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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:i wish i owned some cool viking poo poo but if you sell the guns you can buy cool viking poo poo double-edged sword bro, sell the new hotness of killtoys or go old school with poo poo you know would make a home invader poo poo their britches with first sight. like a big rear end mace or 30 pound double-edged axe. besides, you can always keep one gun to suck start later. just in case
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Jul 12, 2014 19:27
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Carteret posted:My stomach acid is so hosed up that if I don't take Omeprazole daily it inflames my esophagus to the point where I can't eat properly. Food gets stuck in my throat, and I have to puke and start over. It feels like you are loving drowning on food and drink. Get a colonoscopy, get a gastroscopy, get whatever it takes if you can get it. If you have an eosinophilic esophagitis, you'll want to know and do something about it as soon as humanely possible. Usual treatments with omeprazole aren't supposed to exceed 12 months at dosages of 20mg per day or 6 months at 40mg per day, no idea how long you've been on it or on what dosage. Stay on it too long without taking care of the cause of whatever it is that you have, you'll end up needing to ramp up the dosage and after a few years, you'll be up to quadruple the usual dosage per day and you won't be able to get off it. First 6-12 hours off, you'll get heartburn without even having meals, next 12 hours off you'll be guzzling down water just to keep the stomach acid diluted and flush your throat. After that, you'll start throwing up even plain ol' water and blood. Meanwhile, the increased dosage over the years fucks with your system to the point where blowing liquid poo poo out your rear end is your primary form of taking a dump. Staying on small doses of omeprazole for the rest of your life against basic heart burn is perfectly doable, but when there's something more complicated causing the heart burn or more severe symptoms (like yours), get your poo poo looked at. Also, you get to take a hard black thing up the pooper, so...let 'er rip, boner. /edit distinct lack of titties on this here page http://i.imgur.com/94mbXa3.jpg 
Duzzy Funlop fucked around with this message at 20:14 on Jul 12, 2014 |
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Jul 12, 2014 20:11
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LITERALLY SHAKING posted:but if you sell the guns you can buy cool viking poo poo http://www.gransforsbruk.com/en/products/gransfors-ancient-axes/gransfors-swedish-viking-axe/
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Jul 12, 2014 20:45
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Carteret posted:My stomach acid is so hosed up that if I don't take Omeprazole daily it inflames my esophagus to the point where I can't eat properly. Food gets stuck in my throat, and I have to puke and start over. It feels like you are loving drowning on food and drink. Looks like someone's getting a fundoplication surgery someday. If you're lucky they won't have to shove a
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Jul 12, 2014 20:54
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holy gently caress all you guys are messed up(medically). I'm a old fucker with a 1990s garrison service record, and don't have any of those medical issues(yet).
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Jul 12, 2014 21:10
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tuluk posted:1990s garrison service record. well
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Jul 12, 2014 21:22
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exactly, I feel no shame about it. got a worse gi bill too. quantumfoam fucked around with this message at 21:45 on Jul 12, 2014 |
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Jul 12, 2014 21:38
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Dingleberry posted:http://www.gransforsbruk.com/en/products/gransfors-ancient-axes/gransfors-swedish-viking-axe/ Um, he clearly specified double edged sword, which that is not
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Jul 12, 2014 21:50
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Lmao at joining the mil and not getting a sweet GI bill.
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Jul 12, 2014 21:50
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gleep gloop posted:Lmao at joining the mil and not getting a sweet GI bill. He got way better deployments and TDYs, I bet. Most of the awesome places are gone.
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Jul 12, 2014 22:53
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Snowdens Secret posted:Um, he clearly specified double edged sword, which that is not 6 of 1, half dozen of the other. long as you can swing it into a skull it's gravy
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Jul 12, 2014 23:15
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Surely there's still a 1st class celebrity plane seat waiting for him out there, somewhere.
