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I'm not sure if I should be all  or  at the direction this thread has taken lately.
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Mar 18, 2013 16:37
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:24 |
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Breath Ray is running that Full Kit Wankers twitter and is fishing for content.
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Mar 18, 2013 16:41
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Haha is that really a thing? I'll have to check it out. Don't worry though I would never reprint your pics. e. Finn... https://twitter.com/WankersFullKit/status/310710772026195969/photo/1
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Mar 18, 2013 16:47
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When playing 5's, I narrowly avoid the horrible situation of being a #fullkitwanker by combining bright red liverpool home socks with my maroon west indies cricket strip.  #defencelikeBrianCharlesLara
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Mar 18, 2013 17:46
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I think it's ok if you're playing or even if you're at a game in some cases but to wear a football shirt to go to Asda is demented.
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Mar 18, 2013 17:48
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Halloween Jack posted:I'm new to the sport, what does this mean? I play 5 a side so I'd say it's a lot more relaxed when it comes to playing fixed positions and a lot of people take this as being free reign to be super selfish and that's wrong because as Esposito's already explained, it's still very much a team game. I mean this guy would literally shoot as soon as he got the ball and it was really loving annoying argh I'm raging just remembering how annoying he was.
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Mar 18, 2013 20:26
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Esposito posted:The second example sounds like a guy I used to play with, who was decent dribbler but just didn't know when he should give up and pass the ball to someone in a better position. The game would slow to a crawl while he pulled the ball behind his legs and changed direction ten times without any penetration. This, loving this. Even worse is that this guy is the nicest guy in the world and has insane ball skills, so you can't really get mad at him. But he's in his 40s, is slow, can't really run for long, and tries too hard to get in a perfect position to shoot. In any case he'll occasionally score and has scored all our penalties, so it could be a lot worse. But, goddamn, you have 4 out of 5 guys on you, pass the ball to one of the 3 wide-open people.
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Mar 18, 2013 20:37
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Fryhtaning posted:This, loving this. Even worse is that this guy is the nicest guy in the world and has insane ball skills, so you can't really get mad at him. But he's in his 40s, is slow, can't really run for long, and tries too hard to get in a perfect position to shoot. In any case he'll occasionally score and has scored all our penalties, so it could be a lot worse. But, goddamn, you have 4 out of 5 guys on you, pass the ball to one of the 3 wide-open people. We currently have a guy in our rec team who will, once per game (usually very early on), go on a weaving, stepover-filled run and score. Then for the entire remainder of the game he will drop back into a defensive mid position and barely move out of a 5-foot radius, no matter what happens. People yell at him constantly about it and he just doesn't care. Unfortunately, the guy who invited him to play with us is a great player and a nice guy and we're afraid we'll lose him if we get rid of his lazy friend.
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Mar 18, 2013 21:09
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That guy sounds like exactly what you would want.
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Mar 18, 2013 21:11
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CaptainRightful posted:We currently have a guy in our rec team who will, once per game (usually very early on), go on a weaving, stepover-filled run and score. Then for the entire remainder of the game he will drop back into a defensive mid position and barely move out of a 5-foot radius, no matter what happens. People yell at him constantly about it and he just doesn't care.
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Mar 18, 2013 21:22
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Chas McGill posted:This is me. Or pretty much. I go on a few runs and then move back and 'influence the tempo of the game' by shuffling around laterally.
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Mar 18, 2013 21:30
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Get your out of shape asses back into tiptop shape and start making more runs so the players like me who are fit and absolute poo poo at dribbling and scoring aren't making all the runs up the pitch and giving the ball away every time ffs.
