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Neruz posted:I'm pretty sure this is just to spite all the hooligan the Ork players who keep ruining their preciously crafted narrative.
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Sep 9, 2015 09:10
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Sylphosaurus posted:So, it's the standard "gently caress you for daring to have fun in our narrative" from GW then? Pretty much. Every time GW try to do a big story campaign they put Orks on the side of Chaos and the Ork players always hate this and instead do everything in their power to make sure Chaos fails, while also trashing everyone else they can of course. As a result GW's carefully crafted "Chaos is awesomely unstoppable and everyone has a cool final stand" story-line gets shot all to poo poo two steps from the start by a hooligan Ork drive-by. At which point GW respond by writing that the Orks got bored and left because they wrote themselves into a corner by assuming Chaos would just magically win and Ork players would do what they were told to do. Note that this rule applies to both Fantasy and 40k; Ork\Orc players refuse to be good little pawns of Chaos and it drives GW nuts 
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Sep 9, 2015 09:14
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Neruz posted:Pretty much. This is fantasy, but their player-driven "end of the world" storm of chaos campaign was hilarious, because the good side launched such an inspiring defense that Chaos got literally nowhere until the person running it was forced to just ignore battle results and keep moving them forward no matter what happened. Meanwhile, on the other side of the map, the orks pretty much did the fighting equivalent of doing donuts with your car, around and around in circles before deciding to go ahead and win the war. With the result of the bad guy getting punked in a nowhere town by the Orc's warboss.
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Sep 9, 2015 09:36
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Neruz posted:Pretty much. Orkz iz made fer fitin and winnin. And dey aint gonna let no wussy Chaos boyz or any ovva gitz tell dem what winnin iz. Dem Chaos boyz av 4 diffr'nt godz. and dey all fites emselvez and git inta all sorts o poncey nonsense. Orkz az 2. And dey are for two fings. Brutal cunnin' and cunnin' Brutality. Koz for da rest, Orkz dun need Gods. Koz we gotz ORKZ. Veloxyll fucked around with this message at 09:41 on Sep 9, 2015 |
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Sep 9, 2015 09:37
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In all fairness the Tyranids are kind of boned. In the same way you're boned if you start choking on a chicken bone. Basically the Tyranids need sustenance, unfortunately the big all you can eat buffet sign the hive mind spotted was the loving Emperor and so now they're coming towards this poo poo-hole of a galaxy where even the most basic food is likely to eat up massive amounts of time just to devour. Even worse is either they're running from another race, Orks/Gas Beings/Old Ones or they're running from starvation because they've eaten everything else. One of the 5th edition codex quotes even suggests that the Tyranids are a sort of punishment/clean up crew made by the last of the Old Ones to reset the entire galaxy so they can come back and rebuild their empire. In general the Tyranids are generic doomsday villains as all hell but in return they are so different from basically everything else in Warhammer 40k and that's what makes them neat considering nothing thinks like the Tyranids think. They're the ultimate outside context problem, no race within the Galaxy, bar maybe the Eldar and even they didn't get visions pertaining to the Tyranids until after the first Tyrannic war from memory, could have seen them coming and because they think and act in ways so alien in nature from everything else they are exceptionally dangerous as far as generic doomsday villains go. Also unlike every other race they have no concept of honour so when the Avatar of Khaine challenged the Swarmlord to single combat he accepted and then ganked him with 9 god-drat Carnifexes. I would like to point out that GW only does Orks working for chaos in Fantasy Battle where in all fairness the Orks actually are a chaos race from memory. In Warhammer 40k they tend to actually let the Orks do what they want in the theory that Orks will attack everyone for a good laugh. Chaos being super special unstoppable is also more of a Fantasy Battle thing from memory, which considering the daemons in fantasy battle are supposedly equal strength to those in 40k also kind of makes sense from a lore standpoint. In 40k Tyranids tend to be the super special unstoppable race and chaos are the Imperium of Man's personal loving demons made manifest more often than not.
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Sep 9, 2015 09:38
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Lord_Magmar posted:I would like to point out that GW only does Orks working for chaos in Fantasy Battle where in all fairness the Orks actually are a chaos race from memory Nah - Orcs weren't Chaos in Fantasy Battle. They were pretty much the same as 40k Orks but lower tech and with a C not a K - opposed to the orderly humanish factions but not actually on the side of big C Chaos. Also they used goblins as ammunition.
