Feces, garbage bags, destroyed apartment, insanity.

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The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Feces, garbage bags, destroyed apartment, insanity.

Jadus: Sep 11, 2003

This story makes me so glad i don't have a roommate anymore.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:43

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# ? Jun 19, 2013 22:30

Ansiktsburk: Feb 20, 2001; There's a Dr. Fist here to see you.

The Black Time post was creepy in the same way that ghost story threads are. :( I had planned on a nap, too.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:43

Chemicalis: May 27, 2001

quote:

NerdyMcNerdNerd came out of the closet to say:
This is one of the best stories, I've ever read, in my entire life.

I must have closure

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:43

thekidd: Feb 22, 2004; 9pi

I have to hear the ending now.

I have to know how this ends :(

wxwqbafowihuhhqmgapa

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:45

Martin Random: Jul 18, 2003; [color=red][size="medium"]"My problem is I'm coming back to SA from another private forum where the average post size is about 15 paragraphs and there is a very professional

quote:

323LX came out of the closet to say:

Can you please answer my question about the batteries from the previous page too??

I was worried about this too. Apparently it worked out though, because it could sit for long periods of time without draining the battery. I tested it and it lasted a weekend with no problem, not even slight sluggishness. I think it went into sleep mode or something. I had a crazy backup system whereby the car wasn't required to even lift the bar, but instead just nudge a little thing that would roll down a ramp, knocking the bar out of place, just in case it was running too low on power to lift the bar, but I never had to use it because the batteries lasted. They even lasted for a week while I was away on break.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:45

Malleus: Apr 19, 2003; by Lowtax

quote:

Martin Random came out of the closet to say:
The Black Time:

It's like the worst best Infocom game ever.

>>use vaporub

What do you want to use the jar of Vaporub on?

>>nose

You apply Vaporub to your nose

>>n

You are in a dark room. The scent of death fills the air.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:49

Mike Toole: Apr 9, 2001; WE ARE GOING BACK!!

This is incredibly entertaining. You've really packaged the misery and insanity that plagued your life into a wonderful, humorous little tale. Thank you!

If I were you, I would be serving 20 to life for 1st degree murder, and Jed would be finely diced and scattered all over the western seaboard.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:49

The Debian: Oct 31, 2003; NOW MY CUSTOM TITLE IS THE MOST ANNOYING ONE IN THE BOSTON THREAD!

quote:

sigtrap came out of the closet to say:
From now on, any time somebody posts about how "My roommate sucks. Sometimes his socks are on MY side of the room", all we have to do is link to this thread to shut them up.

Goddamn.

Interestingly enough, this thread shut up the original roommate thread that this story was grown out of, and Random wasn't even trying.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:51

Hellmonkey2k: Jun 27, 2004; Flinging poo at loved ones since the New Millenium

You absolutely MUST tell us the results in all this! The blueballs are killing us all!

(Anxiously waiting "The Remainder")

Art Blog

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:55

Target Practice: Aug 20, 2004; Shit.

loving subscribed. I've had my share of lovely roommates, but this guy makes those assholes look like loving Mr. Rogers.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:57

MyMonkeyMAN: Jul 11, 2001

You really let things go too far, you should have called the cops at the first oppertunity.

harn?

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:57

ClassyLassie: Apr 20, 2004; born and raised

Thank you so much for this.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 22:57

Rotten Red Rod: Mar 5, 2002

Does anyone have a link to the recent thread on bad roommates he mentions? I love reading stories like this.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:00

c0ldfuse: Jun 18, 2004; The pursuit of excellence.

quote:

ClassyLassie came out of the closet to say:
Thank you so much for this.

Although I do question the letting it go sooo long, because it was you and no me, I'm happy to be reading one of the best stories on SA I've ever read.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:01

Fancy Salad: Jun 10, 2003; The first is the most fabulous...

Your pain equals quality entertainment for the rest of us. Sorry that you had to experience hell. Now lets get some closure for ths thing... :-)

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:03

Sepherothic: Feb 8, 2003

It was totally worth putting off calling the authorities just to see the depths of insanity that this guy would go to. You've got to be prety bat-poo poo insane to maintain a feces lasanga.

p.s. finish the story soon, your breaking my balls.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:04

QwertyAsher: Sep 21, 2004; The #1 Threat to Ba Sing Se

quote:

Malleus came out of the closet to say:
It's like the worst best Infocom game ever.

>>use vaporub

What do you want to use the jar of Vaporub on?

>>nose

You apply Vaporub to your nose

>>n

You are in a dark room. The scent of death fills the air.

You have been eaten by a Grue

Holy poo poo man, I think you are, in fact, the long prophesized Megajesus.

Thread Subscribed, eagerly awaiting conclusion, please no pictures, it would ruin what my mind has made(A cavern with Stala(gmites/ctites) made out of poo poo, and hidden things in the dark, also, you are exploring the place with a wooden torch)

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:05

Vitruvian Pimp: Nov 17, 2004; its cool dude, just chill brah

OP: *fap**fap**fap**fap**fap*
me: *slams F5 over and over again waiting for conclusion*

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:08

criscodisco: Feb 18, 2004; My cat is better than your cat, because my cat is named Super Nintendo Chalmers.

"The Black Time" reminds me somewhat of "House of Leaves".

This thread is awesome, I can't wait for the no-doubt horrifying conclusion.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:09

ReidRansom: Oct 25, 2004

wow.... I mean, loving wow... rogue turds?? fecal lasagna!!?? You have conjured images in my mind which I really wish weren't there. Also, I will likely compare all foul things to fecal lasagna in my mind from now on, rear end in a top hat.

ReidRansom fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2004 around 23:17

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:12

kiimo: Jul 24, 2003; I think your brain is going soft with all that comedy

quote:

criscodisco came out of the closet to say:

This thread is awesome, I can't wait for the no-doubt horrifying conclusion.

I'm still waiting for the reason he called the ambulance.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:13

Jutaro: Apr 23, 2004; I want to be a funny man.

Ahhh!! Tell us the end already you bastard!

2d8dcee59fc61123149a1de19b9a78d3

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:14

The Trickster: Jul 9, 2002; Yeah, well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

Thread subscribed, awaiting conclusion.

Fecal lasagna. Wow.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:15

Name not required: Oct 18, 2004; by Lowtax

I don't think the phrase "Pics or it didn't happen" has ever been more applicable than now.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:20

demonachizer: Aug 7, 2004

quote:

Name not required came out of the closet to say:
I don't think the phrase "Pics or it didn't happen" has ever been more applicable than now.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:21

gumption: Oct 4, 2004; by Ozma

quote:

Name not required came out of the closet to say:
I don't think the phrase "Pics or it didn't happen" has ever been more applicable than now.

Who cares whether it really happened or not? This story is fantastic.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:22

Name not required: Oct 18, 2004; by Lowtax

quote:

gumption came out of the closet to say:

Who cares whether it really happened or not? This story is fantastic.

Your statement appears to be factual.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:23

anus_presley: Jun 8, 2004

I hope someone makes a Doom3 mod based upon this story.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:24

moleman: Apr 26, 2003; Now the time has come to gather our forces and run.

I like the disjointed, discontinuous way you are presenting the information. It adds to the insanity.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:25

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# ? Jun 19, 2013 22:30

Pantaloons L'Fragrant: May 1, 2000; Yuss the re-proliferation and et cetera.

HOLY. loving. MOSES.

# ? Nov 28, 2004 23:26

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