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I couldn't get past the first ~100 pages of goon favorite The Blade Itself, along with His Majesty's Dragon. The writing was fair-to-middling to bland in both cases, and both of them felt like the authors needed to sit and actually ask themselves if their stories were interesting instead of just ambling about, trying to get somewhere while being about fantasy tropes or inverting the same. I really do like interesting SFF, but, but... maybe I just can't handle 'gently caress yeah, swords and dragons' as compelling on their own anymore... 
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Jun 9, 2010 00:14
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Blade Itself needed some sort of tweaking. Not much really happens in it, but it sets up two much better books.
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Jun 9, 2010 00:33
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hello clarice posted:I couldn't go any further in the Dresden Files after reading Storm Front because it just stopped being interesting. Also, disliked that every ten seconds Harry is drained to dying of magic but then somehow is able to just DIG DEEP and work some giant crazy magic that then makes him drained to dying of magic but then somehow is able to just DIG DEEP… lather, rinse, repeat. Most definitely this. I picked up a paperback to see what the fuss was about and goddamn it was awful. I don't think I've ever read (around half of) a book more written for LARP'ing neckbeards than this one. Like you said, it seems like every advance in the plot is the main character trying to eke out one more spell while things are increasingly turning into poo poo around him coupled with boring lore. It's one of those books where, had the used bookstore not taken it, I would have gladly tossed in in the trash can outside.
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Jun 9, 2010 03:27
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Estrellas posted:I've stopped reading Dresden for similar reasons; I get the info I need from Wikipedia when my friends start going OMG DRESDEN IS THE BEST, and a short Wikipedia summary is able to make me sound like I read it. Oh god The Historian. That book just really frustrated me. I just couldn't believe that the mighty Dracula would enact this epic search for the perfect...librarian. Really? That's his dastardly plot?
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Jun 9, 2010 03:59
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Count me in for the people who couldn't make it through Cryptonomicon. I read about ~150 pages and I just gave up, the plot hadn't even started, the characters and situations were completely unbelievable, and I couldn't give a poo poo about any of it. Note to Stephenson: A good story can be written in way less than 1,000 pages.
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Jun 9, 2010 23:08
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I recently tried to read a novel by Gore Vidal, Empire. I barely finished the first chapter and ended up giving it to the local library branch. Knowing nothing else about Vidal's work, I assumed it would be mostly historical. It turned out that it was more like 18th century chick-lit. I also couldn't get through Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs. I read the first half, but the lack of plot really got to me after a while. It seemed too much like post-modern slop.
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Jun 10, 2010 21:25
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hello clarice posted:Oh god The Historian. That book just really frustrated me. I just couldn't believe that the mighty Dracula would enact this epic search for the perfect...librarian. Really? That's his dastardly plot? I think it's even worse when they killed Dracula by shooting him
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Jun 11, 2010 04:54
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Borneo Jimmy posted:I think it's even worse when they killed Dracula by shooting him See, I never made it THAT far, ever. The last thing I remember is something about a train trip, which bored me so much I put it aside. That was the furthest I ever got in it, and that was maybe the... 2nd? try.
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Jun 12, 2010 16:42
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My sister loves Philippa Gregory and I enjoy historical fiction so when I found a cheap copy of Wideacre for sale I decided to pick it up. I got about 50 pages in before tossing it aside. The main character was just so unlikeable and it didn't seem worth it to slog through 800 pages to see if she got her comeuppance or not. I didn't even get to the incest part! Another recommendation from my sister was Into the Wilderness. Let me tell you, I really tried with that one. I made it about 500 pages before I gave up. When I told my sister this she said "But that's just when it starts to get good!" I'm sorry, but if the "good part" of a 1000 page book doesn't happen until 500 pages in, it's not a very good book. I really don't know how my sister got through that whole series. She's been pestering me to read Outlander as well, but I'm a little wary now of her recommendations.