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Sep 9, 2015 10:31
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Archaeology Hat posted:Nah - Orcs weren't Chaos in Fantasy Battle. They were pretty much the same as 40k Orks but lower tech and with a C not a K - opposed to the orderly humanish factions but not actually on the side of big C Chaos.
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Sep 9, 2015 10:38
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anilEhilated posted:Fairly sure there's a 40K gun based around teleporting small Orkz inside the enemies for telefraggy fun. Shokk Attack Gun. Opens a warp portal between itself and the target location, in which the Orks toss in a snotling (basically a smaller, dumber goblin). The snotling then travels through the warp, completely unprotected, gets driven insane by demons, and comes out on the other end in the mood for some violence. There are obscenely complex rules for what happens next.
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Sep 9, 2015 11:15
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A red vapor cloud of death and awesomeness?
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Sep 9, 2015 11:21
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Lexicanum posted:The device itself is very complex and it is fairly common for it to fail in different and spectacular ways. The gun is known to misfire causing the tunnel to implode, killing anything in transit at the time. It can explode, leaving a crackling orb of unreality in its place. Or it can spin out of control, its operator failing to control it efficiently, making Snotlings explode in a spray of blood and gore, open a hole into the Warp itself, as a ravening cloud of sentient daemonic ichor gushes out into the material realm, or result in any kind of unnatural and destructive phenomena. Overall, it must be the most unpredictable waeapon ever created and it is rightfully feared by Ork enemies. I believe the Shokk Attack Gun is actually potentially one of the most powerful weapons in the game if you roll a double 6 which is, IIRC: 'A ravening cloud of sentient daemonic ichor gushes out into the material realm, any model hit is removed from play. Vehicles take an automatic hit. Do not save, do not pass go, do not collect $200.' Neruz fucked around with this message at 11:44 on Sep 9, 2015 |
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Sep 9, 2015 11:38
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Archaeology Hat posted:Nah - Orcs weren't Chaos in Fantasy Battle. They were pretty much the same as 40k Orks but lower tech and with a C not a K - opposed to the orderly humanish factions but not actually on the side of big C Chaos.
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Sep 9, 2015 11:51
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Neruz posted:I believe the Shokk Attack Gun is actually potentially one of the most powerful weapons in the game if you roll a double 6 which is, IIRC: 'A ravening cloud of sentient daemonic ichor gushes out into the material realm, any model hit is removed from play. Vehicles take an automatic hit. Do not save, do not pass go, do not collect $200.' IIRC they had to revamp the monolith rules specifically to ignore this because of the devastating effect it had on necron play.
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Sep 9, 2015 11:54
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Orcs are forces of chaos, but not forces of Chaos. It's easy to be confused if you're not paying attention. GW's writers should probably not have such difficulty with this
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Sep 9, 2015 11:55
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Neruz posted:I believe the Shokk Attack Gun is actually potentially one of the most powerful weapons in the game if you roll a double 6 which is, IIRC: 'A ravening cloud of sentient daemonic ichor gushes out into the material realm, any model hit is removed from play. Vehicles take an automatic hit. Do not save, do not pass go, do not collect $200.'
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Sep 9, 2015 11:58
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anilEhilated posted:How is this not widely known as the most awesome weapon ever created?! One of the random effects is, I think, the same thing happening, but on the side of the person shooting it.
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Sep 9, 2015 12:00
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my dad posted:One of the random effects is, I think, the same thing happening, but on the side of the person shooting it. It used to be, but now I think the worst result is either a double 1 in which case the Mek blinks out of existence or a double 2 or 3 which are fairly inaccurate and can potentially wander into your own dudes. In earlier editions though a double 1 opened up a warp vortex which then ate the Mek and every nearby model. e: Have a picture:  And this is what it looks like while firing:  Yep, that's a weaponized warp portal alright 
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Sep 9, 2015 12:11
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Let's face it, orks are just superior.
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Sep 9, 2015 12:16
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Neruz posted:
Holy gently caress that weirdboy in the back 
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Sep 9, 2015 12:30
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Heaven Spacey posted:Holy gently caress that weirdboy in the back Working as intended.
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Sep 9, 2015 12:53
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He hasn't exploded yet so he's doing rather well all things considered.
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Sep 9, 2015 12:56
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He's even still got his own head to boot. By the way, D-Cannon blasts can ALSO teleport their target. Including straight down or up. I think it can wink them out of existence, too. But it's been a while since I read the codex so eh.
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Sep 9, 2015 13:23
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Their's a reason almost every game, narrative and similar that GW puts out tends to have the Orks being the witless minions being manipulated by Chaos or some other force who're the 'real' villains. Ultimately I expect that in the end they'll reveal that Gork and Mork are Tzeench or something putting on a facade to control the Orks.
