|
My best job was driving around as a 'clerk' delivering documents. Nobody gave a poo poo what we did as long as we delivered stuff. We made poo poo pay tho. Apparently a guy before us harassed one of the paralegals and made things real awkward but he was gone by the time I was there. My boss made me buy champagne for an end-of-year party once and I bought expensive stuff. Next year, another clerk got asked to do it smdh
N. Senada fucked around with this message at 14:03 on Jul 13, 2016 |
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:01
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 2, 2024 22:32 |
|
|
We have a community fridge that's stocked with a bunch of milk for coffee. Nobody ever uses a carton of milk when it's below 1/4 full because it's "old", even though we go through so much that the "old" milk was only opened a few hours ago. Our fridge is always full 6-7 milk contains with just a drop of milk in them that's taking up a huge amount of space and leaves no room for my lunch. I don't actually care all that much and will just pick out the almost empty ones for my own use, my real problem is listening to this one lady complain about it like it's the end of the world.
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:29
|
|
|
That lady complains about all the petty poo poo that happens it's really annoying. Also people keep dumping food scraps and those plastic coffee stirrers down the drain in the break room which keeps clogging it and burning out the pump.
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:32
|
|
|
You guys have a pump in your drain? Do you work below sea level???
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:34
|
|
|
notZaar posted:You guys have a pump in your drain? Do you work below sea level??? We're in the basement. My department is the red headed step child of the company. I like to refer to us as Robot House from that one episode of Futurama.
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:36
|
|
|
If youre dumb enough as to throw plastic poo poo in the sink you probably deserve the basement.
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:41
|
|
|
Renegret posted:That lady complains about all the petty poo poo that happens it's really annoying. Does it start to stink when the sink clogs and the dirty water just sits there? I bet part of the reason that lady complains is that she doesn't like sitting in smelly, unventilated basement with a filthy break room.
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:45
|
|
|
PallasAthene posted:Does it start to stink when the sink clogs and the dirty water just sits there? I bet part of the reason that lady complains is that she doesn't like sitting in smelly, unventilated basement with a filthy break room. no, it doesn't smell the water drains slowly but eventually and the ventilation is real good
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:58
|
|
|
So is working in a basement department just as funny and wacky as the British sitcom "The I.T. Crowd"?
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2016 14:59
|
|
|
Hector Beerlioz posted:But you turn around and ask just one more thing I've sent 27 coworkers to prison. This year.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:25
|
|
|
Hector Beerlioz posted:
About 10 years ago, I loaned my boss $500. Then we fought for a while. Then he paid me back. Now we are friends again
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:29
|
|
|
If he wants to go to Disney again, I might loan him another $500
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:31
|
|
|
We have a rogue shitter at work, twice in the past year there's been turds found on the bathroom floor with no apparent suspects. The HR lady coined the term "poo bandit" in her plea for a return to order.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:39
|
|
|
SilvergunSuperman posted:We have a rogue shitter at work, twice in the past year there's been turds found on the bathroom floor with no apparent suspects. Dude. That is why we tell you to lock the door
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:56
|
|
|
I'm the poo bandit
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 01:56
|
|
|
Wouldn't a bandit take away the poo, rather than leaving a poo behind? Sounds like a poo bandit is actually just what this situation needs.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:05
|
|
|
The midnight pooper that poops at midnight. Boom, baby!
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:12
|
|
|
Wicker Man posted:The midnight pooper that poops at midnight. Boom, baby! 