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Jun 14, 2010 08:48
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The Historian was really bad. I spent hours slogging through half of it, then skipped to the last chapter to find out if it was worth continuing. It wasn't. I recently read 80% of "The Art of Racing in the Rain." I only went that far into it because I was stuck on an airplane with nothing else to do. Really, really bad. The books that become best-sellers really blow my mind sometimes....
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Jul 11, 2010 18:12
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NoodleBaby posted:
That book made me cry like no other. What didn't you like about it?
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Jul 12, 2010 15:34
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I am really struggling with Goon favourite The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. It sucks because I can see there is a good story in here somewhere but I absolutely cannot stand the main character. He's an arrogant, pompous cock and not in the good way like Locke Lamora - all the characters are completely in awe of him and he is in awe of himself. Rothfuss is keen to show us over and over how smart and bad rear end Kvothe is, but he does it in the laziest possible fashion. Characters ask him questions like "OMG squeeee is it true you learned a complicated language in an afternoon?" and he's all, "Why, yes."  Then you see a character whose trade is chronicling stories, and over the years he has developed a complex form of shorthand. Kvothe picks this up in exactly two minutes of observation, starts writing in it and says something like "Hey, correct me if I got anything wrong!". This is followed by him telling us his story of being trained by an arcanist and repeatedly saying things like "He thought it would take me 6 months to master this incredibly complicated technique, but it only took me three hours." There is a scene where he grabs someone by the wrist to restrain them and then leaves the room, and once he has left the other characters ooh and aah over the bruises he has left because he's sooo strong and bad rear end. During Kvothe's retelling of his story there is a scene where he overhears his parents and his mentor spooging over how smart and talented and amazing he is for maybe four pages. Daddy is so proud of him! Rothfuss doesn't have any issues, noooo. I hate Kvothe so much.
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Jul 12, 2010 16:55
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Penfold the Brave posted:I am really struggling with Goon favourite The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. It sucks because I can see there is a good story in here somewhere but I absolutely cannot stand the main character. He's an arrogant, pompous cock and not in the good way like Locke Lamora - all the characters are completely in awe of him and he is in awe of himself. I haven't read it but people seem to think that Kvothe is an unreliable narrator.
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Jul 12, 2010 16:57
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Pompous Rhombus posted:I haven't read it but people seem to think that Kvothe is an unreliable narrator. I could believe that, but he only narrates the part of the story set in the past - the present is third person and he's equally insufferable and everyone is still slobbing his knob at every opportunity. I will probably still slog through it like an idiot.
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Jul 12, 2010 17:09
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S.M. Stirling's Dies The Fire Jesus H. Titty-loving Christ on a pogo stick! I love a good post-apocalyptic novel, but there has to be some sort of apocalypse in it for it to make any sense. The best explanation we get for what happened that caused this particular apocalypse? Alien space bats. I read far enough into it to realize that Ren Faire people would be the only survivors and I dumped it in the goodwill donation box.
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Jul 12, 2010 21:43
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I could not finish The Da Vinci Code. I think I got 2/3rds of the way through, and the action was replaced with the Author's opinions/hackneyed theory about the Catholic Church.
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Jul 12, 2010 22:24
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Penfold the Brave posted:I am really struggling with Goon favourite The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. It sucks because I can see there is a good story in here somewhere but I absolutely cannot stand the main character. He's an arrogant, pompous cock and not in the good way like Locke Lamora - all the characters are completely in awe of him and he is in awe of himself. Thank you for warning me. I was going to pick this up on my next book run, but I'd have hated it, because that kind of protagonist absolutely drives me batshit. Sadly, that does make fantasy--and science fiction--hard on me, since I love both genres, but drat if the level of bad protagonists isn't off the loving charts.