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Mar 18, 2013 21:36
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Maybe I didn't make clear exactly how little he moves. He shuts down no opposing strikers. He makes no attempt to win loose balls or even get on the end of a pass that isn't directly at his feet. And when he does receive the ball, he looks directly at his feet and doesn't attempt a pass until two defenders are right on top of him (and almost always dispossess him). In short, he doesn't even "influence the tempo of the game" any more than if there happened to be a small tree stump in our half of the pitch. If he at least stood in front of the opposing goal and cherry-picked, he would be useful. And I'm pretty sure he's still in his 20s.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:00
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At least he stops breakaways, the source of over 80% of 5-a-side goals.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:01
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Breath Ray posted:At least he stops breakaways, the source of over 80% of 5-a-side goals. Except he doesn't? And this is 11v11 full-field Spring through Fall, 7v7 indoor during Winter.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:03
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I feel like we're only getting half the story here
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Mar 18, 2013 22:06
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I mean no offence. But as a consumate ball-hogger myself who generally runs out of puff after 5 minutes I can relate to the guy.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:16
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We had a player on our team whose name was Pancho, and whenever he got the ball he'd just run and run toward goal and never pass, well one of the guys on our team got fed up and ran him down from behind and slide tackled him pretty brutally, and he stopped going on gallops. The ref laughed. And it was funny as hell. And everyone always called him Pinche Pancho which i think means loving lousy pancho. Slide tackle your team mates.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:23
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CaptainRightful posted:Maybe I didn't make clear exactly how little he moves. He shuts down no opposing strikers. He makes no attempt to win loose balls or even get on the end of a pass that isn't directly at his feet. And when he does receive the ball, he looks directly at his feet and doesn't attempt a pass until two defenders are right on top of him (and almost always dispossess him). In short, he doesn't even "influence the tempo of the game" any more than if there happened to be a small tree stump in our half of the pitch. If he at least stood in front of the opposing goal and cherry-picked, he would be useful. Yeah I'm with Breath Ray - we're not getting the full story here. I'd fall loving flat on my face if I tried a weaving step-over goal-scoring run, so this guy knows how to move his feet. I've been fat and out of shape before and I could even then keep up with a casual game. He either gives exactly zero fucks or he hates getting attention from other people, even if for something good. Oh god he's a goon isn't he?
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Mar 18, 2013 22:46
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Yeah, maybe he's got narcolepsy you insensitive pig! e. Can I just say how much I love Full Kit Wankers, good work MessyAss.
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Mar 18, 2013 22:47
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please respond posted:We had a player on our team whose name was Pancho, and whenever he got the ball he'd just run and run toward goal and never pass, well one of the guys on our team got fed up and ran him down from behind and slide tackled him pretty brutally, and he stopped going on gallops. The ref laughed. And it was funny as hell. And everyone always called him Pinche Pancho which i think means loving lousy pancho. Slide tackle your team mates. ahahah yeeesssssss I almost did this in a league match a while back, but the professional repercussions would have been too much
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Mar 18, 2013 23:02
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Redundant posted:I call it the "Pirlo roll" and pretend that it's tactical as opposed to it being due to my crippling lack of fitness. Fryhtaning posted:Get your out of shape asses back into tiptop shape and start making more runs so the players like me who are fit and absolute poo poo at dribbling and scoring aren't making all the runs up the pitch and giving the ball away every time ffs. I really should get in shape though, since running at goal is generally more fun than ambling around and watching the game go by. Fryhtaning posted:Yeah I'm with Breath Ray - we're not getting the full story here. I'd fall loving flat on my face if I tried a weaving step-over goal-scoring run, so this guy knows how to move his feet. I've been fat and out of shape before and I could even then keep up with a casual game. He either gives exactly zero fucks or he hates getting attention from other people, even if for something good. Edit: I have a cold and I'm playing on wednesday. I might put Vics on my 2002 Senegal top. Chas McGill fucked around with this message at 23:10 on Mar 18, 2013 |
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Mar 18, 2013 23:03
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Fryhtaning posted:Yeah I'm with Breath Ray - we're not getting the full story here. I'd fall loving flat on my face if I tried a weaving step-over goal-scoring run, so this guy knows how to move his feet. I've been fat and out of shape before and I could even then keep up with a casual game. He either gives exactly zero fucks or he hates getting attention from other people, even if for something good. My guess is that he once played at college or club level but now he's incredibly out of shape and gives zero fucks. This is why I'd prefer he left the team.
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Mar 18, 2013 23:06
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Yeah this guy is basically me lol. I was pretty good in my youth and even had the proverbial try out for Chelsea (this was in the 90s when they weren't nearly so successful) but I was deemed too small and flimsy and my dad wouldn't have let me do it anyway. Now I delight in scoring goals by hitting the ball as softly and deftly as I dare and I'm one of those infuriating mercurial talents who is more about HOW the goal is scored than how many times. I always play with a big smile on my face because I find it fun rather than cathartic to play football 
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Mar 18, 2013 23:20
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Definitely not inviting you to one of my games now, Craig.
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Mar 18, 2013 23:32
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Breath Ray posted:
I don't think this post could be any more English than it is.
