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duckmaster
Sep 13, 2004
Mr and Mrs Duck go and stay in a nice hotel.

One night they call room service for some condoms as things are heating up.

The guy arrives and says "do you want me to put it on your bill"

Mr Duck says "what kind of pervert do you think I am?!

QUACK QUACK

Tautologicus posted:

Duckmaster you aren't receiving PM's. Also not so sure about your business idea, the market seems pretty oversaturated and starting from scratch doesn't seem advisable, maybe with existing contacts it would be worthwhile. I wasn't planning to go there to make money anyway, just need enough to live on. I've left better and realer opportunities than that to do what im doing anyway. And business ideas are a dime a dozen, what counts is followthrough.

excuse me I don't think you heard about the santa hats?!


Also I'm not quite sure what this "booking a room" thing is? Surely real men drink all night and sleep in the park?

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MothraAttack
Apr 28, 2008
Yeah, as someone who lived in a majority "hill tribe" (lol most Karen live in the Irrawaddy delta) area I far prefer the food and scenery of southern Thailand. That said, the Mae Hong Son loop area is great for any tourist, and you actually can live comfortably out that way for under $700 a month if you wanna stick around. But if your goal is to live cheaply in northern Thailand, just go to Laos.

Pixelante
Mar 16, 2006

You people will by God act like a team, or at least like people who know each other, or I'll incinerate the bunch of you here and now.
Laos is great if you don't mind being sort of isolated from Western culture a bit more. The government won't let any businesses operate that aren't at least 50% Lao (something like that, anyway) so there are precisely zero Starbucks, 7-11s, or whatever. Closest thing to a mall in Luang Prabang is the Chinese market where they sell the stuff with manufacturing defects. Night Market is one of the better ones in SE Asia for having local stuff (along with the exact same sweatshop stuff you can buy in Phenom Penh) but sizing ain't American. I have an XXL sweatshirt from the market that would be maybe a women's M or snug-fitting L in Canada. I had fun trying to explain that in my home, it gets cold enough that you might want to put a sweatshirt on top of a sweater, so I wanted a big sweatshirt. Lao kids feel cold at 28c and just wear their jackets backwards while on motorcycles because it's practical and keeps the wind out better.

My favourite part of Chiang Mai was the air-conditioned shopping mall, which was the first thing I hit to replace clothes after I left Laos.

Pixelante fucked around with this message at 23:41 on Oct 20, 2014

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
I got my Grandma little red jacket when I lived in China that's an XL I think that fits her really well and she weighs about 90 lbs. Not sure what was going on there, that was up in the north too and there's lots of large Chinese up there.

Shammypants
May 25, 2004

Let me tell you about true luxury.

Which reminds me that I still have to do an eco tour in Nakai-Nam Theun one of these days..

goodness
Jan 3, 2012

When the light turns green, you go. When the light turns red, you stop. But what do you do when the light turns blue with orange and lavender spots?
So my vacation plans this February got rainchecked for a tattoo. But February 2016 is when I will take on Thailand! Thanks for the help people gave. And really thanks for making this thread so hilarious to read.

Senso
Nov 4, 2005

Always working

goodness posted:

So my vacation plans this February got rainchecked for a tattoo. But February 2016 is when I will take on Thailand! Thanks for the help people gave. And really thanks for making this thread so hilarious to read.

But you could get that tattoo done in BKK for 1/10 of what you're gonna pay! It's what all aussie douches do!

Pixelante
Mar 16, 2006

You people will by God act like a team, or at least like people who know each other, or I'll incinerate the bunch of you here and now.
There's a Khmer lesbian masseuse on Pub Street in Siem Reap who will tattoo for super cheap because she wants the practice.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

Senso posted:

But you could get that tattoo done in BKK for 1/10 of what you're gonna pay! It's what all aussie douches do!

Speaking of which, there's apparently a new show on Oz TV called "The Embassay" which is apparently some kind of comedy-drama or something about what the Aus embassay in Thailand has to deal with on an ongoing basis. I can't really imagine having to do that loving job.

