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Does anyone else hear Office 07 referred to as "Vista"?
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| # ¿ Aug 29, 2008 18:02 |
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| # ¿ May 21, 2013 17:43 |
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mono posted:Or "the hard drive". "No wonder your computer is running slow. That wasn't dust, it was a collection of nano-processors. There's barely enough left to run your mainframe now. You just vacuumed out $1000 worth of techonology!" And you know they would believe every word you said, because gotly posted:Computers are just magical mystery machines!
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| # ¿ Aug 29, 2008 21:16 |
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Varvs posted:Me: "so whats the problem youre having?" I have the opposite problem. Nearly everyone who calls will tell me their diagnosis. I pick up the phone and its: "Drighton, I think the internet/network/email/server is down, can you reboot it?" but it just turns out that their laptop battery is dead. People tell me something is "down" so much the word is starting to sound like nonsense. DAAOOOOOUUUUWWWWNNN  .edit: On a different note, I need to find a better way to manage these users' problems. Luckily the three remote offices have no choice, but most people at corporate do not use the help desk system. I've had someone wait at my door while I was clearly talking to another user on my desk phone, Dell on my cellphone, and trying to remove Antivirus XP 2009 (again) from a user's laptop. I say "Send me an email" but he starts in with "When you get a chance, can you..." as if I'm going to remember. But nothing tops the VP of Sales shouting my name from downstairs because I wasn't in my office. He couldn't print. Drighton fucked around with this message at Nov 26, 2008 around 17:02 |
| # ¿ Nov 26, 2008 16:44 |
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Hey Drighton, can you stop working on that long To-Do list of yours? I've got this problem that I've been trying to fix without bothering you since I know your busy but after everything I've tried the tech support guy I finally called has given up and said I should ask you. Sure, what's another interruption. *Walks to desk* Show me what you're trying to do. *Works perfectly on the first try*  What did you do? Thanks!*Walks back to office to continue work* Hey Drighton, can you drop everything you're doing and help me? My computer is broken.... I swear I've got a magic touch. Not even a touch, just a presence that terrifies/inspires workstations to be on their best behavior.
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| # ¿ Dec 17, 2008 21:02 |
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So many ways to pull the Nick Burns MOVE! maneuver without even being in the same room. It's wonderful, isn't it?
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| # ¿ Dec 19, 2008 21:26 |
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I'm curious, does anyone use the keypad for anything other a numberpad? I think 19 or 20 years ago I used it to play some DOS game that came with a plastic numpad overlay that showed what keys to use. I just don't see why Num Lock isn't always enabled.
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| # ¿ Dec 24, 2008 20:21 |
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Also sympathizing with the personal cell issue. I had voicemails on my company phone, my personal phone, and my desk phone, in addition to an email sent to the help desk (only after they called) cc'd to my inbox plus the forwarded copy I'd get from the help desk mailbox. For the personal phone, I just reset my voicemail and neglected to set it up. Shame I can't do that with the company phone, though. I've been trying to get a new one for a while now, so I can forward unanswered calls to my office phone and have all voicemails in one place. I had a cheaper phone that had this option, and I could even put it on a schedule! I hate the Motorola Q. I hate phones period. I can't stand talking on phones. Trying to get them to use the help desk is just as irritating.
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| # ¿ Dec 30, 2008 17:13 |
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I don't expect anyone to know what a caret is, but come on, slash and backslash is matter a common sense. I even tell them where to find the backslash and they still throw a slash in there. 
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| # ¿ Jan 2, 2009 15:50 |
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Hehe. I think I hit a nerve.  krylex posted:If they mentioned they didn't understand I would tell them to look at the top part. It never occurred to me that they could be using the bottom part. The way the written english flows (top to bottom, left to right) it should just make sense that the back slash the opposite way to the direction a word or sentence is read. Drighton fucked around with this message at Jan 2, 2009 around 16:56 |
| # ¿ Jan 2, 2009 16:51 |
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^^^^ I love you guys.
