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null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Shes Not Impressed posted:

Stern fans want Howard to live in constant fear of being a hypocrite and refuse to change and grow up. The guy is a mental case, and that will never change, but people's environments do. I can't blame him for being in his fifties and refusing to insult celebrities to their face like he's some DJ sharpening to be edgy.

I'm not sure what is worse sometimes: people saying a radio show "jumped the shark" or blaming Howard for his life changing due to wealth.

And Artie's laugh alone is enough to make a day better.

Back in the day, isn't that why he got Stuttering John? Isn't that why he would let Artie run all over Eric the midget? The problem is with Artie gone, he has no attack dog, he isn't attacking and hasn't for awhile. Howard has always been a softy, he never liked the confrontation and if given a chance would rather "love" somebody.

Eric calls have been boring because they all humor him and Howard goes on and on about how much he loves the little guy (for what reasons?). Eric is a tiny nugget of poo poo, if he wasn't a midget he would be a 5 foot tall pile of poo poo. Hell, he even tries to find redeeming qualities in High Pitch Eric! Artie would roll in there and smack him around and let him attack those people while still keeping his "That's Artie, not me, I love you man" vibe.

He does the same thing with his agent. Telling George Takai to ask his agent instead so he could tell him no.

Man, we need an rear end in a top hat on the show, I'd even settle for Ralph, but he is too busy sucking off the iron man guy and Sam Simon.

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null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
You could also say Howard was keeping drug addled artie on the show for us and didn't want to stop it because it was radio gold.

Also the history of Howard stern makes me cringe a lot more then current Howie. I was a kid when I started listening to him, and strippers and fart jokes are great and all, but a lot of his early stuff came off as him doing poo poo to get attention and to shock people. The whole bit with Leno and strippers was pretty stupid, he did it to get a rise out of him and shock him.

Back in the day he was running head to head with Rush, pandering to his crowd. Rush was spewing republican hate while Howard was farting on construction workers and trying to talk about sex.

I like the things on the show that are interesting, the way he picks up on the smaller stuff, whack packers, talking about his mother and childhood and the stories he tells, I hate when he does his radio shock jock poo poo. I'm glad he isn't yelling into a megaphone telling Rosie she needs rear end cancer and I like that he doesn't battle local radio stations for ratings. I also can do without him talking to strippers and whores (unless Artie is there to call them whores and throw money at them and mock them to the point of tears).

I just heard the monday rant about his trip, that was great stuff. I can't wait to hear about KC's tranny too. The less bits and celebs they do on that show, the happier I am. Just start talking to people. Talk to Sal, talk to George Takai, find out what Robin is sticking up her rear end or how Garey has to give up his chicken to his kids. Talk about Beth not blowing you, and Fergie's rear end in a top hat hanging out after being raped by the black guy pe(nis)as.

I like hearing Howard talk, he seems to do more of that now and less of his radio bits and I'm glad for that.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

kolby posted:

THE BIG BIG BANG

I still haven't heard that whole song and I'm walking around singing Howard's rendition of it.

I like how his mental mind went right to his parents loving. "The big bang is also a sexual thing, because you got here because of your parent's big bang".

The ant story was great, just another example of it doesn't matter if Howard is living on a private island being pampered, he still has poo poo to talk about. The world's greatest recluse leaves his mansion! It was funny to think him leaving his house and going on vacation pretty much anywhere but the top 3 hotels in the worlds means he is going to spend his time in a shittier place than his home. While most people usually end up thinking a hotel is nicer than their place when they do a big vacation.

Howard is a basket case and will always have tons of stuff to talk about. I love that he seems to be off the reality tv wrap up (might be because nothing is on) I could never get into him talking about dancing with the stars or whatever else, he literally just liked that show and talked about it and whenever he likes anything, it tends to be boring.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
It was also pretty insane that Richard got pretty much ripped and in great shape and everyone was still goofing on him, saying he looks worse, he is losing weight wrong and other poo poo.

Dude owns, he drinks mimosas and counts his calories and plays the drum and just straight up and down owns.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Kelly posted:

And you know, outside of my family and a couple of friends, Howard is my longest relationship. I'm 35 and have been listening regularly since I was 19 or 20. So gently caress yeah I am going to take the show a bit personally.

Are you from Brooklyn? Maryann?!?!?

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Bonzo posted:

my god...my spine just stiffened as I read that in her voice.

Have they ever interviewed her husband or kids?

I love when they get into her story. Like she literally loves Howard, I remember her "joking" about it with her husband, and just feeling bad that the poor dude will never be Howard. I'm also surprised Howard never got her to strip or anything, with as much stuff as she does for him, waiting like a psychopath at any appearance.

I love when they get deeper into what makes somebody obsessed with the show/howard and being a whack packer.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
It's also horrible to hear him poorly trying to hook Howard into more air time with absolutely nothing to say and nobody calls him out on it. Howard just seems to play along with him for too long hoping he will do something interesting instead of just asking about Beth's feet or whatever when he runs out of steam.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Speaking of soundboards, why do you catch Fred saying things like I can't pull up those two sounds, they are on different pages.

