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Limiting Factor
Dec 19, 2006

well dammit
If it's preying on your mind to that extent then the absolute best thing you can do is talk to your boyfriend so it's not a big looming THING you feel you have to hide. If you really can't get it out of your head, therapy may help - but to be honest a lot of the anxiety will likely go away once you've talked it through, whatever the outcome.

The important thing is that you're not a freak, and nothing is wrong with you. This really is just how some people are wired. There's a whole lot of advocates for the whole concept of being 'child-free' - a lot of folks who feel this way think that's a much better term than 'childless', without the loaded implications. Admittedly some of 'em are a bit rabid and get very angry about paying taxes which go to state child-support benefits and whatnot, but a lot are just people who are very sick of the pressure and assumptions that if you don't have/want kids, then you're screwed up. Looking into some of their websites etc might help you feel more normal about it all.

In any case - sometimes, people feel very strongly about this stuff for the rest of their lives, and sometimes it suddenly changes overnight. 23 is pretty young, in those terms. Me, I went from "gently caress NO" as a teenager and in my early twenties to "you know what? I REALLY want kids now", almost overnight at the age of 26. Like, if I could afford all the expenses involved, I'd start trying to get pregnant tomorrow, no questions about it and to hell with everything else. And it was a mindfuck.

But - that's a normal thing, and not having that shift is also a normal thing. Don't let anyone guilt-trip, nag or pressure you into thinking otherwise.

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