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Jul 13, 2014 16:18
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Relentlessboredomm posted:At least it works. Prilosec made everything in my stomach go loving crazy. The many joys of IBS. I suppose I could have Crohns, I never bothered to get the colonoscopy to find out since it's fairly manageable so long as I avoid an ever growing list of different foods. If you think you have Crohns you need to see a doctor about it. That poo poo is nothing to fool around with 
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Jul 13, 2014 16:46
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Delizin posted:If you haven't already done it, there is some kind of blood test to rule out Crohns too. If I recall what the doctor told me correctly, it is a dna test and if you don't have a specific gene then you can't have Crohns. If you do have the gene then they can do further testing like the colonoscopy to see if you have it. You can also just try a gluten free diet for awhile and see if it makes you feel any better. Hmmm I didn't know about the blood test. Figures the military doctor wouldn't say anything about it. Gluten free made no difference for me. Sadly the diet that works best is never eating too much of any one food and avoiding things with lots of spices or fat i.e. everything I love. Also yogurt, that stuff is miraculous. Nostalgia4Infinity posted:If you think you have Crohns you need to see a doctor about it. That poo poo is nothing to fool around with I suppose although I'm not convinced I have it. I've known a few people with Crohns and it's loving horrific. What I have is incredibly mild compared to them and I still have only ever had one symptom occur twice (being woken up by intestinal pain) everything else is pretty typical of IBS. Carteret posted:My stomach acid is so hosed up that if I don't take Omeprazole daily it inflames my esophagus to the point where I can't eat properly. Food gets stuck in my throat, and I have to puke and start over. It feels like you are loving drowning on food and drink. Jesus Christ. You poor bastard.
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Jul 13, 2014 17:22
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:If you think you have Crohns you need to see a doctor about it. That poo poo is nothing to fool around with Jesus N4I, that loving pun. Mods???
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Jul 13, 2014 19:12
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Jul 13, 2014 19:16
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did somebody save n4i's chocolate adventure story to gip.txt? i'd read that poo poo again.
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Jul 13, 2014 19:29
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:If you think you have Crohns you need to see a doctor about it. That poo poo is nothing to fool around with edit: When I got scoped, they gave me the poo poo Michael Jackson took. Holy gently caress, that's some goooood poo poo. I could feel it tingle all the way up my arm. By the time it got to my head, loving lights out! Mad Dragon fucked around with this message at 20:11 on Jul 13, 2014 |
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Jul 13, 2014 20:09
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Ya a guy in my old unit had Crohn's and he had a lot of sick time due to the fact that he was bleeding into his intestines from it. He almost died from it once while I was in, dude lost like 40 pounds and he wasn't big to begin with. It's some freaky stuff
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Jul 13, 2014 20:22
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I assure you all that pun was unintentional.  For the record nothing I did in the Air Force would make my mom proud, but my dad gave me a high five when I told him I banged a pilot.
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Jul 13, 2014 21:39
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:my dad gave me a high five when I told him I banged a pilot. cool dad
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Jul 13, 2014 21:59
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Getting my scope done on Friday hooray.
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Jul 13, 2014 22:09
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Mr. Nice! posted:Getting my scope done on Friday hooray. Do a popper and drink some wine coolers beforehand, it'll help you relax and enjoy it. Serious question: do they tell you to do an enema beforehand?
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Jul 13, 2014 22:11
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Enema or laxatives with Gatorade.
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Jul 13, 2014 22:13
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Got a dude in my unit who has Crohn's disease and is getting med board. He was a whiny oval office before hand and it certainly hasn't helped that now, despite the fact that his is very, very mild. He also totally believes that 9/11 was perpetrated by the government and that HIV is a weaponized virus because he saw a documentary on it. He also makes everyone he deals with life a misery because he's got Crohn's disease and everyone should be an expert in it even though he thinks he got it from MREs, or possibly a government conspiracy because he has heard of 2 other people on Benning having it. In other words I hope his Crohn's kills him by making his rear end in a top hat fall out in a horrible, painful way, and I get to watch his agonizing death. Sorry about things getting put up you guy's butts though.
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Jul 13, 2014 22:36
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:I assure you all that pun was unintentional. Was he still happy when you told him it was a dude?
