What weapons do you own

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > What weapons do you own

«‹›9 »

Harrower: Nov 30, 2002

Pillow case partially filled with used urinal cakes.

# ? May 20, 2015 09:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 27, 2024 15:33

HUGE SPACEKABLOOIE: Mar 31, 2010

SuperSoaker CPS2000

Mk I

# ? May 20, 2015 09:13

JB50: Feb 13, 2008

Am I doing this right?

# ? May 20, 2015 09:13

Tashan Dorrsett: Apr 10, 2015; by Deplorable exmarx

JB50 posted:

Am I doing this right?

# ? May 20, 2015 09:15

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

JB50 posted:

LOL if you dont have a 50 BMG with API rounds. Just LOL.

<--------

I have fired a 50 before and it wasn't fun I wouldn't recommend it

# ? May 20, 2015 10:02

My Q-Face: Jul 8, 2002; A dumb racist who need to kill themselves

I'm a much better shot with an M16/M4 than I am with my 30.06 hunting rifle. I'd consider buying an AR for hunting if .223 weren't a poo poo caliber for anything bigger than a squirrel.

Maybe one of those modern M-14 EBRs, they're compact and they're semi-auto. The nice thing about modern semi-auto ARs is that the springs and buffer that drive the semi-auto mechanism absorb a lot of the recoil.

# ? May 20, 2015 10:17

Jim Barris: Aug 13, 2009

I own a switchblade, it fell off the back of a truck meant for a military supply kind of store so its pretty vicious. It's actually illegal, I think, but cops only care about knife laws if you're black it seems cause Ive gotten searched and they've even given the thing back to me afterwards.

# ? May 20, 2015 10:18

Wild T: Dec 15, 2008; The point I'm trying to make is that the only way to come out on top is to kick the Air Force in the nuts, beart it savagely with a weight and take a dump on it's face.

None, because I literally live in the middle of the ocean with only a few hundred people and have nothing of value to steal.

But I left a Saiga-12 and a Glock 20 with some family in the states. Never kept them for home defense, but because they're just fun as gently caress to take to the range. Plus I bought them both in Alaska and the Saiga loaded with 10 slugs is the ultimate 'gently caress you' to a bear and the Glock is great for ~~a backup if the shotgun goes down~~ shooting myself in the head rather than be mauled to death by a wounded grizzly.

# ? May 20, 2015 10:37

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

My Q-Face posted:

I'm a much better shot with an M16/M4 than I am with my 30.06 hunting rifle.

That's really strange. Consider having someone watch you shoot it?

# ? May 20, 2015 10:59

concerned mom: Apr 22, 2003; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Wild T posted:

None, because I literally live in the middle of the ocean with only a few hundred people and have nothing of value to steal.

But I left a Saiga-12 and a Glock 20 with some family in the states. Never kept them for home defense, but because they're just fun as gently caress to take to the range. Plus I bought them both in Alaska and the Saiga loaded with 10 slugs is the ultimate 'gently caress you' to a bear and the Glock is great for ~~a backup if the shotgun goes down~~ shooting myself in the head rather than be mauled to death by a wounded grizzly.

Can't you make like a sharpened piece of conch or something.

# ? May 20, 2015 11:08

ZombieParts: Jul 18, 2009; ASK ME ABOUT VISITING PROSTITUTES IN CHINA AND FEELING NO SHAME. MY FRIEND IS SERIOUSLY THE (PATHETIC) YODA OF PAYING WOMEN TO TOUCH HIS (AND MY) DICK. THEY WOULDN'T DO IT OTHERWISE.

Nooner posted:

Do you think there might be a n-n-n-n-THUG in my building?

*stuffs loaded gun under pillow*

*shoots wife as she tries to slip back into room without waking me after using the bathroom*

There's a break-in video that's been circulating around. Three dudes break into a house in the middle of the night. Some cats come and watch them. As they are leaving one of the occupants wakes up and runs in with a pistol. She takes a random shot in the darkness and manages to shoot a hole in a window. This wakes up the other occupant who wakes up dopey as loving hell. A revolver magically appears in his hand but he's still half a sleep so he uses the revolver to prop himself up while he tries to get oriented. He manages to get to his feet and stumbles down the stairs like a drunkard. The house occupants run around doing "hooo-ah! We trained for this" poo poo for a minute and then they show stills of the damage the dumb bitch did when she shot wild in the dark.

I think in their eyes they won this encounter.

