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Gio posted:If Pavel Datsyuk doesn't score 50 goals and 120 pts. I will donate $20 to a local LGBT charity. Hopefully this will be his motivation this year.
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Sep 1, 2013 04:43
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During the STL @ DET game on Monday, January 20th, if the entire GDT goes from open to close without a single post regarding "Joe Louis Arena advantage", penalties in the third period, or penalties in general going against the Blues in favor of the Red Wings in a manner that is unfair or in following with some longstanding tradition, I will buy this handsome T.J. Oshie doll and shower it with love and affection and definitely not destroy it the second it arrives. Or if anybody else wants it, I'll just have it sent to them instead. Also, I will write a short essay (250 words each) celebrating the skills and accomplishments of every goaltender who finishes ahead of Jimmy Howard in SV% this year titled "Goalies More Elite Than James Russell Howard III". MJeff fucked around with this message at 11:25 on Sep 4, 2013 |
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Sep 4, 2013 11:11
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flakeloaf posted:If the Wings make it farther than the Sens do in the postseason, I'll buy a Garrioch avatar, not replace it until the end of the 14-15 season, and refrain from speaking a word against Sun Media's contribution to journalism while I have it. This is my favorite toxx. I'll do something similar. If the Sens make it farther than the Wings do in the postseason, I'll buy the fattest, ugliest avatar of Garrioch that I can find and not replace it until the end of the 14-15 season. I still won't refrain from speaking against their horrible journalistic standards though. I have some other ones as well: 1) Philly will make the playoffs. 2) New York Islanders will not. 3) Alfredsson + Silfverberg will combine to outscore MacArthur + Ryan 4) Silfverberg individually will have more points than Bobby Ryan 5) Kyle Palmieri will score more than 25 goals. 6) Grabovski will spend the bulk of the year, including playoffs, as the third line center in Washington (based on usage / ice time / points) behind Brooks Laich, Nic Backstrom, or someone else. I'll leave it to Washington fans to determine whether or not this is accurate. Nulled in the case of injuries to Grabovski. 7) Schneider will post a .925 or better save % and start more than 50 games for Jersey. 8) They still won't make the playoffs. 9) Tuuka Rask will win the Vezina. 10) Phil the Thrill will leave Toronto either at or before the trade deadline, or during free agency next summer. 11) Dubnyk will post a .920 or better save % for Edmonton. 12) They still won't make the playoffs. 13) Sami Vatanen will finish top 3 in Calder voting. 14) Milan Michalek and Jason Spezza will combine to play less than 130 games (I know, this one is a real stretch). 15) Drew Doughty will score 20 or more goals. If 5 or more of these do not come to pass, I'll donate 50$ to St Mary's, a local charity for pregnant teens.
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Sep 4, 2013 15:52
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Two toxxes: -If the Ducks finish higher than the Senators in the regular season standings, I will buy a Ducks Silfverberg shirsey and make a video of me crying like a little girl into it. -If the Wings eliminate the Senators in the Stanley Cup playoffs (a likely matchup considering the divisional playoff scheme), I will make a video of myself burning my prized knockoff Alfredsson jersey and also probably cry like a little girl again
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Sep 5, 2013 01:51
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Great toxxes, I love tears
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Sep 5, 2013 03:00
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I'll pitch in $2 to the Habs Children's Foundation for every time PK Subban disrespects the back of the net. $3 if <15.
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Sep 5, 2013 03:05
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If the Capitals do not make it to the second round of the playoffs, I will eat one tater-tot for each ) and five for each use of the word "sick" that Ovechkin tweets between the start of the season and the day the Capitals are eliminated.
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Sep 5, 2013 15:36
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Since fishsticks seem to be "in"... If Tampa finishes in the bottom 3 in the
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Sep 6, 2013 07:50
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Parachute Underwear posted:I'll pitch in $2 to the Habs Children's Foundation for every time PK Subban disrespects the back of the net. $3 if <15. Ooh, I like this one. I'll pitch in $1 for every goal scored by Brendan Gallagher and $0.50 for every assist.
