Political Cartoons 2014: A bunch of 35-year-old feminist virgin loser weenies

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Political Cartoons 2014: A bunch of 35-year-old feminist virgin loser weenies

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DarklyDreaming: Apr 4, 2009; Fun scary

MisterBadIdea posted:

I don't normally post the Sunday Prickly Citys because they're usually apolitical, but this one I wanted to share because the punchline is so unfathomably lame.

That girl and that coyote were not even alive (Or at least, not old enough to understand planets as a concept) when Pluto was declared to not be a planet. Why would they even mention it?

# ? Apr 27, 2014 20:29

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# ? May 31, 2024 06:54

Bender: May 12, 2001; Fun Shoe

Apple Pie Hubbub posted:

Taxes are evil, but don't you dare cut military spending.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 20:47

marathon Stairmaster sesh: Apr 28, 2009; ALL HAIL CEO NUGGET
1988-PRESENT

DarklyDreaming posted:

That girl and that coyote were not even alive (Or at least, not old enough to understand planets as a concept) when Pluto was declared to not be a planet. Why would they even mention it?

Because Alie is being :smug:

over the idea that we'll reintroduce Pluto as a planet under the bolded class.

the link in the strip posted:

Science at the Frontier

Our solar system contains three zones: the inner, rocky planets; the gas giant planets; and the Kuiper Belt. Pluto is one of the largest bodies of the icy, "third zone" of our solar system. The National Academy of Sciences placed the exploration of the third zone in general - and Pluto-Charon in particular - among its highest priority planetary mission rankings for this decade. New Horizons is NASA's mission to fulfill this objective.
In those zones, our solar system has three classes of planets: the rocky worlds (Earth, Venus, Mercury and Mars); the gas giants (Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune); and the ice dwarfs of the Kuiper Belt. There are far more ice dwarf planets than rocky and gas giant worlds combined - yet, no spacecraft has been sent to a planet in this class. The National Academy of Sciences noted that our knowledge of planetary types is therefore seriously incomplete. As the first mission to investigate this new class of planetary bodies, New Horizons will fill this important gap and round out our knowledge of the planets in our solar system.

Pluto is so a planet, take that liberals.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 20:48

Pants Donkey: Nov 13, 2011

A quiet Sunday, which is the perfect time to inflict some new suffering :getin:

1
This is a movie poster Lietha made mocking a certain movie in theaters that he's been whining about for a good two months now.

2
"Power" in this scenario means "having God bail your rear end out all the time." That or Art is on the recieving end of some holy bukake.

3
Actually, it beats because of a potential created by...actually never mind.

To show that Atheism does not always = GR8, here is atheist webcomic "Jesus and Mo." It's been running for loving ever now, and is basically about Jesus and Mohammed as roommates or lovers or something. But just remember that, when looking at the art, this comic is nearly nine years old.

4
gently caress me, this is really going to suck.

5
In case you're curious, the barmaid is actually a character that literally never appears in the comic. Even in the About section, her portrait is just an empty square.

6
poo poo, they're playing video games. We're about to reach Peak Reddit here. All we need is some smug discussion on femin-

ABORT ABORT :reddit:

# ? Apr 27, 2014 20:54

VitalSigns: Sep 3, 2011

Rorus Raz posted:

1
This is a movie poster Lietha made mocking a certain movie in theaters that he's been whining about for a good two months now.

...so the Ark was a massive construction project with dozens or hundreds of people taking part, and then when the rains came, Noah flipped them the bird and slammed the door?

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:11

Space Cadet Omoly: Jan 15, 2014; ~Groovy~

VitalSigns posted:

...so the Ark was a massive construction project with dozens or hundreds of people taking part, and then when the rains came, Noah flipped them the bird and slammed the door?

If I'm remembering correctly it says his three sons helped him with construction, I think, but that was it.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:34

Samurai Sanders: Nov 4, 2003; Pillbug

Space Cadet Omoly posted:

If I'm remembering correctly it says his three sons helped him with construction, I think, but that was it.

In the movie fallen angels helped them make it...oddly I haven't seen any complaints about that yet.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:35

Sir Tonk: Apr 18, 2006; Young Orc

Jagchosis posted:

The possibilities of things Paul Ryan can poo poo into are endless

oh god

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:41

VitalSigns: Sep 3, 2011

Space Cadet Omoly posted:

If I'm remembering correctly it says his three sons helped him with construction, I think, but that was it.

That doesn't agree with the depiction in the cartoon though. There are workgangs in there

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:48

Broken Loose: Dec 25, 2002; PROGRAM
A > - - - LR > > - - LL > - - -

Marlamaid Swordhand posted:

Because Alie is being over the idea that we'll reintroduce Pluto as a planet under the bolded class.

