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Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!
Some of these are really funny ideas, but would obviously be quite painful for your unfortunate buddy. The best serious answer is to go the hospital.

But do this before you go:

Clockwork Sputnik posted:

draw a new mouth and goatee on it for him, and post pictures
The hospital staff will get a kick out of it, too.

vvv Try this first. vvv

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Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!

teamgod posted:

You call that a goatee? Is your friend just coming into puberty?

Yes. Probably not.

Do realize that much of the hair is embedded in the plaster, so you're not seeing all of it.