Why did the puppy fall down the stairs?

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Dignity Van Houten: Jul 28, 2006; abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P

drat it we need closure to this joke

*smashes the 5 key on keyboard*

*does not know how dead gay forums work*

# ? Aug 24, 2016 21:05

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 00:47

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

JiveHonky posted:

(rated this thread 5, one for each sweater i own).

Thanks six sweater charlie please come back

Dr. Dogballs Jr. posted:

godfuckingdammit yu loving fu- *repeatedly smashes 5*

Thanks doc

935 posted:

drat it we need closure to this joke

*smashes the 5 key on keyboard*

*does not know how dead gay forums work*

Turn your monitor on

# ? Aug 24, 2016 21:21

gimme the GOD DAMN candy: Jul 1, 2007

because puppies are pretty dumb and it sometimes takes them a while to figure out how to handle stairs

# ? Aug 25, 2016 08:53

jsoh: Mar 24, 2007; O Muhammad, I seek your intercession with my Lord for the return of my eyesight

the joke is that the puppies paws are awkward causing it to stumble but also that by waiting to give the punch line you create an awkward pause which is a homophone of pause

# ? Aug 25, 2016 08:56

dZPnJOm8QwUAseApNj: Apr 15, 2002; arf bark woof

Symptoms of a Dog Who Fell Down the Stairs posted:

Maybe your pup is hesitant to come down the steps, or perhaps you heard a suspicious noise when you were in the other room. The thought of your dog taking a nasty tumble down the stairs is frightening. There's a host of potential complications from a bad fall, including sprained muscles, broken bones and internal injuries.

Tough Moves

If your dog is hobbling around, walking with a limp or not moving quite right, she may have taken a bumpy ride down the steps. A limp suggests pain, weakness or something wrong in the affected leg. There are many potential causes of a limp, including growth spurts and arthritis, but trauma, such as a fall, can lead to a variety of potential injuries. A torn ligament, muscle or tendon, dislocated joint or nerve damage are all possible from a stumble on the stairs, presenting as a limp or trouble moving around. She may whine or cry when she moves, as well.

Internal Trauma

A nasty spill, whether on the steps or coming off a jump, can lead to internal injuries, which can be tough to spot. If you take a fall, you might notice a bruise on your skin, as the tiny blood vessels beneath the surface burst from impact. However, it's difficult to see bruising on your dog since she's likely covered in fur. You can look for signs of internal damage by paying close attention to her behavior. If she's breathing shallowly, she may have lung damage. Coughing up blood can indicate injured lungs, abdomen or gastrointestinal organs.

Signs of Shock

Shock often accompanies traumatic injuries and your dog may show symptoms to include a rapid heart rate, bright red lips, gums and tongue, and panting -- all common in the early stages. In late-stage shock, breathing is much slower and her body temperature drops; her lips, gums and tongue are pale and her pulse is very weak.

In Her Head

If your dog bumps her head on a fall on the steps, she may suffer a head injury. A laceration or bleeding is the obvious sign of a head injury, but skull fractures and brain injuries aren't so easy to see. If she's suffered a contusion, or bruising, she won't lose consciousness but she will appear disoriented and wobbly. If she loses consciousness, she has a concussion, which may be mild, showing as a brief loss of consciousness, or severe, lasting hours or days. She may experience seizures, either immediately after the fall or as long as weeks after the injury as scars form where brain tissue died. In severe brain injuries, the brain swells and bleeds, affecting consciousness, or blood clots may form, showing lowered consciousness, one dilated pupil and potential weakness or paralysis in the limbs.

To the Vet

It's possible your dog lost her footing in her exuberance to run down the stairs to get a start on her day. However, if she's an old hand at taking the steps, keep a close eye on her to see if she's falling more than usual. There are a variety of reasons a dog may begin to fall, including inner ear infections, vestibular syndrome, tumors and strokes. You should have the vet examine her if she's falling more than usual. If your dog is showing any symptoms of suffering a fall, it's important she gets checked out by a vet to ensure she hasn't experienced a serious injury you can't see.