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Jul 12, 2010 22:29
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Pick posted:Thank you for warning me. I was going to pick this up on my next book run, but I'd have hated it, because that kind of protagonist absolutely drives me batshit. Sadly, that does make fantasy--and science fiction--hard on me, since I love both genres, but drat if the level of bad protagonists isn't off the loving charts. You're totally welcome. I am starting to read him with Zapp Brannigan's voice in my head and it's making the whole experience much more enjoyable. Go ahead, try it out: "I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. I burned down the town of Trebon. I have spent the night with Felurian and left with both my sanity and my life. I was expelled from the University at a younger age than most people are allowed in. I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during day. I have talked to Gods, loved women, and written songs that make the minstrels weep. You may have heard of me." Edit: Ahahahaha, I got to the following line while I was on the train and I busted up laughing so hard that people were looking at me. He turned back to the fire. "Ben's training has given me a memory so clean and sharp I have to be careful not to cut myself sometimes." TELL ME YOU DON'T HEAR ZAPP'S VOICE WHEN YOU READ THAT. Edit 2: Also Pick, if you haven't read it already, try The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch instead. It is by far one of the best fantasy novels I have ever read. The second installment isn't as good as the first but it's still awesome. The First Law trilogy by Joe Abercrombie is also worth a look, Sand dan Glokta is a really interesting subversion of the villains you usually see in a fantasy novel. Penfold the Brave fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Jul 13, 2010 |
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Jul 12, 2010 23:39
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POSSIBLE SPOILER BELOW BUT YOU SHOULDN'T READ THE BOOK ANYWAY. Hello Clarice: my mom said the same thing, which is why I spent $15 on the book (ugh). I found the characters totally one-sided: Denny good, grandparents bad. The two lawyers were totally stereotypical. I quit reading when Denny was offered the job in Italy - that reeked of deus ex machina, aka the laziest form of storytelling. Of course, I didn't read the last 50 pages or so, so perhaps my analysis would be different if I'd actually finished the book. But somehow I doubt it.
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Jul 13, 2010 01:19
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Penfold the Brave posted:You're totally welcome. I am starting to read him with Zapp Brannigan's voice in my head and it's making the whole experience much more enjoyable. This needs an audiobook reading by Billy West pronto.
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Jul 13, 2010 02:17
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Penfold the Brave posted:You're totally welcome. I am starting to read him with Zapp Brannigan's voice in my head and it's making the whole experience much more enjoyable. Haha, this is awesome. You just made the book 10000x better, thank you. I did not like the book, but I'm not much of a fantasy reader and only read it because a friend loved it. Kvothe is a terrible character and clearly only intended to be unreliable insofar as minor details (like the guy who comments that every woman in his story is beautiful.)
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Jul 13, 2010 02:41
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Holy poo poo that Zapp Brannigan thing is so perfect it's a little frightening.
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Jul 13, 2010 19:55
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sexual rickshaw posted:Count me in for the people who couldn't make it through Cryptonomicon. I read about ~150 pages and I just gave up, the plot hadn't even started, the characters and situations were completely unbelievable, and I couldn't give a poo poo about any of it. Agreed. I stopped at basically the same spot, for the same reasons. I didn't care about any characters, and the book was boring. And poo poo, I have read some seriously bad fantasy novels, so it's not like I can't slog through a poorly plotted unsympathetic trainwreck.
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Jul 13, 2010 20:51
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/\ I'm also in that situation (not even sure if I made it that far.) Diamond Age had similar issues but at least the opening chapters were intriguing enough that I continued.
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Jul 13, 2010 22:11
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Mokinokaro posted:(re: Cryptonomicon) I'm also in that situation (not even sure if I made it that far.) Diamond Age had similar issues but at least the opening chapters were intriguing enough that I continued. It doesn't get better, so if you're flailing by page 150, there's little reason to persist. (To clarify, I don't think Cryptonomicon is a terrible book. There's some cute vignettes and interesting exposition. But it's a horribly bloated and doesn't really go anywhere, except the next tree-killer doorstop of a novel. And for a book of that length, you'd want more than being mildly amused.)
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Jul 13, 2010 22:44
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Evfedu posted:Holy poo poo that Zapp Brannigan thing is so perfect it's a little frightening. I'm half tempted to re-read it like that, except it would waste another couple of hours of my life that I'll never get back.
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Jul 14, 2010 00:53
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After watching an old episode of the Batman TV series I am now alternating between Zapp and Adam West, which is also hilarious. It's sad when you have to do this to glean enjoyment from a novel but on the other hand it's making me laugh far more than is normal or healthy.
