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Dear sexually attractive friends, Firstly, if you think I am lovely comedian, please don't vote for me! If you don't laugh then I have not earned your vote! Hi. I'm Ryan Cheshire, and I've entered a lovely blurry 4 minute clip of myself for an online contest for stand up comedians in Canada. (You must be over 18 and Canadian to vote). This contest requires that people register then vote online for their favorite stand up comedians performance clips, for a chance to win national exposure by being on -one- tour show alongside acclaimed comedian Russel Peters and doing a stand up set. My hope is that if you visit the website [ http://www.russellpetersbff.com ] and watch the videos, and that you like mine enough to vote for it (called "Ryan Cheshire standup compilation"), or to at least view it and decide that it sucks platypus poo poo, and/or that I have an overtly "gay" femenine voice, and/or that I should kill myself via icepick to urethra. (To find it, sort by ratings, the video is rated 1.7 and on page 4-5, the ratings don't actually mean anything, you can confirm this by watching the highest rated video). Thanks for reading and possibly voting, if you think I am a stupid rear end in a top hat then please let me know! Also, votes can only get me into the top 10, at which point Russel Peters himself will decide who the winner is! So if he doesn't think I am funny, then I lose anyway! Wow! In the event that I get to briefly be on stage and tell jokes, I will say a phrase of your choosing in front of an audience of tens of thousands of people This phrase can be anything to "I eat bear cock" or "something AWFUL DOT COM," or "Peter Jenkins Auto Repair, Paris TX" The winning phrase will be determined by some type of bandwagon mechanism. Anyway, If nothing else, this thread is so you can view and discuss all the terrible videos that are available on the contest website! Love and sunshine, Ryaf
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 03:59 |
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| # ? Nov 22, 2009 10:48 |
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Do you have a link to your video? I'm not finding a search, and I'm not about to wade through all these pages to find it. edit: I'm an idiot and should probably read your post better. edit2: You should probably get a video with better audio because I don't have a clue what you are saying.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:01 |
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gently caress you
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:01 |
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Are you reading from a script? It seems like you're reading from a script that you're only just looking at for the first time.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:04 |
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I voted for you. Now I want you to say something really loving racist if you win. "Serious note folks, I really dislike touching black people's hands, so no handshakes from those people, ok?" Something like that Hope you win!
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:04 |
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I want you to say "I had to ask the INTERNET for help to win this,"
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:07 |
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The sound is terrible, I can't understand anything you're saying in that video.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:11 |
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"Gelatinous" Working that word into any line is instant comedy.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:11 |
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LA attack posted:I want you to say "I had to ask the INTERNET for help to win this," This, ahahaha.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:12 |
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Can't hear a thing, enjoy losing.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:14 |
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I don't want to register so I didn't watch your video. Are you an actual stand up comedian? As in, have you performed (for people other than your friends)? I'm very new to stand up comedy myself (as in performing my first Yuk Yuk's set TOMORROW oh gently caress) and I sure as hell wouldn't enter a contest without a bunch of sets under my belt. Good luck either way. (Also, I wouldn't trust Russell Peters to judge what is funny, but that's just my own gripe.) Edit: Oh man, I caved and registered. Turns out one of the guys in my program put up his video. It is the worst. "We ate so many chicken wings, we thought we would GROW wings." coolhandsarrah fucked around with this message at Nov 03, 2009 around 04:28 |
| # ? Nov 03, 2009 04:17 |
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I'm not Canadian and therefore can't vote, but some people say a look a bit like Russle Peters... So say: "Spectrox Toxemia Rocks" with your cock out giving the audience a helicopter, and we're good.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 05:00 |
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I'm finding it really hard to hear what you're saying, the recording is horrible and you're drowned out by some guy going "HYUK HYUK HYUK". Gonna go vote for someone else.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 05:30 |
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hellbastard posted:I'm not Canadian and therefore can't vote, but some people say a look a bit like Russle Peters... I am not normally a person that giggles at mental images like this, but there is something rather pleasant to the mind about an awkward comedian struggling to make people laugh having to resort to something like this.
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| # ? Nov 03, 2009 07:11 |
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