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luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.
There are a few people who work in the sex industry on SA and there seems to be a lot of interest in the industry and our specific jobs. While there is a lot of information available about sex industry workers, most of it is… wrong somehow. A lot of the "information" that you can find about strippers, full service sex workers, cam girls, phone sex operators etc. is written by people who are not in the industry or who were in the industry a long time ago. As well, the experience of being in the industry is so varied! I have had extremely different experiences city to city and can tell you decisively that stripping in Canada is hugely different than stripping in the USA. Therefore, my answers are going to be very different than someone who works in the US, or even in the UK.

What / who is a sex worker (from) here:

Generally speaking, if you’re getting paid to get someone else hot and bothered, you’re doing some kind of sex work. Sex workers of all kinds, even if they aren’t actually having sex with anyone, have many of the same lifestyle pros and cons, as well as face the same “whore” stigma. More specific job titles can include:

- full service sex workers (full service providers, prostitutes,streetwalkers, rent boys, hookers, escorts, call girls, and courtesans alike - many different labels and none are wrong)
- stripper
- porn performer
- webcam model
- professional dominant (offline and on)
- professional submissive
- phone sex operator
- “happy ending” massage parlour workers
- peep show performers
- sugar baby / sugar daddy
- amateur video and picture sales
- selling panties etc.

This is not meant to be a complete list and obviously there are some practises that fall into a grey area, like sugar baby/daddy(or mommy) relationships. As some commenters have pointed out, a lot of sex work is opportunistic, and thus many more people will trade sex for compensation, in practice, than will ever think of themselves as “sex workers”.


In my replies, I assume that I will often bring up the term "whorephobia". This is a word used to describe the ongoing misogynist attitudes that affect all sex workers. Unfortunately, the sex industry is rampant with providers of all kinds who are also whorephobic. There are many reasons for this, and it is a depressing thing to see. Essentially, people are so engrained with the idea that sex work is wrong that even sex workers, people in a marginalized group, will turn around and say that they "aren't like other sex workers who do _____" in an attempt to make themselves seem better than others. Here is a really great article about whorephobia.

We all know that it is possible that this thread will turn into a poo poo storm and I'm asking that you try to keep that from happening. Please remember that people who work in the sex industry are doing a job. Every job has its lovely parts and if someone is working in the sex industry it means that the positive parts of the job outweigh the negatives. If you don't agree with sex work for moral reasons (or whatever other reasons), that's great. You're not going to convince any of us to quit and we have likely heard you argument / story / rant or whatever before. I am happy to answer questions about the industry, about various jobs within the industry, and about advocacy within the industry. I'm also happy to point you to articles / information if I have or know where to find it.

If you want to know what kind of questions I can answer, what kind of questions I have already answered, or want to read the posts that led to this thread in the first place, you can head over to the stripclub dj thread and check that out first.

This thread is being started with mod approval. It is not a place for politics, debating the industry, or judgement of any kind of those in the industry or what they do or don't do. These posts will be ignored by me (and hopefully others) and reported instead of engaged.

A note on "outting" sex workers: if you know a sex worker, outting them can be extremely dangerous and can put them at direct risk. If you know a sex worker, please respect their privacy and keep any and all information that you have on them on the DL.

luscious fucked around with this message at 02:28 on Aug 27, 2013

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MegaGatts
Dec 12, 2004

The Enteroctopus dofleini, also known as the giant Pacific octopus (GPO) or North Pacific giant octopus, is a large marine cephalopod belonging to the phylum Mollusca and is tripping balls.
How many prostitutes outside of a regulated environment like some counties in Nevada choose the profession as opposed to other jobs? I understand that a large segment of the industry must have very few other choices, but are there any who choose to operate in areas where it's illegal despite having other options? I ask because I can think of few jobs more dangerous than illegal sex work and the benefits, at least to me, are far outweighed by the risk of physical harm or death. Second, why do these people do it? Is it purely the money? It might just be me, but no amount of money could begin to justify the risk unless it was literally a choice between that or starving.

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

MegaGatts posted:

How many prostitutes outside of a regulated environment like some counties in Nevada choose the profession as opposed to other jobs?

All of them? A sex worker is someone who chooses to do the work that they do.

quote:

I understand that a large segment of the industry must have very few other choices, but are there any who choose to operate in areas where it's illegal despite having other options? I ask because I can think of few jobs more dangerous than illegal sex work and the benefits, at least to me, are far outweighed by the risk of physical harm or death.

I think that it's important to really consider that while sex work can be dangerous, there are ways to minimize that. Any work that is illegal can be very dangerous, and even jobs that are legal can be dangerous.

quote:

Second, why do these people do it? Is it purely the money?


Yes. People do jobs that suit their needs.

quote:

It might just be me, but no amount of money could begin to justify the risk unless it was literally a choice between that or starving.

I think that it is incredibly important that people work within their comfort levels and boundaries so I am glad that you are not a sex worker if you feel this way.