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:18
|
|
|
Drunk Nerds posted:Wouldn't a bandit take away the poo, rather than leaving a poo behind? Poo Robin Hood? I think most of HRs time at any company is spent trying to figure out who keeps making GBS threads on the floor.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:19
|
|
|
I have two coworkers who just....don't come in to work. They don't call out, they just stay home. One is tenured faculty and the other works in a remote corner of the building where the supervisors rarely go. The second person was threatened by HR last summer when they finally got wind of it, and she shaped up for a while but has since slid back to working maybe 2 days a week. In a very busy department with two other coworkers, who have to pick up her slack when she's out, but are too meek to call her out. Our boss knows about this, of course, but this employee is well-liked on a personal level and we're unionized, so no one has taken it upon themselves to document her absences or make any formal complaints. (Even though HR knows??? idgi) The absent faculty member, on the other hand, is not well-liked, but he is well-tenured, so he will continue to be employed for 30 years doing nothing and retire fat and happy on a big pension. He's one of the most transparently "all charm, no substance" people I've ever met, and he's probably living a double life. He might even be a serial killer. Everything he says sounds like a student bullshitting his way through an exam he hasn't studied for while thinking smugly that the teacher is too dumb to figure him out. And instead he fools no one, but again: unionized, no documentation, etc. Then I have another coworker who is up for tenure this year, but has done no research or scholarship, chairs committees but delegates all the work to the other members, openly admits to not giving a poo poo about her subject area and doesn't keep up with it, has done absolutely nothing to grow her department in the 6 years she's been here, is shamefully jealous of the person she supervises who is much better qualified for her job than she is, and she actively sabotages his attempts to promote and get grants for their department, because she is too loving dumb to realize that she is up for tenure this year and has nothing to show for it so those grants would sure look good on her CV oh boy!! And of course, she will get tenure anyway, and stay here for 30 years, and the department will stagnate, and students won't learn, and those of us (i.e., ME) who would kill for her job will die homeless and alone in a ditch somewhere, unremembered and unloved. THE END
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:46
|
|
|
There was a guy at our office who for days would not quit picking at something that looked like a small pimple on his neck. Generally speaking, this guy isn't the most hygienic person I've ever seen so I always make sure to use the hand wipes after I'm done handling the paper work he gives me. Eventually, the pimple on his neck turns into a huge boil. So large that he started tilting his head to avoid aggravating it. He finally goes to see a doctor a few days later, and it turns out to be a serious staph infection. The paperwork he had been doing for at least two weeks at the office was contaminated. So.... me and the rest of the guys get into a panic and start wiping the office down with Clorox wipes. We smashed his keyboard with a sledge and changed his desk out along with burning all the paper work he'd been working on. He wasn't allowed back in the office by the doctor for at least three days at which point he arrives to a clean desk, new keyboard and paperwork gone. gently caress staph. Salty Josh fucked around with this message at 02:57 on Jul 14, 2016 |
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 02:54
|
|
|
Hector Beerlioz posted:At my friends job they hired a new lady. They had interviewed her over skype and she was very knowledgeable and seems like a good fit so they brought her on. She was fired two weeks later. Wooooo! This is the reason we do phone and then in person interviews. I was a senior and interviewed this guy on the phone about the position. Nailed it. Answered almost every question and knew the ones he did miss would be one google search away to answer it. In person interview. I am glad to be there and I start going on variations of and more complicated questions. Guy looked at me like a deer in headlights as he stammered up a stream of poo poo which he considered to be the answer. I knew something was up and so did my manager. Lobbed him a softball question to confirm my suspicion and he bombed that one. I stopped the interview because I sure wasn't going to be taking up an hour of my time with this guy. Told my manager that was not the same guy on the phone. He asked if I was sure; like night and loving day. Turned out the contractor didn't tell their phone guy to hold back on the great answers the in-person guy would never be able to get. I am pretty sure that got that contracting company blackballed.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 03:20
|
|
|
normally I wouldn't give two shits about some of my coworkers less-than-perfect behavior because it's stupid petty poo poo, but since I have to work with them almost every day, every little thing becomes their entire personality in my mind. one guy is a lingerer, as others have mentioned, who slowly saunters out and waits like a droopy-eared puppy dog for a "bye" in response one guy is a sensitive manchild who throws a fit if he doesn't get his way one guy is a slacker whose work is always sloppy and causes problems for others, and probably hasn't learned anything since he started one guy is extremely shy and turns simple requests into word salad full of passive voice and "I'm sorry, but"s and "I'm not really sure"s the women are all very competent and not annoying though which is great
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 04:34
|
|
|
SciFiDownBeat posted:normally I wouldn't give two shits about some of my coworkers less-than-perfect behavior because it's stupid petty poo poo, but since I have to work with them almost every day, every little thing becomes their entire personality in my mind. So which one of those guys is you?
