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feminist killjoy
Dec 12, 2012

Phobophilia posted:

Luckily it never actually does that and the fear of them smacks of a whole range of culture-bound syndromes such as your dick disappearing into itself.

Weird, I have totally read that wikipedia page on Koro. It must have come up while I was reading about vagina dentata. Actually, for me, I guess that's not so weird.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina_dentata

Associated film that may be of interest-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(film)

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monkeytennis
Apr 26, 2007


Toilet Rascal

Tibor posted:

If you're into the whole nuclear apocalypse thing you should read 'On The Beach' by Nevil Shute. It starts off fairly slowly but that just helps to build a creeping sense of inevitability. Then you reach the last 20 or so pages and you sob like an infant and feel distraught for the rest of the week (if you're me).

Seconding this, it's a great read.

Mans
Sep 14, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

pienipple posted:

Thanks to this thread I watched When the Wind Blows, Threads, and There Will Come Soft Rains back to back.

:smithicide:

Then you're ready for Come and See!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Come_and_see

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




feminist killjoy posted:

I haven't seen any mention of these little bloodsuckers. Possible penile amputation as a preventative measure could be unnerving to some...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru

I so enjoyed how this entry focused on the possibility that the parasite could enter the male urethra, while at the same time pretty much dismissing the fact that there were documented cases of the candiru invading vaginas. Having a parasitic catfish lodge itself into your vagina is still scary as gently caress.

That reminds of River Monsters with Jeremy Wade which is pretty much concentrated:stare::

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6A7lA-BQQcs

TurboTax
Oct 9, 2012
One really intriguing idea for a post-nuclear war film would be to focus on how the Swiss would come out of it. They wouldn't just be unlikely to have to deal with any nuclear strikes (unless I'm wrong about that); they also have more than enough shelters for everyone in the country, plenty of guns, and the ability to dynamite all or most of the key access points into the country. So if the surrounding countries were dealing with Threads-type scenarios, might they end up essentially taking control of some of them, if not politically then economically? Or would they just stay where they were, deal as best as they could with the nuclear winter and whatever else, and work on rebuilding their country?

It'd make sense if there had been a novel or even a TV movie with this premise at some point, so if anyone happened to know of anything that'd be great.

MatildaTheHun
Aug 31, 2011

here's the thing donovan, I'm always hungry
They'd all die from radiation sickness. They're in the dead center of Europe. Hell, they probably had Soviet missiles pointed at them.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.
Can't have all that gold go unirradiated after all.

The fallout and nuclear winter would probably have hosed them up good in any case.

monkeytennis
Apr 26, 2007


Toilet Rascal

Mans posted:

Then you're ready for Come and See!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Come_and_see

You're just going to keep it up until he's broken aren't you! I watched that when I was about 14, you can imagine the effect it had, watching it late at night with the lights off and headphones on so my parents thought I was asleep. I'm now 40, and have never watched it again, and never want to. There aren't many films I can say that about.

Hovermoose
Jul 27, 2010

This has probably already been mentioned but it fits with the current trend of nuclear war. Acute Radiation Syndrome.

The so called 'walking ghost phase' of ARS is a period during which people who have been exposed to lethal amounts of ionizing radiation seem to be in good health, sometimes lasting as long as a week, before their system crashes completely and they quickly succumb to the health problems caused associated with radiation. The reason this happens is due to which cells are most vulnerable to the radiation. These cells are the fast growing ones found in places such as the bone marrow and the gastrointestinal tract. While the death of these cells cause huge health problems, the effect 'lags' a bit due to the fact that the body still has white blood cells circulating in the blood stream and that these have to be used up first. The diarrhea associated with ARS stems from the dead cells which have to slough of the walls of the intestines before they pass through the rest of the digestive system.

The though that a person that has been fatally poisoned by radiation can still appear somewhat healthy on the outside while their body is falling apart inside is deeply disturbing for me. Imagine what it must be like to go through that. You seem healthy, then suddenly you just crash and die a horrible death

TurboTax
Oct 9, 2012

FrozenVent posted:

Can't have all that gold go unirradiated after all.