I want to make it clear that I cannot answer questions on behalf of all sex workers and since I am not a full service sex worker, answering questions like this is impossible. All that I can give you is answers like I have, which I hope can give you some insight.

luscious fucked around with this message at 04:00 on Aug 27, 2013

Deep Winter
Mar 26, 2010
How does your line of work affect your love life?

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Deep Winter posted:

How does your line of work affect your love life?

It does and it doesn't. It sometimes makes me more reactive to certain kinds of touch, but it's pretty rare that it is a ~problem~. I think that people assume that it will be a problem more than it is. If anything it is a problem that other people have with dating sex workers.

zmcnulty
Jul 26, 2003

Enjoyed your posts in the other thread, most of them anyway. Which of the job titles in your OP have you held? If more than one, can you tell how one compares to another in terms of pros and cons?

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

zmcnulty posted:

Enjoyed your posts in the other thread, most of them anyway. Which of the job titles in your OP have you held? If more than one, can you tell how one compares to another in terms of pros and cons?

Stripper, webcam model, clips, items for sale (panties / other pieces of clothing).

The pros and cons of each job are kind of relative for the person's individual's needs, and I have enjoyed and hated both jobs depending on the time of year, my moods, my living situation, and other things like that. I enjoy camming more in off season since I am not dependent on the club which is dead when there are no tourists. I like stripping more when it is busy because there is way more potential to make money and make it quickly.

Camming requires patience with regards to making money and dealing with things. There's also a whole whack of things that can go wrong like technical difficulties, internet going down, neighbours and roommates or pets. You don't need to deal with people face to face but you do end up having to deal with random and weird stuff and still have to deal with people being abusive. It can be really hard on your body, depending on what you offer and what is being asked of you on any given day. It also turns me into a complete introvert and there are days when I cam that I actually don't leave the house (sometimes many days in a row).

Stripping can be faster, guaranteed money (once the money is in my hands, it stays there) that is made more quickly. One can be busy on a webcam site for an hour straight and make way less than a stripper who is busy for the same amount of time. There is also the potential for it to be hands on as contact levels change place to place. It is generally hard on your body as it is really physically demanding work, and it is hard because of abuse faced from clients.

So depending on the needs and abilities that people have, pros and cons can be different from person to person. Something that I see as being a pro can be a con to someone else and vice versa.

Old Style Pilsner
Feb 14, 2012
Redacted.

Old Style Pilsner fucked around with this message at 11:39 on Aug 27, 2013

Pachinko
Aug 23, 2013
Being a stripper, do you carry any self-defense items in case one of your spectators gets a little fresh, and decides to take a chance?
Would a prostitute carry a knife, or a gun? What measures do you take/are most likely to take in order to stay safe?

Awfully curious.

Very Nice Eraser
May 28, 2011
Interesting thread, hope it doesn't go to hell.

Is prostitution legal where you work? If not, would you consider it if it became legal?

Have you had any interaction with the police re: your job? What's their perception of you?

What are your long term career goals? Do you intend to stay in the sex industry?

Media usually portrays strip clubs as sleazy establishments run by degenerates with gold chains. What is your impression of strip club management and the HR side of things?

Does your family know what you do? What do they think?

What advice would you give to someone considering joining the oldest profession?

Crazyeyes
Nov 5, 2009

If I were human, I believe my response would be: 'go to hell'.
What is the difference between stripper, peep show worker, and cam girls (especially the first two)? Aren't they all "strippers" in a sense?

I always thought strippers and peep show workers were the same thing and cam girls essentially go above and beyond stripping (such as actual sex acts on camera) if they are willing to do so. Is this accurate?

Very Nice Eraser
May 28, 2011

Crazyeyes posted:

What is the difference between stripper, peep show worker, and cam girls (especially the first two)? Aren't they all "strippers" in a sense?

I always thought strippers and peep show workers were the same thing and cam girls essentially go above and beyond stripping (such as actual sex acts on camera) if they are willing to do so. Is this accurate?

A stripper strips. A peep show worker strips in front of a small viewing area through which peepers can peep. A cam girl strips on camera. Any one of them might include various levels of sexual explicitness as allowed by law and as appropriate to the clientele. Since cam girls are unregulated, do not need to operate out of a formal place of business, and typically work one-on-one, they can tailor their show to the predilections of the viewer, which I imagine means they go further into sex acts than a stripper in a nightclub.

There is a strip club here in Tampa whose billboard advertises "changing room cameras" available on their website, so "stripper" vs "cam girl" isn't exactly a formal designation.

Gucci Loafers
May 20, 2006

Ask yourself, do you really want to talk to pair of really nice gaudy shoes?


Are cam-girls still a thing? I thought this was just a fad in the 2000s...

Akratic Method
Mar 9, 2013

It's going to pay off eventually--I'm sure of it.

Any day now.

Tab8715 posted:

Are cam-girls still a thing? I thought this was just a fad in the 2000s...

They're an industry now, more akin to the old 1-900 numbers than the wish-list-posting flirty cam-girls of the early web.

total body workout
Nov 17, 2012
You mention that what defines a "sex worker" is that they do what they do by choice.

-How free is this apparent choice?
-Are many women forced to "choose" to sell their sexual consent because of dire economic straits?
-Do you think that legalization of prostitution will expand the size of the prostitution industry?

Aggressive pricing
Feb 25, 2008

total body workout posted:

You mention that what defines a "sex worker" is that they do what they do by choice.

-How free is this apparent choice?
-Are many women forced to "choose" to sell their sexual consent because of dire economic straits?

One thing that should be made really clear is that there's a huge difference between a sex worker and a sex slave. A sex worker is an ordinary person who has chosen to trade their body/sexuality for profit, a sex slave is a slave who is being exploited sexually. The issue when someone is being forced into prostitution isn't protitution, it's slavery. Slavery is bad, it doesn't matter if the person is being forced to pick cotton or suck a dick.

As far as economic pressures go, same basic idea, the problem isn't prostitution, it's only a symptom of far reaching social problems(education, job opportunities, economic disparity between rich and poor, etc).

DeKalb
May 30, 2007

Hecho en West Germany
Love, GP
How would one get a job as a stripper? I imagine it involves going to a club during the off-hours and speaking to the manager just like any other job, but what exactly is involved and what are they looking for?

Do you have to buy your own outfits/props? They can be expensive...

I've only ever visited a high-end club (and it seemed rather tame, no pole tricks or anything like that) but what are some of the major differences between high-end and low-end clubs?

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Pachinko posted:

Being a stripper, do you carry any self-defense items in case one of your spectators gets a little fresh, and decides to take a chance?
Would a prostitute carry a knife, or a gun? What measures do you take/are most likely to take in order to stay safe?

Awfully curious.

Carrying a weapon is usually not a good idea as they are likely to be used against you. If anything, being alert and aware of what is happening, being able to de-escalate a situation, and knowing how to get your "backup staff" (bouncers) is the best things that you can do for yourself.

I'd assume that some individuals carry weapons on them but it is easy for things to get flipped and the person who is doing "less respectable" work to get charged if there is an altercation and the police get involved.

I went over some of the safety precautions I take in the DJ thread and people went back and forth between saying that I was totally paranoid to saying that it was completely normal, so take a look through my replies in that thread for more on how I specifically stay safe.


Very Nice Eraser posted:

Interesting thread, hope it doesn't go to hell.

Is prostitution legal where you work? If not, would you consider it if it became legal?

Have you had any interaction with the police re: your job? What's their perception of you?

What are your long term career goals? Do you intend to stay in the sex industry?

Media usually portrays strip clubs as sleazy establishments run by degenerates with gold chains. What is your impression of strip club management and the HR side of things?

Does your family know what you do? What do they think?

What advice would you give to someone considering joining the oldest profession?

Prostitution is not legal where I live / work. I go back and forth on it, and would likely consider it much more if I didn't live in this tiny town regardless of the legality of it.

Nothing that I do is illegal so the police can think what they want. I think that the police are well aware of the fact that the problem people at stripclubs aren't the staff but the patrons, so they don't pull our cars over at the end of the night and don't bother giving us poo poo in those ways. It is obviously not a "responsible" job (no matter how responsible you are) and there is generally a paternalistic vibe when police get involved for whatever reason.

My family knows what I do. They are at varying degrees of ok with it.

"Stay safe, know your boundaries, work within them."


Crazyeyes posted:

I always thought strippers and peep show workers were the same thing and cam girls essentially go above and beyond stripping (such as actual sex acts on camera) if they are willing to do so. Is this accurate?


Very Nice Eraser posted:

A stripper strips. A peep show worker strips in front of a small viewing area through which peepers can peep. A cam girl strips on camera. Any one of them might include various levels of sexual explicitness as allowed by law and as appropriate to the clientele. Since cam girls are unregulated, do not need to operate out of a formal place of business, and typically work one-on-one, they can tailor their show to the predilections of the viewer, which I imagine means they go further into sex acts than a stripper in a nightclub.

There is a strip club here in Tampa whose billboard advertises "changing room cameras" available on their website, so "stripper" vs "cam girl" isn't exactly a formal designation.

This is an excellent response so thank you :)

Cam websites are the main way that webcam models are regulated (each website has their own rules that the models must follow). The models can either work independently through skype or yahoo or on a website (there are many) doing whatever they excel at using whatever payment method they are okay with (NEVER PAYPAL). For the sake of clarity, when I talk about camming from now on, it will be either "indy" cam models, or those working on websites like myfreecams or streamate.

Akratic Method posted:

They're an industry now, more akin to the old 1-900 numbers than the wish-list-posting flirty cam-girls of the early web.

Yep. It's a really interesting industry because it's more about entertaining than it is about sex acts. The best customers I had camming were anti-social people who just wanted someone to talk at them while they provided minimal responses. Other good customers are fetish guys who like weird poo poo and would probably never find someone "GGG" enough to indulge whatever fetish / fantasy. Then there's just the ones who are really sad and are deluding themselves into thinking that you're really interested in them. I had this happen once in my most recent camming time and it was some deployed soldier. I had to start refusing him when he would tell me things like he told his friends about me and they laughed at him. Couldn't do it.

DeKalb posted:

How would one get a job as a stripper? I imagine it involves going to a club during the off-hours and speaking to the manager just like any other job, but what exactly is involved and what are they looking for?

Do you have to buy your own outfits/props? They can be expensive...

I've only ever visited a high-end club (and it seemed rather tame, no pole tricks or anything like that) but what are some of the major differences between high-end and low-end clubs?

Call ahead and see if you have to audition or not. Most of the clubs that I have worked at want to see pictures of you but don't necessarily need an audition - a lot in the US need an actual audition but for some reason most Canadian clubs don't care. Generally clubs are looking for pretty, slim, white girls (racism :toot:) though work is still available to you if you don't fit that mold.

Lingerie is pretty popular now for outfits so one could reasonably get hired, have a CUTE bra and panty set and a pair of sex high heels and do ok until they could afford actual stripper shoes / outfits.

Differences between high and low end clubs are club-wide. Everything from "caliber" of girls hired, expectation of "extras", price of drinks, different prices of champagne rooms, expectations of what girls will go home with, amount of effort that the girls put in to appearance, outfits, stage sets, entertaining customers in general.... It's pretty much night and day. Some people like the lower-end because they find the girls nicer, others not so much. It kind of depends on what you're looking for and what you want to see.

luscious fucked around with this message at 19:45 on Aug 27, 2013

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

total body workout posted:

You mention that what defines a "sex worker" is that they do what they do by choice.

-How free is this apparent choice?
-Are many women forced to "choose" to sell their sexual consent because of dire economic straits?
-Do you think that legalization of prostitution will expand the size of the prostitution industry?

Look, unless you have a trust fund, you’ve got to have a job, more or less. EVERYONE chooses their job out of financial necessity. Does that make everyone’s labor forced, or coerced, or trafficked?

How did you choose your job? Probably you thought about your skills, the way you work best, the kind of place you’d like to work for (or if you’d like to be your own boss), and then, having thought about all that, what kinds of jobs are actually available for a person like you.

So, this is where a sex worker by choice comes in. They look at their skillset, think about what they enjoy, think about how well they do (or don’t) play with others, and think, “You know? Sex work sounds like the job for me.”

You might choose it because the hours with sex work are very very flexible. This is great if you have serious passions and interests you want to be able to pursue on the side, maybe even one day, with nurturing, turn into a business of its own. This is great if you have mental health issues that make it hard for you to keep normal hours or work regularly. It’s great if you’re a single parent and need to balance work and childcare.

You might choose it because sexuality fascinates you, and you want to learn more about it. You might choose it because in this job, we really DO help people and offer a needed service. You might choose it because hey, looking at your skillset, you ARE good at sex. You might choose it because you like the way it makes you feel, strong and sexy and in charge of your own life.

You might choose it because frankly, it’s lucrative. When was the last time you were paid $300/hour? I know right? And money is as good a reason as any.

All of us are more or less equally coerced by the need to work, by the economics of society at large. Sex workers by choice aren’t exempt from that, but within that larger social coercion, choose sex work, for whatever reasons they have.

Human trafficking victims do NOT have that choice. Their will is subject to that of their captors and enslavers, and not all human trafficking is sex trafficking. ALL slavery is violating and awful. There is a massive difference between being kidnapped and forced to work against your will by other people, no matter what the job, and having a job—like we ALL do—that just happens to be in the sex industry, because that’s what you decided to do.


from here

Aggressive pricing posted:

One thing that should be made really clear is that there's a huge difference between a sex worker and a sex slave. A sex worker is an ordinary person who has chosen to trade their body/sexuality for profit, a sex slave is a slave who is being exploited sexually. The issue when someone is being forced into prostitution isn't protitution, it's slavery. Slavery is bad, it doesn't matter if the person is being forced to pick cotton or suck a dick.

As far as economic pressures go, same basic idea, the problem isn't prostitution, it's only a symptom of far reaching social problems(education, job opportunities, economic disparity between rich and poor, etc).

Thank you for this reply as well, it is great :)

Sexgun Rasputin
May 5, 2013

by Ralp

(and can't post for 716 days!)

luscious posted:

(NEVER PAYPAL).

I'm assuming no Paypal because of spurious disputes/claims allowing people to get service for free right?

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Not My Goodies posted:

I'm assuming no Paypal because of spurious disputes/claims allowing people to get service for free right?

Paypal actually has rules about being used in adult transactions... namely that Paypal cannot be used for adult transactions. It is possible to do so by declaring it a "donation" or whatever other bullshit one might try to pull, but at the end of the day, Paypal is a nasty beast and it is well known that they will gently caress with you and not give any shits about what that does to you / your business / your finances.

There are many other ways to get paid online including Payoneer, Amazon giftcards (Amazon wishlist is ok but there are ways that people can mess with you with it), or through payment processing websites.

Unfortunately, many camsite customers know that if they use Paypal to pay for an adult transaction that they can dispute it and get their money back but not all cammodels know this is the case. Often times sleazy customers will try to manipulate new models into doing things ("do this and THEN I will pay you") and the Paypal scam is a big one. Amazon wishlist scams can be just as bad (you can go to someone's wishlist and click "report item as bought" or "undo a purchase" later) and it is possible to find someone's address through third party sellers on Amazon.

The safest way to go about being paid on the internet is either with giftcards (redeem immediately) or through a payment processing website that will cover chargebacks if they are made. There is honestly nothing worst than doing a cam show with someone, making $$, and then having that show up as negative in your bank account if they decide to do a chargeback.

Very Nice Eraser
May 28, 2011
What do you do when you get your period? I assume some kinds of performances are not practical?

Gucci Loafers
May 20, 2006

Ask yourself, do you really want to talk to pair of really nice gaudy shoes?


John McCain: $1 Coin Could Mean 'Larger Denominations' For Strippers

Any comment? Don't they use coin in Canadian strip-clubs? Not sure how if this is correct or not...

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Very Nice Eraser posted:

What do you do when you get your period? I assume some kinds of performances are not practical?

I have no problem with working on my period but some do - it kind of depends on the individual and how their period affects them. I have always been a fan on menstrual cups and sea sponges, but tampons are totally fine too as long as you tuck the string in (I just insert them upside down so there is no way that the string can come out).

With camming, tampons or menstrual cups don't really work, so the choices are sea sponges, Instead cups, or scheduling the time to do "blood play" with customers (on websites that allow this).

My period is always light and I don't get horrible cramps so it affects me less than it would affect someone who has a super heavy flow and cramps up badly. I know girls who have gotten their period on people, or while they were on stage or whatever. I don't think it's a huge deal... like it obviously sucks but you deal and move on. It's kinda like pubic hair: men know that it's there but part of the fantasy is that they don't have to deal with it.

Aggressive pricing
Feb 25, 2008

luscious posted:

Thank you for this reply as well, it is great :)

No problem, a few friends of mine have dabbled in the sex trade and I'm always happy to go on a little rant about it.

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.
I know that this thread seems kinda serious and I'd like to offer some stories and topics to lighten it up.

- The feral state of the camgirl
- "It's like Survivor but we can't vote the ones we don't like out"
- Baby name or stage name?
- You do what for HOW MUCH?
- Online dating mishaps

Crazyeyes
Nov 5, 2009

If I were human, I believe my response would be: 'go to hell'.

luscious posted:

- The feral state of the camgirl

This one, please.

Also (if you don't mind): what is the weirdest thing someone ever requested of you in one of these cam sessions/times? What is the weirdest you have ever actually accommodated?

Edit: I ask not to be creepy but rather because my only real point of reference is the stereotypical cam "rooms" with a bunch of people shouting through their keyboards for the girl to do weird stuff. I don't know how much of that stereotype is accurate.

Crazyeyes fucked around with this message at 14:20 on Aug 28, 2013

Vulvarine
Mar 23, 2008
There are lots of sex worker jobs that don't necessitate penetrative sex, but it's obvious that many will provide it and in fact, that's the whole point and it's why someone would engage their services. For example, I was just looking at a website for a professional submissive and her list of approved activities was non-penetrative (flogging, bondage, so on), but then there was a disclaimer at the bottom saying that if sex did happen it was a consensual activity and was not a paid service etc etc. Obviously this was to get around the fact that straight-up prostitution is illegal in her jurisdiction, but her services definitely involve penetrative sex like 99% of the time, right?

How does this work? People who engage her services are expecting sex even though the transaction cannot be explicit. Does this create a problem for sex workers who do NOT want to engage in penetrative sex, but work in a field where the majority of their "coworkers" do provide that? How and when do you clear this up for a potential client, and is there specific language involved to shield yourself from legal prosecution?

I recently read "Paying For It" by Chester Brown. Have you read it, and if so, do you think it is an accurate portrayal?

(Edited because I veered into politics a bit... sorry!)

Vulvarine fucked around with this message at 14:37 on Aug 28, 2013

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.
Feral state of the camgirl:

I'm pretty introverted and have an anxiety problem. If I don't check myself, I will happily sit in my apartment (probably happily alone) for days at a time. Leaving the house becomes hard, and the longer that this goes on, the harder the cycle becomes to break. Add onto this that I live in a city that pretty much requires a car and has really lovely public transit. I essentially have to cab all over town, which can get expensive. Basically, I have the "anxiety problem" cards stacked against me. And when you add in a job where you don't have to leave the home... well... it creates a recipe for disaster.

