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From a couple days ago. It went more like this:evobatman posted:
I probably could have waited more and tried calling back again, but I had the feeling that I would just be routed back to him. It should have been as simple as you made it out to be, yes, but this time it wouldn't be that way and this guy was going to make sure of it.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 13:40 |
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:"Hi. I have a machine that bluescreens. I swapped the memory with another machine. Now that one bluescreens and this one is fine. I swapped it back. Now this one bluescreens and the other one is fine." [note: actual swapping may or may not have occured]
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| # ? May 23, 2013 17:14 |
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thehustler posted:Canford also make a rackmount wine rack. Yes, of course. Hot wine. The wave of the future. (Ew.)
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 14:20 |
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Well, presumably there's a power hookup and it cools the wine, right? Otherwise you're pretty much rackmounting a box.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 14:23 |
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guppy posted:Well, presumably there's a power hookup and it cools the wine, right? Otherwise you're pretty much rackmounting a box. From what I could tell, it's just a box. It's only 39 Pounds, which tells me it has nothing on it that'll cool it.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 14:24 |
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Arsten posted:From what I could tell, it's just a box. It's only 39 Pounds, which tells me it has nothing on it that'll cool it. Just means you need to up the cooling in your datacenter.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 15:40 |
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One of our clients had been having problems with her mail host, so we moved her to a hosted Exchange account. I did a remote session on her system yesterday to configure Outlook and import her mail from the old account into Exchange. She had to run to a meeting during this, and told me she'd call me back around 3 when she was done. I finish setting up Outlook, and wait for her to call so I can get her Blackberry going as well since I didn't have any of her login info. 3:00 comes and goes, and so does 5:00. I come in this morning and she's calling me yelling about how she's not getting her "super important time-sensitive" email on her Blackberry. I calmly explained to her that she was supposed to call me after her meeting, at which point I would have taken care of this. I asked her for her Blackberry web account info. "But I don't even know what it is!" she says.  Also, she was bitching about her wireless network connectivity problems at her friend's apartment. Turns out she's hijacking the neighbor's open network, which happens to have an SSID of 'linksys'. So do about 25 other networks that her card can see. I told her that I had no way of making this work reliably. 
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 15:40 |
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CitizenKain posted:Just means you need to up the cooling in your datacenter. "Why is the AC set to 40 F?" "Because the heat from the servers raises the temperature to 55 F, which is perfect for wine storage." 
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 15:46 |
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Just got this email: --- From: (lady who handles all the misc. crap around our office) To: ab0z Subject: download time 6/5/09 Download the time from May 25, 2009 to June 5, 2009 --- You know as much as I do about what this means.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 20:37 |
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Quit bitchin and just download the time man. It's not rocket surgery.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 21:07 |
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Probably means the clock on her PC is wrong and she would like it configured to sync with network time.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 22:07 |
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My first thought was that it has to do with some sort of time clock or time tracking software, like ADP's eTime/HandPunch combo. Glancing at my calendar and seeing that May 25th to June 5th is a full two workweek period further reinforces that suspicion. Now, why she's asking you to download it is a complete mystery.
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 23:02 |
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case title: transistion busy to another companyquote:1. so I called them, and all they needed was some user accounts created because they're switching foodservice contractors next week. and at the end of the call: "I've only been here for half a year, I was going to work on the database over the summer because it's a huge mess but I guess that's the new guy's problem now"
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| # ? Jun 5, 2009 23:30 |
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Haha ok resolution to that one: I replied "What?" to the email. 2 minutes later she came by my desk and explained that she meant to send it to our book keeper. the first 2 letters of my first name are the same as the first 2 in our bookkeeper's last name, so I guess it was just a little oops with autocomplete. So chizad was right.
