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GILF Hunter posted:I'm only worried about me being happy. And my family. And my friends. You are none of those things, thank goodness. Alas, thank you for confirming that you have literally no idea what you're talking about -- my parents don't even live in this state. Alas, it was my misunderstanding because you are unemployed for the last 3 months*, and it is beyond my experience how recent grads support themselves without a job, I did assume you were living at home. *feel free to split that hair
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Aug 16, 2014 05:14
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GILF Hunter posted:This forum feels that career should stand above all else -- as I expected. My request for advice elsewhere has yielded different results. But hey, who am I to give advice, I used to live in a singlewide so gently caress me, right?
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Aug 16, 2014 05:15
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GILF Hunter posted:Right, I agree wholeheartedly. From my standpoint, there seems to be a little more compromise than I may be willing to accept. The thing is that all three of those things are workable and are largely dependent on your performance. Your pay may not be at the top of the curve, but people can and do get raises for good performance after awhile, even after they reach the top of the starting salary cap. Likewise, this job may not be relevant to your interests, but it may lead to other opportunities that are, either with a different employer or with the same one. Hell, you may find that your interests change. The friends thing is pretty simple, honestly. Be friends with your coworkers. You'll be doing the same thing, so there's your common ground right there, and you probably have more in common than you might think. After you've been there a week or two, ask a couple of them out for drinks later, or whatever you guys do down there.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:18
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I guess it's not the end of the world to not accept this offer if you feel that you can get something better soon, though I have no idea about your industry and it doesn't seem like you're having much luck in the job search. So maybe you should just accept the job and if you don't like it or get tired of the commute, then you could just apply to other places after six months. But if you feel that there are lots of other possibilities for you and you can get one of them soon, then go ahead and decline it. Are there lots of jobs in this field?
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Aug 16, 2014 05:20
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moana posted:I'm glad that you are asking around so that you can pick and choose the advice you want and ignore everything else. You're thinking we're saying that you should take this job because we just like jobs. We're saying take this job because you sound like a child and it's time to grow up. Sorry it's not the advice you want, maybe go back to posting where they tell you what you want to hear. How does one pick and choose the advice they want to hear? Advice comes from both sides. You have to choose a side and go with it. Just because you disagree with it doesn't mean it's wrong. But I must ask, were you as miserable in that singlewide as you are now?
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Aug 16, 2014 05:21
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GILF Hunter posted:For whatever it's worth, I would not be leaching off of my parents. I'd be working and supporting their small business, which happens to be well known and well respected in the community in which it resides. Happens to be something I enjoy too, which is nice. Now I understand why you think you're above the dirty poors, you're the stereotypical rich kid.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:22
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TwoSheds posted:The thing is that all three of those things are workable and are largely dependent on your performance. Your pay may not be at the top of the curve, but people can and do get raises for good performance after awhile, even after they reach the top of the starting salary cap. Likewise, this job may not be relevant to your interests, but it may lead to other opportunities that are, either with a different employer or with the same one. Hell, you may find that your interests change. I agree. And while I did comment about 39k being less than my colleagues (or whatever we'll call them), I acknowledge it is still a very livable income. Honestly, I would say pay is the least important factor of those three, within reason. 39k is within reason; it's just discouraging to know that I could be making more. I disagree however on the friends thing. (Hell, I didn't make too many friends in this thread.) The city is small; there are few employees. There's no nightlife at all. I searched for "bars" on Yelp and the highest rated place open past 10 pm was Applebees. I met the people I would be working with, and they are not my age. I assure you that we do not have common interests (that is, I don't hunt, fish, or go muddin'). In browsing these and other forums, one of the suggesting I've seen for people who consider themselves lacking in friends is to meet new people who have common interests. But even resources like Reddit or Meetup.com for that city redirect to the city in which I currently live an hour away. I'll say yes -- not everyone is a gun shootin', truck drivin' redneck up there, but it's discouraging to think about having a small pool of resources to work with. It's actually the thing that's been of greatest consideration, and why I would likely continue to live where I am and commute. Of course, this subforum is not about making friends.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:32
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GILF Hunter posted:I agree. And while I did comment about 39k being less than my colleagues (or whatever we'll call them), I acknowledge it is still a very livable income. Honestly, I would say pay is the least important factor of those three, within reason. 39k is within reason; it's just discouraging to know that I could be making more. Have you tried gun shootin' and truck drivin'? I mean I'm probably as goony as you, but even I get along in my podunk little town in northern MI. It's one of those places where you need to make your own fun instead of buying it.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:35
