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Directed by: Mike Bigelow Starring: Rob Schneider, Eddie Griffin, Hanna Verboom Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo was the worst film (if you could call it that) it has ever been my misfortune to witness. It was a torrent of comedy cliches cycled in a completely unfunny, and extremely predictable manner. From the opening scene, it is apparent that it will be a monontony of miserably executed comic ploys. It was as if the directors had seen the GBS thread about unfunny comedy cliches and worked as hard as possible to incorporate every possible old, tired, trite, and overused scene possible. On top of that, you are out eight bucks that you could have used to buy cyanide to kill yourself and spare yourself a horrible fate. Like most of Rob Schneider's movies, it is based off of slapstick humor, most of it physical. As well the same jokes are used repeatedly to the point that you would rather go deaf than hear the joke again. Yes, we get it; asians have small penises. Make one joke and give it a rest. Steer clear of this movie. RATING: 0.5 PROS: It is short CONS: Its is very predictable ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367652/ Pillow Hat fucked around with this message at 05:44 on Aug 17, 2005 |
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Aug 16, 2005 00:54
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:53 |
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I had the terrible misfortune of choosing this movie for a date. Not even out of preference, so much as it was the one movie that niether of us had yet seen - how bad could it be? Imagine watching your grandmother being hit by a tractor-trailer moving in excess of 80 miles per hour. Then having to go pick her up and take her to the morgue. The entire experience leaves you emotionally drained, scarred, broken, and completely callow. Most of the people in the theater left before we did. Gratuitously over played and over developed sophomoric humor pervades the entire film. From the hundreds of dick jokes to the even more offensive line of physical deformities that Deuce's new lady callers host. A woman with a phalus for a nose to a woman with a throat hole spitting wine all over a crowd of people - not a moment of this film was worth my money. Maybe one or two moments of this horrendously short "film" made me chuckle, probably in contrast to the other poor jokes played thus far. Enjoying even those were hard given the terrible job in editing, shooting, setting music and continuity - everything was off. Please take my advice - don't watch this movie - for the life of you and in the name of all things you hold sacred - do NOT watch this movie.
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Aug 16, 2005 01:53
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I fail to see how anyone could approach this movie not expecting a cornucopia of dick jokes, slapstick and physical comedy, gay jokes, and painful acting on Schneider's part. That said, if you're watching this movie, you either got dragged into it by someone, or you have the capacity to switch off your brain for 90 minutes. This movie is exactly what you think it is, in every way, and it really doesn't deny that. Pros:
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I'll rate it 2.5/5 since it's exactly what I expected, and wasn't that awful, like Stealth. Honestly, it's more or less par for average comedy movies. IRQ fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Aug 24, 2005 |
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Aug 16, 2005 07:54
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HaHa! Asians have little penises! HaHa! Asians have little penises! HaHa! Asians have little penises! Ok, there. That's the movie. Voted .5/5 The only reason it doesnt get a zero is because I cant, and because Norm Macdonald is in it and I  norm.
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Aug 16, 2005 09:01
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The first movie was funny, I'll give it that. This one was atrocious. Basically, it's just 76 minutes of "LOL EUROPE LOL GAY LOL PENIS LOL." Norm Macdonald was good as an Irish gigolo, but not even that can save it from doom. This movie is further proof that Rob Schneider will take any offer for any role in any movie. I can just imagine him accepting the title role in "The Sensitive Naked Man: The Movie." And I can easily predict how that movie will turn out. Give me "Eurotrip" any day. At least that movie had some hilarious moments. PROS: It's short, and Norm Macdonald's role did give me a good chuckle. CONS: Almost every single joke in this movie was already made before. And they were all executed better than they were here. Rating: 0.5/5
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Aug 18, 2005 22:19
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I have a test for you. It's a surefire way to determine whether or not you should see Rob Scnieder's latest disasterpiece, "Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo." Ready? Get up and lock the door. Now drop your drawers and look down. If what you see doesn't make you laugh for ninety minutes straight then congratulations, you have just given yourself a perfect excuse not to see this movie. And if you did manage to laugh for that long, just stay home and chuckle at your genitals for nintey minutes. You'll definitely have a lot more fun than you would at this movie. Granted, I know you're not supposed to expect much from Rob "I Can Only Make Movies About Wacky Sexual Situations" Schnieder, but come on! There's enough joke recycling here to put Austin Powers to shame. Every single bit in this movie is either something you've seen before, or something you never wanted to see. Oh wow, a crunked out boat! Nobody has given any vehicle a pimped out makeover before in the history of cinema! Asians have small penises? Why the hell haven't the writers from "The Simpsons" capitalized on that one yet? Seriously, Ebert put it best when he said "(this) movie sucks." Do not see it. 0.5/5 OMG JC a Bomb! fucked around with this message at 07:23 on Aug 20, 2005 |
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Aug 20, 2005 07:20
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:53 |
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quote:IRQ came out of the closet to say: .5
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Aug 21, 2005 22:04
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