# ? May 20, 2015 11:19

Beef Turret: Jul 9, 2009; by Lowtax

Al Nipper posted:

don't come to battle, unless your prepared for WAR

Is there a part one to this

# ? May 20, 2015 11:21

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

concerned mom posted:

Can't you make like a sharpened piece of conch or something.

if I literally lived in the middle of the ocean my weapon would be a trident

# ? May 20, 2015 11:26

ZombieParts: Jul 18, 2009; ASK ME ABOUT VISITING PROSTITUTES IN CHINA AND FEELING NO SHAME. MY FRIEND IS SERIOUSLY THE (PATHETIC) YODA OF PAYING WOMEN TO TOUCH HIS (AND MY) DICK. THEY WOULDN'T DO IT OTHERWISE.

TacticalUrbanHomo posted:

if I literally lived in the middle of the ocean my weapon would be a trident

is there a cold steel trident?

# ? May 20, 2015 11:27

thathonkey: Jul 17, 2012

ZombieParts posted:

There's a break-in video that's been circulating around. Three dudes break into a house in the middle of the night. Some cats come and watch them. As they are leaving one of the occupants wakes up and runs in with a pistol. She takes a random shot in the darkness and manages to shoot a hole in a window. This wakes up the other occupant who wakes up dopey as loving hell. A revolver magically appears in his hand but he's still half a sleep so he uses the revolver to prop himself up while he tries to get oriented. He manages to get to his feet and stumbles down the stairs like a drunkard. The house occupants run around doing "hooo-ah! We trained for this" poo poo for a minute and then they show stills of the damage the dumb bitch did when she shot wild in the dark.

I think in their eyes they won this encounter.

Oh I thought for sure you were going to say one of the stray rounds killed a cat. What does the bolded part have to do with the rest of the story? Also youd think that even the most basic amount of gun training should lead you to NOT use a loaded weapon to "prop yourself up" even if you are half asleep. God drat people are stupid.

# ? May 20, 2015 11:29

Wild T: Dec 15, 2008; The point I'm trying to make is that the only way to come out on top is to kick the Air Force in the nuts, beart it savagely with a weight and take a dump on it's face.

thathonkey posted:

What does the bolded part have to do with the rest of the story?

It proves that cats are assholes who will calmly watch people rob you and not give a single gently caress.

thathonkey posted:

Also youd think that even the most basic amount of gun training should lead you to NOT use a loaded weapon to "prop yourself up" even if you are half asleep. God drat people are stupid.

That's adorable :allears:

# ? May 20, 2015 11:34

thathonkey: Jul 17, 2012

Wild T posted:

That's adorable

Yeah I know I know it still blows my mind though. Human stupidity truly knows no limits.

# ? May 20, 2015 11:39

Rutibex: Sep 9, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

i have 4 full sized swords (functional, not decorative), two bayonets (one is from nazi germany, the other is american from the Spanish-American war), and a large number of various combat knives

# ? May 20, 2015 11:45

Tashan Dorrsett: Apr 10, 2015; by Deplorable exmarx

Rutibex posted:

i have 4 full sized swords (functional, not decorative), two bayonets (one is from nazi germany, the other is american from the Spanish-American war), and a large number of various combat knives

# ? May 20, 2015 11:50

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

Rutibex posted:

i have 4 full sized swords (functional, not decorative), two bayonets (one is from nazi germany, the other is american from the Spanish-American war), and a large number of various combat knives

it is 2015 which means that there is no such thing as a (functional, not decorative) full sized sword unless you are part of an anti-Muslim pogrom in India, or an Arabian executioner

# ? May 20, 2015 11:57

Rutibex: Sep 9, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

TacticalUrbanHomo posted:

it is 2015 which means that there is no such thing as a (functional, not decorative) full sized sword unless you are part of an anti-Muslim pogrom in India, or an Arabian executioner

they are from the middle east, yes

# ? May 20, 2015 12:05

a bay: Oct 14, 2014; by Lowtax

Tashan Dorrsett posted:

i don't feel like getting banned for doxxing tfr goons again but it's pretty funny to google the usernames of tfr posters

# ? May 20, 2015 12:16

ZombieParts: Jul 18, 2009; ASK ME ABOUT VISITING PROSTITUTES IN CHINA AND FEELING NO SHAME. MY FRIEND IS SERIOUSLY THE (PATHETIC) YODA OF PAYING WOMEN TO TOUCH HIS (AND MY) DICK. THEY WOULDN'T DO IT OTHERWISE.

thathonkey posted:

Oh I thought for sure you were going to say one of the stray rounds killed a cat. What does the bolded part have to do with the rest of the story? Also youd think that even the most basic amount of gun training should lead you to NOT use a loaded weapon to "prop yourself up" even if you are half asleep. God drat people are stupid.