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Sep 9, 2015 13:51
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Onmi posted:Their's a reason almost every game, narrative and similar that GW puts out tends to have the Orks being the witless minions being manipulated by Chaos or some other force who're the 'real' villains. Ultimately I expect that in the end they'll reveal that Gork and Mork are Tzeench or something putting on a facade to control the Orks. I prefer the view that Gork (and/or Mork) have been acting brutally cunning to trick all them other lot into fighting each other so that the Boyz can have some right good scrapping. :orkz:
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Sep 9, 2015 14:01
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The Orks are the only faction in the entire setting who have everything they want. If any faction can be said to be winning, its the Orks.
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Sep 9, 2015 14:13
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"The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn? And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude." -From Culture vs. Kultur: Thoughts on Orkish Society by Uthan the Perverse, a controversial Eldar philosopher
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Sep 9, 2015 14:19
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I once got a role in a panto by giving an monologue from one of the old Ork codexs. Orks truly are the only winners, even IRL.
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Sep 9, 2015 14:47
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Fun Orks are the best orks. This is why Deffwotch is one of the best things. I'm kinda sad that the Tau aren't actually a galactic threat of any kind due to the fact they told us how small they are: you've basically made a faction of cool shooter guys and then said 'if you ever run a campaign of anything (tabletop minatures or RPG) not set in the galactic east, you're not gonna see tau at all) and that's kinda sad for stuff like Rogue Trader and Black Crusade, where looting the little buggers of all their shiny toys is great because it's much much safer than their imperial equivalent (in most cases).
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Sep 9, 2015 15:53
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Bahumat posted:Fun Orks are the best orks. This is why Deffwotch is one of the best things. I once ran a mecha campaign of Rogue Trader staring an Imperial Knight, an Eldar Wraithknight, an Ork Mekboy who piloted the Waaghzinger Z who had a Weirdboy nemesis Named Dokter 'Ell, a Tau named Shas'Ui Say'La the sister of Shas'El Sha'znabl. and Captain Hathaway, the Rogue Trader pretending to be an Inquisitor pretending to be a Rogue Trader. It was a fun game but didn't last long. Heresy of the highest order of course.
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Sep 9, 2015 16:20
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Onmi posted:I once ran a mecha campaign of Rogue Trader staring an Imperial Knight, an Eldar Wraithknight, an Ork Mekboy who piloted the Waaghzinger Z who had a Weirdboy nemesis Named Dokter 'Ell, a Tau named Shas'Ui Say'La the sister of Shas'El Sha'znabl. and Captain Hathaway, the Rogue Trader pretending to be an Inquisitor pretending to be a Rogue Trader. Is Rouge Trader any good? I played some Dark Herisy, but it always felt like you're stats were always really low for inquisitorial agents. My Tech Priest who survived a nuke to the face, got killed by a Molotov cocktail dropped by one of the other players. He'd survive the flames, but couldn't put it out. So he just kept burning to death over the course of ten turns. poo poo was painful. But I've heard Rouge Trader is quite different, I just don't want to waste my money before I nab myself a copy.
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Sep 9, 2015 16:39
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Arashiofordo3 posted:Is Rouge Trader any good? I played some Dark Herisy, but it always felt like you're stats were always really low for inquisitorial agents. My Tech Priest who survived a nuke to the face, got killed by a Molotov cocktail dropped by one of the other players. He'd survive the flames, but couldn't put it out. So he just kept burning to death over the course of ten turns. poo poo was painful. It's a fun system. definitely worth picking up. Also there's some fun old lore in the first edition WH4ok which was titled "Rogue Trader", such as half-eldar Ultramarines who was old for 70 years old and looking young. http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Rogue_Trader_(RPG) http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Rogue_Trader_(Sourcebook) Onmi fucked around with this message at 16:44 on Sep 9, 2015 |
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Sep 9, 2015 16:41
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Arashiofordo3 posted:Is Rouge Trader any good? I played some Dark Herisy, but it always felt like you're stats were always really low for inquisitorial agents. My Tech Priest who survived a nuke to the face, got killed by a Molotov cocktail dropped by one of the other players. He'd survive the flames, but couldn't put it out. So he just kept burning to death over the course of ten turns. poo poo was painful. That's kind of the charm, all the horrible ways you can die. But if anything Rogue Trader pcs are far stronger than DH. Rogue Trader is a weird fun eclectic game that as Omni said, ends up being heresy of the highest order. If you know about the old parody roots of 40k or just want something more whimsical in the grimdarkness of the far future Rogue Trader is great.