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 05:22
|
|
|
Rabbit Hill posted:
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 05:23
|
|
|
Runefaust posted:My boss is married to a Japanese woman and they have a 10 year old son. They haven't been intimate in years, they sleep in separate rooms, and every time he's attempted to bring up divorce his wife threatens to either take his son and flee back to Japan or commit seppuku. So your boss is a Japanese man?
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 07:21
|
|
|
one of my coworkers smelled like piss today and i thought i was crazy until another confirmed it
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 07:41
|
|
|
There's a guy I work with that practically lives at the office - I can count on one hand the times I've come in or left and he hadn't been at his desk. A couple weeks ago I got called into my boss's office and found out he had been meticulously logging when I came in, when I left and how long my lunch breaks were for over a month. He brought this to my boss (over the head of his own boss) complaining that I was only putting in roughly 8 hour days. I got a half-hearted "back in my day at your stage of this career we put in AT LEAST 80 hour weeks every week and we liked it" speech and was told to try and come in more often (I haven't and don't plan to - I get my work done and the contract only asks for 40 hours a week). If anyone should be in trouble it's him for putting in twice the amount of time for basically the same quality result completed in the same amount of days as I could/do. Anyway, I got called in again yesterday for another complaint. Now he's mad that I stopped asking him to come to lunch with our group and not making him feel "welcome" in the office anymore. What is this guy's deal
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 08:10
|
|
|
i used to work on a USPS workfloor of like 600 people doing data entry. Every day without fail some idiot poo poo hell fucker would decide to try and microwave the vending machine popcorn and burn it super badly. Hooray
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 09:01
|
|
|
mds2 posted:Poo Robin Hood? Robin Pood surely
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 11:07
|
|
|
A Stupid Baby posted:i used to work on a USPS workfloor of like 600 people doing data entry. Every day without fail some idiot poo poo hell fucker would decide to try and microwave the vending machine popcorn and burn it super badly. Hooray How the hell does lunch work for you people, how the hell do you deal with getting people to work after lunch, and how do meetings work as far a getting every rear end in a top hat to show up. The security alone for a bunch of rear end in a top hat all going for SubWay at 11:50, to get there early in a hilarious miscalculation of hubris, is disheartening. This is from a blue collar dude (well 50/50 IT and machine maintenance), and damned if some of you people don't have some the most daintiest of delicate of white collars. After lunch people gently caress off and get sleepy. Solution: eat only when you can. Takes care of lunch hour, nobody leaves nobody to worry about. There is always one rear end in a top hat who pretends not to hear an announcement or alarm for a meeting (me). Solution, cant, whole situation shuts down if you need an rear end chewing, pretty obvious. Ditch the AC, conversation, and ergonomic rear end warmers; blue collar does not care, woman or man, hell you do not even have to work that hard. You will still get the assholes but its easier to tune out a guy listening to oval office rock in a 80db warehouse then a keyboard click quiet office full of people trying to hold back coffee farts in a tornado of hate around the break area. Just kidding, im pissing in the wind with you guys while getting punched in the face by my company that they call family/
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 12:39
|
|
|
Renegret posted:We have a community fridge that's stocked with a bunch of milk for coffee. Nobody ever uses a carton of milk when it's below 1/4 full because it's "old", even though we go through so much that the "old" milk was only opened a few hours ago.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 12:40
|
|
|
