|
tuyop posted:Well I don't think we really need to get into it, but read what actually happened to me. The taxes are my fault but aren't a big deal, but this loving accommodations debacle has nothing to do with me. Haha, keep telling yourself that. Your whole situation has everything to do with you and your choices
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 17:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 7, 2024 03:40 |
|
|
quaint bucket posted:Haha, ok. I don't know about you but quite a few military personnel that I know are Bad At Life but excellent at their job. We have to assume that Tuyop is actually good at his job. After all, he carried a gun and if he handled it the way he handles his financial affairs, he'd have shot himself several times over by now.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 17:55
|
|
|
He did hurt his back with a machine gun...
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 17:58
|
|
|
/\/\ a rocket launcher originally, actually. But in the end they're all just tubes of various sizes that shoot poo poo anyway. Fraternite posted:Haha, keep telling yourself that. Yeah you're right, I should just quit everything and separate myself from society and go into the wilderness to die because the Internet thinks having debt or making mistakes makes you a terrible person. This is all very funny. Different facets of a person's life are all mutually exclusive to certain degrees. I'm very good at some things and absolutely terrible at others. Being terrible at some things doesn't mean that all of my other skills and talents or whole other parts of my life are worthless or invalid. (according to my psychologist) Also all officers in the Canadian forces are not Winters from Band of Brothers. I know some downright evil people who are experiencing tons of success, some disgusting ones who are not, and some few who are just incredibly switched on but being totally hosed by the system. The army is a microcosm of the rest of society.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 17:59
|
|
|
I don’t think it’s unusual for people to be good at their jobs and horrible in life. At least I hope they are better at their jobs than life because I get tons of people who apply for loans and their credit is a disaster, all their accounts are overdrawn, their utilities are behind and they are driving around in cars that have payments higher than most of you are paying in rent, and yet they have jobs where they are making life and death decisions.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 18:08
|
|
|
tuyop posted:Yeah you're right, I should just quit everything and separate myself from society and go into the wilderness to die because the Internet thinks having debt or making mistakes makes you a terrible person. I'm not suggesting anything like that, though -- all I'm saying is for you to think that "this loving accommodations debacle has nothing to do with me" is crazy, because you went out of your way to make a series of really screwed up choices, frankly. I don't think you're fundamentally broken, or that you're stupid or something. But you have to realise that the gong show you're currently in is highly related to the fact that you thought living out of a car and/or crashing on friends' couches was a good choice. It wasn't and it's still not.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 18:17
|
|
|
Zeta Taskforce posted:I don’t think it’s unusual for people to be good at their jobs and horrible in life. At least I hope they are better at their jobs than life because I get tons of people who apply for loans and their credit is a disaster, all their accounts are overdrawn, their utilities are behind and they are driving around in cars that have payments higher than most of you are paying in rent, and yet they have jobs where they are making life and death decisions. Yeah tuyop I agree with you that the army is a microcosm of society. I'm definitely not saying that I or any other military officer I know is perfect, and some are as you say, downright bad people. What I'm saying is the average officer's job isn't literally shooting and killing bad guys but 'fighting the unit'. That is, take in information, process, decide and convince the team around him to execute properly. Whether that is with a rifle platoon, tank squadron, artillery battery, B-52 or aircraft carrier... My point is the 'disaster credit, overdrawn account, high car payment'-guy should be looking to you and his NCO's for advice and help. Guys like that will eventually have problems because of their mistakes: work, family, mental, physical whatever, that poo poo piles on. Next thing you know that guy is loving poo poo up for everyone because his head isn't on straight. If the guy with the hosed up head is the head of the unit, well, that really doesn't help. You seem like you're still pretty junior and your career seems to be very much in flux, but I don't think it's too far fetched to think that your personal habits and choices will affect how others perceive you and possibly how you perform at work.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 18:28
|
|
|
tuyop posted:Yeah you're right, I should just quit everything and separate myself from society and go into the wilderness to die because the Internet thinks having debt or making mistakes makes you a terrible person. You always do this in this thread. You admit in your weirdly sheepish-but-bold way that you have once again hosed up something, and then when someone points out that this is in fact you loving up, you try to position their statement as being outrageous with this sort of sarcastic overreaction. Dude. You were too lazy to do your own taxes even when you thought you were getting a refund, despite being in serious financial straits. Sure, lots of people gently caress up and don't file their taxes, but you are in theory trying to fix your financial woes, so you should have done them on time. Moreover, you have to have known that when you admitted it to the thread, people would react. So why act all butthurt about people's reactions? What are you doing here, anyway? What do you expect from us? If you're convinced that "the Internet" is just going to condemn you as a worthless person when you admit to yet another idiotic mistake, well, perhaps it's time you and "the Internet" severed your relationship. Or maybe you could stop being a helpless victim forever reacting to the next imminent financial crisis and start proactively taking care of your money issues before they become yet another financial crisis. Like, say, filing your loving taxes on time. As for the whole paperwork thing, yes, people will screw up and not tell you the right forms to fill out. But, you rely too much on what some army clerk is telling you verbally and not enough on reading the documentation and understanding it. I bet the procedure is documented and I bet a resourceful person can find it. And even if you can't, it is not a helpful attitude to just throw up your hands and figure welp, it's all unfair, I'm a victim, nothing to be done about it, I'll just stand here in the rain. (Are you, or are you not, sleeping indoors somewhere tonight? You are bad at clearly communicating your situation.)
