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kells
Mar 19, 2009


Some rude Indian customer just called me a stinkyhole.

I hung up on him.

Glad this is my last day!

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RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS
Dec 21, 2010


kells posted:

Some rude Indian customer just called me a stinkyhole.

I hung up on him.

Glad this is my last day!

Hanging up on people is like the only recourse you have in a call center so it's incredibly liberating when you finally start doing it. Like you know, it sounds petty, but the feeling when someone says to you, "I need to talk to a supervisor, I'm tired of talking to morons" to you and you just cut the line? Great.

bulbous nub
Jul 29, 2007

It's ok; I'm taking it back.

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS posted:

Hanging up on people is like the only recourse you have in a call center so it's incredibly liberating when you finally start doing it. Like you know, it sounds petty, but the feeling when someone says to you, "I need to talk to a supervisor, I'm tired of talking to morons" to you and you just cut the line? Great.

The job I'm working at now has a no-hang up policy and it loving sucks. The only two times we are authorized to hang up on a customer is 1) if they say they are recording the call, we ask them to stop and they say no, and 2) if they threaten legal action against the company. We give them one warning that if they say it again, we're disconnecting and then when they continue, they're done.

Abusive customers get to run all over us and there isn't a thing we can do about it. Thank god my next job is REAL(-ish, it's only Tier 1 helpdesk) troubleshooting that is business-to-business only and I'm located in the home office, so everyone, according to people who work there, is super nice.

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS
Dec 21, 2010


bulbous nub posted:

The job I'm working at now has a no-hang up policy and it loving sucks. The only two times we are authorized to hang up on a customer is 1) if they say they are recording the call, we ask them to stop and they say no, and 2) if they threaten legal action against the company. We give them one warning that if they say it again, we're disconnecting and then when they continue, they're done.

Abusive customers get to run all over us and there isn't a thing we can do about it. Thank god my next job is REAL(-ish, it's only Tier 1 helpdesk) troubleshooting that is business-to-business only and I'm located in the home office, so everyone, according to people who work there, is super nice.

Oh, well, if I were caught hanging up on anyone for any reason, I would have been fired on the spot. Some of my co-workers were kind enough to explain that you could make it look as though a call had been dropped rather than terminated by hanging up in a particular way. But I wouldn't exactly have been upset if they fired me from that job because I was falling into a serious depressive funk thanks to doing it.

Harminoff
Oct 24, 2005

listerine and mr. green

So two of my managers are putting in their two weeks as they found jobs at another center and my third got demoted today to a team lead. They are trying to hire another manager but at $10/hr which is less then what I and many agents make on the phone.

The reason the two are leaving is pretty funny though. They told another manager that works in another project that we were shutting down, and then managers had to move to Guatemala. She broke down in tears, and they then told her it was a joke. She went and told our boss, who in turn forced them to work open-close (7am-11pm)

So now my department has no managers. We now have no in house qa (it's outsourced to India which is terrible. I get docked points on every qa for my Midwest American accent) and also no HR department.

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS
Dec 21, 2010


QA outsourced, what the heck.

Also I'm constantly surprised at the kind of wages "managers" are being paid, like, why would you want to take on the extra responsibility for loving ten bucks an hour? Anything to be off the phones I guess, but still...

Neutsy
Feb 11, 2012

by Y Kant Ozma Post


I used to work technical support for HP. I worked in the "Media center/TouchSmart" Division. Here are my stories:

-The most frequent calls, and eventually chat's and e-mails about the dreaded projector were from religious nuts. These were quite possibly the worst people to deal with, they honestly believed that whatever god they prayed too would provide free projector parts for their 8+ year OOW projector. HP doesn't believe in gods

-The best, possibly the most patient folk to deal with were Veterans, Truckers, and folk that just were released from prison.

