Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

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Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Chug chug chug chug chug! (the half-strength potion.)

Potion rolls: 2, 3, 5, 3, 2, 4, total 19 LIFE POINTS. We're up to 33.

Now for the full-strength one: 5 + 4 = 9, we're at 42. I think that's good enough for now.

Now let's head to 135. That's eight steps, two wandering monster rolls.

Wandering Monster roll 1: 3 + 3 = 6, no one.
Wandering Monster roll 2: 1 + 4 = 5, still no one. The dice have been kind to us in this level so far. (Watch us get swamped by monsters next time we're in the corridors.)

Section 135 posted:

This looks like a very ordinary ante-chamber, one door leading into the corridor, the other leading into 81. You could walk straight through if it wasn't for the Spif which has rooted itself in the centre of the floor, cracking up the stone slabbing and revealing the earth beneath.

You recognize it as a Spif instantly, of course, since there are pictures of these weird vegetables in several of Merlin's spell books. It has a single stem, very thin and pliable, and a bulbous head the size and shape of a melon (honeydew, not watermelon) and the colour of an aubergine.

Desperately you try to remember what you read about Spifs in Merlin's spell books. There's something magical about them, of course, otherwise they wouldn't be written about. But what?

Eventually it comes to you. The seeds! Inside the head are anything up to six seeds and each one you swallow restores your LIFE POINTS to their absolute maximum. The most powerful healing known. What's more, if you eat six Spif seeds, you automatically gain one PERMANENT LIFE POINT.

The only problem is, Spifs don't like having their heads cut off for the sake of the seeds and will begin to vibrate if you're not very, very careful. A vibrating Spif will turn the molecules of your body into brackish water in exactly eight seconds, Pip.

The thing is, are you willing to risk cutting off the Spifs head for the sake of the seeds?

If so, turn to 165.

If not, you can safely return to the corridor or progress to 81.

To keep the LP moving, I'll let you guys vote about what to do with the Spif once we've visited Section 81, since we can come back to 135 from there if we want. 165 gives the instructions on what to roll, but I won't be showing you that just yet since there's no choice to go back from there, it's do or die if we try.

Section 81 posted:

This vast chamber with its high ceiling has, would you believe, a second long thin room actually built in the middle of its floor. (The Mad Architect strikes again!) There are two doors into this thin room, one at the western end, one at the east. Each is guarded by a smallish Winzing, a squat stubby-winged creature with leathery skin and a sword that's not much longer than a dagger.

The Winzings will not attack unless you try to enter 117. If, however, you do and get into a hassle, it's as well to know the Winzing you'll be fighting has 15 LIFE POINTS, hits on 7 and does +1 damage with that little sword. You don't HAVE to go to 117, of course, but there's nothing else in 81, so your only other option is to return to 135.

...And from there all the way down the corridor, eventually reaching 87. So we have two questions to decide upon:

1. Do we chop the Spif's head off to get at the seeds?
2. Do we fight the Winzing to get into 117?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 42/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 26
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x33 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), ~~Half-strength Healing Potion x6 (heals one dice roll worth of LIFE POINTS)~~ , bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Jul 28, 2015 20:37

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# ? May 28, 2024 05:04

Ghostwoods: May 9, 2013; Say "Cheese!"

Leave the plant. We do have 33 healing potions, after all.
Enter the room.

# ? Jul 28, 2015 21:08

Jazzimus Prime: May 16, 2002; The Brothers Autobot

Ghostwoods posted:

Leave the plant. We do have 33 healing potions, after all.
Enter the room.

Seconded. A permanent life point would be nice, but it's not worth risking a bullshit dice roll over, and losing that magic coin in the process.

# ? Jul 28, 2015 21:20

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Enthirdened. Do what Ghostwoods says.

# ? Jul 29, 2015 07:27

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

You guys are no fun :colbert:

At this point the Winzing is nothing more than a pesky bug to be swatted away, but for comedy's sake let's see how it does against us.

Pip's initiative roll: 1 + 4 = 5
Winzing's initiative roll: 4 + 5 = 9

Winzing attacks! 1 + 2 = 3, missed.
Pip attacks! 2 + 6 = 8, Winzing is hit for 4 + 5 + 5 = 14 LIFE POINTS, is down to 1 and slumps to the ground out cold.

