|
alcohol is a creator of good stories. Personally I don't drink anymore but the last alcohol crew thread  brought back memories, like switching stores to try to act like u don't drink that much.Even if ur not an alcoholic, post your best/worst alcohol stories.  Here's one of mine quote:I was drunk (duh) and was with my fwb and ex bf. We went to the grocery store to get dog treats, then we came back to my apartment complex at which point I proceeded to bark loudly like a dog. Some guy shouted loudly out his window "shut up you're disturbing the dogs!" So then I rolled in the grass until FWB and ex BF carried me into my apartment. "Woof!" Thin Privilege fucked around with this message at 11:02 on Aug 3, 2016 |
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 10:59
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 7, 2024 21:01 |
|
|
I had a beer. It was one of those fancy ones with the pint glass and the head and all that good stuff. Proper drinking stuff. And I had a sip and it was alright. But nothing special. Nothing to write on a forum about. That's pretty much it. Later as I paid my bill I thanked that bartender and then I left and went back home to sleep. THE END. Edit: and two weeks later I posted the above message about it.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:04
|
|
|
I get drunk a lot but because I'm a fifteen year veteran I don't make an rear end of myself.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:09
|
|
|
Drunken Baker posted:I get drunk a lot but because I'm a fifteen year veteran I don't make an rear end of myself. ty 4 service
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:11
|
|
|
Drinking veteran. I do not want to to steal valour from troops so long as they don't steal my valour by saying they're good drinkers when they're not.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:16
|
|
|
Half the fun of drinking is trying to remember your drinking stories and adventures. Like trying to remember why I've got a nasty bruise on the top of my head.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:19
|
|
|
once i woke up in a caravan park without any pants
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:28
|
|
|
Wicker Man posted:Half the fun of drinking is trying to remember your drinking stories and adventures. Like trying to remember why I've got a nasty bruise on the top of my head. lonesomedwarf posted:once i woke up in a caravan park without any pants More of these please
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:37
|
|
|
lonesomedwarf posted:once i woke up in a caravan park without any pants i woke up in the back seat of my car in a bar parking lot at dawn after making a complete rear end in a top hat of myself all evening with people from work, and didnt realize i was still completely shitfaced until id already driven halfway home. at that point i just gripped the wheel, thanked gently caress no one was on the road, got home and puked immediately, then spent most of the day on the living room floor because the couch was to good for dog poo poo like me
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:54
|
|
|
I told this guy to get in my car and ditched him in rugged wilderness and left my car at the bottom of valley and walked home
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 11:58
|
|
|
Decided to get some Sangria after work yesterday on a whim (usually drink beer). Had a couple cups of the poo poo and was greeted with the worst gas I've ever had- thought I was having a heart attack. Big, deep burps would relieve the pain for about 2 minutes, then it would come back. Went this way for hours until all I could do was lay on my bed and moan in pain. Somehow managed to pass out, only to bolt upright at around 1 am- I knew what was coming next. I dove headfirst into the bathroom, barely making it as I proceeded to projectile vomit as hard as possible into the toilet. Immediately got a huge sense of relief, and went back to bed feeling great! My only regret was that I didn't poo poo my pants  In other words, gently caress you Carlo Rossi...
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 12:07
|
|
|
i woke up in my undies handcuffed to my best friend, also in his undlewears and fast asleep, wrapped in a window curtain in the middle of the living room floor with no idea or memory how any of this happened
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 12:11
|
|
|
mng posted:ty 4 service
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 12:26
|
|
|
My craziest story was NYE 2011. I visited friends in Minneapolis and started drinking at like 8 PM. I barely remember midnight and from what I later gathered I kept drinking until 2 AM. Based on receipts and memories from earlier in the night, I had about 21 shots in those 6 hours. I believe the most I had ever drank in that kind of time span previously was like a dozen. Anyway, I wake up the next morning in a stranger's bedroom on the floor using my coat as a blanket. I get up and some guy I've never seen before is in the bed. (I regret to tell you that I was not raped by a gay man, but boy would that have been a story!) Apparently at 3 AM or so I thought I was outside my friend's apartment building but I was actually like a mile away at some other apartment. Somehow I saw this guy entering the apartment and he ended up talking to my friends on my phone and they convinced him to let me sleep in his apartment so I wouldn't die outside in the freezing cold. And he actually let me. As I was walking the one mile back to my friend's apartment the next morning I stopped at McDonald's. As I was in line, some lady asked me if I knew what my face looked like. Which is never a good thing to be asked... so I went into the bathroom and I had giant cuts and scrapes on my face, some of which were open and bleeding at that time. I assume that I just fell down, possibly repeatedly - but we'll never know for sure!