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Jul 14, 2010 19:50
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Penfold the Brave posted:You're totally welcome. I am starting to read him with Zapp Brannigan's voice in my head and it's making the whole experience much more enjoyable. quote:Edit 2: Also Pick, if you haven't read it already, try The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch instead. It is by far one of the best fantasy novels I have ever read. The second installment isn't as good as the first but it's still awesome. The First Law trilogy by Joe Abercrombie is also worth a look, Sand dan Glokta is a really interesting subversion of the villains you usually see in a fantasy novel.
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Jul 14, 2010 22:22
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I dunno, I liked Name of the Wind. Kvothe is an arrogant bastard, but he has reason to be. He still gets the poo poo beat out of him, fails at various things, and often has his arrogance get him in trouble and get the better of him. Plus I really like the world and the magic in it. I started reading And Another Thing..., the sixth Hitchiker's Guide book. It's not too bad...but I dunno. It's hard to read too much of it because it just seems like all the characters are driven by circumstance, not choices or anything of the sort, and that bores me. It might change later, but I don't know. Also Colfer seems to think that its Adams-esque to invent a new planet/culture/race for a one-off joke, and it's just tiresome sometimes.
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Jul 15, 2010 00:55
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Morpheus posted:I dunno, I liked Name of the Wind. Kvothe is an arrogant bastard, but he has reason to be. He still gets the poo poo beat out of him, fails at various things, and often has his arrogance get him in trouble and get the better of him. Plus I really like the world and the magic in it. Yeah, I enjoyed that book. He's arrogant, but the point is that he failed miserably at something because the present narrator is all depressed and reclusive. It seems to me that the arrogance is just part of it. But, I suppose I like to give authors the benefit of the doubt on these things. Besides, it's not like he lives a charmed life, he's dirt poor and gets his rear end kicked a lot.
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Jul 15, 2010 14:33
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My issue is that he's magically brilliant at everything instantly, and that is a very lazy way to try to write a compelling protagonist. Yeah he fails at poo poo and he's poor, but that's in spite of him being amazingly fantastic at everything - it's not like he personally made a mistake that led to his lovely life, that was his father's fault. Good characters need real weaknesses as well as strengths - they need to have things that they're not good at too. All Kvothe has is arrogance and when that's combined with perfection in all other areas it doesn't make for a very likeable (or more importantly, interesting) character. Even loving J. K. Rowling understands this poo poo, it's very basic stuff. Harry has stuff he is good and bad at - even Hermione, the super smart one, is crap at riding broomsticks and quits one of her classes because she sucks at it (granted it's a bullshit class but still). Yeah, I'm comparing Rothfuss unfavourably to J. K. Rowling. I am going there. By no means do I think Rowling is an incredible writer, but she at least understands the basics of making a rounded character. The present character is reclusive but he's every bit as full of himself (if not more) as the young one so what has he learned? Certainly not humility. A much better example of a character arc like this is Jezal dan Luthar from Joe Abercrombie's First Law trilogy. I won't go into too much detail but imagine Kvothe without all the ridiculous "awesome at everything" crap, sprinkle on some extra selfishness and you have Luthar, who is approximately 100x more interesting. Locke Lamora is incredibly smart but he's poo poo at fighting and (in the beginning) he doesn't think through his plans. Luke Skywalker didn't start out as a mega-talented badass Jedi and Star Wars would have sucked if he had. Han Solo is an arrogant bastard who is good at flying and shooting but he's a loving lunkhead in places and is not good at thinking on his feet. These are good, rounded and believable characters in fantastic situations. Arrogance alone is not enough. I am waiting for a scene in The Name of the Wind where Kvothe puts a bully in his place. I know in my bones it's going to happen. When it does, I am going to laugh my butt off because it will just be confirmation that this is Rothfuss' teenage wet dream. Ok, done editing this now. Penfold the Brave fucked around with this message at 18:05 on Jul 15, 2010 |
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Jul 15, 2010 16:50
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hogswallower posted:Do you people actually throw books or are you just incapable of speaking in anything but hyperbole? I actually once killed a hornet with my copy of The Stand. I looked up, saw it crawling down my windowsill, let out little panicked yelp and threw the book. It kept me entertained for 1000+ pages and kept me safe from potential hornet stings. Thanks, Stephen!