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 18:46
|
|
|
Fraternite posted:Haha, keep telling yourself that. On a lark I went back to read the first few pages the other day. Tuyop, you might want to do the same every now and then. Review choices and outcomes, you know?
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 18:49
|
|
|
You need to be an active participant in your own rescue, Tuyop. People are throwing you ropes, but it's up to you to grab on.
|
|
#
?
Sep 20, 2012 19:43
|
|
|
tuyop posted:Well I don't think we really need to get into it, but read what actually happened to me. The taxes are my fault but aren't a big deal, but this loving accommodations debacle has nothing to do with me. Bullshit. You need to take responsibility for your own situation. Your back being injured doesn't automatically mean you're out of a house - there's a whole heap of enabling decisions that contributed to that also, many of which you made. The sooner you take full responsibility for what happened, the sooner you're in the right mindframe to fix it.
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 04:47
|
|
|
To clarify, I make do and manage to sleep indoors every night. I have a great network of friends and coworkers and people who owe me favors all over the place and they've really done a lot to keep me sane and alive for the past two or three months. I found the cheapest quarters of all which are ten dollars a night, and there's two beds so it's almost like I'm living with the girlfriend. It's not as cheap as staying on a couch in town and biking there, so I've done that whenever possible, without wearing out my welcome, as well. This whole housing thing, since September 10th, has cost about 130 dollars in gas and quarters. Food is more expensive but I've been running on about 9 dollars a day, mostly raw foods that I've stashed in my filing cabinet and discount frozen dinners and much more fast food than I usually do, which I've paid for in "fun" money. (Not counting the smashed windshield, which balances out with the door dent money I guess) I guess by "enabling decisions" you guys mean the decision to save as much money as possible until I get an answer from the military. I did the leg work on the references to get to this point, the debate is not about my entitlement, it's about whether the infantry school wants to pay for it. If they don't, then they'll just bring me back to Gagetown. If they say no, that they won't pay, then I'm just going to find an apartment in order to stay here. However, until they say no, I can't get an apartment because I absolutely don't want to waive the opportunity to get free food and shelter and 6400 dollars. I don't understand what else I'm supposed to do. My primary goal is to save as much money as possible in order to pay down debt as quickly as possible. The only way to achieve that goal is to minimize expenses and maximize income. At the moment my income is as high as it's going to get, I'm working on a great gay werewolf fiction story and lifting so that I can whore myself on the internet. I'm also going to leverage another contact in the area to get a part-time job in security, but in order to get licensed here I need an address. So my only choice, within the constraint of my goal, is to more or less dramatically minimize expenses. Getting a motel room every night would be great and normal and stuff, but it would be insanely expensive. I'm getting snarky about comments telling me that it's all my fault, because it really just seems like the most rational thing that I could do. Getting a motel room and eating fine meats and produce would make absolutely no sense given the financial goal that I've set. I could do anything, but it only makes sense to do what I'm doing. I hope that makes my reasoning more clear.