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| # ¿ Jan 26, 2009 16:53 |
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mono posted:This just reminded me of: And this reminded me of something unrelated, but software related: Debit Card readers. Select Debit, enter your PIN, confirm purchase. Right? But then they throw in "Would you like cash back?" and you end up in a different menu because you said "Yes, I want to spend $9." "Would you like to donate $1 to charity?" "Why yes, I need cash back... what?" They can just keep adding questions to confuse the poo poo out of you. But it doesn't stop there. They move the buttons around on you too. One store has a green OK button and a red Cancel button. The next store has the positions of the buttons swapped. The next store is all touch screen and you cancel the transaction after you enter your PIN instead of pressing Enter. Did you make a mistake on your PIN? Do you press the yellow arrow, the clear, or cancel? Maybe you go to press the backspace but that button is so tiny you fatfinger the cancel button on the touchscreen. Not rage-worthy, but irritating since I use my debit card a lot. They should standardize those things.
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| # ¿ Feb 19, 2009 22:48 |
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Mr_Person posted:Run the card as credit instead to skip all of the nonsense. Sometimes you're charged to do that. And that's like paying the $2 ATM fee when you could buy a pack of gum and get your cash back from a grocery store.
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| # ¿ Feb 20, 2009 01:37 |
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Fat Dallas posted:What about the end users who interpret the cached address list in Outlook as their "address book", then bitch at you for loosing their address after upgrading their systems. Then, after you have a minor heart attack, you have to explain to them the difference between the two and how to properly apply logic in the future. I get an email from the same user every time a new employee is added. "New employee is not in my address book!" Every fuckin time. I don't know how to explain it to him anymore. This last time I just replied with a screenshot of the employee's name in the global address list.
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| # ¿ Mar 11, 2009 14:20 |
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^^^ Yes, but typing midelne@company.com is sooo much harder than just pressing M.Fat Dallas posted:However, there is still a very big part of me that just wants to tell the user to use the computer the way it was intended, with the address book, and make everyone's life easier already... It's like a disease. For some reason they are more willing to learn from their own kind and it spreads amongst them so fast:  "You just do this and this and that's how I do it."  "Oh cool, thanks for showing me." "What, no, you want to do it like this to avoid problems in the future." "But if I do it that way I have to click three times. My way, I only click two times. I'll do it my way and deal with the problem when it occurs." "Hey, problem occurred, can you deal with it?" "Us too!"
Drighton fucked around with this message at Mar 11, 2009 around 14:51 |
| # ¿ Mar 11, 2009 14:48 |
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Once again, I'm conflicted about putting this in the poo poo thread or the Tickets thread. I'm pissed so I guess it goes here: Call 1, Day 1: "Hi, it's office manager from remote office. We're having some trouble with our phones but their still working." , "Okay, swamped, blah blah, low priority, blah blah, on the list." Call 2, Day 2: "Hi, office manager again, still having trouble with the phones." , "Blah blah, on the list, blah blah, very busy, when I can." Email 1, Day 3: "Just a reminder about our phones." Email 2, Day 4: "Regional director here, we need to get these phones fixed." , "New office building, three new sister companies started at the same time, all ordered new laptops that I have to stage, plus I have all the little poo poo to do in the office. I'll get to it, be happy your phones are working." Email 3, Day 5: "To VPs and Supervisor, we can't get ahold of Drighton and every time we email or call we can't get an immediate response. Could you help?" , "Drighton, could you make this phone issue a priority and call remote office. Thanks, Supervisor." "Hey it's Drighton, I've dropped everything to work on your pressing, high priority phone issue. Sorry it's taken so long, but I've been busy, as I've explained. Could you give me more details about the problem?" "The date and time are blinking incorrectly on the phones and we can't tell what time it is." I am just stupefied right now. This poo poo happens too often. I could write forever, but I'll spare the rant. Drighton fucked around with this message at Mar 24, 2009 around 15:40 |
| # ¿ Mar 24, 2009 15:36 |