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| # ? Jun 6, 2009 04:19 |
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Today's ticket of the day:quote:summary: DATAFILES I love having a webform that doesn't do any kind of data validation.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 00:53 |
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Friday's call of the day: The contact person for a client that's about 1.5 hours driving away calls, tells us they have a problem with one of their printers. I get patched through to the end user. He tells me there's a red blinking light on one of their two network printers in a specific part of the company, they don't know what the problem is and it needs to be fixed ASAP. What they already tried: Switching out the two printers they have, with no results(Of course, both have static IPs and are networked) I check the config pages for both printers, ask them which one has the blinking light, and find out in less than a minute that the "broken" printer is out of toner. They hadn't tried replacing that yet, but they had yanked out the toner and shook it a few times to see if that got it going again(I know, this works in some cases) but no dice. So the printer must be broken, and it cannot possibly just be out of toner. I ask them to swap the toner between the two printers, since the second one is barely used and could wait until they get new toner. This takes them 45 minutes. Why? They had to put the printers back in their original position but didn't know which one went where. So they ended up swapping the toner twice between the printers before figuring everything out, and called me again because it didn't work. In the end they had only one hooked up, which was the second printer with its still-full toner cartridge. I asked them to hook the other one up and swap toners, and it started vomiting out all the print tasks sent to it since it ran out. As it turns out, our contact person already told them to just replace the toner since that was the most likely cause of a red blinking light, and ended up getting pretty pissed off at the end user for not doing this before. I was pretty close to just getting in my car and driving over there, but then I'd spend 3 hours just driving for a five minute fix.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 11:05 |
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Smoke posted:I was pretty close to just getting in my car and driving over there, but then I'd spend 3 hours just driving for a five minute fix. How is it that we have robot surgeons that can be operated by a doctor half a world away for delicate brain surgey, but don't have an IT-bot that you can connect to and do this poo poo yourself?
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 11:15 |
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Casao posted:How is it that we have robot surgeons that can be operated by a doctor half a world away for delicate brain surgey, but don't have an IT-bot that you can connect to and do this poo poo yourself?
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 11:55 |
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FronzelNeekburm posted:"Yeah, that stupid robot kept trying to pull out the ink cartridge, and none of my jobs were printing, so I turned it off. And then I put it in the bathroom with the rest of our equipment that isn't working, and I think someone spilled water on it when the toilet overflowed." Built-in tazer to prevent them loving with it. Then again, they'd just unplug it, run down the batteries or find another way to break it. I could totally see that happen at that client's location too. They have an odd talent for breaking poo poo even when they're told to not touch it because they happen to have a printer at home and "it works just the same" there. Also, I'd pay for a system that'd allow me to put a bigass customizable screen and speakers on commonly-abused devices telling users the exact steps to take to fix a problem, complete with helpful pictures.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 12:03 |
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Smoke posted:Built-in tazer to prevent them loving with it. Then again, they'd just unplug it, run down the batteries or find another way to break it.  Click here for the full 772x566 image. The best way would be to eliminate the users alltogether, the same bot could help with that. Last friday one of our users called and said they'd be pulling the power in five minutes, if that was ok with us. Somehow they'd "forgotten" to tell us about this planned upgrade of the elecrical equipment. we told them no. eventhough calling at 14:00 friday afternoon the day before the swedish nationalday (which ment we only worked to 13:00) would be an excellent point for them to see just how important their ups-upgrade was.. good luck getting the ad to start after a sudden loss of power, aswell as the exchange database and their filemaker db.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 12:20 |
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Casao posted:How is it that we have robot surgeons that can be operated by a doctor half a world away for delicate brain surgey, but don't have an IT-bot that you can connect to and do this poo poo yourself?  Oh, that's why we never do anything cool.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 15:28 |
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Ticket came in this morn: "Disable [my bosses] account effective immediately" Layoff days are always pretty exciting.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 16:16 |