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Sep 6, 2013 13:00
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If Kari Lehtonen starts less than half of this season's games, I will let Austrian mook pick my offseason avatar. This is dangerous.
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Sep 6, 2013 13:56
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You fool. You brave, mad, fool.
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Sep 6, 2013 14:28
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LumpyGumby posted:You fool. My faith in Andy Moog is strong as Damascus steel.
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Sep 6, 2013 14:54
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DOOMocrat posted:My faith in Andy Moog is strong as Damascus steel. Hopefully it's stronger than Lehtonen's groin.
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Sep 6, 2013 16:38
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]1) If Bernier's save percentage is better than Reimer's was last year (.924) I will buy six sandwiches at Metro and hand them out to the homeless in downtown Ottawa (maybe video and upload, if I can find a way to do it without offending or identifying anyone). If he does surpass Reimer's save percentage I will simply donate $20 to a charity of PK loving SUBBAN or flakeloaf's choosing. 2) If John Tortorella has a job in Van-city come playoff time, I will snail mail a letter to the Canucks organization written in magic marker with my non-dominant hand telling them why they are the best hockey club in Canada (~250 words). 3) If (when) the Leafs miss the playoffs, I will eat one McDonals bacon cheeseburgers (with nothing but three toppings put forward by the next goon to toxx for anything leafs related [sub]any topping or sauce but relish[/sub]) per point they are out of the playoffs (max 9) in one sitting, then likely proceed to projectile vomit through my nose and feel like poo poo for two days. YouTube vid (including puking if the three toppings are bad enough). 4) If any Leafs wins a major award I will buy a very tight fitting Ottawa shirsey and wear it for a whole weekend in the summer. Bonus - If three of the four happen (Bernier save%, Torts still in Van, no leafs post season, a major leaf player award) I will pay for Kafka Esq. to assign me whatever awful avatar he should choose and buy him a decent one not praising a bigot. e: woops, hit edit instead of quote. Cocaine Bear fucked around with this message at 20:23 on Nov 10, 2013 |
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Sep 20, 2013 01:57
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JoelJoel you are amazing.
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Sep 20, 2013 17:23
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Shoeonhead22 and I have a $20 charity bet for where the Jackets place in the league at the end of the season. Bottom 3rd (21-30) then Shoeonhead22 wins and I give $20 to whatever charity he wants. 1-20 and I pick a charity for him. I'd also be up with doing some kind of charity Toxx bet with a Penguin fan. I think something about Fleruy vs Mason or Emery save % would be fun even though I know I'll probably lose simply because your D is better and ours is old and will die within 20 games. Would rather do charity bet than avatar since I'd probably kill myself if I had to keep a Penguin avatar for the whole offseason or whatever time frame. Also up for an intra-FAS bet since I'm wearing my Wayne Train shirt today. No idea what that'd be, but could be fun. Shyfted One fucked around with this message at 22:55 on Sep 23, 2013 |
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Sep 23, 2013 22:41
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Reposting from n/v:Zodijackylite posted:
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Sep 28, 2013 20:02
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If Brandon Dubinsky finishes the season with more points than Rick Nash I will get a Brandon Dubinsky avatar. I suppose it should probably be a new one since I'm over a year late on replacing the Rangers Dubitar.
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Twin Cinema posted:I am going to make ten predictions, and the toxx clause will come into effect if less than half of these do not happen. For every one of these that doesn't happen, I'll donate $5 to a charity of my choosing. So, it's possible that I donate $50.
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Oct 2, 2013 04:50
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Twin Cinema posted:For every one of these that doesn't happen, I'll donate $5 to a charity of my choosing. So, it's possible that I donate $50. You just did this so you can decide what toppings JoelJoel eats.
