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thats right boys and girls its time for your second installment of suckin your own dick megathread! its time to suck your own dick again, like you did last year! share tips tricks secrets techniques and tidbits pertaining to self suck heres some guidelines to help you wile away those lonely nights: - the importance of stretching cannot be overstated - that beer gut? not helping - keep a phone handy! in case you hurt yourself - have. a. gameplan!! this cannot be emphasised too much. unless youve got a pretty long johnson or are in the cirque de soleil your going to be upside when you hit the jackpot, like tyhis:  get water up your nose when you do a cannonball? imagine water, but thick and salty and theres microscopic organisms trying to imregnate your sinuses! yuck! swallowing yourself is a PRO maneuvre do not rush into things. blow on your own chest or neck if you have to but watch the eyes it's not a joke. ok your turn! share, share, share! 
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Jan 16, 2015 04:23
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 20:32 |
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im gay
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Jan 16, 2015 04:24
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TEAYCHES posted:im gay that's totally ok! it's not gay to suck your own dick but it's not not gay either! welcome, friend.
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Jan 16, 2015 04:24
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is it gay to cum on your own face?
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Jan 16, 2015 04:25
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I did this once
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Jan 16, 2015 04:25
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Sweet Tea posted:is it gay to cum on your own face? are you thinking about a dick cumming on your face when your dick cums on your face? if not, no
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Jan 16, 2015 04:26
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for some raisin touching it seems ok, putting in or near mouth not ok. can some female ladies confirm?
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Jan 16, 2015 04:26
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does it really look bigger when it's going into your mouth?
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Jan 16, 2015 04:30
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itsgotmetoo posted:does it really look bigger when it's going into your mouth? yeah it looks freakin huge! good question
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Jan 16, 2015 04:35
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I was dating this one vegan girl and we were doing yoga a few times a week for several months. A running joke that we had was that one of these days I was going to be able to suck my own cock and she was into that poo poo because she thought it was hot. We were doing bikram yoga in Chinatown one time just ripped on this hash and I felt something kind of pop in my lower back. It didn't hurt really, just felt like this odd pull. I didn't think much of it at the time so we put our clothes back on and longboarded back to the loft. I was having a bit of a soak in the tub when I felt, no, I just knew that I could do it. I called skyy to the bathroom and I told her to get the goji berries because I was ready. We went to the kitchen and I sat on the floor. I stooped my back over and began to lower my head towards my pelvis. I had gotten this far before, but today was different. I was able to roll my sacrum upwards and inward, directly depositing the head of my penis firmly into my mouth. I was already rock hard. I wasn't able to deepthroat myself or even close, just kind of jerk off my cock in my mouth while licking and sucking on the head until I climaxed and sucked out every drop. My girl rubbed herself out furiously the entire time, moaning about oh how that's so hot baby. I had done it. I hung up my yoga mat and retired from autofellatio
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Jan 16, 2015 04:36
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mookface posted:I was dating this one vegan girl and we were doing yoga a few times a week for several months. A running joke that we had was that one of these days I was going to be able to suck my own cock and she was into that poo poo because she thought it was hot. this is really well written and evocative but i have to ask, what did you do with the goji berries?
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Jan 16, 2015 04:41
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fanged wang posted:this is really well written and evocative but i have to ask, what did you do with the goji berries? I was taking the advice of a sagely old Chinese man who told me they were an aphrodisiac. He pointed to his dick and made this fist pumping gesture and slapped his arm and made this trilling aggressive growl so I figured buddy was on to something and he was. Eat half a pound of those things and you will maintain the most turgid boners. You will also poo poo a bunch a few hours later but whatever
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Jan 16, 2015 04:46
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Don't go chasing waterfalls, op
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Jan 16, 2015 04:47
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satan has got his claws horns tail and member deeeep into you young folk. yall dont need a dick in the mouth what you need is prayer and to get off the yoga mat and get your sweaty sinewy little booties down to United Methodist and ask Jesus for forgiveness
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Jan 16, 2015 04:47
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keep doing yoga til you get rid of that gag reflex and tell me the story slower
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Jan 16, 2015 04:48
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i hate my dick. i wouldnt suck my dick with your dick
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Jan 16, 2015 04:48
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mookface posted:I was taking the advice of a sagely old Chinese man who told me they were an aphrodisiac. He pointed to his dick and made this fist pumping gesture and slapped his arm and made this trilling aggressive growl so I figured buddy was on to something and he was. Eat half a pound of those things and you will maintain the most turgid boners. You will also poo poo a bunch a few hours later but whatever in my self suck journeys i have noted that extreme turgidity is absolutely crucial to "bridging the gap" next time ive got a hankerin for my own dick i will head to chinatown and inquire politely
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Jan 16, 2015 04:50
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i fed my dick after midnight, what do I do?