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I hate phones so much. I don't like them ringing, I don't like talking on them, I don't like having to retrieve voicemails... I megaloathe everything about them. What is it about a phone call that people find more convenient than an email? Hardly anyone uses the help desk system. My users would rather listen to a phone ring for 10 loving minutes than send an email. How loving thick do you have to be to not realize that this means I'M BUSY. So I setup a call queue (now that I have an assistant so they can dial one number to reach either of us) and after a minute of ringing it will kick them to voicemail, which is sent via email to the ticket system they should have used to begin with. I thought I was being clever, forcing them to indirectly create a helpdesk ticket. But as soon as they hear the voicemail, they hang up and call again! Then someone's head pokes in "Hey I've been trying to call you... oh you're on the phone." Give them a quick "No poo poo, really!?" look while I help the current douche with software he didn't tell me he ordered. They lean on my door and wait - the physical equivalent of ringing the phone for 10 minutes. Now a line starts forming out the door. I've got two queues going and no emails. And then after all that ringing and waiting, they ask me how I'm doing. Every time, every day. Some even have follow up questions. I know you don't care what I did this weekend, why are you asking? What is with this fake interest in my personal life, I know this isn't why you called. "Wow, you guys are busy." Tell me how all this is easier than tossing an email my way?
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| # ¿ May 18, 2009 17:12 |
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How bad is your BO that I can still smell you when I open your computer to upgrade the memory long after you've left the company, which was before I even came along? This guy must have gone through multiple computers because it's happened more than once.
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| # ¿ Jun 23, 2009 13:45 |
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Phuzion posted:and these guys are literally leaning against the doors of the elevator, blocking the infrared sensor from letting the door close. What, like they're half on/half off the elevator? They are willingly putting themselves in the position to be a victim of one of everyone's nightmares?
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| # ¿ Aug 31, 2009 17:52 |
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A user reports that a fax machine won't receive. She is always opening tickets for every little thing, many times for no reason. So the first thing I try is sending them a fax, and it works. No surprise. The client sends the faxes again and it works like magic. Ticket closed. She reopens the ticket the same day because the fax machine won't send nor receive now. Now absolutely nothing works. All the settings are correct, phone line is good and answers but nothing is received. I'm watching logs thinking I'm going to drive the three hours out there because I can't think of whatever stupid poo poo they did so I can direct them to fix it. Miraculously, I think to ask her to check the line and it's plugged into the wrong port on the fax machine. Sometime between both tickets, someone decided to move the cable. This poo poo is quite common for that office. edit: She reopened the ticket again because now the callers get a busy signal. Drighton fucked around with this message at Sep 22, 2009 around 22:52 |
| # ¿ Sep 22, 2009 22:49 |
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I don't see these too often, but sometimes you get a real puzzler: I've got incoming emails from multiple companies (the list is only getting bigger) that just disappear. There is no pattern to it, no logs that I can see in exchange or our filter, whitelisted domains still appear to be affected, nothing to indicate where the email went or if it even reached our server. We have 10 domains, which I have an email address for each. Only one group has been complaining of missed emails, everyone else seems to be fine. I added an alias for one of my users and had a client send some test emails to both of us: The client sent identical back to back text only emails, but we got one email and lost the other. Troubleshooting has been difficult without access to an affected email address, but most of what I've tried has been inconclusive - I'm getting nowhere. I can't tell yet if the solution to this problem is going to be one of those or  moments.
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| # ¿ Feb 3, 2010 00:02 |
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Midelne posted:nslookup -querytype=mx youremaildomain.com and make sure you only have MX records pointing to active MTAs for the affected domain. Yeah, I checked on all the MX records already. Using Exchange 2010. Problem was noticed start of January, everything was fine in December. I was surprised when I didn't get that email, since that meant the problem wasn't just with the one domain, which is concerning since no one else but that one group has been complaining. I'm back to checking the spam filter to be absolutely sure nothing is being blocked.