The fallout and nuclear winter would probably have hosed them up good in any case.

Yeah, I suppose even if many of them were able to stay in the shelters long enough to avoid the fallout, they'd still be likely to run out of food before the nuclear winter ended.

It's just interesting to wonder what they'd do with themselves if they were somehow left semi-intact, though (like say if those newer nuclear weapons were used, which aren't supposed to cause as much of a nuclear winter), and how they'd deal with all the ruined civilizations around them.

ArchangeI
Jul 15, 2010

TurboTax posted:

Yeah, I suppose even if many of them were able to stay in the shelters long enough to avoid the fallout, they'd still be likely to run out of food before the nuclear winter ended.

It's just interesting to wonder what they'd do with themselves if they were somehow left semi-intact, though (like say if those newer nuclear weapons were used, which aren't supposed to cause as much of a nuclear winter), and how they'd deal with all the ruined civilizations around them.

I'm pretty sure the Swiss was on the "nuke just in case" list for both sides. Making sure everyone is on the same level of being an irradiated hellscape was a thing in nuclear planning.

pienipple
Mar 20, 2009

That's wrong!

Mans posted:

Then you're ready for Come and See!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Come_and_see

I have work tomorrow, the crushing depression moviethon will have to continue next weekend.

I need to watch The War Game since "the effect of the film has been judged by the BBC to be too horrifying for the medium of broadcasting." and I suppose Come and See.

RideTheSpiral
Sep 18, 2005
College Slice
After plowing though 60 pages of this thread I have now developed a fear of the human race, mild agoraphobia and am suffering from a moderate existential crisis regarding the fragility of human life and the eventual heat death of the universe. Thanks thread!


Well onward into the void, I suppose.


The 1955 Le Mans disaster.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1955_Le_Mans_disaster

quote:

The 1955 Le Mans disaster occurred during the 1955 24 Hours of Le Mans motor race, when a crash caused large pieces of racing car debris to fly into the crowd. Eighty-three spectators and driver Pierre Levegh died at the scene, whilst 120 more were injured in the most catastrophic accident in motorsport history.


Perhaps the most disturbing thing about the crash was the fact the race was not stopped due to perceived issues with the emergency vehicle access, so the drivers kept racing, not know exactly what was going on with the enormous pile of corpses on the main straight. :stare:


:nms: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXtb5eDUuQw :nms:

jalopybrown
Oct 11, 2012

That's insane, has their been any other crashes that have come close to that many people killed by one car?

quote:

The bonnet decapitated tightly jammed spectators like a guillotine. With the front of the spaceframe chassis—and thus crucial engine mounts—destroyed, the car's heavy engine block also broke free and hurtled into the crowd. Spectators who had climbed onto trestle tables to get a better view of the track found themselves in the direct path of the lethal debris.

RideTheSpiral
Sep 18, 2005
College Slice

jalopybrown posted:

That's insane, has their been any other crashes that have come close to that many people killed by one car?


I can't recall any that have killed more than one.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VtQ9Uc062M

If you can find this BBC film it is definitely worth watching. It documents how insane motor-racing was before modern safety precautions (very insane).

Mans
Sep 14, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

RideTheSpiral posted:


The 1955 Le Mans disaster.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Pryce

RideTheSpiral posted:

Pryce was directly behind Stuck's car along the main straight, Stuck himself sensed Van Vuuren and moved to the right to avoid both marshals, missing Bill by what Tremayne reports to have been a matter of "millimetres". From his position directly behind Stuck, Pryce could not see Van Vuuren and was unable to react as quickly as Stuck had done. He struck the teenage marshal at approximately 270 km/h (170 mph). Van Vuuren was thrown into the air and landed yards in front of Zorzi and Bill. He died upon impact, his body being literally torn in half by Pryce's car.[42] The fire extinguisher he had been carrying smashed into Pryce's head, before striking the Shadow's roll hoop. The force of the impact was such that the extinguisher was thrown up and over the adjacent grandstand. It came to ground in the car park to the rear of the stand, where it hit a parked car and jammed its door shut.[41]