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 14:32
|
|
|
I think what's obvious to everyone else but not to you is that there's an order of priorities that supersedes debt repayment. Like shelter.
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 14:39
|
|
|
tuyop posted:To clarify, I make do and manage to sleep indoors every night. I have a great network of friends and coworkers and people who owe me favors all over the place and they've really done a lot to keep me sane and alive for the past two or three months. Can we just accept the fact that he is not sleeping outside, or in his car and move on from the loving shelter thing? You're all acting like sleeping on someone's couch until the living situation gets worked out by bureaucrats is the worst idea ever. Is there a better way to do this aside from spending unnecessary money on shelter that he doesn't need because he has some?
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 16:20
|
|
|
I think part of it is that Tuyop presents himself as a helpless victim of the bureaucracy. While I definitely understand how insane bureaucracies can be, my experience is that you can have a lot more success if you take responsibility for navigating it yourself; don't rely on the advice of clerks and petty officials, but rather read all the documents and forms and rules and so on carefully, make notes if necessary, and don't accept it when someone looks at you blankly and says "you can't do that" when you know you're entitled to something. Now it's conceivable that Tuyop is actually doing all that. But very simple things like "I didn't do my taxes" and "I thought I'd get a refund but actually I owe money plus late fees" strongly suggest that he prefers to be passive about things like this. Personally I'm really not at all bothered by him couch surfing for a few days while he gets his army-provided quarters lined up or whatever. I'm more annoyed at a combination of blatant disregard for a very basic financially-important task that literally every working adult knows they need to do, combined with a tendency to flippantly overreact whenever someone criticizes him after he admits to yet another fuckup ("Oh I guess according to the internet I should just go die because I'm a horrible person eh?") which is an obvious attempt to redirect and dismiss people. Given that he posted this thread, and updates this thread, and this is a forum about getting advice and feedback, I find that baffling. If you don't like the feedback you're getting, fine, nobody can make you do anything: but don't act like you didn't solicit it. And if you throw out really brief statements that leave out all the important details, poo poo like "welp I'm stuck in the rain with nowhere to go", you know, you should expect people to take what you said at face value and assume you're literally homeless in the rain with nowhere to go.
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 19:21
|
|
|
tuyop posted:I'm working on a great gay werewolf fiction story and lifting so that I can whore myself on the internet. Would it be possible to get a sneak preview of this story?
|
|
#
?
Sep 21, 2012 23:23
|
|
|
I found a place and did a sort of irresponsible thing. The apartment is a 20km drive/ride away from work. 1.5 bedroom, 550 square feet, 860 per month power, heat, water, ac included. Ensuite washer and drier. I figure we could rent out the other room if we need to. I want to but toeshoes doesn't. My old running shoes that I was using to bike with were lost because they were stinky and I forgot that I left them under my car in a grocery bag. So I bought a set of clipless pedals and biking shoes from a local bike store. It cost 280 dollars. I justified the purchase in the following ways: - I use my bike every day, I put more mileage on it than my car. - My running shoes were terrible for biking and made my feet numb and left lumps on the balls of my feet. Another cheap pair of shoes would have done the same thing and probably caused a blood clot or something. - I will be using my bike until I upgrade to a modern road bike next year, when I do that I'll need to put clipless pedals on it anyway, but I already have them now, much like the tire situation from July. - Compared to a 650 dollar car repair, a 280 dollar bike upgrade/repair felt like absolutely nothing. But, I should have waited for next pay to get the pedals, or maybe hung the bike up for the winter and gone with carpooling until spring. I'm sure I'll survive though. I also need to buy a bed, I'm thinking of putting one on the zero interest, equal payments Canex plan. Probably along with winter tires in November. With all the Gucci bike poo poo I've bought, my savings aren't where I thought they'd be. I am aware that sparing no expense on the bike makes very little sense in light of sleeping on couches to save 40 dollars a day for the nice quarters.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 03:56
|
|
|
Probably didn't need clipless pedals, coulda just got harder shoes dude, and you're going to need to repair your car anyways, you can only drive around with garbage bags and cardboard for so long.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 04:37
|
|
|
Clipless can be done cheaper than that by far. Otherwise normal shows and power straps are still just as cheap. This is why people make fun of you. We can't get through even a few normal days without manic decisions.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 04:45
|
|
|
You could have bought flat pedals for $20. You really need to think poo poo through man.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 05:24
|
|
|
tuyop posted:Compared to a 650 dollar car repair, a 280 dollar bike upgrade/repair felt like absolutely nothing. This sort of rationalization is a certain and inevitable pathway to bankruptcy. It is indisputable proof that you have not actually learned a goddamn thing.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 05:59
|
|
|
Hey, it's a lot cheaper than the vacation he (assuredly) was considering!
