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I've been having sex with this guy for about a month now and for the most part things are going ok. We were using condoms up until this week because I had started birth control and and had to wait 7 days to gently caress without a condom on. He's a virgin and I'm clean. My problem is that when we're done, my entire crotch is sore. I've never had this happen before. I'm unsure if it's because we're boning without a condom, or because about a week ago I waxed my bikini line or what, but it's loving painful. Basically it's like...my outer labia and all the way around it are sore. I can't explain the feeling, but it's like deep inside, too. It's worse when I stand or sit, but gets better when I'm reclining or lying down. It's really brutal, and feels almost like I have a huge bruise or something. I'm on nuvaring, 200mg of zoloft, and we use Liquid Silk lube, which I have for years. I also use a Lelo Siri vibrator but I've used that before, too. Please help my achey crotch 
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| # ¿ Jan 31, 2012 17:21 |
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| # ¿ May 18, 2013 09:28 |
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Mak0rz posted:You have a penis allergy. We're using more lube, and he's circumcised soooo. I have a feeling it might be the waxing, too. Randomity posted:Could be a side effect of your new birth control, Shnooks. I've been on Nuvaring before, though. I was on it for about two years, stopped, and just started it again. DDD: Will it go away if it is?
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| # ¿ Jan 31, 2012 18:54 |
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cuntvalet posted:Absolutely. Even if it doesn't technically go away (which is a slim to none chance) I'd assume you'd at least get used to it. But yeah, give it some time and just be a little gentler in the mean time. It doesn't hurt at all during sex, which is the weird thing I guess. Thanks 
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| # ¿ Jan 31, 2012 19:33 |
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Um...are you sure it's torn and not just made that way? Some of them just are kind of separated like that. It's not a big deal...
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| # ¿ Feb 2, 2012 03:14 |
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Koskinator posted:I posted earlier about having problems trying to get out of missionary only positions. Wait, sorry, your past post said you can't figure out how to get your penis in her vagina in other positions? I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just trying to understand more clearly.
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| # ¿ Mar 14, 2012 21:06 |
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Koskinator posted:Yes thats correct. We'll get into position for say, doggy or girl on top following tips i picked up about how best to do those positions, then for whatever reason we have a super hard time actually acheiving peneration. I dont know why, either we have a hard time making the connection or we get it a little but then i slide out when we try to get it deeper. I don't know what to do and this is extremely frustrating since most advice is written as though this is something retardly simple and we're dumbasses if we can't figure it out. Sometimes I have this problem because I'm so drat short. I'm 4' 11" and almost everyone I've dated has been 5' 8" and there's still issues with height. I found that for doggy style I've kind of had to angle my hips up. On top I have to lean forward much more. If I lean back it just pops right out. It looks so easy in porn, but in practice there's a lot of fiddling and position changing to make sure poo poo stays in. So, it's not just you that has this problem, a lot of people do. Like someone else said, the vagina is at an angle, and unless you're lucky and she's perfectly in line with your penis, someone has to angle differently to compensate.
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| # ¿ Mar 15, 2012 01:18 |
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Koskinator posted:Yes thats correct. We'll get into position for say, doggy or girl on top following tips i picked up about how best to do those positions, then for whatever reason we have a super hard time actually acheiving peneration. I dont know why, either we have a hard time making the connection or we get it a little but then i slide out when we try to get it deeper. I don't know what to do and this is extremely frustrating since most advice is written as though this is something retardly simple and we're dumbasses if we can't figure it out. Wait, re-read this. Can you like...See where you're putting it in even? It's ok to look down and watch and even guide yourself in, you know. You can even grope around and find the right place, it's fine. Can you get your fingers or anything else in at that position? If you're still getting confused get down there and take a look, I guess. That's kind of bizarre that you can't even get it all the way in. I was under the assumption you were doing it and then it just fell out, which happens.
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| # ¿ Mar 15, 2012 03:30 |
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I was in a similar position of your wife for about 3 years. I tried changing my medication, changing my birth control, talked to a therapist about it. I thought it was him for a while, and then thought maybe I was broken. It really ruined our relationship. In the end I just wasn't into him anymore. It was just that simple. I left him for another man and both of our sex lives are much more fulfilling now. It sucks to hear it, but sometimes things just don't go as planned.