Can't they come up with a better way to play fart sounds and cougars roaring at the same time?

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Oh man, that is so horrible. Poor Fred!

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

EngineerJoe posted:

That app totally needs a dual touch screen interface. The second screen would be purely a 'scratch pad' where you could add current sounds that you want to play with.

Done!

Call Ralph up, sounds like something he could do with an iPad.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Smeep posted:

I have no idea what you're trying to say here.

I think it's Hateman.

Whatever happened to that guy anyway? I love the idea of a grown man yelling non stop at Robin.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
I hope it's long ropes, those are my faaaaaavorite.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Manwithastick posted:

Did we ever find out why the Eric the Midget real doll never got made?

Howard lied.

I would have given anything to see Artie plow that little midget bung hole.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Because they wanted a surly fat guy? Don't think Howard cared about Jon until he made Iron Man

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
What the average consumer thinks and what is true is hardly ever the same. There is a phone called Droid, there is an OS called Android. From now until the history of phones is over, people won't care which one you call it and if you point it out you might as well be rolling around in a Stephen Hawkings wheelchair on your way to a D&D camp for all anyone cares.

I don't give them poo poo over that, that is common place stuff. The real funny stuff is when they invent sim chips that go in cars and play music.

Also, yeah, it is hard to bag on Robin for her sick cat. She has the money, might as well take care of the poor thing. I'm amazed she hasn't started her pets on green drink.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Glumwheels posted:

Is Camille Grammer the wife with IBS that they used to make fun of? Or was that another wife of Kelsey's?

Yeah, they used to play all sorts of farting noises while pretend Fraiser would try to call her into the bedroom. That was great stuff.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Glumwheels posted:

Howard said today at the end of the show KC and his tranny would be in tomorrow. I can't wait.

edit: why the he'll did Robin name her cats Brangelina and Jennifer Aniston??

Because cat names are pointless for everyone involved?

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

There better be a million song parodies coming out of this, holy poo poo. KC is a good looking dude too, he could get a much hotter tranny.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
I love to hear more about the questions and how they answered them and how they think each other is lying then the results of the actual test. I have serious doubts a myspace level quiz of yes and no questions is going to provide any useful information.

They did more then just the yes/no questions, didn't they? Is the test designed to know when you are lying? I'd imagine most of them would lie up and down, like Robin is proved to be doing already.

Artie on Queer Eye will always be awesome. I loved it.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

jerkstore77 posted:

I think most if not all of the Jack and Rod bits are fake, right? I know I've heard the same "guests" voices on other calls.

But fake or not, the cancer kazoo Jack and Rod is hilarious and is the best one.

Most of them are edited out of order for sure, I think the re-record some of their parts to match the responses, but I think they have no problem finding loons to talk to about their books and magic crystals and poo poo.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Howard does look like a gigantic Fran Lebowits

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null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

scapulataf posted:

My favorite KC song parody is "For those guys who like to suck cock, ORGASM!!! KC salutes you"!!!

I can't stop singing "KC posed for gay photographs (WITH A GERMAN HOMO) gay photographs, KC POSED FOR GAY PHOTOGRAPHS"

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Well, keep on mind she is just on loan, thanks to Uncle Tim.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Sizzlechest posted:

Regarding whether or not the interviews are fake, I do think some of the "guests" do sound alike. The guy from the Kirk Douglas/Crackhead Bob interview sounds a lot like the guy from the Dick Clark one. I don't necessarily think they're faking the whole thing. They may do an interview with a book author, but get a voice actor to redo the whole thing since they can't get the okay from the original person. I have my doubts about this since you'd figure they'd make everyone sign something beforehand to give Sirus the right to do anything they drat well please. On the other hand, maybe they're so afraid of getting sued like Sacha Baron Cohen that they re-record them. Then again, why not just do that with the calls they can't get permission on?

There was a time when Artie alluded to big secret about Sal's clock call that people speculated that meant that it was fake. Howard also admitted to "sweetening" things like Stuttering John's stuttering to make it sound worse than it did.

Prank Calls are legal in some states, and to some states, mainly the ones with the no consent needed to record. But the way the Jack and Rodd show is setup, it wouldn't be illegal if they call you and you tell them they are doing a show. These people call into a "show" hoping to promote their books. Everyone knows they are being recorded, no consent needs to be given.

I suppose, the only fake thing is I think Sal and Richard just cut up and edit things, and re-record their lines to make funnier calls. So it is a bit of a mix, most likely. I don't think they fake the whole thing, more so to the extent of hiring a voice actor on Sirius horrible budget.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
I've always wondered what Howard would look like if he just dived into a pool and stood up, hair soaked and not so frizzy, his baggy swimsuit coat with boots sticking to his thin frame, his skin hanging off his skull, I'd imagine he would be pretty thin in his hair if it wasn't curled and frizzed up.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Smeep posted:

Howard pays a woman to come to his house and do his nails?? How did I miss this?