"So you drank eight bottles of Chang, found the only moto taxi driver that was around, threw him off his bike and then rode his bike into a ditch because you say you used to have a "little Honda" like that when you were younger. When the police grabbed you you started calling them cunts and trying to headbutt them, which they luckily mistook for a slow motion seizure."

"Thoughts about roigt!"

"And what do you want us to do for you?"

"I celd use about oight marr bottles av Chang, mate."

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro

Pixelante posted:

There's a Khmer lesbian masseuse on Pub Street in Siem Reap who will tattoo for super cheap because she wants the practice.
Haha, that's definitely who you want to go to.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

ReindeerF posted:

Haha, that's definitely who you want to go to.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCgPCbtSC1g

Pixelante
Mar 16, 2006

You people will by God act like a team, or at least like people who know each other, or I'll incinerate the bunch of you here and now.

I want to ask if those tattoos on the kids arm are ink or ink but I'm worried I already know the answer.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
Mai pen rai khap

MothraAttack
Apr 28, 2008
Best SE Asia tatto I saw was a Karen dude with YHWH tatted in Hebrew on his bicep. My Jewish friend was half amused.

Senso
Nov 4, 2005

Always working
I got a Charles Bukowski quote tattooed on my arm, in a tiny apartment in Saigon surrounded by shady Viets on drugs.

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro
The stereotypical idiot foreigner tattoo (there is no other kind) is the Buddhist tattoo on the ankle (i.e. next to the foot). It's like getting Jesus tattooed on your heel or something.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

Senso posted:

I got a Charles Bukowski quote tattooed on my arm, in a tiny apartment in Saigon surrounded by shady Viets on drugs.

Don't try.

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro
Senso is basically a cautionary tale.

Senso
Nov 4, 2005

Always working

I also got a bird on my arm tattooed while I was still drunk from the previous day's nightclub fiesta.

ReindeerF posted:

Senso is basically a cautionary tale.

You mean I'm a role model: I got out of SEA alive, not addicted to drugs and in good health (and no HIV or other STDs).

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
The bar has been set ladies and gentlemen

Finch!
Sep 11, 2001

Spatial Awareness?

[ ] Whaleshark

404 Not Found

Senso posted:

You mean I'm a role model: I got out of SEA alive, not addicted to drugs and in good health (and no HIV or other STDs).

I see all of that and raise with "and no tattoos" :v:

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
Cartoon Network is building a new waterpark complete with Finn and Jake rides and other family friendly fare.

They're building it in Pattaya.

I think it's a great idea. It gives me a reason to go to Pattaya at least. Not for the rides. Nor for Pattaya. But to see a Thai-Chinese mother scramble to shield her kids from the image of what Ser Oliver Taylor is doing to Nong Fon on Jake the Dog's face.

raton fucked around with this message at 01:19 on Oct 22, 2014

Shammypants
May 25, 2004

Let me tell you about true luxury.

Sheep-Goats posted:

Cartoon Network is building a new waterpark complete with Finn and Jake rides and other family friendly fare.

They're building it in Pattaya.

I think it's a great idea. It gives me a reason to go to Pattaya at least. Not for the rides. Nor for Pattaya. But to see a Thai-Chinese mother scramble to shield her kids from the image of what Ser Oliver Taylor is doing to Nong Fon on Jake the Dog's face.

How many dudes are booking trips there only to ship their kids off for the day so they can hit walking street

Good lord

cent0r
Feb 19, 2007

XyrlocShammypants posted:

How many dudes are booking trips there only to ship their kids off for the day so they can hit walking street

Good lord

That's a vacation where everybody wins.

Atlas Hugged
Mar 12, 2007


Put your arms around me,
fiddly digits, itchy britches
I love you all
And everyone comes home with some form of hepatitis.

Shammypants
May 25, 2004

Let me tell you about true luxury.