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 07:39
|
|
|
So Tuyop, let's hear about this brand-new, top-of-the-line road bike you're getting next year! 
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 07:58
|
|
|
With the induced eye rolling by the middle of your post, probably no one made it to this point:tuyop posted:I also need to buy a bed, I'm thinking of putting one on the zero interest, equal payments Canex plan. Probably along with winter tires in November. With all the Gucci bike poo poo I've bought, my savings aren't where I thought they'd be. Ya think?
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 08:29
|
|
|
tuyop posted:I found a place and did a sort of irresponsible thing. You are a stupid, impulsive child.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 10:17
|
|
|
I hope someone steals your bike. I like it when bad things happen to bad people.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 10:28
|
|
|
tuyop posted:- I use my bike every day, I put more mileage on it than my car. But you're still going to have to get your car repaired for winter aren't you? Have you gotten the damage fixed or is the 650 dollars for the winter tires alone? Also I would caution anyone living in an area that snows consistently in winter from assuming all will be fine until November. Leperflesh posted:( You are bad at clearly communicating your situation.) This. I don't know if you're just bad at writing down the important details, can't be arsed to do so, or what but it makes it hard to read your situation accurately. Nether Postlude fucked around with this message at 11:45 on Sep 25, 2012 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 11:38
|
|
|
/\/\ I got the car repaired the same day. I was 1000 dollars away from the emergency fund and buffer again so it just came out of my checking. Yeah, you guys are right.  I'm feeling a lot of buyer's remorse at this point. I was planning on getting a road bike after I get rid of the car in April. In other news, I called veteran's affairs. The military is taking full medical responsibility for my injury, so I get coverage for my esoteric back pills forever. The financial payout is decided in the next three months, so maybe November. I'll probably have to see a doctor who will confirm everything. tuyop fucked around with this message at 11:49 on Sep 25, 2012 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 11:43
|
|
|
tuyop posted:Yeah, you guys are right. Here's a suggestion: Everytime you buy something that costs more than $25, post here first and get 'permission' from us. Or ask Twoshoes if she will let you spend your pocket money on it. It sounds a bit silly, but it can really work. Not just because we will yell at you if it is a stupid buy, but because it will force you to a) not impulse buy and b) make a conscious decision to evaluate a purchase before it happens.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 11:48
|
|
|
It's not at all ominous that Tuyop - the man who should not move - just bought himself some fancy biking shoes that lock him to the bike.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 17:45
|
|
|
spog posted:Here's a suggestion: Similarly, Tuyop, open a second account with a new card and only put like $200 on there at a time. Use that for all your stupid poo poo, and don't opt for overdraw protection. Even if you can't track your own budget in your head over the month, when it fails to swipe you'll know you've hosed up and/or have hit your Stupid poo poo limit for the month. While it's pretty simple and instant to go on the bank site and transfer another allocation over, hopefully it will make you think twice about why you need to fill up your card again and if you're making the right purchase choices. Also, it will reduce your risk of theft because it also forces you to periodically go look at the account and there's never much in there. Be sure to not get overdraw safety or they'll knock you a $15 fee and just take from another account. You want that swipe to fail.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2012 18:25
|
|
|
Zo posted:I hope someone steals your bike. Reading this thread must be like taking a vacation for you then.
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 11:47
|
|
|
So what should I do about a mattress? I can probably afford a 700 dollar one out of pocket, but I'll be very broke for the next couple of weeks. I kind of see three options: 1. Buy/get a used one. I also have to figure out delivery this way. 2. Buy new at a liquidation store or outlet. 3. Buy new at the Canex and minimize risk while paying like 200 dollars more than liquidation prices in order to spread the payments out over 12-24 months. Really, 2 and 3 are where I'm going to go. I think if the liquidation price is over 250 dollars less than the Canex price for the same model, it's too good to pass up. What do you guys think?