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| # ¿ Feb 3, 2010 14:38 |
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Why do laptops I get back always smell like armpit? You know the smell: you're not quite sure if you forgot to put on deodorant or if someone just brought Taco Bell into the vacinity. I specifically remember assigning a new, fresh out of the box Dell laptop to a guy and 1 to 1 1/2 years later he brings it in for repair and once the heatsink heats up... armpit. But I don't think its just the heatsink. I've opened up these laptops to replace all kinds of parts and the armpit smell is even stronger. Can anyone offer up an explanation that would make sense? So far it's only happened to me with Dells. I haven't been around HPs long enough to know if they're affected too.
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| # ¿ Aug 5, 2010 14:08 |
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"Wow, that idea you had in the shower would do the trick in solving our problem, saving the company money, and making our job simpler. But, it would cause this very insignificant process to stop working and we can't inconvenience the only Executive that uses it, so we'll have to put this on the shelf."
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| # ¿ Aug 12, 2010 14:03 |
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PirateDentist posted:"Well a tactical assault on their servers might work. Destroy the hard disks with explosives. We'd have to have coordinated strikes on all possible regional servers and backups though. It seems possible but it'd be a pretty major undertaking." This reminds me of that story about some biological apocalypse and all the IT people in sealed data centers survived. Now you've got me picturing some kind of stylized anime about IT ninjas throwing CDs through heads and assassinating people with Cat6.
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| # ¿ Aug 20, 2010 13:17 |
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PirateDentist posted:123456 Yeah but don't forget God. System operators love to use God. It's that whole male ego thing.
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| # ¿ Aug 30, 2010 20:57 |
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For this post there is a computer in my car. Traffic is loving confusing sometimes. During the summer, I had a concrete schedule: leave house at 7:25, arrive in parking garrage at 7:55, sitting at desk at 8AM. But suddenly school starts and I'm arriving 30 minutes late. So I adjust my schedule by 30 minutes and STILL manage to arrive 30 minutes late. So I adjust my route to work and leave even earlier, arrive 10 minutes late. The strangest part about traffic is what a major loving difference 10 minutes can make sometimes. I've breezed through areas where I normally run into ball busting traffic and the only thing different is that I left 10 minutes early that morning. Today I left a little early at 6:50. I skipped all the traffic this morning, even when I made a last second change to my route and took the loop (normally a bad idea) there was no bottleneck, everything was fairly smooth, and I'm at the office at 7:30. Now, I'm not one of those impatient drivers. Traffic is just one of those things you deal with. What bothers me the most is that you can't predict it, avoid it, or plan your morning around it. One day you needed to leave 15 minutes early, the next day you could have slept in 45 minutes.
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| # ¿ Sep 2, 2010 13:43 |
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frozenphil posted:Basically, get a motorcycle and lane split like a mofo. Dumb laws are meant to be broken. I've considered, my old man has a Honda he rarely uses (like once or twice a year). But I tend to zombie-drive sometimes, so me riding at this point in my life isn't a good idea.
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| # ¿ Sep 2, 2010 17:08 |
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How about a small complaint. Any other checkbox or radio button in an installer is friendly enough to, most of the time, allow you to just click the text to select the corresponding option, even if its the period to the far bottom-right of the button. But when it comes to those search bars, if you don't click just right in a 4x4 pixel area directly on the checkbox, you can't uncheck the option. And I've even seen them with multiple checkboxes, where if any one is left checked the bar gets installed. The search bars only started annoying me when they started being major dicks about sneaking their software onto a computer, even when you don't want it. Dyscrasia posted:It is starting to seem daily, but NOD32 has been loving up with their updates recently. I love Nod for my home PC, but I've often wondered how it fared in a business environment, or even on a PC where the user manages to get AntiVirus XP 2012 every day. Whats your overall experience and biggest gripes with it? Drighton fucked around with this message at Sep 2, 2010 around 20:51 |
| # ¿ Sep 2, 2010 20:48 |
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So good only for Small Business?