It's already a family destination. Seeing families of Russians with 8 year olds walking around the GoGos and boyclubs and brothels is truly heartwarming

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
Every Slav and Northern Slav must be squatting by three years old and have his first prostitute (while his father or uncle watches) by eight. If not he will grow to be a weak man unwilling to bash black lesbians with a broken off shovel handle. Fortunately his lot in life will be eased by a surplus of abuseable skinny white women, opiates, and a continuous free theater of dogs loving in the streets. If that doesn't do it you can always melt your cares away by gazing steadily at your wall carpet.

raton fucked around with this message at 04:45 on Oct 22, 2014

caberham
Mar 18, 2009

by Smythe
Grimey Drawer
Or you know everyone just stays inside the resort with nice private beaches.

Sketchy sex places is nothing special 745 jonggak stn exit 4 745 jonggak stn exit 4 Asia. It's gross but people treat it like littering

Negligent
Aug 20, 2013

Its just lovely here this time of year.
Parents taking their kpop loving kids to look at the glass houses in oh pal pal, new revenue stream for the seoul govt

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

caberham posted:

Or you know everyone just stays inside the resort with nice private beaches.

No infinity pool? gently caress that

=====

Hey here's an Asia joke.

Thailand, India, Indonesia, Bangladesh and Quatar walk into the UN. Guess which four get seats on the council for human rights?

=====

Also apparently a tiger got a taste of Australia yesterday at Tiger Kingdom in Phuket.

raton fucked around with this message at 17:20 on Oct 22, 2014

Negligent
Aug 20, 2013

Its just lovely here this time of year.
Apparently that reality tv show has everything you would expect: kid who fell in love in pattaya, old dude who overstayed and got to spend some time in prison, stupid people in phuket getting drunk and starting fights with 'the taiwanese', gay couple having surrogate problems

Pilsner
Nov 23, 2002

Negligent posted:

Apparently that reality tv show has everything you would expect: kid who fell in love in pattaya, old dude who overstayed and got to spend some time in prison, stupid people in phuket getting drunk and starting fights with 'the taiwanese', gay couple having surrogate problems
I can't think of a better trashy show. What's the name, if possible with a link to a website? I tried searching for The Embassy (was that it?), but couldn't find much.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
We try to keep Oz off of our internet due to lag. Lag so bad that it's possible that I heard about a TV show from the 90s and thought it was current -- http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Embassy_(TV_series)

Maybe they rebooted it? Apparently the original series was under pressure because it was causing some regional tension. Doesn't Oz have some thickskull running things there now? (Really every first world country is headed by a corporatist in the thinnest of possible masks these days it seems.)

raton fucked around with this message at 15:14 on Oct 23, 2014

Negligent
Aug 20, 2013

Its just lovely here this time of year.
http://www.tvcatchupaustralia.com/channel-9/the-embassy

Finch!
Sep 11, 2001

Spatial Awareness?

[ ] Whaleshark

404 Not Found

Sheep-Goats posted:

We try to keep Oz off of our internet due to lag. Lag so bad that it's possible that I heard about a TV show from the 90s and thought it was current -- http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Embassy_(TV_series)

Maybe they rebooted it? Apparently the original series was under pressure because it was causing some regional tension. Doesn't Oz have some thickskull running things there now? (Really every first world country is headed by a corporatist in the thinnest of possible masks these days it seems.)

I really only turn my TV on for sport :sigh:

kru
Oct 5, 2003

Sheep-Goats posted:

No infinity pool? gently caress that.

Squalid
Nov 4, 2008

What's the deal with English on Thai magazines. Every magazine I see is plastered with English, yet almost nobody speaks more than the barest smattering of phrases. Is it just that English is viewed as stylish or sophisticated?

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro
Yes, basically. You nailed it.

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!
English is international and international is cool and sophisticated.

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Vogler
Feb 6, 2009
I am looking to rent an apartment in central Chiang Mai for 15-25k baht. The Internet must be fast and reliable. Advice is much appreciated!

Edit: After some googling it seems that wired Internet is only for the luxury segment? =/

Vogler fucked around with this message at 09:04 on Oct 25, 2014

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