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mongeese posted:I guess it's not the end of the world to not accept this offer if you feel that you can get something better soon, though I have no idea about your industry and it doesn't seem like you're having much luck in the job search. So maybe you should just accept the job and if you don't like it or get tired of the commute, then you could just apply to other places after six months. But if you feel that there are lots of other possibilities for you and you can get one of them soon, then go ahead and decline it. One of problems, if you want to call it that, is that I really want to work in the public sector (city, county, state government, or a non-profit). There are jobs ALL the time in my field. However, I think one of the issues is that planning is obviously location-based. Things vary from state to state, county to county. So while I may be qualified for a position in Oregon along with a dozen other people, planning in Oregon is a lot different than planning in my state. I feel that it's more likely that that municipalities want to hire people who have studied and worked in the region in which they're applying to, especially since "knowledge of [this locale]'s comprehensive plan" is frequently a requirement. There's a lot of similarities, but there's a lot of differences too. tl;dr: All but one of my interviews have been in the south. I don't see that as a coincidence.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:37
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Rudager posted:Now I understand why you think you're above the dirty poors, you're the stereotypical rich kid. You clearly don't know what a stereotypical rich kid is. My family is far from rich. My parents never bought me a brand new car. They didn't pay for any of my school. Move along, troll.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:38
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I feel like you are not even considering our side. Just don't take the job (since that is what you want) and hopefully you can find something else before you are taking over the family business instead (where the masters is relevant how?).
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Aug 16, 2014 05:41
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Eskaton posted:Have you tried gun shootin' and truck drivin'? I mean I'm probably as goony as you, but even I get along in my podunk little town in northern MI. It's one of those places where you need to make your own fun instead of buying it. I have. My current city is a college town surrounded southern people. In undergrad, I worked for a grocery store which catered predominantly to people who are "from" the college town (as opposed to students). I definitely met people and made friends and interacted with those who lived lifestyle that was new and different to me, but those relationships are definitely not as strong as the ones I made with people in college. I wouldn't consider myself TOO goony, but I do have some pretty goony friends.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:44
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It's pretty douchebaggy to judge people based on stereotypes without even really meeting them. I don't like shooting either, doesn't stop me getting along with people that do though.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:46
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spwrozek posted:I feel like you are not even considering our side. Just don't take the job (since that is what you want) and hopefully you can find something else before you are taking over the family business instead (where the masters is relevant how?). I do see your side. What I want is for someone to see my side. I value being happy. I would like to live in a place where I don't feel trapped and alone. I feel that is perfectly fair. This thread says "gently caress being happy for now, just go work there because you need a career and that's the most important thing". That's difficult for me to swallow given how I've lived my life to this point.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:47
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GILF Hunter posted:One of problems, if you want to call it that, is that I really want to work in the public sector (city, county, state government, or a non-profit). There are jobs ALL the time in my field. However, I think one of the issues is that planning is obviously location-based. Things vary from state to state, county to county. So while I may be qualified for a position in Oregon along with a dozen other people, planning in Oregon is a lot different than planning in my state. I feel that it's more likely that that municipalities want to hire people who have studied and worked in the region in which they're applying to, especially since "knowledge of [this locale]'s comprehensive plan" is frequently a requirement. There's a lot of similarities, but there's a lot of differences too. You couldn't be more wrong. You aren't getting interviews elsewhere because at that pay and the apparent number of people in the field why would they take a chance on an unproven person and move them or tell them to move. If your education was good a local knowledge wouldn't matter. This argument makes little sense to me.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:48
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Rudager posted:It's pretty douchebaggy to judge people based on stereotypes without even really meeting them. It's more than just shooting guns, come on. I'm not judging people based upon stereotypes; I've lived in the south my whole life, and in this part of the state for 10 years. The thing is that if City of Many Doublewide Trailers had a bunch of people living in it that shared interests with me, it would be a much greater city than it is. It would have more than 10,000 people living in it. It would have a nightlife of some kind. Yes, not every single person there is the total opposite of me, I'm not saying that. But with less people to meet and bond over interests, it concerns me that I will be alone.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:54
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GILF Hunter posted:I do see your side. What I want is for someone to see my side. I value being happy. I would like to live in a place where I don't feel trapped and alone. I feel that is perfectly fair. I understand what you are saying but if you don't start your career and take advantage of what you have on front of you, you might never get where you want. People sacrifice happiness to do that. Why do you think I told you about my situation. I see my wife at most 2 days a week, but the sacrifice will be worth it. Can you sacrifice to start your career and give yourself a chance at long term happiness?