What's behind the door to 117?

Section 117 posted:

You have entered a 10' x 10' chamber and the door behind you turns out to be one-way, so you can't use it to get back out. What's more, you have fallen down a pit. It's not difficult to climb out again, even if you don't have a rope, but you lose one die roll of LIFE POINTS.

The door north is also one-way and leads back to 81, but you cannot use it to enter the room again.
The door ahead leads to 94.

Life loss: 2 (40 LIFE POINTS left).

Let's assume you don't want to backtrack and go onwards to 94.

Section 94 posted:

You have entered a 10 x 10' chamber and the door behind you turns out to be one-way, so you can't use it to get back out. What's more, you have fallen down a pit. It's not difficult to climb out again, even if you don't have a rope, but you lose one die roll of LIFE POINTS .

The door north is also one-way and leads back to 81, but you cannot use it to enter the room again.
The door ahead leads to 122.

Life loss: 6 (34 LIFE POINTS left).

That's right, it's another bullshit thing like the "maze" we've encountered earlier! Isn't this fun?

This one is more straightforward than the previous one: every room is the same, has a one-way door leading in, another leading to the next room, and a third leading out to 81. So it basically boils down to "You've fallen down a pit and lost one die of health, do you want to keep going? (Y/N)" until we reach the "reward" room.

So, do you want to keep going until the reward room or should we just get out of here and make our way down the corridor to 87?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 34/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 27
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x33 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Jul 29, 2015 20:05

Jazzimus Prime: May 16, 2002; The Brothers Autobot

Let's continue. There's probably a reward of some kind at the end of this, and if not, we have plenty of healing potions.

# ? Jul 29, 2015 20:06

Added Space: Jul 13, 2012; Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!

I say Keep Going until we get a reward or the rooms start looping.

# ? Jul 29, 2015 20:50

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Press onwards. Gulp down healing potions as necessary.

# ? Jul 30, 2015 07:08

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

Keep going, it's got to be worth it...right?

# ? Jul 30, 2015 11:39

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

The door leads to 122. Have we reached the final room?

Section 122 posted:

You have entered a 10 x 10' chamber and the door behind you turns out to be one-way, so you can't use it to get back out. What's more, you have fallen down a pit. It's not difficult to climb out again, even if you don't have a rope, but you lose one die roll of LIFE POINTS .

The door north is also one-way and leads back to 81, but you cannot use it to enter the room again.
The door ahead leads to 131.

Nope. We lose (roll) 4 LIFE POINTS and we're at 30.

Section 131 posted:

You have entered a 10 x 10' chamber and the door behind you turns out to be one-way, so you can't use it to get back out. What's more, you have fallen down a pit. It's not difficult to climb out again, even if you don't have a rope, but you lose one die roll of LIFE POINTS .

The door north is also one-way and leads back to 81, but you cannot use it to enter the room again.
The door ahead leads to 99.

Not 131 either. The roll says 4 once more, so we're at 26.

Section 99 posted:

You have entered a 10 x 10' chamber and the door behind you turns out to be one-way, so you can't use it to get back out. What's more, you have fallen down a pit. It's not difficult to climb out again, even if you don't have a rope, but you lose one die roll of LIFE POINTS .

The door north is also one-way and leads back to 81, but you cannot use it to enter the room again.
The door ahead leads to 119.

Another chamber, another 2 LIFE POINTS lost.

Section 119 posted:

That's odd: you haven't fallen down a pit.

But you have been teleported to 87, which may be just as bad. Or may not.

At least it has enough humour to point out the succession of pitfalls.

:siren:

You may remember 87 as "that one room way down the corridor", as seen in the map :siren:

The succession of pitfalls is nothing more than a shortcut to get there. And also kind of a dick move, because if you haven't explored every room before trying the sequence you have to make your way back down the corridor if you want to search them.

But what's in 87?

Section 87 posted:

How interesting. There are stairs in this room, Pip, leading down into the dark depths of 150. There are also three doors, one leading south into a corridor, one north to 113 and one east to 102.