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Sep 9, 2015 16:59
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Arashiofordo3 posted:Is Rouge Trader any good? I played some Dark Herisy, but it always felt like you're stats were always really low for inquisitorial agents. My Tech Priest who survived a nuke to the face, got killed by a Molotov cocktail dropped by one of the other players. He'd survive the flames, but couldn't put it out. So he just kept burning to death over the course of ten turns. poo poo was painful. RT is probably the worst put together of the WH40kRPGs and remains popular because the premise works well for an RPG. It was FFG's first attempt at a 'high power' version of the game and it's got some serious mechanical wobbles (like how everyone has, on balance, less HP than they did in Dark Heresy while everyone is toting around much bigger guns) but they're not that much worse than any of the other 40kRP games. It desperately needs a second edition and some fixing up, especially the classes. The resident Techpriest (Explorator) is the real beginning of FFG's ludicrous techpriest boner and the Arch Militant is about as helplessly outmatched as a 3.5 D&D Fighter. If you want to be Space Cortez or whacky pirates beyond the Imperium, though, it works fine.
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Sep 9, 2015 17:12
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Night10194 posted:If you want to be Space Cortez or whacky pirates beyond the Imperium, though, it works fine. It really saddens me that GW built a universe with so much potential and they waste it all on Space Marine circlejerking. Turns out there's even not a single (CS Goto doesn't count, shut up) novel about the Orkz. That, that is a crime.
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Sep 9, 2015 18:03
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anilEhilated posted:And let's face it, who wouldn't want to be? Yes there is. http://www.blacklibrary.com/warhammer-40000/sanctus-reach-evil-sun-rising-hardback.html
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Sep 9, 2015 18:18
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Weird, the Black Library thread in TBB apparently didn't know about that one.
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Sep 9, 2015 18:21
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anilEhilated posted:Weird, the Black Library thread in TBB apparently didn't know about that one. Yeah, there was also that comic, Blood and Thunder (Boom! comics), and the one I was thinking of, Deff Skwadron (Still sold on the Black Library). Funny how most of the best stuff is written by current or ex 2000 AD writers (Deff Skwadron is Gordon Rennie (Necronauts, Missionary Man, Rogue Trooper, Cabalistics Inc), while Blood and Thunder is Dan Abnett (Creator of Sinister Dexter, among many many others) and Ian Edgington (Stickleback and The Red Seas))
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Sep 9, 2015 18:32
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Neruz posted:I believe the Shokk Attack Gun is actually potentially one of the most powerful weapons in the game if you roll a double 6 which is, IIRC: 'A ravening cloud of sentient daemonic ichor gushes out into the material realm, any model hit is removed from play. Vehicles take an automatic hit. Do not save, do not pass go, do not collect $200.' Ah, memories. Back in my 2nd edition heyday, I had an enemy Shokk Attack Gun one-shot my Avatar on turn one. My entire army aside from one unit of Fire Dragons failed their morale checks and ran off the board. Sadly I didn't win that one.
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Sep 10, 2015 00:35
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Lord Cyrahzax posted:Thule has to go: crush his army, then his base. Slaan posted:And then crush his spirit Chaeden posted:I concur with this. Time to end the space marines.  Well, okay. But I'm gonna be sad to see ol'Thule-y go. Well, jeez, O'Kais, I'm gonna miss you too! Hahaha, this thing never gets old.  Heads up, O'Kais, it took a turn to move into position so you won't get a "second attack" this round.   The enemy is at our doorstep and thinks he can push us off this world. He is already gloating. He can taste his victory-- --But what he fails to see is that we will make this his last meal. The Chief Librarian has ordered a purge of this world to protect our chapter's secrets. Are we to retreat with our duty unfulfilled? Are we to let a black mark stain the banner of the Blood Ravens? I say that we will not! I say our enemies will regret the day they ever decided to face us in battle! Our Battle Barge orbits overhead and will rain down the Emperor's holy fury on our opponents. More of our brothers will come to join the fight, but, as ever, our enemy outnumbers us. Each of you must be an army in your own right! Veterans of the First Company, the finest of our chapter, stand with us. Let their valour guide your fire into the enemy's heart! Remember that we are Blood Ravens, brothers. We have sworn to protect fonts of hidden knowledge. Each one of us