The impact with the fire extinguisher had wrenched Pryce's helmet upward sharply, and he had been partially decapitated by the strap. Death was almost certainly instantaneous. Pryce's Shadow DN8, now with its driver dead at the wheel, continued at speed down the main straight towards the first corner, called Crowthorne. The car left the track towards the right, scraping the metal barriers before veering back onto the track after hitting an entrance for emergency vehicles. It then hit Jacques Laffite's Ligier, sending both Pryce and Laffite head-on into the barriers. Van Vuuren's injuries were so severe that, initially, his body was only identified after the race director had summoned all of the race marshals and he was not among them.[43]

I'm not going to give youtube links in respect of the dead.

Khazar-khum
Oct 22, 2008

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
2nd Battalion

RideTheSpiral posted:

I can't recall any that have killed more than one.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VtQ9Uc062M

If you can find this BBC film it is definitely worth watching. It documents how insane motor-racing was before modern safety precautions (very insane).

Seconding this. The parts where Jackie Stewart talks are amazingly horrifying: having to tape a spanner onto his steering wheel in case of a crash, fighting for ambulances and medics to be on-site, etc.

Buzkashi
Feb 4, 2003
College Slice
As long as we're discussing awful nuclear stuff, check out Barefoot Gen. There have been a couple of film adaptations of the book, including an animated version in 1983 that has a pretty horrific sequence of the bomb falling on Hiroshima.

Aulus
Mar 7, 2005

Le monde entier!
Est un cactus!
Il est impossible de s'asseoir!
Somewhat related:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_broadcast_system

The tests profoundly creeped me out when I saw them on TV as a kid. Apparently by design:

quote:

The Attention Signal most commonly associated with the system was a combination of the sine waves of 853 and 960 Hz, an interval suited to getting the audience's collective attention due to its unpleasantness on the human ear.

Red Bones
Aug 9, 2012

"I think he's a bad enough person to stay ghost through his sheer love of child-killing."

I find wikipedia's sandwich list unnerving because its incredibly long and instead of the standard wiki list page of just a big alphabetical list of hyperlinks, its a comprehensive table where sandwiches are listed with images, names, countries of origin and descriptions. The idea that people have spent days creating this list and finding images and everything for something as mundane as sandwiches is impressive in a slightly scary way.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours

Mr. Pumroy posted:

Welp, yeah that was pretty grim. The Day After didn't get nearly as dark.

I keep wondering if people remember how hopeless The Day After got at the end. It doesn't have the grey trash-heap nightmare setting of Threads but all the storylines wrapping up at the end of that movie are awfully dark.

RideTheSpiral
Sep 18, 2005
College Slice

Red Bones posted:

I find wikipedia's sandwich list unnerving because its incredibly long and instead of the standard wiki list page of just a big alphabetical list of hyperlinks, its a comprehensive table where sandwiches are listed with images, names, countries of origin and descriptions. The idea that people have spent days creating this list and finding images and everything for something as mundane as sandwiches is impressive in a slightly scary way.


I quite enjoyed that article.


In a similar way to this one: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_lists_of_lists

Kanfy
Jan 9, 2012

Just gotta keep walking down that road.

Red Bones posted:

I find wikipedia's sandwich list unnerving because its incredibly long and instead of the standard wiki list page of just a big alphabetical list of hyperlinks, its a comprehensive table where sandwiches are listed with images, names, countries of origin and descriptions. The idea that people have spent days creating this list and finding images and everything for something as mundane as sandwiches is impressive in a slightly scary way.

I don't really see it, I mean thousands and thousands of people have written entire books (which have taken far more time than a few days) of basically every topic under the sky, including sandwiches and even sillier and more niche topics.

Now here's something more unnerving and, while it doesn't have a wikipedia article, I think it needs to be mentioned in this context; there's a certain fanfiction story about the Mass Effect video game series that numbers 3,404,854 words. Three point four million.

This is approximately six to seven times the amount of words found in all of the Lord of the Rings books combined.

Think about that for a while.