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 15:26
|
|
|
Are you moved into your new apartment yet? Aren't you still in a car or couch surfing between spots? What size of mattress are you looking at? Do you have sheets and box springs and a bed frame already or do you need all that as well? Hell, get an air mattress and rock out on one of those for a bit to let your finances recover. You'll spend under $100, have somewhere to sleep and can spend a few months saving up funds for a bigger purchase. Besides, it's not very clear in this thread if you have been transferred to your final posting or not so having less baggage to lug around would be a great idea. Once you're settled somewhere you plan to live for 5+ years at a stretch, that's the time to look at furniture.
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 17:16
|
|
|
tuyop posted:So what should I do about a mattress? I can probably afford a 700 dollar one out of pocket, but I'll be very broke for the next couple of weeks. I kind of see three options: Do mattresses really cost that much more in Canada? I may have different expectations, but I'm still on the same $200 Ikea queen-size mattress that I had in college, and I sleep fine. I don't know if bedbugs are an issue where you are, but I would avoid used mattresses for sure. I think the air mattress is a great idea for where you are. You can transport it with you when you're living in your car again when things go wrong!
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 17:31
|
|
|
tuyop posted:So what should I do about a mattress? I can probably afford a 700 dollar one out of pocket, but I'll be very broke for the next couple of weeks. I kind of see three options: The thought of a used one nauseates me. You had spoken in the past about your mattress situation. I thought you and TwoShoes were getting an apartment together though. What is she sleeping on?
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 17:39
|
|
|
Is your back injury a concern/limitation on what you can sleep on without issue? I'm surprised you've been able to couchsurf this long without it being a serious issue.
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 17:39
|
|
|
Get your doctor to prescribe a medical mattress and then have Canadian health care money pay for it? (I have no idea if that's a thing, but if there's any chance it is, by all means pursue it.)
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 17:46
|
|
|
I guess I should explain the details a little bit. We take possession of the apartment Saturday morning, and plan on sleeping there Saturday night and moving our stuff in this weekend. Right now we donÂ’t have a mattress or any furniture or plates or anything. I thought I was going to get my furniture and effects moved here, but it turns out I canÂ’t, so theyÂ’re still in long term storage with the army. This last week I decided to pay the 10 dollars a night and sleep in transient quarters because my back has been getting really bad from the couches. WeÂ’re looking at a queen size, box spring is included in the ones weÂ’ve looked at so far but we need one as well. I think that weÂ’re either going to wait on the bed frame or not get one at all. We need sheets and pillowcases (Walmart or Giant Tiger for sure). This is not my final posting, or really a posting at all. IÂ’m in some weird administrative grey zone that nobody is willing to clarify, including me. If I draw entitlements or try to fall into some other defined administrative category before May or so, then IÂ’ll get sent back to Gagetown. I donÂ’t want to go back to Gagetown without the girlfriend. In May, toeshoes gets posted, weÂ’re thinking Gagetown would be the best posting for both of us right now, but weÂ’re still working it out. I canÂ’t believe I didnÂ’t think of the air mattress before. IÂ’ll run that by toeshoes. One of the main reasons that weÂ’re considering buying furniture is that everything that gets moved into this apartment will be moved by the army the next time toeshoes gets posted, which is May. So, in effect, this is our permanent furniture and we feel like itÂ’s time to start shopping for a real set of stuff. Finances permitting, of course (which they donÂ’t right now). now). Mod edit: your keyboard did weird things with apostrophes \/\/ yeah we haven't even gone into those places. Just outlets and liquidators and poo poo. The one we want is 700 with box spring includes. tuyop fucked around with this message at 19:22 on Sep 28, 2012 |
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 18:19
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 7, 2024 03:40 |
|
|
Dude you can get a really nice mattress and boxspring taxes in brand new for $700. Shop harder, and not at Sears or Sleep Country or whatever. You want to go to Discount Mattress or Mattress Superstore etc. It's the same poo poo without the markup. I paid $400 for my queen set (with frame) and it's not the greatest bed but I've used it for five years without issue.
|
|
#
?
Sep 28, 2012 19:11
|
|