Murphy Brownback posted:There's a guy I work with that practically lives at the office - I can count on one hand the times I've come in or left and he hadn't been at his desk. A couple weeks ago I got called into my boss's office and found out he had been meticulously logging when I came in, when I left and how long my lunch breaks were for over a month. He brought this to my boss (over the head of his own boss) complaining that I was only putting in roughly 8 hour days. I got a half-hearted "back in my day at your stage of this career we put in AT LEAST 80 hour weeks every week and we liked it" speech and was told to try and come in more often (I haven't and don't plan to - I get my work done and the contract only asks for 40 hours a week). If anyone should be in trouble it's him for putting in twice the amount of time for basically the same quality result completed in the same amount of days as I could/do. If the contract is for only 40 hours and no overtime, ask him what it's like doing twice the amount of work for free. Then tell him snitches get stitches.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 12:57
|
|
|
My boss/owner of our company is actively running the business into the ground with his erratic behavior. He's taking testosterone in addition to already being emotionally unstable, is obsessed with working out, cars, and money. There's actually nothing wrong with this, and in other contexts could be hilariously awesome, but he disappears for days/weeks at a time, blowing off important commitments and meetings that are crucial to business. And when he does randomly reappear, his hormone-influenced self tried to aggressively micromanage for about two days, despite him not actually knowing what's going on anymore. Like, making decisions regarding clients he's never heard of, and loving over their entire file. We're actually currently being sued by three clients thanks to this. Oh well, money is pretty okay and I plan on riding this train until just before it crashes into a wall.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:21
|
|
|
Waffle! posted:If the contract is for only 40 hours and no overtime, ask him what it's like doing twice the amount of work for free. Then tell him snitches get stitches. Looks like we got ourselves another lazy entitled millenial.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:25
|
|
|
HD DAD posted:My boss/owner of our company is actively running the business into the ground with his erratic behavior. He's taking testosterone in addition to already being emotionally unstable, is obsessed with working out, cars, and money. There's actually nothing wrong with this, and in other contexts could be hilariously awesome, but he disappears for days/weeks at a time, blowing off important commitments and meetings that are crucial to business. And when he does randomly reappear, his hormone-influenced self tried to aggressively micromanage for about two days, despite him not actually knowing what's going on anymore. Like, making decisions regarding clients he's never heard of, and loving over their entire file. We're actually currently being sued by three clients thanks to this. Mid life crises are a bitch.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:30
|
|
|
grahf987 posted:How the hell does lunch work for you people, how the hell do you deal with getting people to work after lunch, and how do meetings work as far a getting every rear end in a top hat to show up. The security alone for a bunch of rear end in a top hat all going for SubWay at 11:50, to get there early in a hilarious miscalculation of hubris, is disheartening. This is from a blue collar dude (well 50/50 IT and machine maintenance), and damned if some of you people don't have some the most daintiest of delicate of white collars. After lunch people gently caress off and get sleepy. Solution: eat only when you can. Takes care of lunch hour, nobody leaves nobody to worry about. There is always one rear end in a top hat who pretends not to hear an announcement or alarm for a meeting (me). Solution, cant, whole situation shuts down if you need an rear end chewing, pretty obvious. Ditch the AC, conversation, and ergonomic rear end warmers; blue collar does not care, woman or man, hell you do not even have to work that hard. You will still get the assholes but its easier to tune out a guy listening to oval office rock in a 80db warehouse then a keyboard click quiet office full of people trying to hold back coffee farts in a tornado of hate around the break area. Just kidding, im pissing in the wind with you guys while getting punched in the face by my company that they call family/ What the gently caress are you talking about
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:34
|
|
|
Where do u guys work where ur bosses tell you about their whores and steroid abuse
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:37
|
|
|
Zzulu posted:Where do u guys work where ur bosses tell you about their whores and steroid abuse Small companies owned and run by people with more money than actual business acumen.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:42
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 2, 2024 22:32 |
|
|
CharlestonJew posted:What the gently caress are you talking about What else would I talk about, almost nothing.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2016 13:54
|
|