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 14:39
|
|
|
Every time I drink I get morose and depressed, I hate drinking.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:01
|
|
|
Last time I blacked out it was at a convention. Someone who staffed the convention was around me in a hotel room and said they had to call for an ambulance because of liability reasons, and the ambulance cost me 1700 dollars. When I was being driven home after being at the hospital I asked the driver to change the channel on his in-dash LCD screen thinking it was a TV. 1700 loving dollars
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:06
|
|
|
drunk driving is really fun at the time, really weird and horrifying afterward
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:09
|
|
|
I AM the liquor....
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:11
|
|
|
and i don't mean like i got a little buzz on and it's a bit like a video game, i mean full on call of duty blackout hosed up drunk driving 10+ miles and waking up the next morning wondering htf you got home
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:13
|
|
|
nomadologique posted:and i don't mean like i got a little buzz on and it's a bit like a video game, i mean full on call of duty blackout hosed up drunk driving 10+ miles and waking up the next morning wondering htf you got home My parents' friend just crashed his car doing this. When they checked his blood at the hospital, he blew a .4 
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:15
|
|
|
don't do it kids. well ok do it like a few times in your teens or early twenties, just yknow, to see what it's like.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:23
|
|
|
i got real drunk in a spaceport and agreed to take a punk kid and an old man on a fantastical journey lmao
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:30
|
|
|
nomadologique posted:drunk driving is really fun at the time, really weird and horrifying afterward As I kid I got drunk and drove through a field with my mate hanging off the roof of the car. Never driven before or since. Was p.cool if also p.stupid.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:44
|
|
|
Also never threw up on a fire. Might try that this Saturday. Threw up in plenty of ponds when I was younger though. I want to die without regrets.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:45
|
|
|
I got hit by a car
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:52
|
|
|
the other night at a bar I fell so hard onto a pointy chair on my ribs that it left a bruise the size of my fist right on top of my heart. its a shocking sight but I guess nothing broke so its all good. after the fall I did kind of a nice maneuver and landed on my back with my legs in the air like a planned dismount and I got a round of applause. I was told it was quite graceful considering the potential damage to my skeleton.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:54
|
|
|
I suppose everyone then broke out into singing bohemian rhapsody? 
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:56
|
|
|
also I lost my credit card
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:56
|
|
|
dad gay. so what posted:the other night at a bar I fell so hard onto a pointy chair on my ribs that it left a bruise the size of my fist right on top of my heart. its a shocking sight but I guess nothing broke so its all good. after the fall I did kind of a nice maneuver and landed on my back with my legs in the air like a planned dismount and I got a round of applause. I was told it was quite graceful considering the potential damage to my skeleton. i got a bruise on my heart at the bar once but it was because of a dame with gams that wouldn't quit
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 15:58
|
|
|
Jerry Mumphrey posted:i got a bruise on my heart at the bar once but it was because of a dame with gams that wouldn't quit some girls have all the luck 
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:00
|
|
|
Jerry Mumphrey posted:i got a bruise on my heart at the bar once but it was because of a dame with gams that wouldn't quit She punched you in the sternum?
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:01
|
|
|
notZaar posted:She punched you in the sternum? what she done to me made a punch in the gut from a knuckle-draggin galoot feel like a kiss goodnight *lights cigarette*
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:02
|
|
|
Almost all my stories are just gross and shameful and involve my barf / dick going places they shouldn't.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:08
|
|
|
just ray posted:some girls have all the luck 
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:08
|
|
|
one time I got drunk and posted the n-word and got banned from something awful
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:15
|
|
|
Drunken Baker posted:I get drunk a lot but because I'm a fifteen year veteran I don't make an rear end of myself. You're doing it wrong. Edit: Once I puked in a urinal. It made sense at the time. I've also removed the lid to a toilet tank and puked into the lid. Not the tank, just the lid. This also made sense at the time.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:18
|
|
|
I was at a wedding rehearsal dinner. First time I ever had hard liquor. Apparently, I was not well educated on proportions of alcohol to mixers. So, I filled an old fashioned sized glass with half vodka and half Fresca. Then went to the hot tub to sit for 20 minutes. I basically had to crawl my way back to my room. Which was upstairs. I crawled up stairs to get to bed where I passed out immediately. Never underestimate the value of a measure. Egbert Souse fucked around with this message at 16:42 on Aug 3, 2016 |
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:38
|
|
|
hot tub wedding
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:40
|
|
|
dad gay. so what posted:hot tub wedding Heh, I meant to put wedding rehearsal dinner. It was at a hotel with a pool and hot tub during the summer. Not that a hot tub wedding is a bad idea
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2016 16:43
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 7, 2024 21:01 |
|
|
went to a Rocky Horror afterparty that started with me taking tequila shots with a twink and ended with me smoking weed with a drag queen went to a different party where before the party we went and got snacks and I got some pepper jack cheese that I ended up sticking in the hosts fridge. party ends, I grabbed my cheese and staggered home along the highway gnawing on the brick another time I ended up drunk calling the Canadian cops cause my friend was threatening to kill herself I'm glad I quit drinking
|
|
#
?
Aug 4, 2016 06:26
|
|