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I just had a 20 minute IP Relay chat with someone about some PC work they needed done. It took 20 minutes to get "please email me to discuss this further" across. This is the email I got (in Comic Sans font) quote:Hi, edit: and here's the back and forth emails me: What is the problem you are having? Do you need to have a drive replaced? I'm not sure what you're asking me. In the phonecall, you mentioned 20 PCs. Do they all have the same problem? him: Yeah they have the same problem. me: What problem are they having? him: Hard disk and Processor and Main Board. me: Do you need to replace the hard disk, processor, and main board on 20 PCs? Repair them, upgrade them? I need a little more information. him: Yeah you have to upgrade when you replace the hard disk and main board and the processor me: What kind of hardware is in the computers now? Would you like to replace the RAM or to keep the old RAM? Aside from the 80gb hard drive, what other specifications would you like to have on the processor and motherboard? What speed? What will the PCs be used for, then maybe we can get a better idea of how to upgrade. and then nothing. wtf. angelfoodcakez fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2009 around 19:30 |
| # ? Jun 8, 2009 17:02 |
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Here I'll just download the time to fix his issue.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 17:34 |
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angelfoodcakez posted:and then nothing. wtf. He'll have you on the floor in a month demanding to know why you didn't follow through.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 20:25 |
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coyo7e posted:This is the scary part, because as soon as he received an email lnoger than 15 words, his brain shut down and the "oh, it must be fixed!" light came on in his head. How do we go about getting "wut" recognized as an acceptable request for more information? It's about the only thing I can think of in response to some of these requests. Only 30 new tickets when I came in today, I haven't looked through them all but it might just be the best Monday yet. Edit: I do remember my favorite ticket from the weekend. Someone asked me to provide proof we DIDN'T resend an invoice. That took me 4 or 5 rewrites to adequately explain why it isn't possible to definitively prove we didn't do so. Still waiting for an answer to that one. EVGA Longoria fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2009 around 20:46 |
| # ? Jun 8, 2009 20:29 |
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Casao posted:Edit: I do remember my favorite ticket from the weekend. Someone asked me to provide proof we DIDN'T resend an invoice. That took me 4 or 5 rewrites to adequately explain why it isn't possible to definitively prove we didn't do so. Still waiting for an answer to that one. It's perfectly simple. Clearly the invoice program is like the Dharma Initiative computer from Lost and only
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 21:27 |
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This isn't a regular ticket but I think its pretty funny. We recently added NTT to our list of carriers. Its been about a week and within that time frame we have received about 3 maintenance notices. This one just rolled in today: NTT Customer Outage Notice posted:Hello!
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 23:30 |
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Gelob posted:This isn't a regular ticket but I think its pretty funny. One of my carriers who shall remain nameless does the same thing, and I like it. If they've sent me a notice that they'll be working on something I use even if no downtime is expected, that means I can be prepared in case something does in fact happen. I may not be able to do anything about it, but I'll know what to check first and how much it'll affect my customers.
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| # ? Jun 8, 2009 23:45 |
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I finally have something to share! I set up a cron for a user over a week ago. Two days later I get an email that the cron isn't working, blah blah blah, can you please check to see if it's set up right I'm not getting my reports!!! I have no idea what she's talking about (we do dozens of crons and without specifics I have no idea) and tell her to open a ticket if she's having problems. She waits until today to open the request: "I have submitted a request before, for the cron to run this script, but the request was not completed. Yet the request was closed. Can you please verify with bloobloo@abloo.com that this cron request is complete before you close the request. Last time I wasn't able to get a hold of the person doing the request, when the request wasn't completed. If you need any additional information, please e-mail blehbleh@blah.com" I go double check the cron, it's indeed set up 100% correctly. Not sure why she had to make up poo poo about not being able to talk to me or claiming that the original request wasn't even done, but hey, I'll be nice and maybe take a look at her short perl script and see if there's some small problem I can point out to her. Oh my god. Not only does it look like it was pasted from Word into vi (random spaces and crazy characters everywhere), there are still huge blocks of tutorial comments still in the goddamn thing from whatever site she lifted it off of. But no, hey, it's that dumb sysadmin's fault for setting up my dang cron wrong, right?
