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Okkervil River
Nov 19, 2007

by Livestock


Let me tell you, SomethingAwful. I know I'm a new member here, but I've been surfing these forums since I was a young child. The first time I stumbled upon General Bullshit was when I was a mere 15 year-old child, so influential and innocent. Now I am 18 years old, attending a major university.

I never thought I would be a drinker, but I am SOOO drunk right now. DARE didn't do poo poo for me. BUt anyways, I just want to talk to you guys about this, because I don't want to ruin my friends emotions with my own emotional baggage.

... ANd let me tell you this much. This world is a shallow, shallow place. I'm not the ugliest looking person in the world, but I'm about 60 lbs overweight. Since I've arrived in college, I've managed to lose about 15 lbs, and I'm still planning to go strong and lose more. But.. What I've noticed is this: it doesn't matter how your personality is or what. All that truly matters is how you look. Sure, if you're ugly and have a good personality, people will accept your presence and talk to you and joke with you. People do that with me. But for people to TRULY love you, you gotta look at least somewhat good... At least as good as they do. I get along with people, and I have friends, and I go out to socialize all the time.. almost every night, in fact. But these people that I talk to.. I just hang out with them but I don't KNOW them and they don't KNOW me, and they don't give an effort to know me because I'm lacking in looks and style... THe world is so shallow. I have this friend who looks good, and although this person's personality is kind of absent, because this person looks good.. this person is constantly surrounded by people.

I just want to know that what I'm feeling is accurate. Maybe it's just the university I go to. It's a public state university with about 16000 people. But people are.. just.. so... shallow. It's so wrong. does anyone feel the way I do, at times? I don't care if you think I'm being a enjoyable human being.... I just feel so much pain.

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

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Mr. Adenosine
Oct 14, 2004

Mmmmmm....How do you get them so soft? Hehehe!


Yill Kourself

10000lbsofbananas
Jan 3, 2005

Not for consumption.

haha

Okkervil River
Nov 19, 2007

by Livestock


Mr. Adenosine posted:

Yill Kourself

i'm not ready to die just yet.

i love you. gently caress you if you think i'm lying. but i really do.

Blue Lander
Oct 19, 2006

If you want to know me, watch how I dance.

Not even DARE could save you...

Protogeometric
Jun 25, 2006

LETS ARGUE ABOUT FUCKING WEATHER! DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO CONTRIBUTE RATHER THAN NOTHING!?

Okkervil River posted:

but I am SOOO drunk right now.

You're also stupid as a jar of mayonnaise and about to become more depressed. YAY

Mr. Adenosine
Oct 14, 2004

Mmmmmm....How do you get them so soft? Hehehe!


Okkervil River posted:

i'm not ready to die just yet.

i love you. gently caress you if you think i'm lying. but i really do.

Kill yourself

Furnok Dorn
Mar 30, 2004
SOCIALLY WORTHLESS SHUT-IN NERD

Okkervil River posted:

i'm not ready to die just yet.

i love you. gently caress you if you think i'm lying. but i really do.

you should cut your arms i hear thats pretty fun

Herr Corrector
Jun 7, 2004

In the long run we're all dead.

It doesn't loving matter what we think. You're on borrowed time now, poo poo heap.

TotallyUnoriginal
Oct 15, 2004

Damnit bob

Your friend isn't just better looking, he's cooler than you too.

Tyburn Jigga
Oct 18, 2007
NOT EVERY STUPID GIT WIF A CHOPPA ON 'IZ BELT CAN MAKE A KILLA KAN


listen to rap music.

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

Fundamentals as sound as the WNBA

Your college sure must suck, my freshman year was such an accepting awesome time for pretty much everyone no matter how introverted and depressed a person could be at times. People just went out of their way to be inclusive.

jollygrinch
Apr 16, 2004

Anesthesia. Mona Lisa. I've got a little gun, here comes oblivion.

Yeah, Eugene will do that to you. Leave.

Oncogene
Jan 27, 2006

You like the man on the Kool-Aid pack. How you break your back like that?


Stop in the name of the law!

dorquemada
Dec 22, 2001

Goddamn Textual Tyrannosaurus

They're not shallow. You're fat and you suck, and your personality really is rather terrible.

Okkervil River
Nov 19, 2007

by Livestock


you know what? I was secretly hoping for someone to relate to...
But as I read your HARSH replies, I gotta say....
This is EXACTLY what i need. I need tough love. I need people to tell me I'm a pathetic piece of poo poo and I need to suck it up and DO something about my situation... I'm not sure exactly what. But I'm finally feeling... Brave. I don't feel as depressed. I love you all. xoxo.