Nothing much. If we so choose, we're all done with this level, since we can go down the stairs and explore the next one. On the other hand, there's three rooms we haven't explored yet. Where do we go now?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 24/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 27
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x33 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Jul 30, 2015 19:29

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Glug a couple of healing potions and head North to 113.

# ? Jul 30, 2015 21:37

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

We still have plenty of healing potions, let's chug some of them.

Potion roll: 2 + 4 = 6, we're at 30 LIFE POINTS.
Potion roll: 5 + 3 = 8, 38.
Potion roll: 4 + 3 = 7, 45. We're topped up.

Section 113 *(Special) posted:

What a vast room. 50' x 60' if it's an inch. Pity it's empty.

Or is it? There's just the slightest hint of a shimmer up by the northern wall. By the time you reach it, there's nothing there at all, but being a curious sort of soul, you reach out and feel where the shimmer was.

Hate to tell you this, but you are feeling the outline of a tall, thin man with a pointed head. (Or possibly a pointed hat: it's difficult to tell since he's invisible.)

'Get your grubby little hands off me!' a remarkably unpleasant voice hisses out of nowhere. Remarkably unpleasant and oddly familiar. If you hadn't killed him on your very first adventure (those were the days, eh?) you could swear it was the voice of the Wicked Wizard Ansalom.

You leap back and draw your faithful sword. 'Show yourself, sir!' you challenge brusquely. 'Otherwise I shall be forced to slit your gizzard!'

But all you get in answer is a sneering laugh as a fireball materializes out of nowhere and whizzes past your ear.

This could have been really bad.

Section 113 *(Special) posted:

This may not be the late Wizard Ansalom, but it's certainly an invisible wizard of some sort. And angry too.

The only way to avoid a fight with the Wizard is to offer him a bribe. But he will only accept a magical item. If you don't have any you're prepared to give away, then you're into a combat situation.

The Invisible Wizard has 40 LIFE POINTS. He will not use weapons, but knows every spell in PIP'S FIRST SPELL BOOK and will certainly use them until his LIFE POINTS run out. He does not, however, have anymore Fireballs and his Lightning Bolts are of a very poor quality which do only +2 damage.

Should the Wizard kill you, go to 14. Should you kill the Wizard, go to 142.

I'm going to assume there's a mistake here and they meant "2 damage", since we don't roll for damage when we use Lightning Bolts but do 10 straight damage.

Anyway, we can avoid fighting him, since we have three items we can give him. Well, two, in fact, since I doubt we're prepared to lose EJ, so we can offer either the Magic Coin or the Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection.

Should we try to bribe this guy, or is it stabbin' time?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 27
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x33 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 2, 2015 13:13

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

Stab Stab Stab

# ? Aug 2, 2015 13:55

Ghostwoods: May 9, 2013; Say "Cheese!"

Comstar posted:

Stab Stab Stab

# ? Aug 2, 2015 14:11

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

I'll do my best to roleplay the invisible wizard, by which I mean I'll do my best to murder Pip :getin:

Pip's initiative roll: 4 + 5 = 9.
Invisible Wizard's initiative roll: 2 + 5 = 7.

Pip attacks! 4 + 5 = 9, Invisible Wizard is hit for 5 + 5 + 5 = 15 LIFE POINTS and is down to 25.
Invisible Wizard casts PILL! 3 + 3 = 6, a fizzle, Invisible Wizard is down to 22 LIFE POINTS.
Pip attacks! 3 + 5 = 8, Invisible Wizard is hit for 4 + 5 + 5 = 14 LIFE POINTS and is down to 8.
Invisible Wizard casts PILL! 4 + 4 = 8, Invisible Wizard is down to 5 LIFE POINTS but Pip doubles over with laughter, missing the next three turns.
Pip misses his turn! (1)
Invisible Wizard casts Lightning Bolt! Pip is down to 43 LIFE POINTS.
Pip misses his turn! (2)
Invisible Wizard casts Lightning Bolt! Pip is down to 41 LIFE POINTS.
Pip misses his turn! (3)
Invisible Wizard casts Lightning Bolt! Pip is down to 39 LIFE POINTS.
Pip attacks! 5 + 2 = 7, Invisible Wizard is hit for 3 + 5 + 5 = 13 LIFE POINTS and is killed.