-Best TV related story: Yes, HP sold TV's for a time.
A gentleman came on chat shortly before the end of my Friday night shift. His child threw a Wii remote at the screen of the dreaded 65" Digital Projection HDTV. This TV was old as dirt at this point, at least 5 years OOW (Out of Warranty). For whatever reason he honestly wanted to fix this dinosaur. Despite me pleading with him to buy a new TV.
I searched parts surfer or whatever program it was called, and by some strange luck, found a replacement screen. To my surprise, he bought it AND paid to have our technician come out and put it back together.
It ended up costing him some insane amount like $2100 US.

-Best TouchSmart Call:
About mid-day a chat came through a few co-workers screen and landed in my lap. It was a young kid, maybe eight or nine who was screwing around on his dad's new TouchSmart IQ804. It bluescreen'd for some reason. He wanted me to "Remove the History" and I kid you not "Magic touch the computer back". Since I had to troubleshoot the blue screen issue, I couldn't remotely access the desktop. Especially without the owner's consent.

Kid: If you dunn tell mah dad, I'll send you my iPod nanooo :P

Me: I have to have your dad's permission to access your computer.

Kid: Nooooooooooooo you don't, you can just Magic Touch it.

Me: Magic Touch?

Kid: gently caress YOU GET ME YOUR SUPPERVISER!!

Me: .....

Thankfully for whatever reason the chat terminated.

-Daily basis dealt with quite possibly the worst people. The "YOU KNOW, I own THREE of these things, and *Insert random number of HP products here*, I AM A VALUED CUSTOMER, I DEMAND YOU FIX THIS FOR ME FOR FREE NOW!!!!!
So happy I don't work there anymore.

Harminoff
Oct 24, 2005

listerine and mr. green

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS posted:

QA outsourced, what the heck.

Also I'm constantly surprised at the kind of wages "managers" are being paid, like, why would you want to take on the extra responsibility for loving ten bucks an hour? Anything to be off the phones I guess, but still...

The best part about qa being outsourced is that they don't have access to our software. I work for a cable company and sometimes we have customers in areas where the phone isn't available. If I don't tell the customer this the qa docks me points for not offering it.

I'd be surprised if this company is still around come mid year. It sucks because I've sadly worked here for five years and am used to not having to be on time, and being able to browse the web all day. If I were to get some factory job I'd get fired fast because I wouldn't be used to actually working.

Korgan
Feb 14, 2012



We had some internet drama boil over into real life today, resulting in a firing. Word around the employee grapevine was that googling '<company name> sucks' would bring up a website full of people complaining about our company, and that it was good for a quick glance and a laugh. By the time I heard about it and looked it up, one of my coworkers (John) had decided to respond to the commenters... by swearing at them and signing his posts with internal department names. Then, in a stroke of genius, he signed off one particularly vile rant with the full name of one of our coworkers, Bob (John doesn't like Bob because Bob works well whenever he's needed to come in, while John has been reprimanded for pretending to dial while actually just pressing the 'no reply' button).

I told Bob about it (because that's what I'd hope someone else would do if it were me, if you googled Bob's name and <company name>, the rant in question was one of the first links, great for future job prospects), he told our supervisor's boss, the boss came in and got the sites cooperation to track the comments' author down, discovered it was John, and then fired him.

Can't wait to see what else comes of this, especially as everyone else knows it was Bob who blabbed, and John had some close friends working here who also don't like him.

TL;DR don't write slanderous comments about your company on the internet and sign it with someone else's name if you want to keep your job.

Harminoff
Oct 24, 2005

listerine and mr. green

True that http://www.reverbnation.com/artist/...etails/12142852

BigDave
Jul 14, 2009

WHEN THE PRESIDENT DOES IT, THAT MEANS THAT IT'S NOT ILLEGAL!

Had a rough day yesterday. Our queue never got below 15, and this is supposed to be our 'off season' with Holiday being over. It was 10 minutes to closing, and I got this loving psycho from Tennessee on my line. He was calling about this $1000 Text Message scam that's been going around, and kept threatening to call Nancy Grace and we were behind the scam and a bunch of tin-foil hat poo poo.

