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The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > hey, it's bob
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  • Locked thread
taupoke
Apr 26, 2008

by T. Finninho
Wish to be a pony with a huuuuuge shlong

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 11:47
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Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 10, 2024 22:04
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Numeron
Mar 23, 2012

A whole new world in
the palm of my hand.
>Switch to bob, yell "He wishes I had hair!"

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 12:28
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Al Borland
Oct 29, 2006

by XyloJW

OMGVBFLOL posted:

This, how is anyone voting for anything but this

I am honestly dumbfounded too. They have the chance to bring Satan and Beelz into the game. And what do they do? Wish to be a loving pony.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 13:21
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Surprisingly Dope
Jan 12, 2011

Lope burgs again

Al Borland posted:

Wish for Satan and Beelz to be in the room with you.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 13:40
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MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO
>wish for the death of the legion of voices who caused all this

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 13:49
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Dely Apple
Apr 22, 2006

Sing me Spanish Techno


 >wish for blood blood blood blood blood blood blood blood

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 13:56
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cock hero flux
Apr 17, 2011



 give both yourself and bob satanic power, fight bob to the death to take terrible revenge

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 13:59
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Tampa Bay Barbie
Oct 30, 2011

Numeron posted:

>Switch to bob, yell "He wishes I had hair!"
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 14:10
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Magissima
Apr 15, 2013

I'd like to introduce you to some of the most special of our rocks and minerals.
Soiled Meat

MariusLecter posted:

>wish for the death of the legion of voices who caused all this
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 14:16
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Hot Dog Day #82
Jul 5, 2003

Soiled Meat

saihttam posted:

> wish that nothing this evening ever happened and you are up in your room playing with ponies. switch to bob
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 14:24
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The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 15:22
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18 Character Limit
Apr 6, 2007

Screw you, Abed;
I can fix this!
Nap Ghost
> save game

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 15:23
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100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 15:24
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CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen
wish for your pony toys back

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 16:59
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Stalins Moustache
Dec 31, 2012

~~**I'm Italian!**~~

Al Borland posted:

Wish for Satan and Beelz to be in the room with you.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 17:12
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net cafe scandal
Mar 18, 2011

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.

this, so we don't have to go to loving equestria

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 17:14
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Archer666
Dec 27, 2008
 Is there any other wish young Byron would make that isn't

>Wish for life to be more like MLP.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 17:25
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Ixtlilton
Mar 10, 2012

How to Draw
by Rube Goldberg

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.

I picked the worst night to go to bed early, but this.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 17:43
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timp
Sep 19, 2007

Everything is in my control
Lipstick Apathy

NoonOwl posted:

Wish to be a beautiful unicorn. Gore Bob.

Hey guys remember when Atma did a CYOA and Satan was in it and he had a minion named Beelz? STOP LIVING IN THE PAST

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 18:23
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Mathhole
Jun 2, 2011

rot in hell, wonderbread.

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 18:42
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A RICH WHITE MAN
Jul 30, 2010

See them other chickenheads? They don't never leave the coop.

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 18:57
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Accretionist
Nov 7, 2012
I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 18:58
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Slurin
Jul 17, 2008
I am a coward who makes grandiose claims and then runs away when asked for evidence. Please ignore everything I have to say.
Byron suddenly loses the ability to speak and can only communicate with emotes for two turns.
> :magical:, :doh:.... :pervert: :newfap: :horse: :gizz:

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 19:21
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Mathhole
Jun 2, 2011

rot in hell, wonderbread.
We all know that loving beelz is going be tripping on mushrooms and chew through our throats, right?

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 19:22
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TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW
>wish that this day never occurred, and everything was back to normal

We are bob, full reset.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 19:54
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blanktester
Aug 28, 2012

Also I saw my hand on blood lying on the ground, and I saw someone with device's like pile bunker and grind with evil smile
Oh my, this thread... I'm really lost on what he should do... I don't even know what to vote for.

I guess wish to be a pony and free your parents, then gut Bob in the parking lot. Then put the moves on Susie, because why the gently caress not.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 20:30
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Cactus Ghost
Dec 20, 2003

you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack
 bronies get the gently caress out, we have a chance to summon satan himself and you want to wish to go to equestria, jesus christ

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 20:35
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zgrowler2
Oct 29, 2011

HOW DOES THE IPHONE APP WORK?? I WILL SPAM ENDLESSLY EVERYWHERE AND DISREGARD ANY REPLIES
Wish for Satan and Beelz to go with you to Equestria.

ASK Satan to CONJURE hellsteed for you. SPIT on Father, UNCHAIN Mother. GO outside, TAKE Susie, RIDE hellsteed to lands unknown with women in tow, RELISH anguished screams of Bob in distance.

zgrowler2 fucked around with this message at 21:02 on Dec 12, 2013

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 20:45
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CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen
I think whatever we wish for we should make sure to keep Bob alive, so this doesn't end.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:10
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Noni
Jul 8, 2003
ASK ME ABOUT DEFRAUDING GOONS WITH HOT DOGS AND HOW I BANNED EPIC HAMCAT
gently caress ponies. Wish for a dog. A cool dog. And a sandwich. A dog and a sandwich.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:12
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Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands
Wish that Lowtax was in the room wearing a pony suit.

Edit: I have no idea what will come of this, but I'm sure we can think of something.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:15
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Al Borland
Oct 29, 2006

by XyloJW

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.

I like this, I like this A LOT.
Anyone who doesn't vote for this is a fedora man child redditor.

Atma if I get any kind of wild card vote for tallying stuff for you I want to pull it here on this.

Al Borland fucked around with this message at 21:28 on Dec 12, 2013

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:20
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walking
Nov 27, 2013

NoonOwl posted:

Wish to be a beautiful unicorn. Gore Bob.
* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:23
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Kid Gloves
Jul 31, 2013

by XyloJW
> summon Beelz

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:26
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Grand Prize Winner
Feb 19, 2007

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.

>conquer

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:27
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CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen

Grand Prize Winner posted:

>conquer

I didn't want to say anything but I am really glad you've been this consistent

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:30
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Seth Pecksniff
May 27, 2004

can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Fucker posted:

>Switch back to wife
>Start speaking to bob in menacing voice
>"hello bob... its us again... your wife has some nice tits, oooooh yeah her tits are great. *dramatic pause* there is nothing you can do about us. we have a holy mission to carry out and its beyond your puny human comprehension. we will awaken."
>Switch back to the kid
>Speak in same menacing voice
>"can you feel it? *audibly shivers* hes calling me. its coming."
>Silently wish for Satan and Beelz to enter the room and bring hell with them.

satan and beelz, with byron as his sidekick

there is nowhere to go but up

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 21:41
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Atma
Sep 16, 2002

College Slice










https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKRRXt8J5YU

Atma fucked around with this message at 22:05 on Dec 12, 2013

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 22:03
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Panamaniac
Jun 18, 2007

HEROES NEVER DIE
 >poop

Edit: Atma, you are an awesome awesome person.

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 22:08
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Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 10, 2024 22:04
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Bjay9
May 3, 2011

Kid, touch is for video games and gynecologists

Atma posted:



:neckbeard:

>challenge Satan for his throne in hell

* # ? Dec 12, 2013 22:08
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  • Locked thread
The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > hey, it's bob
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