AnonSpore
Jan 19, 2012

"I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

Kanfy posted:

I don't really see it, I mean thousands and thousands of people have written entire books (which have taken far more time than a few days) of basically every topic under the sky, including sandwiches and even sillier and more niche topics.

Now here's something more unnerving and, while it doesn't have a wikipedia article, I think it needs to be mentioned in this context; there's a certain fanfiction story about the Mass Effect video game series that numbers 3,404,854 words. Three point four million.

This is approximately six to seven times the amount of words found in all of the Lord of the Rings books combined.

Think about that for a while.

Million+ word fanfiction pieces are nothing new. I remember seeing a 2.5+ million word Teen Titans fanfiction in a thread similar to this years ago.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours
It's this generation's version of automatic writing, I wouldn't think about it too much.

Humboldt Squid
Jan 21, 2006

Red Bones posted:

I find wikipedia's sandwich list unnerving because its incredibly long and instead of the standard wiki list page of just a big alphabetical list of hyperlinks, its a comprehensive table where sandwiches are listed with images, names, countries of origin and descriptions. The idea that people have spent days creating this list and finding images and everything for something as mundane as sandwiches is impressive in a slightly scary way.


:stonk:

The Monkey Man
Jun 10, 2012

HERD U WERE TALKIN SHIT
Did the "forever delitized" guy write that list of sandwiches?

13stitches
Mar 13, 2012

You were born free, you got fucked out of half of it and you wave a flag celebrating it.

RideTheSpiral posted:

I quite enjoyed that article.


In a similar way to this one: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_lists_of_lists


It's incredible what amount of lists Wikipedia amassed over the years, including a list detailing every football transfer in Denmark in the year 2009. Which in turn leads to an even longer list of said transfers and tons of articles to pretty much every one of those football players. Just to think of how much time it must have taken to compile such an amount of information is staggering.

13stitches has a new favorite as of 18:11 on May 28, 2013

CopywrightMMXI
Jun 1, 2011

One time a guy stole some downhill skis out of my jeep and I was so mad I punched a mailbox. I'm against crime, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

AnonSpore posted:

Million+ word fanfiction pieces are nothing new. I remember seeing a 2.5+ million word Teen Titans fanfiction in a thread similar to this years ago.

Last year in the wrestling web thread in PSP, someone linked to a site that had ongoing wrestling erotic fan-fiction going back at least 15 years. The author inserted herself into the storylines for WWE. It was really disturbing that anyone would put that much effort into something like that.

JiimyPopAli
Oct 5, 2009

Kanfy posted:

I don't really see it, I mean thousands and thousands of people have written entire books (which have taken far more time than a few days) of basically every topic under the sky, including sandwiches and even sillier and more niche topics.

Agreed, I found this one to be pretty interesting when most of the other pages are mostly :cry:

Jivesauce
Nov 22, 2007

jalopybrown posted:

That's insane, has their been any other crashes that have come close to that many people killed by one car?

Oh yeah, not as many as that, but there have been some awful spectator death tolls in the history of racing.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emilio_Materassi - Emilio Materassi and 21 spectators
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolfgang_Von_Trips - Count Von Crash and 15 spectators
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfonso_de_Portago - Alfonso de Portago and 10 spectators (5 children)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nino_Farina - Nino Farina (Nephew of Pinin Farina, famous coach builder) It doesn't say anything about it in the Wikipedia article, but he crashed into the crowd during the 1953 Argentine Grand Prix and killed at least 10 spectators; some estimate it as being significantly higher. He survived that crash and died in a road accident on the way to spectate a race 10 years after retiring.

That's mostly Grand Prix and sports car focused. There have been some equally nasty drag racing and off road racing accidents as well, but I'm not as familiar with those. I'm sure they wouldn't be hard to find though.

Vitamins
May 1, 2012


:nms: Here :nms: is the video of the Tom Pryce F1 crash if anyone is actually curious. It's not for the faint of heart.