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 02:06 |
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scottch posted:Up until a few years ago, Goldman Sachs had their own class A and assigned every device a public IP. Not really insecure since they could do whatever they liked with the firewalls and stuff, but this is how they rolled. And roll they did. The Japanese mothership of my company uses public IP space for EVERYTHING. Including things that are only routable internally at sites that don't have an internet connection; only a leased circuit to another office. Some of the things they use are explicitly NOT routable internally and have to go over an internet link. All of this is in the same public class B. Our static routing table is the stuff of legend, and then we find out that they're doing this with DHCP and one day they reinstalled the server and wiped the leases.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 19:05 |
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xarph posted:The Japanese mothership of my company uses public IP space for EVERYTHING. Including things that are only routable internally at sites that don't have an internet connection; only a leased circuit to another office. Some of the things they use are explicitly NOT routable internally and have to go over an internet link. All of this is in the same public class B. Hahaha, holy poo poo, you win. At least GS was doing it correctly, if in excess.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 19:12 |
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My company's COO decided to play an April Fool's joke on everyone back in April (duh). He sent out the below email and told them that if it doesn't work they should contact IT. My company has about 700 employees across 22 offices around the country, but thankfully it's a very laid back place. Disclaimer: I'm the #2 person in the IT hierarchy and fairly popular so I'm able to get away with this. Email from COO: quote:In an effort to streamline the log on process that is causing much of the network to slow down, [Stupid Vendor] is testing a new “iris scanning” procedure. [My Company] is taking part in the beta test for this new system effective 4/1/09. Instead of logging into [Stupid App] with the usual keyboard strokes, please hold your face approximately 18 inches from the computer screen and wait at least 8 seconds for [Stupid App] to get a fix on your face and scan your iris. Once this is done you should then be automatically signed into [Stupid App]. If this does not work please send an email to [IT] and let them know it did not work as they are collecting data to give to [Stupid Vendor]. Here are the email conversations between me and our users. I didn't edit anything, I swear. E-Mail 1 User: I tried it from the house computer and it did not work. Me: Is it a flat screen or one of those big monitors? Are you wearing glasses? Were you sitting no more than 2 feet from the screen? Did you blink at any time during the login process? – blinking locks out your account. User: Flat screen, sitting less than 2 feet away. Tried with glasses and without glasses. I don’t think that I blinked. Also, I have two sign in processes, one when I click on to [Stupid App] with the white background, and another with the blue background. Which are we supposed to try this with? E-Mail 2 User: yeah right. [Stupid App] knows my face.. are they kidding me Me: It does. It pulled your picture from your [ID] card. It works great. I strongly recommend you try it. User: I just did. it aint working. Me: Did you take off your glasses? They have to be off, otherwise it reflects the lasers from the screen. User: I TOOK MY PANTS OFF AND SHOWED IT MY rear end!!!! IT WORKED.. AMAZING Me: Like I said, it pulled the picture from your [ID] card. It’s not our fault yours has a picture of your rear end on it E-Mail 3 User: is this an april fool’s so we all have our mugs staring at [Stupid App]!!!! Ha Ha. Does this work on my lap top from home? E-Mail 4 User: IT DID NOT WORK! Me: It’s very important that you don’t blink during the process. Please try again. User: NOPE Me: Nope? It’s not important? User: NOPE…….IT DIDN=T WORK! E-Mail 5 User: It is not working, and not won’t let me sign in at all. ME: Blink 5 times very fast while staring at it to reset the password. CTO: If you have a ruler it's important to be exactly 1/8th of an inch away from the screen User: 1/8 or 18 inches. Is this an APRIL Fools Joke because I feel like an idiot doing this? CTO: We think your machine might have been made in Canada and they use the Metric System. Try 45cm E-Mail 5 User: IT dept.