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| # ¿ Sep 2, 2010 21:32 |
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IT Guy posted:Dell: Can you please loving ship the Office 2010 media with your computers, rather than this piece of poo poo paper with a license key on it. Not everyone uses your bloated default image. I found the OEM folder once and copied it to our software folder on the network. I'd tell you where it is, except the installer removes the folder once its finished and I can't remember. Search for the folder OEMOffice14 and burn that to a CD. In fact, I think you can just burn the nested Office14 folder and use that for your Dell installs.
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| # ¿ Sep 9, 2010 19:56 |
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That explains the intercom announcement yesterday from the other company in this building. I'm willing to bet my previous company is dealing with this worm, too. Those dumbass hick users clicked everything.
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| # ¿ Sep 10, 2010 13:56 |
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Just got off the phone with our Dell rep and he was surprisingly transparent about the cost of their hard drives. They have documents that list all the compatible hard drives which from a third party averages $300. Dell gets the same hard drive, puts it's firmware on them (their device will reject it without this firmware apparently), and does some testing. Then they turn around and charge $800-900 for it.  From what I've been reading, it's possible to use third party drives (haven't found out how yet), but if Dell sniffs it out they will refuse to support the device.
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| # ¿ Sep 10, 2010 21:53 |
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enotnert posted:"oh hey $something isn't working, oh you're eating, I'll let you finish" *sits in chair beside your desk and watches you eat* I always wanted to write a reminder of their problem on a post it note with whatever sauce/ketchup/broth/etc when they do that.
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| # ¿ Sep 13, 2010 22:55 |
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Sweevo posted:I think it's just part of the bigger problem where things are designed to last the warranty period then if they break tough poo poo. $3000 TV, 1 year warranty, 13 months later it won't turn on. Meanwhile 5 year old 32" Sony for which I bought the extended warranty is still trucking along. Luckily the non Samsung technician just said "fuckit" when he saw it was a month out of warranty and didn't charge us. Wish I was home so I could have given him a tip or something. It's funny though: any other gadget or product and you don't think twice about calling the manufacturer for help if there is a problem. But when my brother can't get his new DIY computer to boot, it's the last thing on our mind. Granted the first motherboard was more than likely DOA, but if he hadn't given up on the second mobo so quickly we might have found the bad stick o' ram in time to RMA it. Since it's on my mind, is having matching sticks for Dual Channel all that important or is that just marketing to sell the two-packs? Is a dual channel mem config beneficial enough to want to avoid using 3x 2GB sticks? Bro's talking about getting another 4GB and I'm not sure what to recommend.
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| # ¿ Oct 4, 2010 16:04 |
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SynMoo posted:If one more person puts a post-it note directly on one of my monitors, I will rise up and slay them. That used to be a daily thing for me too. Just like those who changed the date on their computer to get to the top of someone's inbox, Post-It's on the monitor is their way of taking a higher priority over your other work. They don't have to worry about whether you got their voicemail, or if their email will get buried amongst all the others. By putting a tangible note on your screen, they feel they are guaranteed to get flash installed on their computer, because you would have to take the note off the screen before you could help anyone else. OR I'm on three phones and two support sessions on my computer. I'm obviously not answering my phone because I'm busy so instead of sending an email, they would walk down to my office and start forming a line at my doorway. Clearly an issue that requires they come retrieve me from my office immediately must be worthy of my attention: "I know you're busy but when you get a chance, my desk phone is an hour behind." I am so glad I don't work there anymore.
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| # ¿ Oct 6, 2010 15:01 |
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Currently installing Server 2003 on an eMachine because our current desktop-turned-server likely has a bad PSU (random shut offs). Almost lost hope while also reading this thread but recovered slightly. I'm not exactly sure where the hold-up is, be he needs to hurry up and get us a number for a system update budget. We shouldn't have to guess what the CFO will feel is acceptable.