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Mar 19, 2013 04:19
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Haha, I suppose I am a bit English. Good thing we have the common language of football to communicate! Now who is up for some pics. We need 1 more person before I make that What Are You Playing In Today kit thread.
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Mar 19, 2013 11:11
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Breath Ray posted:Haha, I suppose I am a bit English. Good thing we have the common language of football to communicate! Now who is up for some pics. We need 1 more person before I make that What Are You Playing In Today kit thread. We do also have the common language of English to communicate. Just make your thread already or post photos in here though man, stop stringing it out!
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Mar 19, 2013 11:24
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So do you guys wear all in one pads or separates? I bought separates and generally just wear the ankle guards.
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Mar 19, 2013 11:26
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My only protection is oversized socks that bunch up around my ankles.
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Mar 19, 2013 12:18
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I play casual futsal, so like Mr McGill I only use socks, which occasionally have additional padding on the sole and heel.
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Mar 19, 2013 12:21
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Breath Ray posted:So do you guys wear all in one pads or separates? I bought separates and generally just wear the ankle guards. I use child size shin pads. I have those sleeves that you can slip them into. Only literal babbies use the all in one shin pads with the ankle guards.
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Mar 19, 2013 17:52
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I use all in one's because my ankles are weak as poo poo and need the support. I could probably just get a separate ankle support but 
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Mar 19, 2013 18:21
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Shrapnac posted:I use child size shin pads. I have those sleeves that you can slip them into. Only literal babbies use the all in one shin pads with the ankle guards. i wear them because the game at my age/level is not about speed and looking cool anymore, it's about not breaking myself and preventing me from earning a living at the real job. The last thing I want is not to be able to go into the office because some dipshit who is a lot worse than he thinks he is comes in at my ankles on a cold wet Tuesday night in Seattle.
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Mar 19, 2013 20:00
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Party in the UAE posted:i wear them because the game at my age/level is not about speed and looking cool anymore, it's about not breaking myself and preventing me from earning a living at the real job. The last thing I want is not to be able to go into the office because some dipshit who is a lot worse than he thinks he is comes in at my ankles on a cold wet Tuesday night in Seattle. I had an indoor game a few years ago where a teammate asked me beforehand why I bothered wearing shinguards. A little later one of our opponents left the game with a golf ball sized bruise on his shin and I felt quite vindicated
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Mar 19, 2013 20:05
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Party in the UAE posted:i wear them because the game at my age/level is not about speed and looking cool anymore, it's about not breaking myself and preventing me from earning a living at the real job. The last thing I want is not to be able to go into the office because some dipshit who is a lot worse than he thinks he is comes in at my ankles on a cold wet Tuesday night in Seattle. That's why I stopped playing in a local co-ed 7v7 league. Too many dumbass parents whose train of thought is "well my 6 year old plays soccer, how hard can it be?" who have no control over their bodies and don't know what to do on the field. Those leagues are so much more dangerous than the organized leagues I've played in where the people on the field have actually played the game for an extended period of their lives.
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Mar 19, 2013 20:11
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Shrapnac posted:That's why I stopped playing in a local co-ed 7v7 league. Too many dumbass parents whose train of thought is "well my 6 year old plays soccer, how hard can it be?" who have no control over their bodies and don't know what to do on the field. My biggest danger is people who have played the game some but aren't as fast as they think they are anymore, so instead of getting the ball, they get the space where the ball used to be, which is often my ankles/shins.
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Mar 19, 2013 20:25
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Xylorjax posted:My biggest danger is people who have played the game some but aren't as fast as they think they are anymore, so instead of getting the ball, they get the space where the ball used to be, which is often my ankles/shins. this
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Mar 19, 2013 21:02
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Breath Ray posted:Haha, I suppose I am a bit English. Good thing we have the common language of football to communicate! Now who is up for some pics. We need 1 more person before I make that What Are You Playing In Today kit thread. im in man, Start That Thread
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Mar 19, 2013 21:53
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Hardfl1p posted:im in man, Start That Thread Man city 2012 "Kompany 4" away shirt with the away socks, unrelated black Adidas shorts to avoid full kit wankerdom. Nike t90s. Pink Fernando Torres style hair band I found after a co-rec game because it makes me feel empowered. A few weeks ago we played the other "red" team in the league and they were supposed to play in white but none of them brought white shirts. They all had on this year's united tablecloth kit and we volunteered to play in white and I was mad, real mad.
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Mar 19, 2013 22:54
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