexual experience. The part where we sucked his dick was actually supposed to be the “climax” of the experience. It was traumatic for a while but we eventually decided it wasn't as big of a deal as we thought. We were looking for a story after all, it just turned out to be way crazier than we thought.
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May 8, 2016 06:17
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Hang on but for real can someone post that thing about the guy who had to go on heart meds after eating nothing but bacon grease and steaks for a month cause that's still my favorite
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May 8, 2016 06:19
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So yes, to momentarily borrow Yudkowsky fanboy terminology, I wear black robes. I am a practitioner of the Dark Arts. I rigorously manage my own thinking and purge myself of dangerous "unthinkable" thoughts -- "mindkill" myself -- on a regular basis. This is what you have to do to be a feminist anti-racist progressive, i.e. a social justice stormtrooper, You have to recognize that there is no neutral culture, neutrality is impossible, that culture is a cutthroat war of memes and that you have to commit to picking a side and setting yourself up as a neutral arbiter of memes is impossible and is a form of surrender. You have to constantly "check your privilege" and "unpack the knapsack" and all those other buzzwords. You need to understand that the only way to be "rational" in this world is to be irrational, that the only way to be "fair" is to pick the right side and fight for it. The people who genuinely win are the people who do this. The people who refuse to do this are the ones who sit on the sidelines and never even lose because they aren't really playing. I've said before that I'm amazed at Yudkowsky actually coming out and saying this at one point -- that his movement is really good at getting people to make propositional statements that he judges to be "rational" but really bad at, like, actually effectively making rational decisions. He likens this to "a dojo that teaches you how to punch rather than kick", whereas I think a better analogy would be "a dojo that teaches you how to spectate rather than fight".
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May 8, 2016 08:01
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 15:22 |
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Oh cool one of those threads where everyone posts poo poo that absolutely nobody reads. PYF but "ironic".
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May 8, 2016 08:03
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