Kuroneko
Jun 23, 2004
Black Cat

So in three years you forgot the rules saying don't post drunk?

EDIT: To fit in, lose some weight, fatso, your mom hates you and drinks herself to sleep at night because of how your turned out, you fat slob, etc etc

Onosy
Oct 2, 2002

I owe wtfd00d 10 bux lol~!!1

Drink more and buy a prostitute. She'll love you long time, man.

Curiouser
Aug 1, 2007

YOU WILL ELECT OBAMA OR I'LL MAKE YOU ALL SORRY


Well, just as long as it's everyone else's fault but yours, you'll never have to change. Isn't that nice?

dichloroisocyanuric
Aug 13, 2007

They look like monsters to you?


I read: "I can't get a girlfriend because I'm fat "

fake-edit: by the way, gently caress them if they don't like you

MeaningOfLife
Nov 30, 2001

This forum is really funny! No, really!



only the river stared back :,(

Tyburn Jigga
Oct 18, 2007
NOT EVERY STUPID GIT WIF A CHOPPA ON 'IZ BELT CAN MAKE A KILLA KAN


also become a furry. a rapping furry.

yes.

jollygrinch
Apr 16, 2004

Anesthesia. Mona Lisa. I've got a little gun, here comes oblivion.

Wait a minute, the Ducks lost today. Just find someone already in the process of committing suicide and see if you can join in.

Mouse Dresser
Sep 3, 2002

Only science can make the Connections

Sure man, that all sounds well and good. But really, what we want to know is are you hot or not?

be0tch
Apr 12, 2003



Next time, get drunk by sucking semen out of a whale's big ocean cock.

SilverHorse
May 16, 2004

You don't fuck with a horse.

drat Livestock, you're quick.

You would think someone lurking for three years would know better than to post drunk.

Get a load of me
Jan 27, 2006

by Fistgrrl


ahahahaha you're going to be so embarrassed about this in the morning

if you're really down about this you could watch that one south park (ugh) episode that just came out and feel validated

if it cheers you up a bit, if you're as nice and likable as you say you are, you're probably gonna marry an average looking girl after she gets tired of hot guys just using her for rear end in college, she may or may not cheat on you though

just strive to be a better person, the cards may be stacked against you for getting some but at least people will say nice things about you at your funeral

Buckwheat Sings
Feb 9, 2005


Stop going to parties and start getting involved in an art club or whatever the gently caress you're interested in. Or hell, get a part-time job or go to church for some jesus tail. In reality people have a small amount of true friends and large amount of 'friends'.

I'm just telling you now before it's too late.

HeroinAllstar
Sep 16, 2007

by Ozma


Maybe if you did less napping you'd be more popular, fag.

Okkervil River's SA profile posted:

Interests: music, food, taking naps

You pretty much prove that you're a lazy and obese, pathetic piece of poo poo. Nobody likes you because you're fat and you most likely LACK any redeeming skills or social poise. There's plenty of fat dudes who are popular because they're actually cool people. You, as judging by your post, are just a boring and lonely slob completely delusional to the fact that people don't like you because you suck, not because you're fat.

Livestock
Jan 22, 2001

TOO SEXY FOR DEMOCRACY


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tallkidwithglasses
Feb 7, 2006

have you got any milk chocolate people? about three inches high?

you're not just drunk and depressed.

you're fat and a virgin and drunk and depressed.

let that sink in a while.

BlackRider
Dec 28, 2004


thank you livestock

Moof
May 19, 2003

the horror, the horror

GODDAMNIT BORUFF

Kuroneko
Jun 23, 2004
Black Cat

Oh gently caress yes Livestock

Furnok Dorn
Mar 30, 2004
SOCIALLY WORTHLESS SHUT-IN NERD

livestock where do you get all these midis from

butterthatbacon
Sep 1, 2006

mmmmm.

Haha, and you guys lost today!

But seriously, don't come to corvallis.

HeroinAllstar
Sep 16, 2007

by Ozma


well that was quick.

Puddles
Nov 25, 2005
HAI ^^

hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha

Curiouser
Aug 1, 2007

YOU WILL ELECT OBAMA OR I'LL MAKE YOU ALL SORRY


Will you marry me Livestock check one please:

Y []
N []

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photo kiosk of life
Aug 31, 2004

Not the best role model.

I can't see what he's depressed about now

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