This was... Uneventful. We were lucky his first spell fizzled and then he couldn't use any other spells in the spellbook, since that would have brought him below five LIFE POINTS and caused him to faint. Oh well.

Section 142 posted:

As you deliver the death-blow, the Invisible Wizard slowly grows visible again. And would you believe, he really is the spitting image of the Wicked Wizard Ansalom. But he couldn't have been, could he? Not when you killed Ansalom ages ago.

Wait, how does this work? I'm confused. Does this mean that the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead is literally the afterlife, i.e. where people go when they've died, instead of being just a name like Monster Island?

Section 142 posted:

As a hardened scavenger, you diligently search the pockets of his robe. He is carrying a chewed piece of bubble gum, a pen-knife, a piece of string, a wax doll, a shrunken head and a spell book just like yours.

You start to throw away this rubbish when a thought strikes you and you flick through the Spell Book. Much as you thought - it has only the spells you already know.

You start to throw away the Spell Book when another thought strikes you and you carefully examine the inside back cover. Something is written there in faded pencil. Although the light is bad, you finally manage to read it:

RESURRECTION

Resurrection? Resurrection! You've found a Resurrection Spell! This is the most valuable Spell you could possibly have. It's the only spell you can cast when you're dead. It's a bit tricky since you need to roll a 10, 11 or 12 on two dice to make it work. But if it does work, you are completely resurrected with all your original LIFE POINTS and can go on fighting whatever monster killed you, or whatever else you were doing when you got yourself killed. What a spell! The only trouble is it uses up so much magic that you will not be able to use any of your other spells in the next three sections you visit, or until you SLEEP, whichever is the sooner.

All the same, that spell could mean the difference between life and death for you, Pip, so rejoice a little.

That's enough rejoicing. You can now leave by either of the southern doors. One leads to 102, the other to 87.

Nice reward. It doesn't specify how many LIFE POINTS we get when we come back to life, but I'm going to assume the maximum amount (minus three because of the spellcasting) since otherwise it would be pointless.

The only place we haven't visited yet is 102, so let's go there now.

Section 102 posted:

Well, at least there are two doors out of this 30' x 20' chamber. (Three, counting the one you came in.) But that's the only good news. The bad news is that the chamber is full of Minches.

The trouble with Minches is that they don't look particularly dangerous. They never grow more than a few inches long and they're furry, fat and cuddly. They're also very friendly. Very friendly. And very stupid. A Minch genius would have an IQ of 1 if it could only count that far.

It's a well-known fact (among adventurers at any rate) that your average Minch will try to snuggle up to anything that comes near it - another Minch, a human being, a Tyrannosaurus Rex ... anything. Which possibly explains why Minches are so rare.

Being snuggled by a Minch is a very pleasant experience. But being snuggled by several thousand Minches all at the same time is usually lethal, since they suffocate you.

There are several thousand Minches in this chamber. They are all snuggled up together in the middle of the room. They are turning their friendly eyes towards you and smiling their friendly smiles and wiggling their friendly bodies with delight. They are beginning to move in your direction, Pip.

The doors from this room lead to 113, 126 and 87. You can go back to the section you were last in without any problem, (fust remember to slam the door.) If you decide to head for a different section then you must make one die roll for every 10'. square you have to cross to find out if you're fast enough to avoid suffocation by the Minches. Score 1 to 4 and you'll make it safely. Score 5 or 6 and you'd better go to 14 to get your breath back.

Here's the map:

Since we're coming from 113, we have to roll twice to make it through the room and get to 126 if we so choose. Of course, after exploring 126 we'll need to come back and roll again to get back to 87, since that's where the stairs down are.

Or we could just ignore the Minches and 126 entirely, go back to 87 (through 113 so we don't have to deal with the Minches) and down the stairs.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 28
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

Mikl fucked around with this message at 15:52 on Aug 2, 2015

# ? Aug 2, 2015 14:41

Carbon dioxide: Oct 9, 2012

quote:

But if it does work, you are completely resurrected with all your original LIFE POINTS

quote:

Nice reward. It doesn't specify how many LIFE POINTS we get when we come back to life

???