The part where it got creepy was when he kept saying that the text message 'dun touched ma 13 years old daughter' and we were 'kiddy touchers'. He got really graphic in describing how the text message 'dun touched ma daughter'. I got him to a sup who had to hang up on him, this guy was so loving crazy. I mean like Ted Bundy or Berkowitz crazy. This guy had one of those serial killer voices too, I half expected him to tell me to squeal like a pig.

Idiots I can handle, angry people I can handle. But psychos always get under my skin, and I always end their calls feeling a little afraid.



Edit: And he called back twice. With the same thing.

Tennis Ball
Jan 29, 2009


BigDave posted:

Had a rough day yesterday. Our queue never got below 15, and this is supposed to be our 'off season' with Holiday being over. It was 10 minutes to closing, and I got this loving psycho from Tennessee on my line. He was calling about this $1000 Text Message scam that's been going around, and kept threatening to call Nancy Grace and we were behind the scam and a bunch of tin-foil hat poo poo.

The part where it got creepy was when he kept saying that the text message 'dun touched ma 13 years old daughter' and we were 'kiddy touchers'. He got really graphic in describing how the text message 'dun touched ma daughter'. I got him to a sup who had to hang up on him, this guy was so loving crazy. I mean like Ted Bundy or Berkowitz crazy. This guy had one of those serial killer voices too, I half expected him to tell me to squeal like a pig.

Idiots I can handle, angry people I can handle. But psychos always get under my skin, and I always end their calls feeling a little afraid.



Edit: And he called back twice. With the same thing.

Yeah, that creeps me out. We had a guy call once who spoke like that word spaghetti that you see Schizophrenics type on the internet sometimes. It was weird.

Related to that, as I think I mentioned before, I also do field work sometimes (Weird call center set up) and had to go into a residence the other day, and inside the bedroom were just bottles of piss, everywhere. So many bottles. I just left. I couldn't do it.

MS Paint
Sep 21, 2007

Boring Ass Troll


So i'm looking to get into HR, and it just so happens starbucks corporate is hiring for call center HR (employee HR assistance). to me this reeks of mindless bullshit, but tell me:

what should i look out for? what are the dead-end-job signs in a call center?
Anyone here have starbucks corporate or hr call center experience to give me an idea of what problems exist?
Does inflexibility on pay indicate a bad sign, even if you are overqualified?

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS
Dec 21, 2010


Rhonyn Peacemaker posted:

So i'm looking to get into HR, and it just so happens starbucks corporate is hiring for call center HR (employee HR assistance). to me this reeks of mindless bullshit, but tell me:

what should i look out for? what are the dead-end-job signs in a call center?
Anyone here have starbucks corporate or hr call center experience to give me an idea of what problems exist?
Does inflexibility on pay indicate a bad sign, even if you are overqualified?

I'm personally surprised that Starbucks has a call center.

As for your other question: personally I saw a lot of people get promoted off the phones into roles like HR or whatever, and then a couple months later the position would actually be abolished and they would put folks back on the phones. I think in general call centers are always having dramatic shifts so I wouldn't think any job in one is very stable.

sbaldrick
Jul 19, 2006
Driven by Hate


corporate call centres are very different then a call centre like most of these ones. It would basically be talking to people that work in stores bitching about things. It's the best kind of call centre job.

martyrdumb
Nov 24, 2009

pants are overrated


sbaldrick posted:

corporate call centres are very different then a call centre like most of these ones. It would basically be talking to people that work in stores bitching about things. It's the best kind of call centre job.

Yeah I'd say B2B call centers are bound to be more pleasant than dealing with customers or the general public. Inflexibility on salary is a bad sign. However, I still think you should apply for the job. You may not think salary is negotiable, but you should always try to haggle when they give you the official offer. You might be surprised. If they're still inflexible after interviewing and offer you the job, though, and the wage sucks, I'd decline the offer.