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Jul 15, 2010 17:24
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If you throw books you are literally a baby. Also Name of the Wind sounds freaking terrible. edit: this is actually what pisses me off the most quote:Then you see a character whose trade is chronicling stories, and over the years he has developed a complex form of shorthand. Kvothe picks this up in exactly two minutes of observation, starts writing in it and says something like "Hey, correct me if I got anything wrong!". You CANNOT DERIVE SEMANTICS FROM SYNTAX ALONE, FUCKWIT reflir fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Jul 15, 2010 |
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Jul 15, 2010 17:31
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Recently gave up on Dan Simmons' Black Hills the story of the main character wasn't too bad but Simmons had this annoying habit of just throwing random words in Lakota into his sentences. The big reason I stopped reading it though was the interstitial bits from General Custer. They would just be rambling pornographic monologues. Here's Custer talking about how his wife just LOVES to give him blowjobs. Now he's talking about the time they were on vacation in New York and she had him shave off all her pubic hair.
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Jul 15, 2010 19:57
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muscles like this? posted:Recently gave up on Dan Simmons' Black Hills the story of the main character wasn't too bad but Simmons had this annoying habit of just throwing random words in Lakota into his sentences. Orson Scott Card annoyed me in the Speaker/Xenocide/Children arc with characters speaking mostly English but occasionally switching to Portugese and then supplies the translation on the very same line - the characters were supposed to be speaking Portugese the whole time. I never could figure out why he did that except to pad word count. I think Card just gets off on Portugese when he moves everyone to Brazil in a later installment of the Shadow stories.
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Jul 16, 2010 02:53
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Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick. I really wanted to like it, since I normally like alternate timeline type stuff, but ugh. I kinda finished it, but really I just skimmed through so I could move on to something else. And I'm sure it's been mentioned but several of the later Wheel of Time books. Summaries it is.
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Jul 16, 2010 03:54
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^^^^ Sorry there weren't enough bombers in the Civil War or centurions riding raptors or whatever. Penfold the Brave posted:I am waiting for a scene in The Name of the Wind where Kvothe puts a bully in his place. I know in my bones it's going to happen. When it does, I am going to laugh my butt off because it will just be confirmation that this is Rothfuss' teenage wet dream. So have you gotten to it yet? It's about 300 pages in. I'm halfway through and still enjoying it, so... To contribute: Boneshaker I don't mind the whole steampunk fandom, but this was like someone writing out someone else's LARP session, without regard to any basic rules of prose writing.
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Jul 16, 2010 05:55
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I know this has already been mentioned, but the first Wheel of Time book. Would someone please explain to me other people's obsession with this series? I seriously would like to know why it's been so highly recommended to me. What am I missing that could potentially inspire me to pick it back up? I find the characters two dimensional and dull. Same with the writing. I also couldn't finish The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle by Haruki Murakami. I enjoyed it well enough but put it down for awhile and never bothered to resume reading.
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Jul 16, 2010 11:01
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planets in space posted:I know this has already been mentioned, but the first Wheel of Time book. Would someone please explain to me other people's obsession with this series? I seriously would like to know why it's been so highly recommended to me. What am I missing that could potentially inspire me to pick it back up? I find the characters two dimensional and dull. Same with the writing. The writing does get better but the story gets worse. While the first book takes place over the course of a year, and has loads of stuff happen, one of the later books takes place over the course of 8 hours and nothing happens till the last 20 pages.
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Jul 16, 2010 12:47
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Tropic of Cancer I was about 80% of the way through it. I just couldn't take it anymore. It is basically a directionless novel about an American banging whores in Paris. It's just giant monologues about how poor/desperate/angsty he is about...something.
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Jul 16, 2010 13:21
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