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Madkal posted:This is by far the creepiest and weirdest part of the poster. I know it is the angle and all but it seriously looks like the kid has one ear. And down syndrome. 
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Jul 26, 2012 03:36
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I've heard it's hard to get the actors to all pose together in one place for promo shots and posters but hooooly poo poo it's like they couldn't get the actors' heads and faces together at once.    So then the bartender says to the horse, "Why the tiny face?!" No wait that's not right.
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Jul 26, 2012 03:36
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Lobok posted:Like, who the gently caress is this? Some guy who just closed up his bar? A London factory worker? Well he's obviously Irish. Look at his hat!
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Jul 26, 2012 03:36
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Dillbag posted:According to the link he's part of the Irish coven, whatever the gently caress that means. I thought the only other vampires in the movies were Italian  (Watched the movies for the RiffTrax. Also, I read all the books a few years ago so I could have validation for making fun of them. I read Breaking Dawn but I barely remember anything about it. Don't remember any Irish vampires.)
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Jul 26, 2012 03:38
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I bet they're sick of bloody potatoes 
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Jul 26, 2012 03:43
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I'm really wondering if this poo poo is intentional, like they pulled them apart them and reassembled their features to intentionally throw viewers into the "uncanny valley" and become disturbed by them. It's just the less established actors get played up more. Case in point, Ashley Greene, who's been in these films almost from the start...  
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Jul 26, 2012 03:50
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kiimo posted:
Young Freud posted:I'm really wondering if this poo poo is intentional, like they pulled them apart them and reassembled their features to intentionally throw viewers into the "uncanny valley" and become disturbed by them. Maybe the artist... no... Maybe the "artist" for this poster genuinely thought they were improving these people's looks. And are just terrible. It's either a clever way to disturb us, or utter terribleness. Considering this IS Twilight... Robot Hobo fucked around with this message at 04:13 on Jul 26, 2012 |
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Jul 26, 2012 04:09
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Jul 26, 2012 04:11
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Young Freud posted:I'm really wondering if this poo poo is intentional, like they pulled them apart them and reassembled their features to intentionally throw viewers into the "uncanny valley" and become disturbed by them. It's just the less established actors get played up more. That's not too bad. It's the best one by far, but I guess it's hard to get a bad picture of her since she's beautiful. The worst thing is her pose should be straight on but her head is tilted just a bit and it's like she's craning her neck. A lot of it is that they seem to be moving their heads in the opposite direction of their necks or tilting their heads or something.
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Jul 26, 2012 04:16
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We managed to make her look like her...
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Jul 26, 2012 04:24
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Codependent Poster posted:That's not too bad. It's the best one by far, but I guess it's hard to get a bad picture of her since she's beautiful. The worst thing is her pose should be straight on but her head is tilted just a bit and it's like she's craning her neck. I noticed the neck thing as well and it was one of the things that made me question if it was some attempt at purposely using the "uncanny valley". I also think one of her eyes is off, like it was taken from another full face picture, but I can't be too sure.
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Jul 26, 2012 06:06
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Is there one of Peter Facinelli?
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Jul 26, 2012 06:14
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Yodzilla posted:
To be fair, that actress actually looks like that.
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Jul 26, 2012 06:47
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If everything about the movies weren't so stupid and lazy and I might congratulate them for being so grotesque and unsettling. It's not like deformed William H. Macy or Dolph Lundgren's knife bigger than his head where it's something off to the side, it's just one giant poster-filling monstrosity.
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Jul 26, 2012 07:42
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If all the posters looked like this I think I might actually consider seeing this.
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Jul 26, 2012 07:46
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Dillbag posted:According to the link he's part of the Irish coven, whatever the gently caress that means. It means everything about Twilight is loving terrible and we should really stop talking about it before some poor unfortunate goon decides he will go see the movie "just to see if it's as stupid bad as it looks and so I can laugh at it  " and we are forced to care for the drooling shattered ruin of a man that returns for the rest of our lives.I used to joke about Twilight, asking what series of books could be so popular that even its lovely fanfic was being published and turned into movies - implying that Twilight was the lovely fanfic, of course. Now there is Fifty Shades of Grey, and it's not a joke any more. 
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Jul 26, 2012 08:04
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Breaking Dawn 1 (even with Rifftrax) was one of the most intensely boring movies I have ever seen, about one of the most intensely boring couples I have ever seen. I don't think it will do anything worse than put your average goon to sleep for a couple hours.
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Jul 26, 2012 08:50
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Wasn't there going to be a Fifty Shades of Grey movie, or did I imagine that in some nightmarish daydream?
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Jul 26, 2012 08:55
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Vagabundo posted:Wasn't there going to be a Fifty Shades of Grey movie, or did I imagine that in some nightmarish daydream? It just got producers attached to it. Bret Easton Ellis has also started a new career of giving the film makers advice about the movie on his twitter account, which is pretty amazing and totally justifies the movies existence.