- It didn’t log me in automatilcally. Me: You probably locked yourself out. Blink your eyes in the following order to unlock it: Left Eye, Right Eye, Right Eye, Left Eye, Left Eye, Both Eyes. (She called me a few minutes later saying it still wasn't working. I couldn't hold it in. I fell off my chair laughing while she was still on the phone with me. She asked me if it was a joke and through the tears I managed to say "Yes, of course it's a joke" so she replies, "So how do I really do it?") E-Mail 6 User: It didn't work for me ;-( Me: You don’t use [Stupid App]. This procedure is only for [Stupid App]. Please don’t try using it for Email as your Computer may explode. E-Mail 7 User: [IT], I followed the instructions from [COO's] email regards the iris scanning and it did not work for me. Me: Try rubbing the top of the monitor while staring at it. (I walked by his desk later in the day and he stopped me and told me that he actually spent 5 minutes rubbing the top of his monitor. I fell down on the floor right in front of him with tears in my eyes from laughter) E-Mail 8 User: Did not work for me Me: Try looking at your screen sideways and then slowly rotate it from left to right and then back again 4 times. Do not blink during this process. E-Mail 9 User: No it did not work if I was looking at the [Stupid App] sign in screen Great idea! Me: Try sticking your tongue out and moving your head from side to side and then up and down for it to get a full picture of your face. User: Really or are you teasing me? E-Mail 10 User: I just now tried to log on to [Stupid App] for the day. Read the e-mail from [COO] first. Was not sure which log-in was referred to...whether the first log on with log in, pssword, and [office] code, or the one once I reached the [Stupid App] main screen. But tried both in that order. Neither worked. Do I need to do anything else? I'm not in the office today. I'm home working from GoToMyPC. Does that affect it? Me: [Stupid Vendor] and [My Company] are working on a solution for the GoToMyPC users. E-Mail 11 User: We have no idea what we are supposed to do so don't know what to tell you, sorry. Me: What have you tried so far? User: We don't know! We looked at screen but don't know if at right time or what Me: The camera scanner in your monitor is very sensitive so right when the main login screen loads, lean directly into it, count to 5, then lean back out; repeat the process up to 4 times. If that doesn’t work, open your Calendar in Outlook and check what today’s date is. E-Mail 12 User: If we are working from home do we do the same thing or it will only work from the office. Me: It depends on the monitor you have at home. The new ones have the Arc Processor Realization Light Film On Live System (A.P.R.L.F.O.L.S.) in them, which is what makes the entire process work. Check the sticker on the back of your monitor to see if it has APRLFOLS on it. ********** After compiling the list I sent it to the COO who promptly forwarded to the rest of the company.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 19:33 |
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hehe. You guys are dicks.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 19:40 |
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Libal posted:iris poo poo Can I come work with you?
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 20:26 |
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Libal posted:Awesomeness That's great. I'm sure there'll be someone reading this thread who'll get pissy just thinking about the 'waste of company time and resources' or whatever but it's nice to see there are still some large companies (and senior managers) that know how to have a laugh now and again. How did HR take it?
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 21:00 |
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My favorite of today: We lost power and now we can’t connect. Thanks, ..................
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 21:01 |
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Smoke posted:I was pretty close to just getting in my car and driving over there, but then I'd spend 3 hours just driving for a five minute fix. Welcome to about 50% of my onsite work, only that 3 hours is each way. Fortunately the magic phrase "while you're here" means I can still only attend one site per day.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 21:20 |
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Not mine, but one of my co-workers was out at our site today, troubleshooting the network wiht AT&T. He's been out there the entire day, and I gave him a call a few minutes ago to see if he'd be back to sign some paperwork. This site is legendary in that every month we have multiple problems with printers dissapearing and re-appearing, people getting disconnected, dropped network connections, etc. It's an older bulding, so we're convinced it's the cabling, but the state will be arsed if it'll approve closing the place so we can get a contractor out there. Anyway, turns out the two switches we have supporting the place each were configured for a different subnet mask. And had different base IP addresses. God I love working for the state
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 21:27 |
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Libal posted:E-Mail 2 That's the hardest I've laughed at a forum post in a long time. I actually had the old cliche mouth full of coffee and everything. Give that user a promotion, and pat yourself on the back for such a great come back.
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 21:39 |
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| # ? May 23, 2013 17:14 |
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RedMagus posted:Not mine, but one of my co-workers was out at our site today, troubleshooting the network wiht AT&T. He's been out there the entire day, and I gave him a call a few minutes ago to see if he'd be back to sign some paperwork. There's no such thing as "configured for a different subnet mask". It's a switch, all it does is switch. What's a base IP address?
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| # ? Jun 9, 2009 22:40 |
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