must fall before handing this world to the enemy. The Emperor is with us. The Unknown Primarch is with us. They have come for our blood but they will drown in their own! Sir, you have an incoming message! Can it wait? They say it's urgent. Mmm, alright, hand it here. Hello? Frig off, xeno! I--SHAS'O, YOU--I'M GONNA-- *inhales deeply* --one, two, three, four, five-- *exhales* Sir? No, but seriously, surrender, Thule, if not for you, then for the Greater Good. The greater good is coming for you from my bolter, alien. Okay, good burn, I'll give you that--but you've seen what I can do. My forces are going to steamroll over you. Do the lives of your soldiers mean so little to you? Are you that mad? Do the lives of yours mean so much to you, alien? Are you that weak? *sigh* Alright, Thule. We'll do it your way. The fool--uh, what's going on? Why is our Cadre Command within a no-man's land? I SWEAR THE BASE WAS CLEAR WHEN WE sET IT UP, SHAS'O>>>THEY MUST HAVE BROUGHT IN MOBILE ARTILLERY. Hmm, we'll have to do something about that before we do anything else.  I'm fairly certain it's coming from the bluff, Shas'o.  Ah, yes, I can see the muzzle flare. Right, I'll take of this. I'll be right--  The First Company is with us! Strike at the enemy now! --oh.  Captain Thule sends his regards!  We've disabled the Dreadnought. The Space Marines have killed our Kroot Alpha Pack!! Hmm, we lost one of our Stealthsuit Teams, Shas'o. The Space Marines seem to be taking this a little more seriously than the Necron and Eldar did. Don't get your underwear in a twist, this is Thule we're talking about it. Right, our Honour Guard is wounded, but most of it remains. A Stealthsuit Team, Vespids, and two Fire Warrior Bodyguards. To be honest, now that the Earth Caste has upgraded Railgun Turrets on our strategic points, they could probably hold our base on its own. Thule isn't that bright, nor is he the brilliant tactician he professes to be. Gotta do something about that artillery, though.   Ah, hello! The benefits of a stealth field are once again all too obvious. Now what else is up here-- A Whirlwind. Light artillery, can fire from long distances and without line of sight. It's incredibly inaccurate without line of sight, though, so they aren't dangerous unless some ground troops are nearby as well. They're great at disrupting squads, which is a problem for my Fire Warriors. They're poorly armoured, though, so I'll be taking them apart before I leave. And I will be returning to base, because this bluff had some decent defenses. Turrets, tanks, these guys: Assault Terminators. Slow. They can Deep Strike anywhere on the map, though, and have unshakable morale--something, something, absolute faith in their "god" emperor. They are incredibly well-armoured, so I doubt I can kill off a squad on my own. I'll kill this guy before I leave. A Librarian. Detector unit, makes me vulnerable to the Terminators. He has pysker abilities, too, but I can out gun him.   Reinforcements have arrived. To battle, Blood Ravens! For the Emperor. The Blood Ravens will not fall to one such as you, xeno. Thule's certainly dug in. I'm gonna have to take out some of his toys. Welcome back, O'Kais. We have intel on the area. Patching you through to Cadre Command. Shas'o, we've identified three ways to annoy Thule. Go on One, steal the Space Marine Orbital Relay. It's just north-east of your location, and we can use it to feed their Battle Barge false target coordinates--blow up their stuff with their own guns! That'll also allow us to quickly transition into the second target: their forward base. We take that out, we'll cut off the majority of Thule's reinforcements. The third option takes us north-west, but it's an easy target. The Space Marine temple is out that way, along with the map relic. If we take that location (which is poorly defended because the Space Marines think it's heresy to properly entrench it), we'll be able to get Gregory onto the field. Basically, go north-west, take the relic, and get Gregory to the fight, or go north-east, steal Thule's Orbital Relay, and use his own guns to cut off his reinforcements? Exactly. Excellent intel. Shas'o, I would be remiss if I didn't point out how the Kroot would handle this mission. Oh? We would ignore all secondary objectives, ignore Thule's impotent soldiers, and make a straight-shot for his Fortress Monastery, bringing it all down on his head before he has a chance to response. Also an intriguing option. I'll let the War Council decide. O"KAIS>>>>>??? Oh, and while you're at it, decide whether we'll follow Kauyon or Mont'ka.
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Sep 10, 2015 05:35
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Get Gregory, Get Hammerheads, Get Rekt
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Sep 10, 2015 05:41
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Go North-West, get Gregory on the field ASAP. (And steal Thule's old fanfics from the temple ruins and read them out-loud on the radio)
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Sep 10, 2015 05:43
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