Vote For Rory - How SAS Destroyed the Sanctity of the NHL All-Star Game

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Vote For Rory - How SAS Destroyed the Sanctity of the NHL All-Star Game

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lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

I figured this should probably get its own thread at this point.

For those who don't know, the NHL has opened up fan voting for the all-star game this year, and we want to mobilize a huge effort to get a certain Rory Fitzpatrick into the game. Rory's grit, determination, and career -50 rating are a benchmark that all young hockey players should strive for.

VOTE HERE FOR RORY

The easiest way to do this is to open it up in a tab or something, fill out the ballot, hit back, hit F5, and then re-enter the security word and keep going with it. You should also mix up which Western conference dmen you vote for, and try not to vote for Lidstrom, Niedermayer, or Pronger - they'll have enough votes and only 2 dmen can make it in. Some popular choices to vote for are Liles, Hannan, and Ohlund, but we really need to mix it up.

voteforrory.com - spread the word.

What started as a bizarre idea I had at 2 AM last night has turned into about 15 pages on HFBoards, a wikipedia entry, a facebook and myspace group, and probably half of the seperate NHL boards are on board with this idea. We're also trying to get it to a media outlet or two to gain some publicity.

With your help, we can achieve the most amazing thing in the entire world...Rory Fitzpatrick taking the ice for the Western Conference in the 2007 All-Star game.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 02:16

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 07:45

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

dcsmrgun posted:

Hmm, I don't know.. What's his stance on stem cell research?

I don't know, but he's all for aborting odd man rushes.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 02:31

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Hand Knit posted:

Does simply hitting backspace and then submit again not work?

Consensus is that you have to refresh it and generate a new security image.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 02:48

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Loser posted:

The Vote for Rory campaign has hit Wikipedia. Check out section four of Rory's page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rory_Fitzpatrick

The only problem I see with that is that it gives credit for the craze to HF Boards and not SA. Or are we trying to remain behind the scenes in all of this for some reason?

It started here, but HFboards has taken it to an insane level. I think we should just sit back on this one.

By the way, I know how good you are with graphics...if you want to make something for the Rory site...well, you should.

lecherousjester fucked around with this message at 04:14 on Nov 20, 2006

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 04:12

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

As far as the slogan...someone on facebook mentioned "Rory Does Dallas", which I quite like.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 04:16

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Loser posted:

BTW, I think not voting for the unknown guys is the way to go. Pronger, Lidstrom etc. are going to get in anyway, so they're not going to be competing against Rory for votes. It's guys like Liles and Hannan that are taking votes away from Rory. Throw you votes to the guys that you know are going to be in one way or another.

But the problem is that I'm pretty sure Rory has to come in 1st or 2nd among Western Conference defensemen. The way I see it, we should try to distribute the other votes as evenly as possible, using the big 3 of Lidstrom, Niedermayer, and Pronger as kind of last options.

If you vote 100 times, it'd be a good idea to do something like Liles - 30, Hannan - 30, Regehr - 30, Visnovsky - 20, Ohlund - 20, Schneider - 20, Phaneuf - 15, Blake - 15, etc.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 04:24

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Hand Knit posted:

Should we crosspost in GBS? That would probably be good for simple vote volume.

I asked sba and he hasn't said anything yet so I'm guessing it's probably not a good idea. I'll just wait to hear some confirmation from a mod or admin before I do it.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2006 13:04

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Mike Works posted:

this could be like the canadian version of FIRE MILLEN

god i hope voting is still going on in early december

Voting runs until January 2nd or something.

# ¿ Nov 21, 2006 06:07

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

The Eastern conference votes came out today, and I guess the Western conference votes are coming out tomorrow.

So far Crobsy is winning with 83,000 votes. By the look of things, almost 200,000 ballots have been cast so far, but it's hard to tell when you account for people who haven't written in anyone.

Tomorrow is a big day, no matter what happens.

If Rory shows up near the top, it's going to be amazing.

If Rory shows up near the bottom, but still on the list...we know we have a bunch of work to do.

If Rory doesn't show up at all, we declare jihad on the NHL.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 01:14

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

I've turned my living room into a sweatshop and made my little brothers work for the cause.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 02:33

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Mike Works posted:

i'm honestly a little giddy to see the results so far for western polling... anyone know what time in the day they should be announced?

The AP wire was a little after 5PM today for the Eastern Conference.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 03:28

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Rory on youtube - vote 5 please

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 04:07

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Well, I'm guessing it was BeyondRepair that suggested it, but Graham Perkins from McKeen's just contacted me and hopefully we'll be getting a story up soon.

Go Rory Media Train, GO!

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 05:19

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Updated the site. I'm furious with this, and I'm going to get an explanation.

The phone number for the NHL offices is 1-212-789-2000.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 18:19

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

ItalicSquirrel posted:

Amidst all the up-Rory (lol) nobody has mentioned that two Blackhawks are on the voting and that completely loving boggles my mind.

Who are these people voting for Havlat? Not that I disagree with them - just nobody goes to Hawks games, so there has to be some other group...

I've probably thrown in close to 1000 for Havlat and the Sedin's.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2006 18:24

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

I think I was just on 91.3 The Zone in Victoria.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2006 00:46

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Well, I talked to the guy, but I don't think it's on the air yet.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2006 00:52

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

https://www.thezone.fm

I can't access the stream though

# ¿ Nov 23, 2006 00:53

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Well I guess I was on and sounded like a human being, but oh well...the message is all that matters.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2006 00:57

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

So I'm going to be on FAN 590 in Toronto at 10:40 AM tomorrow.

