Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

14 INCH DICK TURBO posted:

Why haven't I been seeing updates about the latest priapism from Lamborghini?

Click here for the full 1280x782 image.

http://blog.caranddriver.com/lamborghini-releases-best-pic-yet-of-aventador-lp700-4/

I would feel like such an rear end in a top hat putting on that vinyl. Flat black vinyl wrap best vinyl wrap

# ¿ Feb 8, 2011 15:03

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 18:03

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

A5H posted:

That's Lamborghini's optical camo and not for style.

Well now I'm intrigued, can you elaborate? I googled quickly but all I found was this sweet kinect hack that turns you into the Predator

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qhXQ_1CQjg

heat fucked around with this message at 15:48 on Feb 8, 2011

# ¿ Feb 8, 2011 15:46

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Thanks! I learn new poo poo multiple times a day in this forum. I don't really see how that pattern hides the lines, especially since it was cut into lots of pieces and not matched back up, but then again I'm not a car paparazzi. The third link in A5H's google search is pretty hilarious: http://www.worldcarfans.com/110051026132/camouflaged-bmw-x3-prototype-triggers-bomb-scare-in-new

# ¿ Feb 8, 2011 18:37

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

I think the absurd amounts of money being handed to executives, especially CEOs, convinces them that they are great and awesome regardless of whether there is any supporting evidence. Professional failures like Meg Whitman keep getting bigger and bigger salaries which are inversely proportional to the success of the companies they were hired to run, many of which they run right into the ground before being hired as CEO somewhere else (or get elected to powerful government positions, and if they spectacularly fail at that as well, they can always be appointed).

# ¿ Feb 9, 2011 21:57

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

The cupholders in my Integra are just barely too small to hold a can of Arizona tea :mad:

# ¿ Feb 15, 2011 21:15

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Throatwarbler posted:

Reminder that the Ram 1500 comes with 3 link Panhard rod coil spring rear suspension. It's a Mustang with a bed.

OK back to the US/Canada chat. While thinking of a reply to 14 INCH I looked up the figures for truck sales and realized that on a per capital basis, Canadians buy about twice as many full size trucks as Americans. Ford F series sales in Canada were almost 100k in 2010 compared to ~550k for the US, even though the US has 10x as many people. Numbers for GM and Chrysler are about the same.

It's strange because I'm always under the impression that everything is bigger, cheaper and better in America, and that we in Canada have to deal with smaller, more expensive and crappier stuff as a necessary price of our social-democratic way of life. Since about 1 in 3 vehicles on the road here is a diesel 2500HD/F350 I assumed that in wealthy America, it would be....1 in 2? Or people just drove chassis cab/heavy duties? or surplus Warsaw Pact BTR-60s? I don't even know.

But it turns out that relatively more Americans just drive... cars. I don't even know what to think anymore.

Canada spends less than one thirtieth as much on military, doesn't pay pharmaceutical companies full retail price for drugs bought by the ton, and hasn't been steadily cutting funding for education while increasing funding for prisons. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret: almost nothing is better or cheaper in America.

# ¿ Feb 17, 2011 18:24

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Speaking of the DB9 I saw a DB9 Volante last summer and followed the guy a few lights so I could give him the thumbs up. Can't be too many of those in the states (like, a few dozen at most?)

heat fucked around with this message at 01:20 on Feb 25, 2011

# ¿ Feb 25, 2011 01:18

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Hermansen posted:

Aston Martin sold almost 1200 cars last year in Britain alone, so I'm thinking your numbers are a bit off..

They probably are, I was pretty much guessing. BUT you have to consider that they don't make very many Volantes to begin with and I would imagine the majority aren't left hand drive.

angryhampster posted:

Where was it and what color? The president of the company I work for owns a black one. Put it in a ditch last winter with an AM service tech in the passenger seat.

Black, outside of Pittsburgh (Homestead)

# ¿ Feb 25, 2011 01:57

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

ynotony posted:

I seem to only see those now. It's as if rich people go to the dealer, pick a car they like, but decide they want the most expensive version - whatever that is.