Pluto is so a planet, take that liberals.

I'll bet you the budget of that entire program that Allie won't recognize the 10-20 new planets that end up being roped in along with Pluto under those standards, including Charon.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:48

Sir Tonk: Apr 18, 2006; Young Orc

Does anyone have those gay versions of the old Jack Chick comics? One was a redraw of the trucker comic and I forget the others, if there were any.

edit

That's the one it's a parody of, but it's not the weird mspaint versions that I found. I was called something ridiculous, like Gay Truckers In Love, and might just have been the cover.

Sir Tonk fucked around with this message at 21:53 on Apr 27, 2014

# ? Apr 27, 2014 21:49

exmarx: Feb 18, 2012; The experience over the years
of nothing getting better
only worse.

R. Mute posted:

Huh. What happened here? Did they go ahead with the drilling? (I'm guessing yes, obviously)

Not yet, I think the drilling companies still need to get consent. Forest Parks are like the tier below National Parks, and he only learned he'd opened it up when a journalist told him :shepface:

It's the same guy in this incredibad interview, so he's probably got a nice oil lobbyist job lined up for when he leaves politics.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:03

Wistful of Dollars: Aug 25, 2009

Sir Tonk posted:

Does anyone have those gay versions of the old Jack Chick comics? One was a redraw of the trucker comic and I forget the others, if there were any.

edit

That's the one it's a parody of, but it's not the weird mspaint versions that I found. I was called something ridiculous, like Gay Truckers In Love, and might just have been the cover.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:05

tacodaemon: Nov 27, 2006

Sir Tonk posted:

Does anyone have those gay versions of the old Jack Chick comics? One was a redraw of the trucker comic and I forget the others, if there were any.

edit

That's the one it's a parody of, but it's not the weird mspaint versions that I found. I was called something ridiculous, like Gay Truckers In Love, and might just have been the cover.

Here you go: http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/archive.html

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:06

The Iron Rose: May 12, 2012; Cat Army

vyelkin posted:

I should mention that that one is from February 2011.

That was when the 2011 beyond the borders action plan was released, wasn't it?

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:17

euclidian88: Aug 3, 2013

Space Cadet Omoly posted:

If I'm remembering correctly it says his three sons helped him with construction, I think, but that was it.

I think in (one of) the pre-bible version of the story The Epic of Gilgamesh he does have helpers and offers them a ride on the ark or all his lands. They take the money from the crazy man and go off laughing, then the rains come...

Also in that version the gods decide to destroy mankind as man is too loud and they can't sleep.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:41

DAD LOST MY IPOD: Feb 3, 2012; Fats Dominar is on the case

Sir Tonk posted:

Does anyone have those gay versions of the old Jack Chick comics? One was a redraw of the trucker comic and I forget the others, if there were any.

edit

That's the one it's a parody of, but it's not the weird mspaint versions that I found. I was called something ridiculous, like Gay Truckers In Love, and might just have been the cover.

This one was given out at college by some weird preacher dude. My roommate (who is gay) and I each got one and read it together over lunch. We both agreed that, even without changing any of the text or pictures, it is one of the gayest things either of us have ever read. It's hard to read it any way other than "hairy bear and his little twink are seduced by a hyper-masc muscleboy."

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:49

Saint Sputnik: Apr 1, 2007; Tyrannosaurs in P-51 Volkswagens!

Rorus Raz posted:

But don't you dare use your freedom as an American to say anything bad about an America

# ? Apr 27, 2014 22:56

Kiwi Ghost Chips: Feb 19, 2011; Start using the best desktop environment now!
Choose KDE!

Rorus Raz posted:

3

Uses voice box powered by nerve that detours all the way around his heart because of nerves designed by... a very stupid god.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 23:05

VitalSigns: Sep 3, 2011

# ? Apr 27, 2014 23:07

Post 9-11 User: Apr 14, 2010

Kiwi Ghost Chips posted:

Uses voice box powered by nerve that detours all the way around his heart because of nerves designed by... a very stupid god.

When they pull things out of their rear end which is very close to the vestigial tale Super Cloud Captain designed.

Remember, people actually believe this poo poo:

Holy crap, while looking for that I found other things that are 100% sincere:

5
Always trust quotes from Real Doctors In Stock Photos.

VitalSigns posted:

A heart that is moving to the Hate That Amerikkka Beat.

# ? Apr 27, 2014 23:23

Mo_Steel: Mar 7, 2008; Let's Clock Into The Sunset Together; Fun Shoe

Rorus Raz posted:

2

# ? Apr 28, 2014 00:28

Deceitful Penguin: Feb 16, 2011

Xander77 posted:

You know... I'm going to assume that was a particularly devious bit of reverse psychology meant to make me question the value of my entire recent posting history.