Whee, this thing might just be picking up steam...

# ¿ Nov 28, 2006 02:13

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Hand Knit posted:

Nice, how do you pull that one off?

Someone on HFBoards set it up.

I'm mad nervous, but hopefully I'll be alright.

# ¿ Nov 28, 2006 03:22

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Hand Knit posted:

Just maybe that is sending the wrong message?

We need some credibility and playing the SA type joke angle isn't the way to get it.

# ¿ Nov 29, 2006 00:26

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

sba posted:

It made Deadspin today.

It's getting too much publicity now for the NHL to ignore it.

(lech, throw some google ads up on that website and make some coin while you can)

I did...they're on the bottom, and I've only made like $8 so far. Sucks, because I wanted to get enough to print up a ton of Rory stickers or something.

# ¿ Nov 29, 2006 22:25

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

The only person to answer the voicemails I've left for the NHL was Jamey Horan. He just called me back and I requested a full list of votes to be posted on the NHL site as many fans are starting to be very wary of the legitimacy of the results. I mentioned Mathieu Schneider and Rory, and gave him a rundown of how many people and how many media outlets knew about Rory and the coverup.

He said he'd talk to some people and see what he can do. Not the greatest conversation in the world, but whatever.

# ¿ Nov 29, 2006 22:47

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

UPDATE : RORY IS ON THE LIST! I REPEAT, RORY IS ON THE LIST

We have a huge mountain to climb, but this is HUGE.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2006 00:12

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

The Roadwarrior posted:

Is voting 50 times in a row pointless? Is there a daily limit?

From what we can tell, no.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2006 01:11

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

The canucks forum is a clusterfuck. Sometimes I get a bit frustrated with HFboards (because being here, you get used to a better breed of poster), but it's still a billion times better than that piece of poo poo Canucks board.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2006 02:14

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

If anyone has pics of this awesomeness (the t-shirts), I will pay you in sexual favors.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2006 23:15

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

doubledown posted:

i think it's imperative that one of these shirts gets sent to you.

I was going to make my own this weekend with t-shirt transfers.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2006 23:39

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

From HFBoards :

Canuck quotes from the TEAM 1040:

Naslund: "Well I think it's pretty funny. Especially when you hear him [Rory] talk about it. He's just as surprised as the rest of us. But it's nice. Pretty funny.

Morrison: "Yea I think it's pretty cool. He has my full support. I mean I haven't actually physically sat down and voted, still need to do that, but I'm talking morally, He has all my support"

Luongo: "Yea I've got to get back to my room sit down and keep voting. I voted quite a few times earlier and so I got to get back on the computer now. It's cool"

# ¿ Dec 1, 2006 23:51

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

sba posted:

So now that Rory is ok with it, lech needs to give proper credit to SAS instead of HFBoards !!

We already talked about this sir :\

I told Greg Wyshynski from the 4th period that it started on SAS. If I went out and said it started on SAS, everyone on HFBoards would lynch me and they'd stop voting for Rory (and calling me The Creator).

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 00:24

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

sba posted:

we'll rest knowing that it was actually born here

Do you really want a bunch of people from "the public" to flock here and be like

HAY GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT RORY FITZPATRICK THIS IS SO loving FUNNY IT MAKES ME WANT TO MERGE WITHOUT LOOKING LOL FAMILY GUY REFERENCE LOL
____________________________________
ALEXANDRE BURROWS IS THE BEST PLAYER EVER
***###***TOMMI SANTALA FAN CLUB***###***

AlexandreBurrows4Pres posted:

HAY GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT RORY FITZPATRICK THIS IS SO loving FUNNY IT MAKES ME WANT TO MERGE WITHOUT LOOKING LOL FAMILY GUY REFERENCE LOL
____________________________________
ALEXANDRE BURROWS IS THE BEST PLAYER EVER
***###***TOMMI SANTALA FAN CLUB***###***

QFT LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!

lecherousjester fucked around with this message at 00:35 on Dec 2, 2006

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 00:33

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

God drat, I need one of these lol.

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 02:08

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

http://www.canucks.com/images/audiofile06/dec0106/fitzpatrick.mp3

Audio of interview with Rory!

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 02:31

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

HPL posted:

Poor Rory. He'd be so if he knew why we started this whole thing in the first place.

No one who makes $500,000 a year to play 7 minutes a night is

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 02:38

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

My mom read the article on canucks.com and at the end she said "who's Fitzpatrick???"

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 02:52

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

I guess it just got 3 minutes of time on sportsnet.

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 03:53

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

da keebsta knicca posted:

I hope not.

Think of the RENEWED CONFIDENCE he'll have!

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 04:31

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

Mr. Ryan Lambert posted:

I don't know if i like Rory's lack of enthusiasm

we're getting that motherfucker in. we're doing it and that's that

It's called modesty. When you've had a storied career like Rory, you learn to be modest about your abilities/achievements.

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 06:35

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 07:45

lecherousjester: Jul 17, 2003; Creating the illusion of offense since 1999

There you go guys, here's the credit for SAS

http://thefourthperiod.com/columnists/wyshynski.html

# ¿ Dec 2, 2006 23:22

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Vote For Rory - How SAS Destroyed the Sanctity of the NHL All-Star Game

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