In other motorsport related pages, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1986_World_Rally_Championship_season was the last season the extremely powerful Group B rally cars were allowed to race. At the Portuguese rally 3 spectators were killed when a driver lost control and plowed into the crowd. The final nail in the coffin was when another car left the track in Corsica and burst into flames, killing the driver and co-driver.

Nckdictator
Sep 8, 2006
Just..someone

TurboTax posted:

Yeah, I suppose even if many of them were able to stay in the shelters long enough to avoid the fallout, they'd still be likely to run out of food before the nuclear winter ended.

It's just interesting to wonder what they'd do with themselves if they were somehow left semi-intact, though (like say if those newer nuclear weapons were used, which aren't supposed to cause as much of a nuclear winter), and how they'd deal with all the ruined civilizations around them.

I know parts of Protect and Survive (the story, not the PSA) deal with Switzerland and the latter part has them venturing into the remains of West Germany.

http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=164027

Here's the relevant parts.

quote:




At midnight on the 2nd of June, Swiss soldiers move up the A-4 autoroute and slip across the Swiss/German border near the tiny village of Neuhaus. Although the exact point of transgression is unclear to the men in their armoured cars and respirators, it is common for those involved in Plan Bleu to describe an electricity running through them as they passed some unseen point in the journey.

Raised heartbeats aside, the initial incursion into what was once the Federal Republic of Germany is rather anti-climactic. Swiss Forces have entered an area that was fairly sparse and quiet even by pre-war standards. This is no coincidence, of course. Most of the road links across the border were blocked or destroyed, a task that the Swiss had planned for since at least the Second World War. As the first shots rang out across Germany, Swiss engineers brought grand tunnels down into themselves and blew huge chunks of picturesque mountain passes into the valleys below. The Swiss Government justified this as a precautionary measure in order to protect against 'Soviet aggression'; few doubted that the real reason was to stem the tide of refugees that had been heading into the Cantons since before the shooting started.

The events of those hectic days were to influence what the first Swiss visitors into Germany were to see. Simply put, they saw nothing. The little burgs and hamlets within a stone's throw of the Swiss border found themselves emptied during the build-up to nuclear conflict as their inhabitants were willing - and more importantly, able - to make it to the safety of the hills before the border was sealed. Thereby, the initial advance was uneventful. With each second of silence, however, concerns grew as to how the vaunted survivors would greet their belated 'rescuers'. At best, they could hope for a sullen response and a barely-concealed mixture of contempt and envy; at worst, they could expect payment in kind for what any German survivors would doubtless see as murder by default (thanks to their closing of the border) or indeed, murder by murder (the rumours about Swiss troops opening fire on columns of refugees are manifold and remain very, very difficult to prove or disprove objectively to this day. One interesting suggestion is that whilst Swiss troops did not have the stomach to open fire on their neighbours, they were willing to allow and even encourage the whispers about such massacres in order to deter as many people as possible from trying to approach their checkpoints.)

As dawn breaks above the chocolate-box wasteland, a sharp-eyed Swiss sentry spies a clue by the roadside. A summer flower and a cross.

Ludwig Woll 31.10.76 /// 24.5.84


...Within a few hours of discovering the makeshift grave of an eight year old boy, the Swiss Army begins encountering survivors. On the 4th of July, three individuals (two men and a woman) have been processed. By the 5th ,of July, this number has risen to seventy (although two of these rescued later died before reaching Switzerland; starvation and typhoid, respectively). Faced with an increasing number of German refugees, Swiss authorities open up their first processing camps at Wehr and Blumberg. For now, only seriously ill patients or 'Germans of special interest to the Swiss Government' are transported into Switzerland proper.

TurboTax
Oct 9, 2012

Nckdictator posted:

I know parts of Protect and Survive (the story, not the PSA) deal with Switzerland and the latter part has them venturing into the remains of West Germany.

http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=164027

Here's the relevant parts.

That's great – whoever wrote this certainly put some thought into it.

A Shitty Reporter
Oct 29, 2012
Dinosaur Gum

Phobophilia posted:

Luckily it never actually does that and the fear of them smacks of a whole range of culture-bound syndromes such as your dick disappearing into itself.

That reminds me of something that was in the same issue of Skeptic Magazine as an article about that: The Monkey Man. Obviously the thing wasn't real either, but the whole situation was pretty nasty. Folks were forming armed mobs trying to kill the thing, and others fell off buildings to their deaths while running away from what they thought was the Monkey Man. Can't find anything about the death, so that might have been something else though.

The Monkey Man
Jun 10, 2012

HERD U WERE TALKIN SHIT

No Your Other Left posted:

That reminds me of something that was in the same issue of Skeptic Magazine as an article about that: The Monkey Man. Obviously the thing wasn't real either...

Oh, really?

Mans
Sep 14, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Those drawings are loving adorable :3:

Hoopy Frood
May 1, 2008

Aulus posted:

Somewhat related:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_broadcast_system

The tests profoundly creeped me out when I saw them on TV as a kid. Apparently by design:

I have the same reaction to the tune played at the end of the UK Protect and Survive broadcasts when they show the logo. It's used well in Threads, because you can hear it on the broadcasts quite a few times in the background during some scenes.

Political Whores
Feb 13, 2012

I can't remember is Prosopagnosia(also known as "face blindness") has been posted yet, but it's always freaked me out. I was reminded of it by Arrested Development today.

quote:

Prosopagnosia (Greek: "prosopon" = "face", "agnosia" = "not knowing"), also called face blindness, is a disorder of face perception where the ability to recognize faces is impaired, while other aspects of visual processing (e.g., object discrimination) and intellectual functioning (e.g., decision making) remain intact. The term originally referred to a condition following acute brain damage (acquired prosopagnosia), but a congenital or developmental form of the disorder also exists, which may affect up to 2.5% of the population.[1] The specific brain area usually associated with prosopagnosia is the fusiform gyrus,[2] which activates specifically in response to faces. Thanks to this specialization, most people recognize faces much more effectively than they do similarly complex inanimate objects. For those with prosopagnosia, the ability to recognize faces depends on the less-sensitive object recognition system.

Basically, the part of the brain that does face recognition is damaged, so the effected individual is unable to recognize or remember faces. I find it weird to think about how much post-processing is going on in our brains on the images we see. Everything we experience is filtered through a bunch of evolutionary developed processors. Always makes me wonder about how much I can trust my perceptions.


For more fun, see Akinetopsia, also known as "motion blindness":

quote:

Akinetopsia, also known as cerebral akinetopsia or motion blindness, is an extremely rare neuropsychological disorder in which a patient cannot perceive motion in their visual field, despite being able to see stationary objects without issue. For patients with akinetopsia, the world becomes devoid of motion. Most of what is known about akinetopsia was learned through the case study of one patient, LM. There is currently no effective treatment or cure for akinetopsia.

Prosopagnosia sounds like it would suck, but be manageable. Akinetopsia sounds like it would be pure hell:

quote:

Akinetopsia is the inability to see motion despite normal spatial acuity, flicker detection, stereo and color vision. Other intact functions include visual space perception and visual identification of shapes, objects, and faces.[2] Besides simple perception, akinetopsia also disturbs visuomotor tasks, such as reaching for objects[3] and catching objects.[4] When doing tasks, feedback of one's own motion appears to be important.[4]
Patients with akinetopsia struggle with many issues in their day-to-day life, depending on the severity of their condition. One patient, LM, described pouring a cup of tea or coffee difficult "because the fluid appeared to be frozen, like a glacier".[5] She did not know when to stop pouring, because she could not perceive the movement of the fluid rising. LM and other patients have also complained of having trouble following conversations, because lip movements and changing facial expressions were missed.[5][6] LM stated she felt insecure when more than two people were walking around in a room: "people were suddenly here or there but I have not seen them moving".[5] Movement is inferred by comparing the change in position of an object or person. LM and others have described crossing the street and driving cars to also be of great difficulty.[5][6] LM started to train her hearing to estimate distance.

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I AM GRANDO
Aug 20, 2006

Mans posted:

Those drawings are loving adorable :3:

That police artist must have a night job working for Hallmark.

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