He did, didn't he? I heard he fired her because she was out to rip him off, and raised his rates once she found out who he was, never mind that anyone taking a nail kit to rich kid land to clip toenails would have a pretty good idea she is working with a rich pampered person.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Dude has caused anal fissures because he would wipe too much, Howard is nuts when it comes to that stuff. Nuts, and the means to support your insanity = Howard Hughes levels of crazy poo poo.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

sedative posted:

79 photos of Bubba's way too hot wife http://boston.barstoolsports.com/hot-gallery/wake-up-with-heather-clem/

Some are nws

Things I'm clicking when I get home from work.

Crazy Cabbie: Human poo poo stain. Does drugs, is fat, horrible human.

Chauncie Haden: Horrible poo poo stain. Writes lovely rag (or wrote) with trust fund money. I almost got a gig writing for his magazine when I wrote for another trust fund magazine of a radio guy. Glad I missed out on that.

ETM: His last name is Lynch?!?! I have no idea. He is only funny on the show when somebody is mean to him, because he is a horrible tiny poo poo stain and nobody gives him poo poo because he looks like a butterball turkey, but he is a giant cock monger and really, just really worthless and mean and stupid. Now that his IQ is in the normal range, I have no problems thinking he is purely a stupid, evil dick and not suffering from some midget brain disease.

The worlds best dwarf was and always will be Hank the Angry Dwarf. He is proof you can be a hosed up tiny ball of mistakes, but still be a cool dude. Maybe Eric just needs to drink himself stupid?

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Hey Hank, we want to put you in a Coffin.

gently caress you, sure.

Hey Hank, we want to dress you up like a bunny.

Eat my poo poo, okay, sure.

Hey Hank, we want to have you fight Beetlejuice.

Go to hell, sure, okay.



Then

Hey Eric, Fringe wants to pay you to be on the show

50 MILLION HOURS OF MIDGET DRAMA AND BULLSHIT

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
It was more likely that he didn't have a clue how the system would work and just thought he was missing out on 99 cents per show. That and you have to cut him a break, back then nobody knew about sim cards.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

mcmagic posted:

She's obviously a fame whore and a gold digger. At least i hope she is.

Howard said that she met Bubba when he was broke working local pay nothing radio and near 500 pounds, she used to wipe the poo poo out of his rear end or something. So she isn't a gold digger, but I imagine she has serious issues.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Back logging it, but in the first 2 minutes of the Ron Howard interview, he basically explains somebody on his team told him to call up Howard for the interview. I wonder if Gary is still going to stick that feather in his hat.

It's not considered getting somebody if they call you.

Also Howard was talking about American Idol and Steven Tyler, holy poo poo, is he crazy? That's going to ruin Aerosmith? It's going to make them not cool? What is this, the 90s? Aerosmith hasn't been "cool" for awhile, have they?

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

AltronHGX posted:

Oh poo poo, that's how businesses work? I just proclaim myself reviewer of x and I become instantly entitled for free copies of everything forever? How come no one ever told me this :doh:

If he approached any PR firm and offered to review movies, chances are they would throw him a bone just for the free coverage, but he insist on asking random internet people for free poo poo. He does it all wrong.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
You can't blame his parents for coddling him. He looks like he could fall apart at any second. You could assume he wouldn't have a good life and would of course want to coddle him and do the best you can to make him comfortable.

But just because somebody is disabled doesn't mean they instantly become a saint. I went to school with a bunch of disabled kids in gym class, half of them happened to be incredible assholes.

rear end in a top hat always over powers handicap.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

Mr Lance Murdock posted:

I agree that the "Artie chair" should stay empty until Artie is back but I think they should atleast start having people sit in on the show every now and then. When was the last time someone stayed on for the news?
Christ, even getting Sal in there for a day a week would be fresh.
If they did it right and used people who Artie knows and is friends with then it would probably be less of a shock to his system.
I love the big fat baby gorilla, but something has got to give.

So you want it to stay empty forever?

You can't throw somebody back into that shark tank and not expect jokes and comments, I mean, Jesus, you just called him Baby Gorilla. There is no way they could just ignore it and it would be too dangerous to let Artie slip back into the show.

If you love Artie, you can't have him back on the show. What he did, you don't just get "better" from it.

Also about Adam, Howard doesn't think he isn't a talent, he was just (rightfully) making fun of him having to do a podcast.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
That's bullshit, Eric doesn't have any friends.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

burmart posted:

Am I the only one that wonders if Howard was paid off to rave about the song "Big Big Bang?" Something just didn't seem right about him loving the song.

We all hoped the same thing with Hannah Montana during that phase.

Dude just listens to horrible music for the most part. It's either old poo poo from bands like CREAM or whatever mountain man music he likes from the 60s and horrible new pop poo poo like Britney Spears.

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
If I was three black guys, I'd have sex with Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas

null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades
Howard Stern is just horrible, he does nothing original or daring or entertaining.

*tunes in to a redneck tazering genitals*

Finally, somebody who gets me.

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null_user01013
Nov 13, 2000

Drink up comrades

burmart posted:

I think his daughters actually do, like, good works. Like with homeless people or retarded people or something.

Yeah, rich kids are usually great with this stuff. Why, Robin helped some poor people learn how to drink grass in Mexico.

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