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| # ¿ Mar 21, 2012 14:43 |
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You can be perfectly normal and sometimes feel down and still feel therapy. Why are you acting like it's something shameful?
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| # ¿ Apr 3, 2012 17:45 |
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I sugar my bikini line fairly regularly and have started sugaring my boyfriend's chest and belly. Sugaring is so much nicer on your skin, but the first time I did it I was still a little sore. I think 2-3 days is fine to get over the initial soreness, but my skin isn't particularly sensitive to waxing or what not. My boyfriend's chest on the other hand...I sugared it Sunday I think and its still kind of blotchy, so ymmv.
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| # ¿ Apr 11, 2012 07:59 |
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My mom has probably opened my bag of sex toys like 3 times now. Its in the same bag every time, what the hell does she think is going to be in there? I don't remember where I hid them when I was living at home...I'd say try to get like a box or makeup bag and make it look as inoffensive as possible. Like, why would your parents dig through your makeup bag? Something like that. If you have a closet you can always put it wayyyy in the back if you're super concerned. And as for PIV sex, I haven't been able to orgasm from it since I was about 16. Sometimes I'm afraid my partners don't think they're good enough when I whip out my vibrator, but the orgasms I have from clitoral stimulation are just as real, legitimate, and loving awesome as someone who gets off from PIV alone. I mean really, is it anybody's business, male or female, to judge peoples orgasms? If it feels good, who gives a gently caress. Go away and stop telling me my orgasms aren't legitimate because of your criteria that means nothing to me. I'm not having sex with you (and that's a collective "you") so its none of your business. Edit:wtf and you know that kind of attitude totally ignores people who physically can't have PIV sex for whatever reason. Not every woman is capable of having it, either due to sexual preference or medical issues (there's probably plenty more reasons). I feel like it's on par with saying gay men don't have real sex because its not PIV. Shnooks fucked around with this message at May 4, 2012 around 13:12 |
| # ¿ May 4, 2012 11:29 |
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Can we talk about STIs here? I went to Planned Parenthood yesterday and they told me I have BV, which is fine and I've had it before and they gave me antibiotics. Except that I'm bloated as gently caress, like, enough that it hurts. And I'm having cramping. And the itching is awful. I have an IUD which is why I rushed over to PP ASAP, but meanwhile it's physically painful to wear jeans and I don't own anything else. Has anyone else experienced this or should I like rush back to the doctor? I'm really not looking forward to work. I do a lot of bending.
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| # ¿ May 12, 2012 17:21 |
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NaturalLow posted:Personally I think going back and telling them about these symptoms would be a good idea. Bloating and cramping don't really sound like BV (which isn't technically an STI, but that's just me nitpicking). When I went yesterday I got a full exam - she even took swabs and looked at samples under the microscope. I guess what I'm concerned about is PID because of my IUD or a UTI. I'm taking Flagyl vaginally right now and just started it yesterday. I'm just apprehensive to go back because besides not having time till next Wednesday possibly to go, they don't take my insurance and don't charge on a sliding scale. My boyfriend and I are monogamous and I'm the only person he's been with. I was tested for ghonnorhea and chlamydia in February before my IUD and that came up clear.
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| # ¿ May 12, 2012 20:57 |
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NaturalLow posted:Well in that case, just from searching around the itching could possibly be the flagyl (but I'm not a doctor, I'm just going by the list of side effects out there). No idea about the other stuff though. Maybe as a compromise, you could call the clinic the next time they're open and ask for their opinion? Yeah, I looked to see if there was a clinic I could call today, but I'll see about calling Monday if it doesn't get better. Thanks for letting me hijack the sex thread.