Yeah, Wild T beat me to it. Just talking about how cats are pretty useless in an invasion.

I'm all for people having guns, but in fact, that video was perfect proof about how they're not that useful. Those people even went to the trouble of installing some cameras but there were no motion sensing lights? My house lights up like a stadium if something goes near it. A high decibel alarm isn't a bad idea either. If I hit mine, I guarantee my whole neighborhood is going to wake up.

Yeah, the sleepy guy was on the bed, obviously loopy. His right hand was holding the pistol handle and he was pressing the barrel into the mattress holding himself up while he was trying to focus on the door and get his senses. It was an accident waiting to happen. Then there's a perfect shot of him stumbling on the stairs.

# ? May 20, 2015 12:46

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

Rutibex posted:

they are from the middle east, yes

I believe the swords are from the middle east but once someone who is not from the middle east buys them they stop being functional and become decorative

# ? May 20, 2015 12:51

Rutibex: Sep 9, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

TacticalUrbanHomo posted:

I believe the swords are from the middle east but once someone who is not from the middle east buys them they stop being functional and become decorative

thats fair, i haven't actually intimidated any muslims or decapitated anyone with them since i got them

# ? May 20, 2015 13:00

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

Rutibex posted:

thats fair, i haven't actually intimidated any muslims or decapitated anyone with them since i got them

here in the first world we intimidate muslims with guns, and sometimes with robots who have guns

# ? May 20, 2015 13:02

My Q-Face: Jul 8, 2002; A dumb racist who need to kill themselves

TacticalUrbanHomo posted:

That's really strange. Consider having someone watch you shoot it?

It's just a matter of practice. I've had orders of magnitude more practice with the M16/M4. Like thousands of rounds vs. less than 30 through the Remington.

# ? May 20, 2015 13:22

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

I have a bat cause I like to go to the batting cages and an ice ax somewhere in the basement that I haven't used in 5 years and probably should sell

# ? May 20, 2015 14:14

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

ArmZ posted:

I have a bat cause I like to go to the batting cages and an ice ax somewhere in the basement that I haven't used in 5 years and probably should sell

wtf is the point of an ice axe if you throw ice on a fire it will burn up in like half a second

# ? May 20, 2015 14:15

TacticalUrbanHomo: Aug 17, 2011; by Lowtax

oh wait I get it it's an axe made out of ice that makes more sense

# ? May 20, 2015 14:16

milkingmycow: Mar 28, 2008; by Cyrano4747

My 2 weapons.

# ? May 20, 2015 14:38

penus penus penus: Nov 9, 2014; by piss__donald

bought another 40 bullet clip today to protect my manga. i dont sleep with my ar 15 anymore ever since the.... event... but i keep the clips under my pillow and the rifle hangs overmy head on some rope.

edit: it has a pistol grip

# ? May 20, 2015 15:03

Jimbo Jaggins: Jul 19, 2013

lol if you don't holster your gun cavalry style

# ? May 20, 2015 15:06

Android Apocalypse: Apr 28, 2009; The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE; Illegal Hen

Ethiopian Yirgacheffe, whole bean. French press, electric kettle, mug.
I get poo poo set up, then ask intruders what's color of the boat house at Hereford.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1MkjmbdHUM

# ? May 20, 2015 15:12

Stocky Manhood: Jul 29, 2014; Can I get a hat wobble?

Tashan Dorrsett posted:

and i'm arguing that obsessive level gun ownership often stems from a lack of security in one's masculinity so it's kind of relevant.

Ever thought that maybe recreational target shooting is fun? Maybe a family tradition for some families?

The real issue is improper storage by idiots that never even use their firearms.

# ? May 20, 2015 17:27

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

psyopmonkey posted:

Oh, and another thing.

Stop pointing your finger out all stiff above the trigger. Thats so dumb.

It makes you look like a retard.

Youre not on an f'ing battlefield, just grab on to the handle like a normal person.

Trigger discipline is good and rad, but dont look like some kinda douchetard when youre doing it.

I do this when paintballing and it works really well to help me control the marker. Especially if I'm sprinting at a piece of cover.

# ? May 20, 2015 17:41

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

Superdude255 posted:

Ever thought that maybe recreational target shooting is fun? Maybe a family tradition for some families?

The real issue is improper storage by idiots that never even use their firearms.

its not fun though

# ? May 20, 2015 17:44