Anyway, I want the treasure in 126

# ? Aug 2, 2015 14:59

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Carbon dioxide posted:

???

Anyway, I want the treasure in 126

You saw nothing. Even if you did, it wasn't me completely misreading the spell's description :sweatdrop:

VVV Yes, we should (and are) on 30 Health potions. Forgot to deduct the three we used from our total.

Mikl fucked around with this message at 15:52 on Aug 2, 2015

# ? Aug 2, 2015 15:20

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

I really want to know what's so great in 126, but I don't like those odds and that magic coin is too amazing to lose. Go back the way we came.

Hell, it'll probably only turn out to be a bunch of pit traps in 126 anyway.

(Also - should we be on 30 healing potions now? And why do I end up always posting about healing potions?)

# ? Aug 2, 2015 15:28

idonotlikepeas: May 29, 2010; This reasoning is possible for forums user idonotlikepeas!

Let's just go down the stairs. We've got enough things at this point that dying due to random dice rolls would be somewhat upsetting and I wouldn't want to bank on that resurrection spell.

I mean, I'm sure this will result in us dying anyway due to not having a required item that's in one of the rooms on this floor, but let's cheat 14 as long as we can.

# ? Aug 2, 2015 15:40

Ghostwoods: May 9, 2013; Say "Cheese!"

That's ridiculous odds. Go down the stairs.

# ? Aug 2, 2015 19:07

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

87 notes that "downstairs" is actually "section 150", so let's go there.

Section 150 posted:

This isn't really a room at all. The stairs leave off in a twisty little bit of corridor with, fortunately, a full plan of Level III drawn facing you on a massive blackboard.

Since you can't very well carry a blackboard around with you for the rest of the adventure, you carefully copy down the plan (wondering who drew it there) and note that you are actually in a spiral corridor that goes on for quite a long way.

This is rather a pity since you will find that in the corridors of this level you must make a Wandering Monster roll every 40 feet (4 squares) and not every 50 as on the level above. Results should be read from the Level 3 Wandering Monster table, in the Appendix.

Now put your best foot forward, turn to the Level III map and good luck.

New level! And here's the map:

I'll be kind and tell you that this is actually the deepest level, so if you want to use the Amulet of Wandering Monster protection, now would be a good time.

Also note that from where we are we can get everywhere on this level just by following the corridors, excepting 200 which doesn't seem to have a door leading into it. Weird.

Anyway, where do we go now?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 28
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, two charges) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 2, 2015 19:48

idonotlikepeas: May 29, 2010; This reasoning is possible for forums user idonotlikepeas!

Let's use that amulet and head for 147, since it looks like we can only get there from here anyway.

Incidentally:

Mikl posted:

Wait, how does this work? I'm confused. Does this mean that the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead is literally the afterlife, i.e. where people go when they've died, instead of being just a name like Monster Island?

Probably Ansalom cast the resurrection spell we got out of his spellbook on himself and was laying low until we reslaughtered him. Let's hope he doesn't roll well this time.

# ? Aug 2, 2015 20:08

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Amulet useage and 147.

# ? Aug 2, 2015 20:48

Ghostwoods: May 9, 2013; Say "Cheese!"

Russ L posted:

Amulet useage and 147.

Yarp.

# ? Aug 2, 2015 21:40

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Since we've used the Amulet, we can get to 147 without worrying about wandering monsters.

Section 147 posted:

At 20' x 50' this is a pretty big room for a rubbish tip. Everything seems to have been thrown in here . . . tables, chairs, old pots and pans, lamps, clocks, urns, candlesticks, geroflas, crocks, old boo-

Geroflas?

There's nothing worse than meeting a Gerofla when all you want is a bit of peace. These six feet long, two-headed reptiles have a meaner disposition than Emperor Ming of Mongo. This particular Gerofla, lurking in the junk, has 40 LIFE POINTS, strikes on a 6 or better and gets two hits for your one on account of its second head. Fortunately both heads score only dice damage with no pluses.

If you survive this encounter, go to 152. If not, lick your wounds (a filthy habit) in 14.

When I was young I didn't get the reference at all.

Pip's initiative roll: 4 + 1 = 5.
Gerofla's initiative roll: 5 + 6 = 11.