MS Paint
Sep 21, 2007

Boring Ass Troll


Yeah, it would be a pay cut from where i am at now, but it goes into my field. I guess that will depend on how it looks/feels.

Aerofallosov
Oct 3, 2007

It was so peaceful beneath the glittering stars.


I really hate that we have to type out/send out instructions on log-in info only to get told immediately that the person isn't going to bother because just having us reset it all the time is easier.

Agh, what the hell? Why not take the time and do it yourself so you can handle it if you forget things on the weekend?

sbaldrick
Jul 19, 2006
Driven by Hate


Can you afford to take the paycut, and will getting your foot in the door in the corp. further your career goals. If not don't apply for it.

Kreczor
Oct 30, 2011

I'd still rather play with medieval knights online then go outside and "hang out".

EA is a terrible, horrific company that deserves to be shut down.

Their call centers however, are some of the best I've ever called to. Yesterday I spent maybe 5 minutes with a guy (I was his first call) to get a refund on a product. I was extremely nice and respectful (and I think pretty understanding when he said he was just searching something or didn't select the proper search keywords or something) and overall got proper support. I'm pretty happy with myself seeing how I lurk this thread and get to see how lovely your job becomes when the first call starts out bad. I'm happy for giving this young man a good start to his day. (5 stars for that guy on the survey too).

Sometimes I'm really nice, maybe too nice.

jassi007
Aug 9, 2006

mmmmm.. burger...

I wish people wouldn't explain things over and over and over like I don't understand them. I just had a call where he was looking for the option to stop paper billing on our website. Now admittedly it is in a hard to find place, but he explained this like 6 times in different ways as if I did not understand him. The problem was he never stopped talking or asked if I knew what he was looking for etc. I had to interrupt him and tell him I knew what he was looking for and if he'd allow me I can tell him where to find it. He seriously went on for like 3 or 4 minutes just saying "how do I turn off paper invoices?"

you ate my cat
Jul 1, 2007



Any ever notice that no one can pronounce the word 'authentication' when they're reading it to you? I don't remember the last time someone read "Log on using Secure Password Authentication" to me without spending a couple minutes butchering it.

miryei
Oct 11, 2011


you ate my cat posted:

Any ever notice that no one can pronounce the word 'authentication' when they're reading it to you? I don't remember the last time someone read "Log on using Secure Password Authentication" to me without spending a couple minutes butchering it.

Log on using security password authoritorial.

Log on using secure passcode authorization.

Log in using--how do I log in? Do I put my password in this box that says Username?

Log on usage security password authentification.

jassi007
Aug 9, 2006

mmmmm.. burger...

miryei posted:

Log on using security password authoritorial.

Log on using secure passcode authorization.

Log in using--how do I log in? Do I put my password in this box that says Username?

Log on usage security password authentification.

authenticity

BlackIronHeart
Aug 1, 2004

The Oath Breaker's about to hit warphead nine Kaptain!

Yeah, 'Authenticity' is the one I always hear.

miryei
Oct 11, 2011


BlackIronHeart posted:

Yeah, 'Authenticity' is the one I always hear.

I actually get 'Authentification' quite a lot. 'Authenticity' is a runner-up.

Loving Life Partner
Apr 17, 2003

You want to file a WHAT!?

New pet peeve:

People who try way too hard to sound articulate for no loving reason. We're talking about something very simple, how do you turn:

"I need to get proof of insurance sent to the DMV"

into

"I purchased this policy contract from you on the January the 5th 2012 and was told by a representative at that time that proof of my motor vehicular coverages would be supplied to the department of motor vehicles here in Cleveland forthwith, and yet they have notified me that they have not received any such communications from your company as of yet!"

And that paragraph has lots of "uhhhh"'s and stumbles and stammers in it, because they don't loving talk like that!

Benzoyl Peroxide
Jun 6, 2007

[C6H5C(O)]2O2


Aw, that's kind of sweet though.