In order to cam successfully, you have to create a personality that is accessible to the customer. This means that you have to be available around the same times every day. Like, every day. So, when you know that you gotta be online around this time every day, and the stuff that you want to do where you have to leave the house (when you already kinda don't WANT to leave the house) is stuff that you can get around and put off. Like grocery shopping, going to the gym, and going to appointments.

When I cam, my day ultimately becomes:
- Wake up
- coffee, breakfast
- do stuff that I have to do during the day (usually watching TV, reading, chit chatting with friends)
- "I need to go grocery shopping but I'm not gunna do that today..."
- get ready for work
- get on cam
- take a break and watch some shows
- eat dinner
- get on cam
- finish camming, get off cam, get ready to go to sleep
= sleeeeeeeeeep

See, the problem is that once I'm on cam, I don't want to take a long break to cook and eat, and ordering food isn't that big a deal. So ordering food is totally great until restaurants close and I haven't ordered yet. That's when it becomes an "oh poo poo now I can only order from Pizza Pizza" moment. But the extreme-ist is when I don't even want to get off cam and start ordering food online, only going offline to take my break when the food ARRIVES.

I have a few other friends who are camgirls, and while this is kind of extreme it is semi-normal. Groceries get delivered (I like to choose my own produce so instead of delivery groceries I will just order poo poo all week), food gets delivered, booze gets delivered, personal trainers come to your house.... things just happen at home.

Usually at the end of the week I will survey the damage. The worst week that I had trash wise I realized that I had ordered almost every meal as delivery (most of my night time meals online delivery), had received most of my shopping in the mail, and had hardly spoken to an actual, real, person. All in a line, or online.

So now when I cam I'm more careful. I try to leave the house at least ONCE a day to do an actual thing whether it's buying cigarettes, grocery shopping, gym, whatever. I also cook before I go on cam so I don't have much reason to order food. I also try to talk on the phone with a friend if I don't see one in real time.

No more feral camgirl syndrome.

Crazyeyes posted:

This one, please.

Also (if you don't mind): what is the weirdest thing someone ever requested of you in one of these cam sessions/times? What is the weirdest you have ever actually accommodated?

Edit: I ask not to be creepy but rather because my only real point of reference is the stereotypical cam "rooms" with a bunch of people shouting through their keyboards for the girl to do weird stuff. I don't know how much of that stereotype is accurate.

I'm kind of at a loss for what the strangest thing is because right now I don't really have a good measure for "strange". Like, to me, strange is more "let's do something normal let me watch you make the bed" or I guess I can say things like "cover yourself in cheese slices, masturbate and eat them" or maybe "put on five sweaters, legwarmers, socks, hats, basically everything wool that you have and then roll around on the ground telling me how soft and fluffy it is".
I'm not really into doing roleplays so the most that I'm into is really specific requests that I can and will accomodate. But the weirdest thing to me is when people just want to talk or just want me to do a domestic thing like make dinner or do a bedtime ritual and pretend to sleep until their money runs out.

Vulvarine posted:

There are lots of sex worker jobs that don't necessitate penetrative sex, but it's obvious that many will provide it and in fact, that's the whole point and it's why someone would engage their services. For example, I was just looking at a website for a professional submissive and her list of approved activities was non-penetrative (flogging, bondage, so on), but then there was a disclaimer at the bottom saying that if sex did happen it was a consensual activity and was not a paid service etc etc. Obviously this was to get around the fact that straight-up prostitution is illegal in her jurisdiction, but her services definitely involve penetrative sex like 99% of the time, right?

I have no idea. In fact, no one knows but this woman and the clients that she either does, or does not have penetrative sex with.

quote:

How does this work? People who engage her services are expecting sex even though the transaction cannot be explicit. Does this create a problem for sex workers who do NOT want to engage in penetrative sex, but work in a field where the majority of their "coworkers" do provide that? How and when do you clear this up for a potential client, and is there specific language involved to shield yourself from legal prosecution?

I recently read "Paying For It" by Chester Brown. Have you read it, and if so, do you think it is an accurate portrayal?

(Edited because I veered into politics a bit... sorry!)

I hope that you understand why I can't answer with regards to that particular provider. It is possible that she is just trying to cover her rear end and that no one is actually engaging in penetrative sex - but that she wants to make it clear to potential clients that consent is always explicit. It also might just be a tease... I have no idea.

What I can say is that a provider is usually clear with their clients about what they will and won't do - including full service - and reviews of providers on websites / within the community should at least help customers find what they are looking for. It CAN create a problem for other providers because the industry is pretty saturated and once full service starts becoming a ~thing~ it's hard to get rid of. Customers start expecting it and then providers end up feeling that they have to start offering full service in order to stay competitive.