Gerofla attacks! 3 + 4 = 7, Pip is hit for 1 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Gerofla attacks! 5 + 1 = 6, Pip is hit for 0 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Pip attacks! 6 + 2 = 8, Gerofla is hit for 4 + 5 + 5 = 14 LIFE POINTS and is down to 26.
Gerofla attacks! 3 + 6 = 9, Pip is hit for 3 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Gerofla attacks! 2 + 6 = 8, Pip is hit for 2 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Pip attacks! 3 + 2 = 5, Gerofla is hit for 1 + 5 + 5 = 11 LIFE POINTS and is down to 15.
Gerofla attacks! 6 + 1 = 7, Pip is hit for 1 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Gerofla attacks! 5 + 4 = 9, Pip is hit for 3 - 4 = NO LIFE POINTS.
Pip attacks! 4 + 1 = 5, Gerofla is hit for 1 + 5 + 5 = 11 LIFE POINTS, is down to 4 and falls unconcious.

That wasn't so hard, wasn't it? (The fact that the Geroflas had to roll at least a ten to do any damage probably helped.)

Section 152 posted:

Nice bit of survival that. Geroflas are monsters to be reckoned with. What a sturdy young adventurer you turned out to be. What a sterling slaughterer of monsters. What an intrepid seeker after loot and booty. What a -

Enough of this flattery. You might as well rummage in this junk heap now you've got rid of the Gerofla. That brass lamp looks interesting, for instance. A bit battered and very old, but interesting.

Now you've found the interesting lamp, what do you do with it?

If you rub it, go to 177.

If you try to open it up, go to 186.

If you try to light it, go to 199.

(Also, take a look at the map and say where you want to go when we're done with this thing.)

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 10/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 28
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge ) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 2, 2015 22:01

Alumnus Post: Dec 29, 2009; They are weird and troubling. We owe it to our neighbors to kill them.; Pillbug

That's a fine-looking lamp. Let's light it up!

# ? Aug 2, 2015 23:50

inflatablefish: Oct 24, 2010

Always rub lamps. Sure, the genie will kill us, but it'd probably do that anyway.

# ? Aug 3, 2015 00:20

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Rub the lamp. Cower before the inevitable 200 life point djinn.

After we're finished in this room, head on into 167.

Mikl posted:

When I was young I didn't get the reference at all.

Someone's going to have to help me out with this one, because all I can think of for 'Gerofla' is the opera.

# ? Aug 3, 2015 07:01

nweismuller: Oct 11, 2012; They say that he who dies with the most Opil wins.

I am winning.

Russ L posted:

Someone's going to have to help me out with this one, because all I can think of for 'Gerofla' is the opera.

'Emperor Ming of Mongo' is 'Ming the Merciless', the primary villain of Flash Gordon.

# ? Aug 3, 2015 08:11

Junpei Hyde: Mar 15, 2013

Always be rubbin' lamps.

# ? Aug 3, 2015 08:21

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

nweismuller posted:

'Emperor Ming of Mongo' is 'Ming the Merciless', the primary villain of Flash Gordon.

Yep, this was the reference I didn't get. Flash Gordon wasn't really a thing in Italy when I was growing up.

Rubbing the lamp does...

Section 177 posted:

Your name's Pip, not Aladdin. Go Back to 152 and stop messing about.

...absolutely nothing, except having the book be a smartass. The only other vote besides rubbing was Alumnus Post's lighting, so let's try that.

Section 199 posted:

The lamp burns with a surprisingly steady blue flame and a hint of pale blue-grey smoke which curls around you like a shroud. Except it isn't a shroud, as you quickly discover - it's a magical protection! If this lamp is lit before you get into a hassle, the magic smoke will deduct three points from any damage scored against you. And that's on top of any damage deductions you may already have.

The only thing is, you must decide to light the lamp before you enter a section or make a Wandering Monster roll, since you won't have time when the hassle actually starts. There is enough oil in there for six uses, but don't throw the lamp away afterwards, since you may find suitable oil somewhere - perhaps on some other adventure.

Now pack your lamp away carefully and leave via the door south into the corridor or the door east into 167.