Ghostnuke
Sep 21, 2005

Throw this in a pot, add some broth, a potato? Baby you got a stew going!

Benzoyl Peroxide posted:

Aw, that's kind of sweet though.

No it's not. Get to the loving point so I can stop talking to you.

RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS
Dec 21, 2010


Loving Life Partner posted:

New pet peeve:

People who try way too hard to sound articulate for no loving reason. We're talking about something very simple, how do you turn:

"I need to get proof of insurance sent to the DMV"

into

"I purchased this policy contract from you on the January the 5th 2012 and was told by a representative at that time that proof of my motor vehicular coverages would be supplied to the department of motor vehicles here in Cleveland forthwith, and yet they have notified me that they have not received any such communications from your company as of yet!"

And that paragraph has lots of "uhhhh"'s and stumbles and stammers in it, because they don't loving talk like that!

You forgot to insert a bunch of incorrectly used big words.

Cup of Hemlock
Jan 31, 2010

Oski Wow-Wow!
Whiskey Wee-Wee!
Olee! Muckie-eye!
Olee! Berkeley-eye!
California! Wow!


jassi007 posted:

I wish people wouldn't explain things over and over and over like I don't understand them. I just had a call where he was looking for the option to stop paper billing on our website. Now admittedly it is in a hard to find place, but he explained this like 6 times in different ways as if I did not understand him. The problem was he never stopped talking or asked if I knew what he was looking for etc. I had to interrupt him and tell him I knew what he was looking for and if he'd allow me I can tell him where to find it. He seriously went on for like 3 or 4 minutes just saying "how do I turn off paper invoices?"

Lord yes. Although I get this from the field staff I support. "And this needs to be done ASAP (continues to reiterate what's already been said three times)."

Maybe if you'd get off the line with me I could actually do that for you! Has everyone else been so thick you need to repeat yourself?

Don't answer that. But really. I just want to be trusted.

SpartanIV
May 18, 2007

Havin' a good time

So this story begins last month when I was given a list of accounts that didn't have phone numbers with them and tasked to find phone numbers for them. This is a common thing although people in my dept don't do it that often, it's usually for higher depts to do. Anyway, after researching one account I found out that the primary borrower who is the husband, was at a rally with his wife and long story short shot 2 of his friends, his wife 6 times, and then killed himself. So I found all this out and confirmed it was actually the right guy and not someone else with the same name and put all my documentation on the account and moved on.

Well today, someone in the higher department was going through the list of accounts that still didn't have numbers(this being one as everyone is dead/hospitalized) and was impressed by how much I had found and how well documented it was, as well as the general fact that someone we had done business with in the past turned out to be a psychopath. So this got forwarded around the floor, then up to management, and then back down to me with a bunch of great comments towards both me and my manager.

AA is for Quitters
Aug 6, 2009

Hold the newsreader's nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers.

Hells yes graveyard shift, alone. Get to chill the gently caress out, listen to some music, and call some bitches. Now I just need to talk my boss into expanding into Hawaii so I can work a proper overnight shift.

spog
Aug 7, 2004

I seem to smell the stench of appeasement in the air.

jassi007 posted:

I wish people wouldn't explain things over and over and over like I don't understand them. I just had a call where he was looking for the option to stop paper billing on our website. Now admittedly it is in a hard to find place, but he explained this like 6 times in different ways as if I did not understand him.

To be fair, that is because an awful lot of phone jockeys don't understand very simple requests.

Or worse, pretend that they did and not solve the problem at all.

You're just being painted with the same brush.

Boomer The Cannon
Oct 27, 2011

Gotta see it live!


Harminoff posted:

So two of my managers are putting in their two weeks as they found jobs at another center and my third got demoted today to a team lead. They are trying to hire another manager but at $10/hr which is less then what I and many agents make on the phone.