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| # ¿ May 12, 2012 22:47 |
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GreenBuckanneer posted:Like a vibrator shape with a base flare, something not to fill and keep in but to play with. Fun factory has a non-vibrating one that you can put on the floor or suction to things and its pretty nondescript. I think its called amour or magnum. Dunno if its the right size for you. Edit: its 100% silicone Shnooks fucked around with this message at May 21, 2012 around 23:30 |
| # ¿ May 21, 2012 22:15 |
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I think I need some advice. To preface I'm in therapy and plan to bring this up if I can remember to. Basically any time my partner asks me for sex I feel obligated to comply, no matter the circumstances. In the past I've definitely been pressured into having sex with my past partners, eventually just loving them without even wanting to to make them happy. I was told by a lot of people if I didn't put out that they'd leave me and my relationship was null and void, essentially. I guess to use an anecdote to what is occurring now - my partner of about 6 months and I went on vacation at my family's house. We couldn't have sex for a week, and now I have an abscess on my scene's duct that hurts like a bitch and I'm taking antibiotics for. If we go without loving for one day, for whatever reason, I feel like its some sort of productions. I feel like he tells me, "but jerking off isn't the same! Can't you just get me off?" But like today, it hasn't even been an hour since we got home from a 5 hour train ride. My crotch hurts from this abscess. We have no groceries, and all I've had to eat is potato chips and water. And all week he's just complained how badly his nuts hurt because we haven't hosed and he wouldn't go and jerk off to deal with it. So of course now I feel like garbage because he's obviously uncomfortable and frankly I don't really feel like putting out right now. I know I'm his first girlfriend and first person he's ever had sex with but its just not going to happen every night. Right now we live in a studio apartment and have very little privacy. I feel like utter trash because I always feel like when he asks me for sex its at the worst possible times. I feel almost like I'm being taken advantage of - that he knows ill give in, so he asks and expects me to deliver. Now, I know and HOPE that that isn't his intentions, but its how I feel about the situation. Sometimes I feel like I have to cover my body all the time lest he gets aroused and then expects me to gently caress. Part of it is his problem, too. He has no clue about anything when it comes to sex. He can't even ask me if I wanna gently caress half the time, but then he does and I have a meltdown. When we're both down its nothing short of amazing. I guess I'm unsure what to do. Am I alone in feeling this way? Like I have to put out no matter how I feel to essentially shut him up? He ends up jerking off in bed right next to me without asking and it makes me very uncomfortable, like I'm part of a sex act I haven't consented to. We have talked about this but I'm not sure if I'm starting to sound nagging or not. There's only so many times I can break down before I become some crazy, frigid bitch to him. And I'm really tired of being labelled that. Edit: like OK last month I had BV and the entire time I was just feeling pressured to just get over it already so he can screw me. It really was horribly uncomfortable and I didn't want to have it in the first place. Now we've only had like a week of actually having sex this month between the vacation and my abscess and I feel like a huge failure because I'm unable to provide for my boyfriend Shnooks fucked around with this message at Jun 23, 2012 around 23:00 |
| # ¿ Jun 23, 2012 22:55 |
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I guess I just can't figure out if it's all in my head or not. Maybe I am crazy?
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| # ¿ Jun 23, 2012 23:51 |
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Dead Cow posted:Are you actually horny right now and the thing keeping you away is the abscess? If so, there is nothing wrong with mutual masturbation. Not everything has to be PiV. But if you don't want to then YOU don't have to do anything. Don't let people bully you into sex, that's coercion and it's against your will. No, I'm tired and my body hurts. Sometimes I'm horny but I know that if I have sex it will hurt, such as during my period when my cervix gets pretty low.
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| # ¿ Jun 24, 2012 01:35 |
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Thanks everyone. Just so you know, we did speak about this before I posted and we spoke about it afterwords and we are making some serious changes in our relationship that are probably long overdue for the both of us.
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| # ¿ Jun 24, 2012 20:26 |
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Runcible Cat posted:Good for you both, and good luck to both of you too. Of course, I definitely want to. Thanks guys
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| # ¿ Jun 24, 2012 21:22 |
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elise the great posted:Just had that giant ovarian cyst removed, and thought I'd give y'all an update: Holy crap, they took pictures?! I kind of want to see this.