...

It worked

Nah, I was behind and read a bunch in a row. Not everything I post is trolling.

tacodaemon posted:

Here you go: http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/archive.html

That is magnificent.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 00:37

Nostalgia4Infinity: Feb 27, 2007; 10,000 YEARS WASN'T ENOUGH LURKING

He's talking about universal health care right?

# ? Apr 28, 2014 00:45

Shugojin: Sep 6, 2007; THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...

Nostalgia4Infinity posted:

He's talking about universal health care right?

Surely some system where we don't rely on a third party to turn a profit while still paying some people's bills maybe a little bit.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 00:48

Swan Oat: Oct 9, 2012; I was selected for my skill.

Post 9-11 User posted:

4
Always trust quotes from Real Doctors In Stock Photos.

That actually is a real picture of Dr. Ben Carson and a real thing that he said.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 00:59

Fulchrum: Apr 16, 2013; by R. Guyovich

And he's still completely insane. Living proof that talent and skill within a high complexity area does not mean one knows anything about the world outside that area.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:03

Somfin: Oct 25, 2010; In my🦚 experience🛠️ the big things🌑 don't teach you anything🤷‍♀️.; Nap Ghost

Fulchrum posted:

And he's still completely insane. Living proof that talent and skill within a high complexity area does not mean one knows anything about the world outside that area.

To paraphrase Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal:

"Let's recruit the clergy! Their devastating diagonal moves cannot be defended against!" - a chess grandmaster on war strategy.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:06

Linguica: Jul 13, 2000; You're already dead

Mo_Steel posted:

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:13

Jenny Angel: Oct 24, 2010; Out of Control
Hard to Regulate
Anything Goes!; Lipstick Apathy

Mo_Steel posted:

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:17

Plutonis: Mar 25, 2011

Mo_Steel posted:

holy poo poo he really does look like Serj :eyepop:

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:19

JaggerMcDagger: Feb 13, 2012; Bringing you Barry from the sordid depths of the Internet

And the award to the cartoon that most butchers a pop culture reference goes to:

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:19

Swan Oat: Oct 9, 2012; I was selected for my skill.

PuLeaking AmRad? What the gently caress?

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:26

Sir Tonk: Apr 18, 2006; Young Orc

tacodaemon posted:

Here you go: http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/archive.html

Nope, not that one. That's the mspaint looking ones I was talking about. This one was hand drawn. I think I saw it in the Freep thread when a bunch of Chicktracts showed up for some reason, probably Moon God?.

edit

Fulchrum posted:

And he's still completely insane. Living proof that talent and skill within a high complexity area does not mean one knows anything about the world outside that area.

If you don't know Carson, you should check out his thing at the prayer breakfast last year. Dude is a serious flat tax rear end in a top hat.

Sir Tonk fucked around with this message at 01:32 on Apr 28, 2014

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:27

Jenny Angel: Oct 24, 2010; Out of Control
Hard to Regulate
Anything Goes!; Lipstick Apathy

Sir Tonk posted:

If you don't know Carson, you should check out his thing at the prayer breakfast last year. Dude is a serious flat tax rear end in a top hat.

I might be mistaken, but my understanding was that until his speech, the National Prayer Breakfast was generally seen as an avenue for making inoffensive, feel-good speeches that only got tangentially political. And then Carson showed up and started talking about important faith-based issues such as Obamacare and the flat tax. Am I misrepresenting the event here?

# ? Apr 28, 2014 01:43

Post 9-11 User: Apr 14, 2010

So, apparently freegan crust punk survivalists exist? They made the image below, then some rear end in a top hat added the leering Jew Troll later.

I don't like either group of people (the apoco-punks or the bridge trolls).

# ? Apr 28, 2014 02:00

Captain_Maclaine: Sep 30, 2001; Every moment that I'm alive, I pray for death!

Post 9-11 User posted:

So, apparently freegan crust punk survivalists exist? They made the image below, then some rear end in a top hat added the leering Jew Troll later.

I don't like either group of people (the apoco-punks or the bridge trolls).

I didn't know anti-Semitism was all that big of a concern in The Zone, stalker.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 02:04

sexpig by night: Sep 8, 2011; by Azathoth

Post 9-11 User posted:

So, apparently freegan crust punk survivalists exist? They made the image below, then some rear end in a top hat added the leering Jew Troll later.

I don't like either group of people (the apoco-punks or the bridge trolls).

Are you sure it was added later because literally every survivalist I've met hated blacks and Jews pretty much to the point of, you know, becoming survivalists.

# ? Apr 28, 2014 02:16