The reason the two are leaving is pretty funny though. They told another manager that works in another project that we were shutting down, and then managers had to move to Guatemala. She broke down in tears, and they then told her it was a joke. She went and told our boss, who in turn forced them to work open-close (7am-11pm)

So now my department has no managers. We now have no in house qa (it's outsourced to India which is terrible. I get docked points on every qa for my Midwest American accent) and also no HR department.
Are we talking Ohio midwest here? Sounds a heck of a lot like the company I work for.

martyrdumb
Nov 24, 2009

pants are overrated


I'm so tired of my job that I've completely stopped caring whether I get fired or not. Paradoxically, that makes my time on the clock much more enjoyable. Thus far, I have:

Spent 2-5 minutes in after-call mode, after every single call, for weeks on end.
Clocked in 2-6 minutes late every day (more than that would be counted as a tardy).
Given people information that we are forbidden to give out (whether a claim is open or closed, liability determinations, internal claim notes, poo poo like that).
Hung up on people who put me on hold (you're calling me, motherfuckers, call back when you have time for this poo poo).
Blind-transferred people into oblivion if I didn't want to deal with their problem, after asking them to hold.
Blatantly hung up on assholes.
Spent half the time I am supposed to be entering faxes loving around on the internet.
And, when I get a multiple claim call (that fucks my adherence and weekly call time all to hell), I take the first claim then transfer them back to get somebody else to do the rest (after I ask them to hold for just a moment, heh).

And here's the kicker: I've done ALL of this without a single negative repercussion. Either nobody's noticed, or nobody gives a poo poo. It's so liberating.

BlackIronHeart
Aug 1, 2004

The Oath Breaker's about to hit warphead nine Kaptain!

I guess that explains why you abandoned your E/n thread about hating work.

legsarerequired
Dec 31, 2007


martyrdumb posted:

I'm so tired of my job that I've completely stopped caring whether I get fired or not. Paradoxically, that makes my time on the clock much more enjoyable. Thus far, I have:

This list reminded me of my call center, but I'd immediately get dinged for all of those things. My managers are all obsessed with metrics right now.

It's pretty sad, but I'm considering finding a new call center to work at. I just can't seem to find work at a "real" office job, even after two years. Of course I'm going to keep applying around, but I just feel like a change of scenery would be good. Some of the people who have worked at other call centers are telling me that the work environment and the huge emphasis on metrics here is way worse than at other places, too (although I'm sure that it's there at all places...).

The main thing holding me back is that I currently make $38,000 a year and I don't want to take a paycut yet (yes, I know that's crazy and unreasonable for my post-college work history).

martyrdumb
Nov 24, 2009

pants are overrated


legsarerequired posted:

The main thing holding me back is that I currently make $38,000 a year and I don't want to take a paycut yet (yes, I know that's crazy and unreasonable for my post-college work history).

Same here. I'm pulling in almost $30k with my shift differential (could be more but I refuse to do OT, I'm burned-out enough as it is). I applied around to other call centers in the area, and none pay as good. I got this job pre-recession, which sucks a bag of dicks because I can't find any other companies willing to pay that much and match my current benefits.

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Gothmog1065
May 14, 2009


I have never had a job physically make me ill, or this angry. These people sit here and fap off to metrics and limiting troublecalls, but we get calls from our tier 2 with offline modems, which should all have troublecalls there (We can only send out 1.8ish trucks per 10 to get any sort of "bonus". I regularly get 3 trouble calls that should have been done elsewhere per day (I take 30ish calls a day). THEN on top of that, a technician that's too stupid to call another number on a house is going to hit that metric AGAIN, AND my FCR (First call resolution - Another bullshit metric). I know there's a problem when I sit down before work, read one email and I"m immediately about to throw my loving keyboard because of how loving stupid people are.

God I hate this job and my customers so much.

Oh yeah, and the customer yesterday:

"I will not be inconvenienced to go to the front office. The people are too poor to mail their checks or have bank accounts, and have to use cash money in and I feel like I have to get a hepatitis shot every time I leave there."

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