Nice find. Incidentally, if we'd opened the lamp, Section 186 would have told us "There's oil with a strange scent in here, otherwise it's a completely ordinary lamp. Want to light it? Go to 199, otherwise choose whether to keep it or leave it and go check out another section."

Now let's see what 167 has in store for us.

Section 167 posted:

A whirlwind envelopes you the second you step through this doorway, blacking you out momentarily and teleporting you straight back to 74, which is right at the beginning of Level II!

Wouldn't that make you spit !

This book

In Section 74 we're safe from immediate danger, but if we want to get back to level III we have to make our way alllllllllll the way through level II and take the stairs down (see map); this means rolling lots of times for Wandering Monsters, unless we use the last charge in the Amulet. Also, since it wasn't specified whether the Amulet's effect is permanent (i.e.: if it still works when we leave a level and go back to it) when we found it, I'm ruling that it is because that's quite enough bullshit out of you, book, thank you :colbert:

so when we get back to level III we won't have to roll for Wandering Monsters.

Now decide whether to use the Amulet now to get through level II, and then take a look at level III's map and decide where to go next (we enter from 150, as a reminder).

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 9/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 29
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow), Magic Lamp (+3 defense, must be used before an encounter, enough oil for six uses)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 3, 2015 18:43

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

We may as well use the other charge, and then head to 160 when we get back (I'm just thinking of starting in the top left and working through them all systematically).

nweismuller posted:

'Emperor Ming of Mongo' is 'Ming the Merciless', the primary villain of Flash Gordon.

Ah right, I misunderstood (I got that one but thought that 'Gerofla' was the reference in question).

Thanks, though.

# ? Aug 3, 2015 19:17

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Charge used up, the Amulet is now completely inert. I'm going to keep it around since we don't need to make space for anything just yet, just tell me if you want to toss it.

Since we "solved" the maze at 129, the only room we must pass through to get to level III, we have no trouble at all here on level II. On to 160.

Section 160 posted:

A whirlwind envelopes you the second you step through this doorway, blackening you out momentarily and teleporting you straight to 147.

Isn't that irritating?

It sure is! 147 is the room where we fought the Gerofla, so we have nothing to do here.

I guess by now you're starting to understand this level's gimmick: several rooms aren't rooms at all, but rather teleporting traps which send you all over the dungeon. I have to say that personally I'm really not a fun of this gimmick, or this dungeon in general to be fair; besides level I, which was actually fun, level II and level III are full of unfun gimmicks, which seem to be present only to artificially increase the book's length. Ah well, can't win everytime I guess.

For the purpose of sparing you guys an unfun game of whack-a-teleporter, I'm going to tell you right away that Sections 153, 176, 181, 184, 193 and 196 are teleporters (besides 160 and 167, which we've already visited), so you can avoid those without missing anything at all. That said...

Where to now, goons?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 9/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 29
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow), Magic Lamp (+3 defense, must be used before an encounter, enough oil for six uses)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

Mikl fucked around with this message at 18:10 on Aug 4, 2015

# ? Aug 4, 2015 18:07

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

148 then, please.

# ? Aug 4, 2015 18:42

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 148 posted:

Hold your breath, Pip! This whole room is full of poison gas! Your eagle eyes have spotted a fully operative coal-driven, steam-powered Mark I Poison Gas Generator (Patent Pending) chugging away in the middle of the room.

Roll two dice to see if you were fast enough. Score 2 to 8 and you weren't: off you go to 14. Score 9 to 12 and you can stagger back into the corridor, coughing and choking, for the loss of only one LIFE POINT.

Hey look, it's our old pal the save-or-die room! It's been a while.

Roll: 6 + 3 = 9, just barely made it. (Even if we hadn't, we have six doses of poison antidote, so we could have used one of those.)

This room's a bust. Where should we go next?

_{Visited: 147, 148, 160, 167.

Teleporter trap: 153, 176, 181, 184, 193, 196.}

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 9/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 29
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow), Magic Lamp (+3 defense, must be used before an encounter, enough oil for six uses)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 9, 2015 10:41

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Dang. Insta-death on a roll of 2-8, i.e mortal over 72% of the time? That is some serious bullshucks.