I think this is exactly what they do which somewhat explains why Clarkson always has a list of hilariously expensive options to read from.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2011 17:45

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Crustashio posted:

I've been pondering the idea of the "20%" reduction in the STi weight - is there even another affordable sporty car that is under 3000lb? All I can come up with is miata and cooper S.

Fiat 500 Abarth! (not in the US until 2012 though

)

# ¿ Mar 2, 2011 18:04

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

It's like that commercial where the guy grabs the bumper of his 370Z and stretches it into a Maxima.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2011 00:32

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Let me guess, every body panel is different* from the last 911

*in subtle, unnoticeable ways unless you try to swap them

# ¿ Apr 5, 2011 20:05

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Powershift posted:

See the little arrow next to the picture of a gas pump? That tells you the gas cap is on the passenger side of the car. Lots of new cars are doing this, and it's a simple, elegant solution to a common problem.

# ¿ Apr 20, 2011 22:00

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

kimbo305 posted:

The way I see it, the diagram is showing me the process of fueling: line up to gas pump on your left, then the nozzle pulls out and to the right, into the filler. The arrow next to the pump can be interpreted as action.

I think this is only a problem if you have autism. Seriously though, what could be more straightforward than an arrow pointing to the side of the car the pump needs to be on? The line of reasoning for someone who isn't completely over-thinking it is: oh I'm puling into a gas station, which side is the gas cap on again, oh yes the passenger side, thank you little arrow.

# ¿ Apr 20, 2011 23:41

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Faerunner posted:

After seven years of cars with it on the left, I still sometimes forget that it's on the right on the Saab, and we've had it almost a year.

I thought they started putting them on the passenger side of all cars for safety reasons (so you aren't standing in traffic to use a gas can) but apparently not.

dissss posted:

Its less embarrassing than what happens if you switch between cars with the indicator stalk on the left and cars with it on the right. I still end up hitting the wipers by accident every time I switch even after a decade.

What kind of moon-car has the stalk on the right? Or are you switching between left hand drive and right hand drive?

# ¿ Apr 21, 2011 17:12

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

KozmoNaut posted:

Really well done ad.

It sums up my view on automated cars, anyway. gently caress you safety nazis, I want to drive the drat thing myself and go wherever the gently caress I want to go.

I think the most likely automated car scenario will be you drive the car most places but on the highway there are special lanes where the computer takes over. Hopefully the network used to run the thing isn't designed by Sony.

# ¿ May 6, 2011 16:49

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Morphix posted:

I wonder how many screens/entertainment bullshit they've added to this one. Although I do have to say I loved seeing the GPS screen in the back compartment when I first saw them in NYC.

How useful can a GPS be in NYC? In downtown Pittsburgh mine routinely tells me I am two blocks away and also driving my car inside a building.

# ¿ May 11, 2011 21:01

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Thwomp posted:

50 more HP and it'd be perfect.

Funny you should say that because in about 18 months this happens

Oh and it will have 75 more horsepower :holy:

heat fucked around with this message at 16:36 on May 13, 2011

# ¿ May 13, 2011 16:11

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

kimbo305 posted:

I don't see this being priced competively with the Cooper S. I dunno about other places, but in Boston, the S outnumbers the base Cooper about 4 to 1. Obviously there's saturation for the Mini, but if the Abarth SS is too expensive, it's not going to win many conquests.

It will almost certainly be cheaper than a Cooper S. The base 500 is almost $5k cheaper than a base Cooper.

# ¿ May 13, 2011 17:34

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Keep in mind that the SS kit will add an additional couple thousand bucks on top of the regular Abarth (which is what I'm talking about)

# ¿ May 13, 2011 18:39

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

quote:

At Buick, GM's experts had decided that to cater to the elderly, the cars would have no instrument panel but would instead be run by voice controls. Lutz drove a prototype with an engineer.

"At his urging, I asked for 'more cold air.' 'No, no!' he said. 'You have to scroll verbally! First say 'climate control.' When the car says 'climate control,' you say 'blower. When the car repeats 'blower," you say 'up one.' Same with temperature.'"

Ahahahaha it's almost as if they had never met an old person.