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Jan 16, 2015 04:52
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fanged wang posted:in my self suck journeys i have noted that extreme turgidity is absolutely crucial to "bridging the gap" They also had these dried lizards that you can make a wicked tea out of for your 'mojo' and I was doing that for a bit but things started to get a little bit too real for me so I gave it up 
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Jan 16, 2015 04:53
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good luck going to chinatown and not eating dick
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Jan 16, 2015 04:53
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awesome cougars
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Jan 16, 2015 04:54
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mookface posted:They also had these dried lizards that you can make a wicked tea out of for your 'mojo' and I was doing that for a bit but things started to get a little bit too real for me so I gave it up I don't feel too bad because I have had Tokay Geckos bite the gently caress out of me, but now they're selling them as the cure for AIDS lol.
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Jan 16, 2015 05:01
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mookface posted:I was doing that for a bit but things started to get a little bit too real for me so I gave it up I'll bite. What does this mean?
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Jan 16, 2015 05:01
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site posted:I'll bite. What does this mean? They gave me aids
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Jan 16, 2015 05:03
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is this vegan?
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Jan 16, 2015 05:03
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site posted:I'll bite. wrong thread
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Jan 16, 2015 05:03
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social vegan posted:wrong thread yeah don't do this for real
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Jan 16, 2015 05:05
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social vegan posted:wrong thread yeah okay this made me lol in the library thanks
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Jan 16, 2015 05:07
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they call it a "blow job" because you blow into the penishole like dizzy gillespe and it causes great pleasure, try it now
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Jan 16, 2015 05:08
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leave your mouth open. LEAVE. YOUR. loving. MOUTH. OPEN. i cannot emphasize this enough. you will NEVER be able to suck your own dick unless you -- say it with me now -- LEAVE YOUR MOUTH OPEN!!!!
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Jan 16, 2015 05:09
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JiveHonky posted:they call it a "blow job" because you blow into the penishole like dizzy gillespe and it causes great pleasure, try it now I thought you were supposed to suck the dick like you are darius rucker...
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Jan 16, 2015 05:10
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I found out when I was finally able to achieve it, at age 11. Since I was about 8, I had the urge to suck dick, and since the only one available was my own, I tried, and tried, and tried until I was able to achieve victory in the form of my dickhead in my lips. However, the effort involved was such that I stopped doing so when I realized it was much easier to simply suck other boys's dicks, at age 12. And I never went back after that...
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Jan 16, 2015 05:12
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I can't quite reach yet, but, I too feel the urge to gobble my knobble. I basically do what has been stressed: stretch, get on my shoulders with my back up against a wall and inch my pelvis as near to my face as possible. I feel so close that pre cum starts oozing out in anticipation but I can't reach my mouth. Yet. I came up with a solution, though. It's kind of cheating, but then again so is using a dildo or fleshlight. I found a perfect mom and pop burger joint about a mile away, walking there is a good warm up. I get the biggest, juiciest burger I can, two patties, tomatoes, onions, extra bacon, mustard, no goddamn lettuce. I leave out the mayo so I don't visually get turned on by the white creaminess and cum too early and end up having a messy pair of underpants instead of an eyeful of hot jizz, which is the obvious objective. I get into position like normal, grab that burger and use it as that link between my mouth and pulsating member. If you try it, stick the burger in the microwave for just fifteen seconds on high for optimum warm tingles. Just remember to wash your face and hair afterwards in case of surprise visitors 
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Jan 16, 2015 05:14
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gggiiimmmppp posted:I found out when I was finally able to achieve it, at age 11. ladies and gentleman self suck prodigy gggiiimmmppp! thank you for this autoerotic inspiration
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Jan 16, 2015 05:14
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JiveHonky posted:satan has got his claws horns tail and member deeeep into you young folk. yall dont need a dick in the mouth what you need is prayer and to get off the yoga mat and get your sweaty sinewy little booties down to United Methodist and ask Jesus for forgiveness If Jesus wants autofellatio tips he can just read this thread like everyone else.
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Jan 16, 2015 05:16
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social vegan posted:keep doing yoga til you get rid of that gag reflex and tell me the story slower Make a girly fist (thumb tucked under the other fingers) with your left hand. Gag reflex gone. Tell your girlfriend about it, no need to thank me.
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Jan 16, 2015 05:22
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fanged wang posted:thats right boys and girls its time for your second installment of suckin your own dick megathread! its time to suck your own dick again, like you did last year! share tips tricks secrets techniques and tidbits pertaining to self suck long time fan and first time caller ive been sucking my own dick for over a decade now never going back god bless
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Jan 16, 2015 05:25
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How about just a little peck on the lips? Like kissing your child goodnight. e: 
ruddiger fucked around with this message at 07:51 on Jan 16, 2015 |
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Jan 16, 2015 07:47
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i just wish i could lick my balls too ad astra per aspera
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Jan 16, 2015 07:57
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 20:32 |
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I bet I'm not the only one who has dreams where I'm able to suck my own dick. You know, suddenly it's long enough that I can bend over and put my mouth around most of it. As one would expect, I always notice in the dream that I can't feel anything. This situation has happened enough times that occasionally I notice the fact that I can't feel anything despite me sucking myself and suddenly know that this must be a dream.
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Jan 16, 2015 08:00
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