Anyway, 170 please. No doubt there'll be some sort of chess-based puzzle.

# ? Aug 9, 2015 11:00

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 170 posted:

If you've studied your map, it will come as no surprise to you to learn the floor of this chamber is laid out in alternating black and white flagstones, like a chessboard. (A very small chessboard, admittedly, since it only has four squares to a side, but still....)

And if you have any sense at all (which you have, since you've survived this far) you would be inclined to think the layout means something. Probably something nasty. Like stepping on the black squares kills you. Or stepping on the white squares turns your brains to mould.

So which squares do you step on? Maybe the scrap of parchment pinned to the ceiling would help. You can just about fish it down with EJ without stepping on either coloured squares.

The parchment has just one word scrawled across it: 'Aaaaaahhhhhh!' Which is apparently the death rattle of some poor adventurer who stepped on the wrong colour. You are just about to throw it away in disgust, when you notice something written on the back:

'Avoid that which begins with the second. Use that which begins with the twenty-third. It's a long lane that has no turning and a nod is as good as a wink to a blind horse.'

Some idiots get very garrulous when they're dying. But the message may contain some clue if you can figure it out.

Take your time, then make your decision.
Step on the black squares and go to 163.
Stepping on the white takes you to 195.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 9/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 29
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow), Magic Lamp (+3 defense, must be used before an encounter, enough oil for six uses)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 9, 2015 18:39

Added Space: Jul 13, 2012; Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!

The second is B and the twenty-third is W, so White

# ? Aug 9, 2015 18:45

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Correct answer! (I have no idea what that "long lane" stuff is about.)

Section 195 posted:

That seems safe enough. Furthermore, there 's a healing potion worth a die roll of LIFE POINTS on one of the safe squares. Take it with you when you leave by either the western or the southern door.

And we get another half-strength healing potion for our trouble (man, they're just tossing them out like candy, aren't they?). Unfortunately we can't pick that up without tossing anything away, so I'll leave it here for now.

Since we're here, we might as well cross the room, go down the corridor and see what 164 is about, so we're done with this part of the map.

Section 164 posted:

As you may have noticed from your map, there is a darkness zone in this chamber. It starts 50 feet away from the door you've just entered and it looks like trouble.

It also looks like it might be hiding a door into 200. Torches, lamps, even light spells won't dispel this darkness, but if you want to fumble your way in, you should go to 155. If not, your only other option is to go back out the door you came in.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LIFE POINTS: 45/44+1
SPEED: 9/18
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 30
INVENTORY:
E.J. (hits on a 4 or higher, +5 damage, +10 damage against dragons), dragonskin jacket (-4 damage), Healing Potion x30 (heals two dice rolls' worth of LIFE POINTS), bookworm x1, blue powder x1, container of oil x1, Talisman of Wandering Monster Protection (zero encounter rate for the level we use it, one charge) x1, torch x1, pair of old boots x1, Poison Antidote x6, key to the Gateway of the Ghastly Kingdom of the Dead x1, Scruffy Old Sir's Patent Weed-Killer x3 (double damage for one hit versus plant enemies), Magic Collapsible Shield (weightless, stops every third blow), Magic Lamp (+3 defense, must be used before an encounter, enough oil for six uses)
MAGIC:
Pip's First Spellbook and Pip's Second Spellbook (costs 3 LIFE POINTS per spell, maximum 3 uses per spell, need roll 7 or higher on two dice or spell doesn't work, used: PIP x3, PIL x2), Lightning Bolt x9 (10 damage, automatic hit), Fireball x1 (75 damage, hits on a 6 or higher), Resurrection (need roll 10 or above, can only be cast after death, seals magic for three sections or until sleep)
MONEY AND VALUABLES:
938 Gold Pieces
STATUS EFFECTS:
Magic coin: +5 damage in battle

Roll of the dead posted:

Death the first: (poisonous) smoke inhalation

# ? Aug 9, 2015 19:00

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# ? May 28, 2024 05:04

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Something tells me that room 200 will contain the endgame, and I'd like to explore some more of the level.

I vote for going back the way we came, and heading over to check out 173.

# ? Aug 9, 2015 20:27

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

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