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Aug 16, 2014 05:56
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spwrozek posted:Can you sacrifice to start your career and give yourself a chance at long term happiness? That's the million dollar question.
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Aug 16, 2014 05:57
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spwrozek posted:You couldn't be more wrong. You aren't getting interviews elsewhere because at that pay and the apparent number of people in the field why would they take a chance on an unproven person and move them or tell them to move. I'm not saying my assumption is true. I really don't have any idea for sure. Does anyone? Job hunting sucks and there's a million reasons why Joe could get picked over Bob. GILF Hunter fucked around with this message at 06:00 on Aug 16, 2014 |
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Aug 16, 2014 05:58
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This thread is hilarious. BFC is not going to justify your decision to care about your illusory perception of some perfect lifestyle that is somehow impossible to attain in the city where this job is. You can reply to everyone whining about how you don't like some part of their advice, but all of our advice is the same: - take the job - keep looking for ~your~supreme~fulfillment~ and go take it if you find it. That's how the job market works. As someone who has been employed in a professional job and therefore has infinitely more experience than you on these matters, trust me on this. - actually consider meeting some new people and doing new things for once in your life instead of writing off an entire group of people as "muddin' rednecks" Close this thread, and decline the offer. Also remember that you may never get another entry job in your industry again. The longer you go without working in the field, the harder it gets to get entry jobs. Tons of people have told you this, and you've just glossed over it every time.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:01
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GILF Hunter posted:I do see your side. What I want is for someone to see my side. I value being happy. I would like to live in a place where I don't feel trapped and alone. I feel that is perfectly fair. Your feelings are valid, but the thing you have to remember is that the unhappiness in this situation will be temporary. You can't expect to be happy for your entire life and never encounter hardship. It may happen, as in this case, that you will have to bring hardship upon yourself in order to achieve happiness in the future. And while you could bypass this hardship to be comfortable and safe at home, you might potentially do serious harm to your career, and you would miss out on a great chance to build character and raise your self-esteem by doing something you didn't think you were capable of.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:02
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GILF Hunter posted:But I must ask, were you as miserable in that singlewide as you are now?  It honestly sounds like you're projecting.You come across as a brittle, entitled brat, especially with your bizarre  YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!  complex.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:06
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TwoSheds posted:Your feelings are valid, but the thing you have to remember is that the unhappiness in this situation will be temporary. You can't expect to be happy for your entire life and never encounter hardship. It may happen, as in this case, that you will have to bring hardship upon yourself in order to achieve happiness in the future. And while you could bypass this hardship to be comfortable and safe at home, you might potentially do serious harm to your career, and you would miss out on a great chance to build character and raise your self-esteem by doing something you didn't think you were capable of. This is how some of these posts should have been worded.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:06
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Cicero posted:There you go with your obsession with other people's happiness. News flash: just because someone thinks you're an idiot or a douche doesn't mean they're desperately unhappy. News flash: If you're getting mad about something that impacts you in no way whatsoever, you're probably a pretty angry and unhappy person.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:09
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GILF Hunter posted:This thread says "gently caress being happy for now, just go work there because you need a career and that's the most important thing". That's difficult for me to swallow given how I've lived my life to this point. You're like a fat person coming into YLLS and asking how best to quit a diet and keep eating donuts. Put down the donuts and get to lifting weights! Yeah, you'll be sore at first, but then you'll be swole. Or go ahead and keep on eating donuts until somebody offers you a magical cake that turns calories into muscle instead of fat. I'm sure that will happen real soon. GILF Hunter posted:This is how some of these posts should have been worded. Maybe we wouldn't have been so harsh if your OP wasn't worded like you were an entitled jackass who hated poor people. Just sayin~
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Aug 16, 2014 06:10
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GILF Hunter posted:This is how some of these posts should have been worded. GILF Hunter posted:News flash: If you're getting mad about something that impacts you in no way whatsoever, you're probably a pretty angry and unhappy person.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:11
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moana posted:Maybe we wouldn't have been so harsh if your OP wasn't worded like you were an entitled jackass who hated poor people. Just sayin~ He only hates the poor people who don't have graduate degrees and therefore deserve to be poor.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:13
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Cicero posted:Right, because if someone criticizes you obviously they must just be seething at their keyboard, right? They're certainly not laughing at someone who is thirty one years old and still crying about blunt language on the internet. I mean, you could be doing something else with your time other than getting all worked up about it and then posting about it on the internet.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:17