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| # ¿ Oct 7, 2010 14:47 |
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Brinner posted:Amen to this. recently (last year or so) every primary school has been given interactive white boards. They have possibly used them once? The novelty of seeing the desktop on a projector wore off and now they are collecting dust showing nothing but teacher emails. poo poo, I assisted a saftey trainer in getting one of these. He was looking for a solution and, trying to be helpful, recalled the smartboards. We looked into it, scheduled a conference call and demonstration, and he got all excited about how the tools will help him teach and make his life easier, which was a little contagious. It sounded like he would actually use the thing, but after buying the board and software and getting it set up, he decided it was too time consuming to create the lessons with the software. All he really needed was a ceiling mounted projector. Instead he is using Powerpoint for basic slides, and WMP to play DVDs on this $15k setup. Although that company makes and spends money hand over fist, so....
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| # ¿ Oct 15, 2010 14:46 |
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Maniaman posted:OEM Wireless Card Utilities. I have to agree, but it comes in handy when we have to do a wireless survey at a site, since they provide more information than Zero Config. You say the floors above and below coordinated with us when we moved in to make sure we don't use the same channels. Well isn't that nice. Lets just look at all the channels this AP is picking up OHWHATTHEFUCK! edit: We had a C-level come to us with a PST file that won't open. Hard drive going bad right where the PST file is located. A PST with years worth of emails from the beginning of the company, and which hadn't been backed up in months. So after my coworker spent a day and a night poking at it with file recovery software, I took over and ran Outlook Recovery Toolbox. After 3 hours the scan finished and then I realized it was running the Demo. In order to activate, I had to restart the program and the scan. No big deal, another 3 hours right? To speed things up I switch the HDD dock from USB to eSATA and run the software on a quad-core, 4GB, Win7 Dell we just got in (instead of my POS 3 year old Vostro). The scan is still running since 5PM Friday. Last I checked, it moved 1% in 10 hours. I'm still reluctant to do anything except wait out the scan. Besides all the time that's already been spent on the scan, I can't decide whether the increase in scan time is due to the change in hardware or because the HDD got worse. I'm leaning toward the latter but, since that requires inaction on my part, the former is still nagging at me. Drighton fucked around with this message at Oct 18, 2010 around 15:32 |
| # ¿ Oct 18, 2010 14:48 |
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mono posted:100% in 3 hours is a lot better than 1% in 10 hours. I'd cancel that and connect it the way you originally had it, although I wouldn't be too optimistic about the drive's health at this point... The problem is I can't tell if the new setup is the cause of the slow recovery, or if it's because the hard drive has gotten worse. The only reason I suspect the setup is because I've heard about and seen evidence of problems with eSATA connections on the Dell E-series laptops in the past. However, if it is the hard drive, I'll have canceled a 72+ hour process to restart it on a slower, older computer and connection. ToxicFrog posted:Take a disk image of that fucker first thing and work from the image - or at least copy the PST off it. There's no point in successfully repairing the PST if the drive it's on shits itself immediately afterwards. That was the first thing we tried. Imaging software shits itself when it gets to the bad sectors, and the file copy fails at the same point too, because the bad sector is right where the PST file is. Another 2% since last night.
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| # ¿ Oct 19, 2010 15:34 |
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| # ¿ May 21, 2013 17:43 |
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We don't have a Linux anything anywhere in the company, unfortunately. At this point I'm not stopping the recovery for anything anyway. He's going again with a temp solution until this poo poo finishes. Maybe he'll get the message this time (who am I kidding), but it's a failure on two fronts: 1) If these emails are this important, he should have been backing them up regularly like he said he would. And 2) when he told the IT manager that he didn't want his computer being backed up over the network, the IT manger should have said OK and did it anyway. Drighton fucked around with this message at Oct 19, 2010 around 16:18 |
| # ¿ Oct 19, 2010 16:13 |
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