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| # ¿ Aug 8, 2012 00:45 |
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Coming from someone who thought that their failing relationship needed a third person to succeed - don't do it. Well, don't do it unless you want to get in a relationship with someone else. My previous relationship was in the gutter for about 2 years. Our sex life went to absolute poo poo and we just weren't haven't sex. I thought it was me, I thought it was him, I thought maybe it was my medication. I think I always knew our relationship was over but I was afraid or unwilling to admit it. Eventually we discussed "opening" the relationship. He was allowed to be with other people as long as he told me (he wasn't with anyone, as far as I know), and I was allowed to be with other people as long as he approved of it. What it ultimately led to was me falling for the other guy I was with and leaving my SO of 4 years. It made me realize I wasn't happy with what I had, that I felt I could do better, and it was a disservice to both of us to continue this relationship. I shouldn't be with someone I don't want to be intimate with, and he doesn't deserve to be stuck with someone who doesn't want to be around him. We're both a lot better and happier now, but if you're having intimacy issues opening up the relationship is not going to save it.
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| # ¿ Aug 14, 2012 02:21 |
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Has anyone used those We III vibes? We've been thinking about getting one, mostly for hands free stimulation for me when I'm wearing a strap on.
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| # ¿ Aug 23, 2012 16:51 |
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Manky posted:You don't get complaints about callouses? I play a lot of guitar and bass, and my fingers get rough and hard, and I've heard it can be sort of scratchy on delicate parts of the body. It's a real shame, because I like using my fingers. But I'm more than happy to keep a tongue and magic wand in backup. My boyfriend has disgusting callouses, to say the least. He's a weightlifter and it's incredible how big they can get. That being said, as long as he doesn't let like, a piece of it hang off, I've never noticed them and they've never been scratchy to me. Of course everyone is different, but I don't think it's nearly as big of a problem.
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| # ¿ Aug 24, 2012 12:02 |
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Bollock Monkey posted:"I'd prefer not to say, I will discuss it with the doctor." I'm from NJ and currently live in MA and I've had the same experience. They want to know before the appointment. When I tried telling them that I'd prefer not to say, I've been told I have to give something or they try to pull it out of me.
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| # ¿ Sep 9, 2012 10:56 |
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Oh wow, for some reason I thought my boyfriend and I were the only couple to not share blankets. I know that's irrational but nobody else I know does. Personally I like to sleep with 2-3 blankets and he likes 1 and we like to burrito so it works out better for us, but they're two full-sized blankets instead of two twin-sized blankets. As for sex in the cold, its really hard but shower sex maybe? We live in a drafty house and its about 9F here lately so I understand. We pile on the blankets and do most of our thing under there.
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| # ¿ Jan 27, 2013 11:05 |
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It sounds like you need some therapy and to stop smoking so much weed. Also, seeing a doctor can't hurt.
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| # ¿ Feb 7, 2013 10:55 |
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Genderman posted:Are there any lubes out there that you dont have to wash off and wont leave a sticky residue when it dries up? Water based lubes. I found that some get kind of flaky when they dry, but you don't have to wash it off or anything if you don't want to. And they're definitely not sticky. Sometimes I want to say its even moisturizing.
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| # ¿ Mar 15, 2013 02:23 |
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Doom Rooster posted:Get dental dams and use them. As I understand it, you go down on her, then put the dental drat over her mouth (hence, you know... DENTAL) and then kiss her through the latex. Um what, no. Is this a joke? A dental dam is used by placing it over the vulva or wherever you're licking and using it that way. Its just called a dental dam because they're normally used in dental medicine I believe, but they're pretty thin material. Not the sexiest thing but for partners you don't know its a good idea to use it. You could very well kiss her with it but that seems like a lot of trouble.
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| # ¿ Apr 6, 2013 07:54 |
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| # ¿ May 18, 2013 09:28 |
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ManOfTheYear posted:In GBS there's a thread about some artist's videos where girls get orgasms by a vibrator while reading books out loud. Are the girls faking it or not? Do women really enjoy orgasms so intesly? Are you asking if women enjoy intense orgasms? Do you like intense orgasms?
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| # ¿ Apr 18, 2013 21:14 |
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