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at the date posted:He only hates the poor people who don't have graduate degrees and therefore deserve to be poor. That's a stretch, but I can see you didn't comprehend what I was getting at. Nonetheless, I'll take the blame for my poor wording so you can feel better about yourself.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:18
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GILF Hunter posted:I mean, you could be doing something else with your time other than getting all worked up about it and then posting about it on the internet.  So could you, broseph. It seems as if you are the one that is mad, given your obsessive need to reply to every single person in this thread.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:18
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GILF Hunter posted:I am a bit pessimistic perhaps regarding relationships with other humans, which is admittedly part of my concern, but I have some optimism in my career that a better opportunity will eventually come along (and while not loving over my employer). I don't think that's really all that unfair? Relationships with other humans are what will get you those better opportunities. I have a friend doing her dream job at the federal level (in your field, doing survey/planning/GIS work), and she spent a year building houses for Habitat for Humanity just to make connections to get there. It barely paid the bills, it wasn't even close to what she wanted to do long-term, but it was in the city she wanted to stay in and the experience put her in touch with the right people. On the other hand, I went to school with a guy who had a reputation for being difficult in group projects, and word of mouth basically made him unemployable in that entire city. Many of us got jobs right away, and no one wanted to work with him again. GILF Hunter posted:I don't think it's unreasonable to think that I will find a job that suits my skills/interests/etc and isn't in a place where I feel trapped. A very common government career path is to get a junior level job after undergrad, then work there while pursuing the advanced degree that's needed for the next pay grade. Those folks get government experience and a government-funded advanced degree. That's the trajectory you're competing with. Your potential employer may already be investing money in your competition, so I think it's wise for you to be cautious. GILF Hunter posted:I do see your side. What I want is for someone to see my side. I value being happy. I would like to live in a place where I don't feel trapped and alone. I feel that is perfectly fair. My company just interviewed a woman with a Master's in Biology for an entry-level software testing position. We even employ people with legal degrees and various Master's degrees just to do data entry. They're certainly over-qualified, but they also aren't getting any offers that would rescue them. I think you're lucky to have gotten a job offer that's even remotely related to your field.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:18
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moana posted:Not a single person is saying that in this thread. We are saying that you will be happier in the long run if you stop being a child and living like a child and start living in the real world as an adult. That's a terrible analogy. Thank you for continuing to show that you don't understand my dilemma.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:20
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Everybody here is telling me how stupid and wrong I am! They must all be angry miserable people! There's nothing wrong with me at all, it's all them being so mad mad mad! Let me post forever about how mad they are! *back to crafting a resume which will truly showcase my brilliance for a deserving employer*
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Aug 16, 2014 06:20
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Cicero posted:There you go with your obsession with other people's happiness. News flash: just because someone thinks you're an idiot or a douche doesn't mean they're desperately unhappy. You forgot the need to have work be a social outlet as well. Gotta have fun. Must be happy.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:20
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Bisty Q. posted:
I came here for the advice. I'd like people to know that I'm reading both the worthwhile contributions as well as the pointless crap like this quoted post.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:22
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GILF Hunter posted:Thank you for continuing to show that you don't understand my dilemma.
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Aug 16, 2014 06:22
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GILF Hunter posted:I mean, you could be doing something else with your time other than getting all worked up about it and then posting about it on the internet. 
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Aug 16, 2014 06:24
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LoreOfSerpents posted:Relationships with other humans are what will get you those better opportunities. I have a friend doing her dream job at the federal level (in your field, doing survey/planning/GIS work), and she spent a year building houses for Habitat for Humanity just to make connections to get there. It barely paid the bills, it wasn't even close to what she wanted to do long-term, but it was in the city she wanted to stay in and the experience put her in touch with the right people. Thank you for an intelligent and thought out post. I have spent a lot of time in school, I realize that. There was a considerable gap between high school and college filled with things that have absolutely nothing to do with this thread. Alas, I'm aware my age is a factor, and I realized when I started school. The alternative was a thrilling career in retail. I'm proud I turned my life around, and am fully aware that I need to now take steps to continue to move along. Right now, it's just a matter of how to handle that. GILF Hunter fucked around with this message at 06:30 on Aug 16, 2014 |
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Aug 16, 2014 06:27
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moana posted:Ah, the dilemma of an unemployed person with a job offer in hand. How best to turn them down, indeed... Ah, the person who clearly doesn't understand why I'm having the dilemma in the first place. Must be all these dang poor people or something!
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Aug 16, 2014 06:28
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Cicero posted:You know what they say, laughter is the best medicine. Agreed. And I do enjoy a hearty chuckle at someone who gets worked up over nothing. It's just not worth it!
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Aug 16, 2014 06:28
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