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Jul 13, 2014 22:55
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I know you're a fat pig but you could at least some effort into your "burns" 
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Jul 14, 2014 00:50
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:Do a popper and drink some wine coolers beforehand, it'll help you relax and enjoy it. They're going down the front and not the back on this.
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Jul 14, 2014 01:05
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Mr. Nice! posted:They're going down the front and not the back on this. In the peehole?
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Jul 14, 2014 01:20
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PLANES CURE TOWERS posted:Enema or laxatives with Gatorade. Movi-Prep: A vile prescription-only concoction that will make you poo poo water. Not watery shits. Water. Out your rear end in a top hat. Mr. Nice! posted:They're going down the front and not the back on this. They'll probably make you fast overnight.
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Jul 14, 2014 01:25
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:I know you're a fat pig but you could at least some effort into your "burns" It was an honest question
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Jul 14, 2014 01:44
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krispykremessuck posted:In the peehole? That would be the loving worst. Mad Dragon posted:They'll probably make you fast overnight. Yeah there's a list of instructions that came with the appointment letter. Can't eat after midnight the day before or anything the day of. They're putting me under apparently and require that I have a driver with me.
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Jul 14, 2014 02:36
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Mad Dragon posted:Movi-Prep: A vile prescription-only concoction that will make you poo poo water. Not watery shits. Water. Out your rear end in a top hat. did that after iraq. couldn't keep down water for more than an hour, then i'd throw it up. while also peeing water out my butthole, fun times.
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Jul 14, 2014 02:50
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If you've not pissed out your rear end before, you haven't ever been to the middle east and eaten street food.
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Jul 14, 2014 02:58
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If you eat street food in the middle east you're borderline retarded. There's a reason you're taking doxy every day and they tell you not to eat or drink anything from the locals.
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Jul 14, 2014 08:03
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Mr. Nice! posted:If you've not pissed out your rear end before, you haven't ever been to
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Jul 14, 2014 08:46
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Mr. Nice! posted:That would be the loving worst. You'll probably just get a shot of Midazolam or something similar. Makes you sleepy and give less of a gently caress, but you won't be straight out. If you're anything like me and don't exactly have the gag-reflex of a roadside ladyboy in Phuket, there's a chance you'll wake right up in the middle of the procedure and wretch like a motherfucker while they try to calm you down and continue the procedure because pulling out the scope and starting all over again would be more complicated since they can't give you a second shot of midazolam in short order. First time I had a gastroscopy done, I woke up in the middle of it choking and flailing my arms wildly, caught the 15-year-old intern right on the button because they didn't consider putting restraints on a 260lbs dude before forcing black phallic objects down his throat. Oh, and a side-effect of midazolam outside of making you all groggy is a complete failure to remember anything within the next couple of hours after the shot so get one of your not-so-rape-vibey friends to drive you.
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Jul 14, 2014 12:12
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Yeah my roommate is going to drive me. They put in the letter that if I don't show check in with a driver they will cancel my appointment and give me the boot.
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Jul 14, 2014 12:28
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Duzzy Funlop posted:MDZ stuff If you like benzo stories, look up phenazepam trip reports. Nothing like intending to take less than 0.5 mg and ending up with a two week gap in memory in which you lost your job and got arrested repeatedly.
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Jul 14, 2014 13:12
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First time I got a shot of midazolam, a friend picked me up afterwards and, because I said I still needed to grab some groceries, figured it'd be okay to just drop me off at the store around the corner, surely i'd be able to make my way back no problem. Woke up with a fridge full of roughly 120 bucks worth of poo poo and no recollection of buying, let alone needing it in the first place. 4 pounds of meat, 3 pounds of black tiger prawns, a year's supply of loving sugar and flour, obscene amounts of canned goods, baby wipes, air freshener, about 200 yards of aluminum foil, soy milk, countless cans of deodorant, etc....felt like a metrosexual doomsday prepper ran wild or something. Keep in mind that almost the entirety of the poo poo was crammed into the fridge. Yes, canned food, babywipes and all. Duzzy Funlop fucked around with this message at 13:49 on Jul 14, 2014 |
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Jul 14, 2014 13:46
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