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Oct 21, 2013 20:36
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 If Matt Moulson scores more goals as a Sabre this season than Thomas Vanek does as an Islander this season, I will buy an avatar bemoaning the loss of ELITE HOCKEY MANS MATT MOULSON and denouncing the Islanders rebuild for such a time as it takes John Tavares to score more goals than they both did in that period of time, starting in the 2014-15 season. If Vanek scores more than Moulson I will simply be happy in the knowledge that a loving backup goalie can run a team better than Paul Holmgren. Current score is Matty Mo: 2, NYI Austrian player #2: 0, but Vanek has yet to play as an Islander so I think this is timely. What I mean by the last part is that I will change my avatar whenever I feel like it at some point after JT gets one more goal than the both of them combined, not necessarily in one season's time.
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Oct 29, 2013 18:17
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Twin Cinema posted:I am going to make ten predictions, and the toxx clause will come into effect if less than half of these do not happen. Let's see how this is going. 1. Hall's 8 points in 9 games was a pretty good pace, and then he got injured. He should be back tomorrow, but missing those 6 games may be too much. 2. 0 goals in 5 games. Only 67 games left to go. 3. Too early to tell. 4. Too early to tell. 5. 6 goals in 14 games. Needs to score at a 0.65 GPG pace for the rest of the season now. Not so confident in this. 6. So far, so good. 7. At his current pace, will score 27 points (all assists). 8. At his current pace, will score 49 points (all assists). 9. Haha, gently caress. 10. At his current pace, will score 125 points.
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Nov 4, 2013 16:55
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Jordan7hm posted:1) Philly will make the playoffs. 1) Yikes. That said, they're only 6 points out of a playoff spot (assuming 3 teams from the Glen division). 2) Still very much up in the air. This division is awful, but so is their goalie. 3) 13 + 7 (20) vs 8 + 14 (22). The injury to Silf hurts, but this one should be pretty close. 4) Not gonna happen 5) On pace for 18.9. I think this is still doable, but he needs more ice time for it to happen. 6) Center ice time: Backstrom, Laich, Johansson, Grabbo. I think this one will likely end up being the case. 7) Looks like he'll get the 50 games, but not sure he'll get the .925. 8) Probably going to miss. Though, same qualification as for Philly. This is a maybe. 9) Certainly the front runner. 10) Nope. 11) His rough start still has him at .911. This one is doable. 12) Haha yep. 13) Doubt it. He'd need to majorly turn it on. 14) They're on pace to play more, but I think this one still happens. 15) On pace for 21 goals. 2 for sure nos (Phil, Silf v BRyan). 13 maybes. 1 yes (Edmonton is missing).
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Nov 4, 2013 17:41
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flakeloaf posted:If the Wings make it farther than the Sens do in the postseason, I'll buy a Garrioch avatar, not replace it until the end of the 14-15 season, and refrain from speaking a word against Sun Media's contribution to journalism while I have it.  I'd like for this to take longer than the opening faceoff of game one in the Wings-Bruins series.
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Nov 4, 2013 18:06
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Update:UZworm posted:If neither the Avalanche nor the Sabres make the playoffs, I will buy an avatar showcasing all of my least favorite hockey teams (with accompanying red text) and will keep it on until the start of the 2014/2015 season, perhaps longer. Thankfully I only needed one of them to be good 
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Nov 4, 2013 18:10
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Drunk Canuck posted:If the Leafs fail to be a 9th or lower seed at the end of the 2013-2014 National Hockey League season, I will purchase one (1) pro-Randy Carlyle avatar on his excellence as a professional hockey coach. Leafs sitting in 3rd place, gently caress. David Clarkson has only tallied an assist in 5 games played, nice. Currently Grabovski has 13 points in 14 games and Bozak has 6 in 11GP while also injured and out for at least 3 weeks. Cautiously optimistic.
