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If it's preying on your mind to that extent then the absolute best thing you can do is talk to your boyfriend so it's not a big looming THING you feel you have to hide. If you really can't get it out of your head, therapy may help - but to be honest a lot of the anxiety will likely go away once you've talked it through, whatever the outcome. The important thing is that you're not a freak, and nothing is wrong with you. This really is just how some people are wired. There's a whole lot of advocates for the whole concept of being 'child-free' - a lot of folks who feel this way think that's a much better term than 'childless', without the loaded implications. Admittedly some of 'em are a bit rabid and get very angry about paying taxes which go to state child-support benefits and whatnot, but a lot are just people who are very sick of the pressure and assumptions that if you don't have/want kids, then you're screwed up. Looking into some of their websites etc might help you feel more normal about it all. In any case - sometimes, people feel very strongly about this stuff for the rest of their lives, and sometimes it suddenly changes overnight. 23 is pretty young, in those terms. Me, I went from "gently caress NO" as a teenager and in my early twenties to "you know what? I REALLY want kids now", almost overnight at the age of 26. Like, if I could afford all the expenses involved, I'd start trying to get pregnant tomorrow, no questions about it and to hell with everything else. And it was a mindfuck. But - that's a normal thing, and not having that shift is also a normal thing. Don't let anyone guilt-trip, nag or pressure you into thinking otherwise.
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# ¿ Jul 29, 2011 11:28 |
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# ¿ Mar 29, 2024 13:18 |