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Jul 26, 2012 09:09
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Young Freud posted:I'm really wondering if this poo poo is intentional, like they pulled them apart them and reassembled their features to intentionally throw viewers into the "uncanny valley" and become disturbed by them. It's just the less established actors get played up more. "Oh no you di'int"
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Jul 26, 2012 09:18
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Dillbag posted:Real Breaking Dawn part 2 character posters are out now, and many of them are... well... There's a Drag Queen coven?
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Jul 26, 2012 09:29
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I take it I'm not the only person who's reminded of Paris is Burning while looking at some of those Twilight posters.
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Jul 26, 2012 10:17
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I bet this guy is overjoyed to see that they managed to make him look like an NPC from Oblivion.
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Jul 26, 2012 12:24
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How has no one made pasty into Busey yet? I don't have photoshop right now. Darn it.
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Jul 26, 2012 13:31
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Madkal posted:At least that poster is fan made. Stewart's eyes freaked me out. Not the red pupil but the way she looks bloody doped out of her mind. I hate to tell you this, but much of the time she IS doped out of her mind. Can't say I blame her.
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Jul 26, 2012 14:33
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mistaya posted:Breaking Dawn 1 (even with Rifftrax) was one of the most intensely boring movies I have ever seen, about one of the most intensely boring couples I have ever seen. I don't think it will do anything worse than put your average goon to sleep for a couple hours. Yeah, the RiffTrax was one of the best (all the Twilight RiffTraxes are), but the movie itself was just painfully dull. After New Moon, I thought it couldn't get much worse. Eclipse was...not as bad, I guess? I've completely forgotten everything that happened in it, so I guess if it was worse than New Moon, I would have remembered. Breaking Dawn Part 1, though, was probably the most boring thing ever committed to film.
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Jul 26, 2012 15:54
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Vagabundo posted:Wasn't there going to be a Fifty Shades of Grey movie, or did I imagine that in some nightmarish daydream? It's porn  outside of selling it as porn how are they going to distribute it.http://www.jest.com/video/174214/gilbert-gottfried-reads-fifty-shades-of-grey
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Jul 26, 2012 16:06
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Extreme soft focus. You can't censor two flesh-coloured clouds intersecting. e: or change everything except the title.
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Jul 26, 2012 16:09
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homerlaw posted:It's porn Holy loving poo poo, I would seriously buy the audio book is he was the one reading it aloud. I haven't laughed this much in ages. What's wrong with your facccce? Pesky Splinter fucked around with this message at 16:34 on Jul 26, 2012 |
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Jul 26, 2012 16:28
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Pesky Splinter posted:Holy loving poo poo, I would seriously buy the audio book is he was the one reading it aloud. I haven't laughed this much in ages. That one's incredible. I almost cried from laughing so hard the first time I heard it. There's also this one of Jon St. John (Duke Nukem) reading it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oUa-3W0BFI
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Jul 26, 2012 16:41
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mistaya posted:How has no one made pasty into Busey yet? I don't have photoshop right now. Darn it. fine...  I think it actually looks more normal.
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Jul 26, 2012 16:42
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f#a# posted:fine... You know I was opposed to the new sequel to Harry Potter but Gary Busey as Lucious Malfoy is pretty good casting.
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Jul 26, 2012 16:53
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If you found people that had no idea what Twilight was but had otherwise normal sensibilities, you could show them these posters and give them a brief synopsis of the film and they'd tell you it was clearly a comedy film. At least when the Harry Potter movies released posters for every character they had some mood lighting or interesting "gritty" effects. These look straight out of Glamour Shots.
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Jul 26, 2012 17:05
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Rageaholic Monkey posted:That one's incredible. I almost cried from laughing so hard the first time I heard it. This is turning into The Eye of Argon for the modern age, isn't it?
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Jul 26, 2012 17:58
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There's also the Washington Nationals' bullpen reading lines from 50 Shades of Grey: video
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Jul 26, 2012 17:59
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Apes-Ma posted:I bet this guy is overjoyed to see that they managed to make him look like an NPC from Oblivion. I'm frantically trying to find a speechcraft wheel so I can put a less unpleasant expression on his face.
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Jul 26, 2012 19:45
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Jedit posted:This is turning into The Eye of Argon for the modern age, isn't it? Only if we're lucky. I want as many hilarious readings of this dreck as the universe can vomit forth.
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Jul 26, 2012 22:36
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Jul 26, 2012 23:18
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Oh god, what is it?! 
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Jul 26, 2012 23:53
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Jasta posted:Oh god, what is it?! You have no idea how happy you should feel for not knowing about White Chicks
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Jul 27, 2012 00:00
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