On second thought, this could have been an ingenious plot to make it impossible for old people to operate their cars, thus making the roads much safer for the rest of us. drat you Bob Lutz!

# ¿ May 24, 2011 21:01

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Mordred posted:

Neither do you. It starts at $80,714 here in Denmark.

Yeah but you get free healthc... er, hang on

# ¿ May 31, 2011 19:46

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Mordred posted:

Yeah, 'free' might not be the right word to use...

My joke was that Canadians also get free healthcare.

# ¿ May 31, 2011 21:34

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

Other than the loving horrible face its not too terrible I guess...

A lot of pretty important people who make a lot of money greenlighted that poo poo, that's insane.

Have you ever participated in any sort of corporate meeting?

# ¿ Jun 5, 2011 20:01

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

travisray2004 posted:

I saw a loving Nautica edition Mercury Villager yesterday. I don't even know what the selling point of that edition was when new. Comes with Nautica cologne airfreshners? A pair of jeans?

I decided they went off the deep end when I saw the commercial for the Call of Duty: Black Ops special edition Jeep Wrangler

# ¿ Jul 8, 2011 23:13

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Solar Coaster posted:

Speaking of hot hatches, looks like Fiat will be debuting the 500 Abarth stateside at the LA Auto Show.

If this really happens, it's more tempting to look at a 500 for my next car.

Well it's definitely happening we just don't know when it will go on sale, rumor is Q1 2012

# ¿ Jul 27, 2011 01:58

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

sim posted:

Sure: http://www.fiat500abarth.us. Let me know if you have any suggestions!

Well it certainly looks a hell of a lot better than the Fiat 500 USA blog, which has great information but looks like it was made for a high school computer science project (in 1998).

# ¿ Jul 28, 2011 15:53

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Boiled Water posted:

Is it actually any different from the old one?

They probably did the old "slightly change every body panel just enough to drive future collectors mother loving insane" trick

# ¿ Aug 18, 2011 19:50

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

A MIRACLE posted:

Are you loving kidding me

Hahahaha it's the exact opposite of that noise-cancelling technology where inverse engine noise comes out of the speakers and cancels out actual engine noise

# ¿ Aug 20, 2011 00:38

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

"I would get one of those new horseless carriages but where on earth will I buy fuel?"

-- Person in 1911

# ¿ Aug 31, 2011 19:47

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Seriously though I think this guy is right and the real answer are batteries under the car that can easily and quickly be changed out at a battery station. Of course this would require different manufacturers to agree on some sort of standard, but it's still a good idea:

http://www.ted.com/talks/shai_agassi_on_electric_cars.html

# ¿ Aug 31, 2011 19:49

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

bull3964 posted:

On the surface, quick replaceable batteries sound like a great solution, but consider the logistics.

I'm not talking about the actual physical swap, I'm talking about vehicle throughput. How many cars does a moderately busy gas station see in an hour? Even using the 45 minute quickcharge at 480 volts, will they realistically be able to keep up with traffic?

How many batteries can they quickcharge at once before the station requires commercial power on the scale of a small factory?

Granted, station demand should be lessened by people charging at home. However, it's still going to require some pretty significant upgrades to the power grid and some creative thinking to handle traffic.

Well since it will certainly be much cheaper to recharge at home, most people will, but the battery station comes in for longer trips between cities.

# ¿ Sep 1, 2011 15:32

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Yeah but the corvette has the accelerometer in a HUD, like a fighter jet :colbert:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ko9kzyqW-l8#t=4m16s

# ¿ Sep 28, 2011 15:03

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Left Ventricle posted:

Have car makers forgotten that people have arms, and that said arms sometimes need to be somewhere other than pointing at the steering wheel or shifter? Resting on something, if you will?

Especially in a manual, I mean what the poo poo

# ¿ Sep 28, 2011 20:21

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Considering that it's getting the entire GT-R drivetrain as well, driving that would probably equate to reaching spiritual nirvana

# ¿ Oct 4, 2011 20:35

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 18:03

heat: Sep 4, 2003; The Mad Monk

Man, that seafoam video would have been epic.

# ¿ Oct 6, 2011 05:51

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit