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Directed by: Lee Tamahori (of the almost equally awful "Die Another Day") Starring: "Ice Cube", Samuel L. Jackson, Willem Dafoe Set in what seems to be present day(or very near future), the xXx program is alive and well, until it gets attacked completely out of the blue for no discernible reason 10 seconds into the movie. This first act sees Samuel L. Jackson reprising his role as Gibbons from the previous xXx movie, he and the same nerdy guy from the first movie escape the attack by making use of lots of explosions. At some point here we find out that xXx, the Vin Diesel one, has been killed, which I believe means he read the script and promptly burned it. At any rate, Gibbons and nerdy tech guy need to "go off the grid" and find a new xXx, one with even more attitude! So they break Ice Cube out of a federal prison. Apparently he and Gibbons were Navy Seals or something back in the day, but Ice Cube just had too much attitude, and a heart of gold, so he got thrown in jail, which is able to break out of(with lots of explosions) seemingly at will after Gibbons shows up. The movie pretty rapidly descends into what amounts to 1 part xXx, 1 parts Fast and the Furious, and 1 part awful Steven Segal type movie, with a liberal helping of explosions and assault rifles not yet in service. Highlights of the laughably bad variety include: -An army of gangastas with hearts of gold charging down the streets of DC in blinged out Hummers and such blaring rap and bravely defeating the US military. The best part was when a ridiculously blinged pickup truck ploughs right through a HMMWV like it was made of Styrofoam. -They carjack a loving tank using hydrolic lifts to prevent it from getting away, for a second there I expected them to somehow pull hubcaps off it and run off. -Ice Cube launching a Bradley fighting vehicle via aircraft carrier catapult into an M1 Abrams tank, causing an explosion 4 times more powerful than that which leveled Hiroshima. -Ice Cube pursuing a bullet train, in a car, which he jumps onto the rails, popping the tires, and actually manages to catch the train. I have to say, this movie actually manages to top the original xXx in terms of utterly ridiculous action and absurd plot devices. The main story though, if you ignore the really crazy stuff like the rogue aircraft carrier, is a lot more interesting than the first movie's. It's just as over the top and stupid as the first one, but somehow manages to be less likable, I think because none of the characters are even half interesting. Vin Diesel, like him or not, did a pretty good job with the role, Ice Cube just makes it feel like watching somebody play Grand Theft Auto. Basically, this movie is what everyone expected it to be - terrible, even for an action movie. RATING: 1 PROS: Can't think of any CONS: Ice Cube ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0329774/
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May 2, 2005 14:57
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 08:41 |
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Maybe if they would have cast Vin Diesel again and pulled him out about halfway through the movie, it might have redeemed itself, but they didn't. The car going on the rails to catch the train was loving RIDICULOUS. I literally threw my popcorn up and said, "What the gently caress!" This movie was blatantly horrible, and I can't believe both Samuel L. Jackson and Willem Dafoe agreed to act in this shitfest. I would be speaking even worse about this, but my friends and I only went to see xXx: State of the Union because we wanted to dick around. 1/5
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May 2, 2005 19:21
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After watching the original xXx I really wanted to hate this movie for everything that is wrong with the crap Hollywood is churning out, instead I was surprised to find this quite entertaining. I really hate the 'bling' factor in movies like 2 Fast 2 Furious etc etc, and this film has its fair share, but despite the hate I found myself cheering for the gangsters in their silver rimmed Hummers. If you expect 'common sense' and 'laws of physics' when watching a movie like this then of course it will irritate you. Overall the plot line was far more interesting than the original. PROS: tanks, aircraft carriers, tanks on aircraft carriers, trying to keep count of how many times they mentioned Vin Diesel had died. CONS: chase scenes that quickly turned into a chubby guy trying to run (on more than one occasion). "Ice Cube" in an rear end-tight diving suit. RATING: 3.5/5
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May 4, 2005 21:00
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I agree with Slizer - I went in thinking "Haha, xXx, God that was terrible and this will be more of the same. But I like laughing at bad movies." And I did laugh at a lot of incredibly stupid stuff - Tank Fight on an aircraft carrier and the use of the catapault, the "drive on the tracks to pop the tires and ride on rims" bit - but it was fun. The plot was pretty interesting, if a little muddled and clunky in the delivery. I liked having it set in America, instead of the globe-hopping bullshit from the first movie. Ice Cube as an action hero didn't bother me, but he wasn't stellar either. And I too loved how they had to mention "Xander Cage got killed!" every few minutes, with a total "Up yours, Diesel," attitude. I read on IMDb that there were two scripts for xXx 2 - the one that got made, and another involving Pirates on the South Pacific. I'd love to see another stupid, over the top xXx 3 with that plot and a new guy, but that probably won't happen given this film's performance. 3.5/5
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May 6, 2005 01:44
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Are you a bad enough dude to save the president?? Apparently Ice Cube is, in XXX2, he carjacks a tank and eats a buger and fries. I really liked the begining scene wth the Super Ninjas attack Gibbons & co. Ice Cube gets a wisecracking sidekick and Scott Speedman as an NSA agent who helps him out. Now as a DC native, I found the depiction of DC very unbelievable,ofcourse so was the whole movie, but I digess, there is no "southside" only Southeast DC. These little things bothered me through out the movie. I enjoy the president telling Dafoe "gently caress You!" and quoting Tupac. But a little brainless fun does hurt anyone, so I liked.
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May 8, 2005 03:38
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State of the Union is a movie that knows exactly what it is. It's not trying to pretend that it's a thriller or a drama or anything that even comes close to serious cinema. No, it's an action movie with a script that could've been pieced together from Manowar lyrics, Fastlane fanfiction and excerpts from the Serious Sam manual. The film is peppered with lines such as "We need someone [for our next xXx] with more attitude." and "Congratulations, you're the first people in history to be tankjacked!", but it's clear that it's all in jest and the sooner you realize it, the sooner you can enjoy this movie to its fullest. PROS: -Constant use of completely impossible timing, mostly involving vehicles arriving at the exact second a main character needs to jump into or onto it. I suspect this will be an integral part in any xXx-related drinking games once it comes out on video. -The seige of DC. Blinged Hummers fighting military personel, a motherfucking tankjacking (I was in stitches at this part), and the fact that a hard-rocking cover of "Fight the Power" done by Korn and Xzibit played throughout the entire scene. -The aircraft carrier shootout. This whole scene is almost a parody of all modern action films. 'Stealth' that's clearly obvious but nobody seems to notice, groan-worthy one liners, overstylized hand-to-hand combat, constant taunting of the bad guy, and creative use of the environment to waste the enemy. It's a thing of beauty. -How every item aquired on the scene is done videogame style. Literally, Ice Cube will walk into a room and they'll be a gun or suit of armor lying in plain sight with nobody anywhere near it. Every time this happens, Ice Cube looks just as confused as the rest of the audience. CONS: -The seige was not nearly long enough, weighing in at around sixteen minutes. I could've watched half hour of thugs in Hummers and tanks tearing up the capitol building. -Not enough things exploded. This is really more of a personal thing, but considering how many demolitions, grenade launchers and RPGs they had, they could've (and should have!) leveled a full city. -The "comic relief", College Boy, is neither comical nor relieving. Luckilly he has a total of, what, twenty lines of dialouge and is completely absent for the middle of the movie? Yeah. Go see this movie in an almost-empty theater with some well-humored friends and you'll have one of the best times out possible this year. If you can't laugh and cheer at xXx: State of the Union, then you're just not trying. OVERALL: 4.5/5
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May 8, 2005 08:53
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 08:41 |
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I hated this film so much. I didn't expect to like it much, but at the same time I didn't expect come out of it with such loathing. Me and a friend only went to see it cos we had just signed up for a shiny Unlimited Cinema card and it wasn't going to cost us anything. The first time we went in, a power cut occured that meant the whole building was closed for several hours. We should have taken this a sign that the film was not meant to be seen by human eyes. Unfortunately we returned later after much drinking, and the film began. The drinking couldn't help us enjoy the film at all however, and we both walked out about 50 minutes into the film, disgusted with what we had seen. Why Sammy? Why Dafoe? Why this film? Pros:Umm..... Cons: Everything. 1/5
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May 31, 2005 14:47
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