I haven't read Paying For It but I'm certainly interested. As I am not a full service sex worker I really can't say whether or not it is accurate. I will say that in general I only trust the stories that sex workers tell me and having never been a john, I can't speak for that side of it either.

Aggressive pricing
Feb 25, 2008

luscious posted:

I guess I can say things like "cover yourself in cheese slices, masturbate and eat them"

Yeah, I'd say that counts as strange.

How about Online dating mishaps? Those threads are always amazing and I can only imagine you've hit entirely new levels of awkward.

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Aggressive pricing posted:

Yeah, I'd say that counts as strange.

My camgirl friend also wanted me to share the time that she did a roleplay with a guy who wanted her to pretend to be chloroformed. He basically wanted her to struggle as if someone had come up behind her, "try to fight him off" and then act like she was knocked out cold. She spent the entire session on her back with only her leg on screen o.O

quote:

How about Online dating mishaps? Those threads are always amazing and I can only imagine you've hit entirely new levels of awkward.

I had a weird night so I'm going to have to get back to this tomorrow. I will say that I have this ongoing military drama that takes place on plenty of fish and at the club.

Very Nice Eraser
May 28, 2011

luscious posted:

Feral state of the camgirl

If you were buying sex and not selling it, this would be the saddest story ever :(

Have you ever considered getting into porn? Do you cross paths with the porn industry, or is that an entirely different animal?

Marmaduke!
May 19, 2009

Why would it do that!?
I see no mention of showering or otherwise during the feral state, is that intentional? I've known other people in an anxious or agoraphobiac state that have gotten a bit lax with their hygiene...

Crazyeyes
Nov 5, 2009

If I were human, I believe my response would be: 'go to hell'.

luscious posted:

I guess I can say things like "cover yourself in cheese slices, masturbate and eat them" or maybe "put on five sweaters, legwarmers, socks, hats, basically everything wool that you have and then roll around on the ground telling me how soft and fluffy it is".

Are these actual examples of things you have heard of/done?

Also judging by your responses these cam sessions (whatever they are called? ) are a 1-on-1 thing? I always assumed they were group/"chatroom" style setups to maximize income and all that.

ExecuDork
Feb 25, 2007

We might be fucked, sir.
Fallen Rib
I'm also in Canada, and while I am certainly not a lawyer, I looked into the relevant laws a bit a year or two ago. What I got was that in Canada, a transaction of money (or other valuables) from one person for sex from the other was entirely legal - it's paying for a service, legally equivalent to paying someone to wash your car or file your taxes. But pretty much all of the other acts that happen before or immediately after that legal transaction are outlawed - the laws were apparently intended to prevent pimping, or another person taking advantage of a prostitute. So things like renting a hotel room specifically for sex work to happen in is illegal, as is pretty much any kind of advertising (this means writing the name and phone number of a sex worker on the bathroom wall in the bar is technically a crime). Some of the laws are aimed at johns, so if a person parks next to another person on a public street, rolls down the window, and asks "How much for a blowjob?", the police could arrest and charge that driver, and seize the car - and good luck getting your car back!
It didn't occur to me to look into it, so I don't know what is and is not prohibited regarding camgirls.

I live in Saskatchewan, which (apparently, I haven't really checked thoroughly) has a law that prohibits alcohol being served where there are strippers - I refer to it as the "no booze around naked people" rule. Since strip clubs make most of their money from selling overpriced drinks, there are no strip clubs in Saskatchewan.

I could be quite wrong about both points. I'm curious if the OP or anyone else could confirm or contradict.

You mentioned your bouncers. How often do you have to call Bruno over? (I'll call him Bruno because I was once in a strip club and when I didn't order a drink, and neither did my friends - we were cheap-rear end students - I heard the waitress mutter "Where's Bruno?" as she walked by. A very large man appeared soon after and I purchased an expensive bottle of cheap beer.)

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Very Nice Eraser posted:

If you were buying sex and not selling it, this would be the saddest story ever :(

Have you ever considered getting into porn? Do you cross paths with the porn industry, or is that an entirely different animal?

Hah.

A lot of people consider camming to be porn. I go back and forth on this. I know that I have been recorded and I know that people use videos of me later to get off. I have consented to actual TV broadcast of camshows as well. Ultimately, camming is custom porn so I guess that I'm an amateur porn star :haw:

Squalitude posted:

I see no mention of showering or otherwise during the feral state, is that intentional? I've known other people in an anxious or agoraphobiac state that have gotten a bit lax with their hygiene...

Oh, showering is just a part of getting ready for work. I would sometimes shower on shift too... I had customers who liked "wet t-shirt" stuff and sometimes guys like seeing shower shows and stuff. I often wash up at the end of the shift too because I would be covered in coconut oil (what I use for lube).


Crazyeyes posted:

Are these actual examples of things you have heard of/done?