# ? Aug 25, 2016 09:01

shut up blegum: Dec 17, 2008; --->Plastic Lawn<---

jsoh posted:

the joke is that the puppies paws are awkward causing it to stumble but also that by waiting to give the punch line you create an awkward pause which is a homophone of pause

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

# ? Aug 25, 2016 09:12

jsoh: Mar 24, 2007; O Muhammad, I seek your intercession with my Lord for the return of my eyesight

jsoh posted:

the joke is that the puppies paws are awkward causing it to stumble but also that by waiting to give the punch line you create an awkward pause which is a homophone of pause

it should say "which is a homophone of paws" but I made a mistake

# ? Aug 25, 2016 09:36

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donkey salami posted:

do you wear six sweaters all at one time? all on your torso or some as a hat or do you make sweater shoes?

i need to know more

Six Sweater Charlie is a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a bunch of sweaters

# ? Aug 25, 2016 09:54

Lascivious Sloth: Apr 26, 2008; by sebmojo

jsoh posted:

it should say "which is a homophone of paws" but I made a mistake

I guess you're typing with awkward paws :q:

# ? Aug 25, 2016 10:00

Creed Reunion Tour: Jul 3, 2007; by Cyrano4747; Grimey Drawer

The puppy is Protected

# ? Aug 25, 2016 11:47

spud: Aug 27, 2003; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

R-Type posted:

Because I ad-blocked the medically unsafe and annoying background, that's why

AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

You need to connect with tyler man:

# ? Aug 25, 2016 11:53

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probably to escape the korean neighbors who live upstairs bwahaha

# ? Aug 25, 2016 11:57

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

jsoh posted:

the joke is that the puppies paws are awkward causing it to stumble but also that by waiting to give the punch line you create an awkward pause which is a homophone of pause

Thanks bud!

# ? Aug 25, 2016 13:38

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

Lascivious Sloth posted:

I guess you're typing with awkward paws

Hehe.

# ? Aug 25, 2016 13:38

thathonkey: Jul 17, 2012

i read the joke explanation a bunch of times but i dont really "get" this joke im afraid. i voted the thread 1 of 5 because that makes me feel dumb and like i am missing out on a bunch of fun all you joke-getters are having

# ? Aug 25, 2016 13:40

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

thathonkey posted:

i read the joke explanation a bunch of times but i dont really "get" this joke im afraid. i voted the thread 1 of 5 because that makes me feel dumb and like i am missing out on a bunch of fun all you joke-getters are having

Turn your monitor on :pseudo:

# ? Aug 25, 2016 13:41

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

Hey gold mine this Tia

# ? Aug 27, 2016 06:41

Helical Nightmares: Apr 30, 2009

*nods and strokes beard*

Postmodern 5

# ? Aug 27, 2016 08:00

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

Helical Nightmares posted:

*nods and strokes beard*

Postmodern 5

Quite right *sips coffee*

# ? Aug 27, 2016 14:34

thathonkey: Jul 17, 2012

i still dont get it

# ? Aug 27, 2016 14:38

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

thathonkey posted:

i still dont get it

I'll draw you a graph baby just vote 5

# ? Aug 27, 2016 14:44

Ben Smash: Aug 22, 2005; LARDROOM; Grimey Drawer

Jfc Go to your room

# ? Aug 27, 2016 19:24

Turpitude: Oct 13, 2004; Love love love

be an organ donor; Soiled Meat

Awkw-

# ? Aug 27, 2016 21:37

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

Ben Smash posted:

Jfc Go to your room

Lol get lost lesser smash

Turpitude posted:

Awkw-

AWKWARD PAWS!!!!!!

# ? Aug 27, 2016 23:01

Warm und Fuzzy: Jun 20, 2006

"Because he was a little [Dog breed that's also a pun]"

# ? Aug 28, 2016 00:02

Smash it Smash hit: Dec 30, 2009; prettay, prettay

Warm und Fuzzy posted:

"Because he was a little [Dog breed that's also a pun]"

Did you vote this thread 5?

# ? Aug 28, 2016 01:23

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

Smash it Smash hit posted:

...

he was not protected

# ? Aug 28, 2016 01:45

AEMINAL: May 22, 2015; barf barf i am a dog, barf on your carpet, barf

Dr. Dogballs Jr. posted:

godfuckingdammit yu loving fu- *repeatedly smashes 5*

your pup is sick

edit: my music is perfectly matching up to this gif.. its amazing, wish u all were here

# ? Aug 28, 2016 02:17

Warm und Fuzzy: Jun 20, 2006

Smash it Smash hit posted:

Did you vote this thread 5?

I checked and no dog fits the formula. In fact no combination of setup and dog breed fits the formula. It's frustrating because the mathematics of the joke check out.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 02:44

clam the FUCK down: Dec 20, 2013

With the decrease in access to family planning I can speculate that it is possible the puppy realized it was unable to provide for a baby and thus resorted to old methods of abortion such as those seen before Row v. Wade, including falling down stairs on purpose to induce a miscarriage.

Take care pupper, the patriarchy will not always have control of reproduction

# ? Aug 28, 2016 02:47