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Nov 4, 2013 21:54
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Man, the habs sure are looking shaky. That reminds me, I think there was something I was supposed to do about that...Rene Bork posted:Should the Montreal Canadiens fail to make the playoffs this year, I will pen a letter to Marc Bergevin begging him to get Scott Gomez back, as he was the lynchpin that kept the team together. Riiiiiight. I'm gonna write a draft just in case.
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Nov 5, 2013 00:20
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burf posted:Since I like the idea of multiple predictions, so I'm doing it too. If 6 or more of the following predictions are incorrect, I will get an avatar of SAS' choosing. 1. Seems likely 2. Seems likely 3. Seems likely 4. Ehhh maybe, but he really needs to pick up the other parts of his game. 5. Haha 6. Ahahahahaha 7. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 8. No clue yet! 9.  10. - On the other hand, at least Anaheim has the underlying stats to back up their position. Toronto is still a befuddling mess of winning hockey games.11. There's no way this doesn't happen.
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Nov 5, 2013 00:24
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Jordan7hm posted:6) Center ice time: Backstrom, Laich, Johansson, Grabbo. I think this one will likely end up being the case. Johansson has played all but one game at left wing. Usage wise Grabovski is about 50% second line and 50% third line this year to date.
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Nov 5, 2013 01:15
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VJeff posted:Also, I will write a short essay (250 words each) celebrating the skills and accomplishments of every goaltender who finishes ahead of Jimmy Howard in SV% this year titled "Goalies More Elite Than James Russell Howard III".  Hahahahahahahahahahahah 
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Nov 5, 2013 01:18
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Reverend Sub-Zero posted:The Philadelphia Flyers will be in the playoffs. If they are not I will cheer for the Penguins or the Rangers until they are eliminated from playoff contention. An avatar will be purchased as well as a Jersey t-shirt. I am so so so so hosed. 
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Nov 5, 2013 01:57
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MassaShowtime posted:This toxx is in honour of Ladislav Smid's one year wedding anniversary and the fact that he hopefully will no longer steal cheerios from the unsuspecting roomates of the women of Edmonton that Ladi once made love to. Smid currently sits at 2 points and is on pace for all of 11. He had an assist against Vancouver and a goal (lol) against Montreal.
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Nov 5, 2013 02:07
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Guignol posted:Two toxxes: they don't even make these yet fuuuuuck
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Nov 5, 2013 05:09
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Reverend Sub-Zero posted:I am so so so so hosed. the good news is that neither the rangers or penguins will make it out of the first round so that part of the toxx will be shortlived!
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Nov 5, 2013 05:24
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PK loving SUBBAN posted:David Desharnais will be playing for another team before the playoffs start. I've got to say mine's looking pretty good.
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Nov 5, 2013 05:49
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Reverend Sub-Zero posted:I am so so so so hosed. oh man this is awesome
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Nov 5, 2013 07:14
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VJeff posted:
I'm really looking forward to you celebrating the skills of Harding, Price, MAF and Varly
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Nov 5, 2013 09:07
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Shoeonhead22 posted:I'm really looking forward to you celebrating the skills of Harding, Price, MAF and Varly If I get to extoll the virtues of Steve Mason, it'll all be worth it.
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Nov 5, 2013 10:35
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Shoeonhead22 posted:I'm really looking forward to you celebrating the skills of Harding, Price, MAF and Varly Yeah maybe you should start brainstorming now, just in case. For MAF and Varly alone it's probably gonna be pretty tough!
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Nov 5, 2013 10:44
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Zodijackylite posted:Reposting from n/v: Whoa...if Nash is out for a significant portion of time and Dubi can keep up his current pace (8 points in 13 games), this might happen as improbable as it might have seemed.
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Nov 5, 2013 16:28
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CBJSprague24 posted:Whoa...if Nash is out for a significant portion of time and Dubi can keep up his current pace (8 points in 13 games), this might happen as improbable as it might have seemed. RIP Rick Nash. Good thing I really like Brandon Dubinsky.
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Nov 6, 2013 08:16
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