Also judging by your responses these cam sessions (whatever they are called? ) are a 1-on-1 thing? I always assumed they were group/"chatroom" style setups to maximize income and all that.

Direct examples, yeah. I don't eat cheese so I couldn't indulge that one guy.

There are different websites that have different set ups. Some of them are group style, and some of them are one on one. With regards to maximizing income: it really depends on one's specific needs and ways that one wants to work. It's a different experience with different challenges and techniques. Rememeber: not everyone is paying on the big group websites but everyone wants you to do stuff. One on one everyone is paying so it's less insulting when they're barking orders (I don't like putting up with barking orders but at least pay me if you're going to try).


Aggressive pricing posted:

How about Online dating mishaps? Those threads are always amazing and I can only imagine you've hit entirely new levels of awkward.


Instead I stumbled upon the biggest drama bomb that I have ever encountered and considering my job, that's pretty impressive.

Military Boy 1 (MB1) was sweet. From Toronto, really good in bed, but also super damaged by his ex. But whatever... I wasn't necessarily looking for someone to be in a relationship with - I more just wanted to have company and get laid. Aside from being really good in bed, MB1 really didn't bring that much to my life and I eventually ditched him after a whole lot of online drama involving harsh words and apparently ~blackout drinking~. The final straw was actually when I invited MB1 over and he told me that the only way that he would was if I lured his friend over for a threesome because he was drunk and refused to let me pay for a cab and his friend was the DD. So like. Instead of letting me pay for a taxi, he was trying to set up some threesome where my pussy paid his debt to a friend.

So back to pof and onto MB2. As soon as MB2 told me that he was in the military I was on guard. Like I said before, everyone knows everyone up here, right? After texting for a while I decided to creep his Facebook to see if he knew MB1. Well. As it turns out, MB2 was the DD to MB1 that night :aaa: However, MB2 told me that he had no part of that whole situation. MB2 eventually did some weird bullshit that made me stop talking to him until I was drunk a week later when I was drunk. He came over, we had a brief encounter and then he vanished never to be seen again. I learned last night that he is in a serious relationship and is planning on asking her to marry him.

There were eventually several more military men... I think that I'm on MB6 or 7 though I only ever hooked up with the two of them. MB1 actually hung out with me last night. He still calls women "females" and has issues but whatever... I don't really care about his personality.

After going back to work after the surgery and camming, I ended up having to take my profile down because I had a bunch of customers either message me saying that they had seen me that night at work or have guys at work say that they had seen me on pof. It got kinda weird. So profile removed.

In that whole mix, I entered into a somewhat inappropriate relationship with the son of a person that I have a professional relationship with. It was mostly just flirting over text and chat but one day I got a text from him asking me to meet him at a bar downtown wanting to hang out and go on a date. It was pretty exciting because he was really one of the only people in this city that I felt like I could have any kind of things in common with. I showed up on the date and it was. It was. The wrong person. I actually had to think about where I could have known that person from. I honestly had no idea. I eventually realized that it was a dude that I had met on pof and texted with over a month ago for ONE NIGHT. As soon as I realized that I was with the wrong person it was like. gently caress. It kind of reminded me of the scene from Mad Men where they have to deliver the presentation to the airline that they know isn't going to even consider them. Y' know?

There's other things too... I just broke a really long dry spell after having a bunch of really weird experiences with men in this city. I am pretty much aware of the fact that I'm probably not going to find a partner while I'm up here and am ok with that. I hope to not go through more long dry spells but whatever, I'm down with that too.

I mean, I guess those aren't too weird. The whole military thing became kinda all consuming at one point. Drama is fun until it's out of control, right?

luscious fucked around with this message at 04:25 on Sep 10, 2013

epsilon-6
Dec 25, 2002
What surgery are you referring to?

luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

epsilon-6 posted:

What surgery are you referring to?

I got breast implants in October of 2012.

Very Nice Eraser
May 28, 2011

luscious posted:

I got breast implants in October of 2012.

Was that a career decision? Like a baseball player buying a new pair of cleats? Or something you wanted in your private life?

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luscious
Mar 8, 2005

Who can find a virtuous woman,
For her price is far above rubies.

Very Nice Eraser posted:

Was that a career decision? Like a baseball player buying a new pair of cleats? Or something you wanted in your private life?

A little bit of both. A lot of girls say that it is a decision that they made solely for themselves which is something that I didn't really think was possible until I had mine done. I lost a lot of weight and my breasts ended up looking rather deflated. If I could have worn a push-up bra all the time I probably would have been okay with them but I didn't like how they looked ever so I made the decision to get implants. While it was something that I wanted to do for my personal life (to increase my self-confidence in how I looked day to day after the weightloss) I cannot deny that the two are tied really closely together. They are really well done and people, even boob guys, have a hard time figuring out whether or not they are natural.

It's not really comparable to getting a new pair of cleats as they are a permanent adjustment to my body and considering the fact that I have many job related expenses that are like. getting new stripper heels.

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